T'l  B  RAR.Y 

OF  THL 

UNIVERSITY 
OF    ILLINOIS 

MERTEN  J.  MANDEVILLE 

COLLECTION  IN  PARAPSYCHOLOGY 

AND  OCCULT  SCIENCES 

O  3T"i!j  Do 

OhE 


1904 


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GEORGE  EBERS, 


HOMO  SUM. 


A  NOVEL. 


BY  GEORGE  EBERS, 

Author  of  "Egyptian  Princess,"  "Uarda,"  "Bride  of  (he 'Nile,' 

Burgomaster's   Wife,"  "The  Emperor,"  "Only  a, 

Word,"  "The  Sisters,"  "Joshua." 


YORK: 
A.  L.  BURT,  PUBLISHER. 


PREFACE. 


IN  the  course  of  ray  labors  preparatory  to  writing 
a  history  of  the  Sinaitic  peninsula,  the  study  of  the 
first  centuries  of  Christianity  for  a  long  time  claimed 
my  attention ;  and  in  the  mass  of  martyrology,  of 
ascetic  writings,  and  of  histories  of  saints  and  monks, 
which  it  was  necessary  to  work  through  and  sift  for 
my  strictly  limited  object,  I  came  upon  a  narrative 
(in  Cotelerius  Ecclesiae  Grecae  Monumenta)  which 
seemed  to  me  peculiar  and  touching  notwithstand- 
ing its  improbability.  Sinai  and  the  oasis  of  Pharan 
which  lies  at  its  foot  were  the  scene  of  action. 

When,  in  my  journey  through  Arabia  Petraea,  I 
saw  the  caves  of  the  anchorites  of  Sinai  with  my 
own  eyes  and  trod  their  soil  with  my  own  feet,  that 
story  recurred  to  my  mind  and  did  not  cease  to  haunt 
me  while  I  travelled  on  farther  in  the  desert. 

A  soul's  problem  of  the  most  exceptional  type 
seemed  to  me  to  be  offered  by  the  simple  course  of 
this  little  history. 

An  anchorite,  falsely  accused  instead  of  another, 
takes  his  punishment  of  expulsion  on  himself  with- 
out exculpating  himself,  and  his  innocence  becomes 
known  only  through  the  confession  of  the  real  cul- 
prit. 

5 


6  PREFACE. 

There  was  a  peculiar  fascination  in  imagining 
what  the  emotions  of  a  soul  might  be  which  could 
lead  to  such  apathy  (dnddsta),  to  such  an  annihilation 
of  all  sensibility  ;  and  while  the  very  deeds  and 
thoughts  of  the  strange  cave-dweller  grew  more  and 
more  vivid  in  my  mind  the  figure  of  Paulus  took 
form,  as  it  were  as  an  example,  and  soon  a  crowd  of 
ideas  gathered  round  it,  growing  at  last  to  a  distinct 
entity,  which  excited  and  urged  me  on  till  I  ventured 
to  give  it  artistic  expression  in  the  form  of  a  narra- 
tive. I  was  prompted  to  elaborate  this  subject — 
which  had  long  been  shaping  itself  to  perfect  concep- 
tion in  my  mind  as  ripe  material  for  a  romance — by 
my  readings  in  Coptic  -monkish  annals,  to  which  I 
was  led  by  Abel's  Coptic  studies  ;  and  I  afterwards 
received  a  further  stimulus  from  the  small  but 
weighty  essay  by  H.  "Weingarten  on  the  origin  of 
monasticism,  in  which  I  still  study  the  early  cen- 
turies of  Christianity,  especially  in  Egypt. 

This  is  not  the  place  in  which  to  indicate  the 
points  on  which  I  feel  myself  obliged  to  differ  from 
Weingarten.  My  acute  fellow-laborer  at  Breslau 
clears  away  much  which  does  not  deserve  to  remain, 
but  in  many  parts  of  his  book  he  seems  to  me  to 
sweep  with  too  hard  a  broom. 

Easy  as  it  would  have  been  to  lay  the  date  of  my 
story  in  the  beginning  of  the  fortieth  year  of  the 
fourth  century  instead  of  the  thirtieth,  I  have  for- 
borne from  doing  so  because  I  feel  able  to  prove 
with  certainty  that  at  the  time  which  I  have  chosen 
there  were  not  only  heathen  recluses 


PREFACE.  7 

in  the  temples  of  Serapis  but  also  Christian  anchor- 
ites ;  I  fully  agree  with  him  that  the  beginnings  of 
organized  Christian  monasticism  can  in  no  case  be 
dated  earlier  than  the  year  350. 

The  Paulus  of  my  story  must  not  be  confounded 
•with  the  "  first  hermit,"  Paulus  of  Thebes,  whom 
Weingarten  has  with  good  reason  struck  out  of  the 
category  of  historical  personages.  He,  with  all  the 
figures  in  this  narrative,  is  a  purely  fictitious  person, 
the  vehicle  for  an  idea,  neither  more  nor  less.  I 
selected  no  particular  model  for  my  hero,  and  I  claim 
for  him  no  attribute  but  that  of  his  having  been 
possible  at  the  period ;  least  of  all  did  I  think  of 
Saint  Anthony,  who  is  now  deprived  even  of  his  dis- 
tinguished biographer  Athanasius,  and  who  is  rep- 
resented as  a  man  of  very  sound  judgment  but  of 
so  scant  an  education  that  he  was  master  only 
of  Egyptian. 

The  dogmatic  controversies  which  were  already 
kindled  at  the  time  of  my  story  I  have,  on  careful 
consideration,  avoided  mentioning.  The  dwellers 
on  Sinai  and  in  the  oasis  took  an  eager  part  in  them 
at  a  later  date. 

That  Mount  Sinai  to  which  1  desire  to  transport 
the  reader  must  not  be  confounded  with  the  mount- 
ain which  lies  at  a  long  day's  journey  to  the  south 
of  it.  It  is  this  that  has  borne  the  name,  at  any  rate 
since  the  time  of  Justinian ;  the  celebrated  convent 
of  the  Transfiguration  lies  at  its  foot,  and  it  has  been 
commonly  accepted  as  the  Sinai  of  Scripture.  In 
the  description  of  my  journey  through  Arabia 


8  PREFACE. 

Petrasa  I  have  endeavored  to  bring  fresh  proof  of 
the  view,  first  introduced  by  Lepsius,  that  the  giant- 
mountain,  now  called  Serbal,  must  be  regarded  as 
the  mount  on  which  the  law  was  given — and  was 
indeed  so  regarded  before  the  time  of  Justinian — 
and  not  the  Sinai  of  the  monks. 

As  regards  the  stone  house  of  the  Senator  Petrus, 
with  its  windows  opening  on  the  street — contrary 
to  eastern  custom — I  may  remark,  in  anticipation 
of  well-founded  doubts,  that  to  this  day  wonderfully 
well-preserved,  fire-proof  walls  stand  in  the  oasis  of 
Pharan,  the  remains  of  a  pretty  large  number  of 
similar  buildings. 

But  these  and  such  external  details  hold  a  quite 
secondary  place  in  this  study  of  a  soul.  "While  in 
my  earlier  romances  the  scholar  was  compelled  to 
make  concessions  to  the  poet  and  the  poet  to  the 
scholar,  in  this  one  I  have  not  attempted  to  instruct, 
nor  sought  to  clothe  the  outcome  of  my  studies  in 
forms  of  flesh  and  blood ;  I  have  aimed  at  absolutely 
nothing  but  to  give  artistic  expression  to  the  vivid 
realization  of  an  idea  that  had  deeply  stirred  my 
soul.  The  simple  figures  whose  inmost  being  I  have 
endeavored  to  reveal  to  the  reader  fill  the  canvas  of 
a  picture  where,  in  the  dark  background,  rolls  the 
flowing  ocean  of  the  world's  history. 

The  Latin  title  was  suggested  to  me  by  an  often 
used  motto  which  exactly  agrees  with  the  funda- 
mental view  to  which  I  have  been  led  by  my  medi- 
tations on  the  mind  and  being  of  man ;  even  of  those 
men  who  deem  that  they  have  climbed  the  very 


PREFACE.  9 

highest  steps  of  that  stair  which  leads  into  the 
Heavens. 

In  the  Heautontiraorumenos  of  Terence,  Chremes 
answers  his  neighbor  Menedemus  (Act  1,  Sc.  1,  v. 
25); 

"  Homo  sum ;  humani  nil  a  me  alienum  puto," 
which  Donner  translates  literally  : 

"  I  am  human,  nothing  that  is  human  can  I  regard 
as  alien  to  me." 

But  Cicero  and  Seneca  already  used  this  line  as  a 
proverb,  and  in  a  sense  which  far  transcends  that 
which  it  would  seem  to  convey  in  context  with  the 
passage  whence  it  is  taken ;  and  as  I  coincide  with 
them,  I  have  transferred  it  to  the  title-page  of  this 
book  with  this  meaning : 

"  I  am  a  man ;  and  I  feel  that  I  am  above  all  else 
a  man." 

Leipzig,  November  11,  1877. 

GEOKG  EBEKS. 


HOMO  SUM. 


CHAPTEK  1. 

ROCKS — naked,  hard,  red-brown  rocks  all  round ; 
not  a  bush,  not  a  blade,  not  a  clinging  moss  such  as 
elsewhere  nature  has  lightly  flung  on  the  rocky  sur- 
face of  the  heights,  as  if  a  breath  of  her  creative  life 
had  softly  touched  the  barren  stone.  Nothing  but 
smooth  granite,  and  above  it  a  sky  as  bare  of  cloud 
as  the  rocks  are  of  shrubs  and  herbs. 

And  yet  in  every  cave  of  the  mountain  wall  there 
moves  a  human  life  ;  two  small  gray  birds  too  float 
softly  in  the  pure,  light  air  of  the  desert  that  glows  in 
the  noonday  sun,  and  then  they  vanish  behind  a  range 
of  cliffs  which  shuts  in  the  deep  gorge  as  though  it 
were  a  wall  built  by  man. 

There  it  is  pleasant  enough,  for  a  spring  bedews 
the  stony  soil ;  and  there,  as  wherever  any  moisture 
touches  the  desert,  aromatic  plants  thrive,  and  umbra- 
geous bushes  grow.  When  Osiris  embraced  the  god- 
dess of  the  desert — so  runs  the  Egyptian  myth — he 
left  his  green  wreath  on  her  couch. 

But  at  the  time  and  in  the  sphere  where  our  his- 

11 


12  HOMO   SUM. 

tory  moves  the  old  legends  are  no  longer  known  or 
are  ignored.  We  must  carry  the  reader  back  to  the 
beginning  of  the  thirtieth  year  of  the  fourth  cen- 
tury after  the  birth  of  the  Saviour,  and  away  to  the 
mountains  of  Sinai  on  whose  sacred  ground  solitary 
Anchorites  have  for  some  few  years  been  dwelling — 
men  weary  of  the  world,  and  vowed  to  penitence, 
but  as  yet  without  connection  or  rule  among  them- 
selves. 

Near  the  spring  in  the  little  ravine  of  which  we 
have  spoken  grows  a  many-branched  feathery  palm, 
but  it  does  not  shelter  it  from  the  piercing  rays  of 
the  sun  of  those  latitudes ;  it  seems  only  to  protect 
the  roots  of  the  tree  itself  ;  still  the  feathered  boughs 
are  strong  enough  to  support  a  small  thread-bare 
blue  cloth,  which  projects  like  a  penthouse,  screening 
the  face  of  the  girl  who  lies  dreaming,  stretched  at 
full-length  on  the  glowing  stones,  while  a  few  yellow- 
ish mountain-goats  spring  from  stone  to  stone  in 
search  of  pasture  as  gayly  as  though  they  found  the 
midday  heat  pleasant  and  exhilarating.  From  time 
to  time  the  girl  seizes  the  herdsman's  crook  that  lies 
beside  her,  and  calls  the  goats  with  a  hissing  cry  that 
is  audible  at  a  considerable  distance.  A  young  kid 
comes  dancing  up  to  her.  Few  beasts  can  give  ex- 
pression to  their  feelings  of  delight ;  but  young  goats 
can. 

The  girl  puts  out  her  bare  slim  foot,  and  playfully 
pushes  back  the  little  kid  who  attacks  her  in  fun, 
pushes  it  again  and  again  each  time  it  skips  forward 
and  in  so  doing  the  shepherdess  bends  her  toes  as 


HOMO   SUM.  13 

gracefully  as  if  she  wished  some  looker-on  to  admire 
their  slender  form.  Once  more  the  kid  springs  for- 
ward, and  this  time  with  its  head  down.  Its  brow 
touches  the  sole  of  her  foot,  but  as  it  rubs  its  little 
hooked  nose  tenderly  against  the  girl's  foot,  she 
pushes  it  back  so  violently  that  the  little  beast  starts 
away,  and  ceases  its  game  with  loud  bleating. 

It  was  just  as  if  the  girl  had  been  waiting  for  the 
right  moment  to  hit  the  kid  sharply ;  for  the  kick 
was  a  hard  one — almost  a  cruel  one.  The  blue  cloth 
hid  the  face  of  the  maiden,  but  her  eyes  must  surely 
have  sparkled  brightly  when  she  so  roughly  stopped 
the  game.  For  a  minute  she  remained  motionless ; 
but  the  cloth,  which  had  fallen  low  over  her  face, 
waved  gently  to  and  fro,  moved  by  her  fluttering 
breath.  She  was  listening  with  eager  attention,  with 
passionate  expectation ;  her  convulsively  clenched 
toes  betrayed  her. 

Then  a  noise  became  audible  ;  it  came  from  the 
direction  of  the  rough  stair  of  unhewn  blocks,  which 
led  from  the  steep  wall  of  the  ravine  down  to  the 
spring.  A  shudder  of  terror  passed  through  the 
tender,  and  not  yet  fully  developed  limbs  of  the 
shepherdess ;  still  she  did  not  move  ;  the  gray  birds 
Avhich  were  now  sitting  on  a  thorn-bush  near  her  flew 
up,  but  they  had  merely  heard  a  noise  and  could  not 
distinguish  who  it  was  that  it  announced. 

The  shepherdess's  ear  was  sharper  than  theirs. 
She  heard  that  a  man  was  approaching,  and  well 
knew  that  one  only  trod  with  such  a  step.  She  put  out 
her  hand  for  a  stone  that  lay  near  her,  and  flung  it 


*I4  HOMO   SUM. 

into  the  spring  so  that  the  waters  immediately  be- 
came troubled ;  then  she  turned  on  her  side,  and  lay 
as  if  asleep  with  her  head  on  her  arm.  The  heavy 
steps  became  more  and  more  distinctly  audible. 

A  tall  youth  was  descending  the  rocky  stair ;  by 
his  dress  he  was  seen  to  be  one  of  the  anchorites  of 
Sinai,  for  he  wore  nothing  but  a  shirt-shaped  gar- 
ment of  coarse  linen,  which  he  seemed  to  have  out- 
grown, and  raw  leather  sandals,  which  were  tied  on 
to  his  feet  with  fibrous  palm  bast. 

No  slave  could  be  more  poorly  clothed  by  his 
owner,  and  yet  no  one  would  have  taken  him  for  a 
bondman,  for  he  walked  erect  and  self-possessed. 
He  could  not  be  more  than  twenty  years  of  age ; 
that  was  evident  in  the  young  soft  hair  on  his  upper 
lip,  chin,  and  cheeks ;  but  in  his  large  blue  eyes  there 
shone  no  light  of  youth,  only  discontent,  and  his  lips 
were  firmly  closed  as  if  in  defiance. 

He  now  stood  still,  and  pushed  back  from  his  fore- 
head the  superabundant  and  unkempt  brown  hair 
that  flowed  round  his  head  like  a  lion's  mane ;  then 
he  approached  the  well,  and  as  he  stooped  to  draw 
the  water  in  the  large  dried  gourd  shell  which  ho 
held,  he  observed  first  that  the  spring  was  muddy, 
and  then  perceived  the  goats,  and  at  last  their  sleep- 
ing mistress. 

He  impatiently  set  down  the  vessel  and  called  the 
girl  loudly,  but  she  did  not  move  till  he  touched  her 
somewhat  roughly  with  his  foot.  Then  she  sprang 
up  as  if  stung  by  an  asp,  and  two  eyes  as  black  as 
night  flashed  at  him  out  of  her  dark  young  face ;  thq 


HOMO   SUM.  15 

delicate  nostrils  of  her  aquiline  nose  quivered,  and 
her  white  teeth  gleamed  as  she  cried, 

"  Am  I  a  dog  that  you  wake  me  in  this  fashion  ?  " 

He  colored,  pointed  sullenly  to  the  well  and  said 
sharply:  "Your  cattle  have  troubled  the  water 
again ;  I  shall  have  to  wait  here  till  it  is  clear  and  I 
can  draw  some." 

"  The  day  is  long,"  answered  the  shepherdess,  and 
while  she  rose  she  pushed,  as  if  by  chance,  another 
stone  into  the  water. 

Her  triumphant,  flashing  glance  as  she  looked 
down  into  the  troubled  spring  did  not  escape  the 
young  man,  and  he  exclaimed  angrily, 

'•  He  is  right !  You  are  a  venomous  snake — a  de- 
mon of  hell." 

She  raised  herself  and  made  a  face  at  him,  as  if  she 
wished  to  show  him  that  she  really  was  some  horri- 
ble fiend ;  the  unusual  sharpness  of  her  mobile  and 
youthful  features  gave  her  a  particular  facility  for 
doing  so.  And  she  fully  attained  her  end,  for  he 
drew  back  with  a  look  of  horror,  stretched  out  his 
arms  to  repel  her,  and  exclaimed  as  he  saw  her  un- 
controllable laughter, 

"  Back,  demon,  back !  In  the  name  of  the  Lord ! 
I  ask  thee,  who  art  thou  ?  " 

"  I  am  Miriam — who  else  should  I  be  ? "  she  an- 
swered haughtily 

He  had  expected  a  different  reply,  her  vivacity 
annoyed  him,  and  he  said  angrily,  "  Whatever  your 
name  is  you  are  a  fiend,  and  I  will  ask  Paulus  to  for- 
bid you  to  water  your  beasts  at  our  well." 


l6  HOMO   SUM. 

"You  might  run  to  your  nurse,  and  complain  of  me 
to  her  if  you  had  one,"  she  answered,  pouting  her 
lips  contemptuously  at  him. 

He  colored ;  she  went  on  boldly,  and  with  eager 
play  of  gesture. 

"  You  ought  to  be  a  man,  for  you  are  strong  and 
big,  but  you  let  yourself  be  kept  like  a  child  or  a 
miserable  girl;  your  only  business  is  to  hunt  for 
roots  and  berries,  and  fetch  water  in  that  wretched 
thing  there.  I  have  learned  to  do  that  ever  since  I 
was  as  big  as  that !  "  and  she  indicated  a  contemptibly 
little  measure,  with  the  outstretched  pointed  fingers 
of  her  two  hands,  which  were  not  less  expressively 
mobile  than  her  features.  "  Phoh !  you  are  stronger 
and  taller  than  all  the  Amalekite  lads  down  there, 
but  you  never  try  to  measure  yourself  with  them  in 
shooting  with  a  bow  and  arrows  or  in  throwing  a 
spear ! " 

"  If  I  only  dared  as  much  as  I  wish !  "  he  inter- 
rupted, and  flaming  scarlet  mounted  to  his  face,  "  I 
would  be  a  match  for  ten  of  those  lean  rascals." 

"  I  believe  you,"  replied  the  girl,  and  her  eager 
glance  measured  the  youth's  broad  breast  and  mus- 
cular arms  with  an  expression  of  pride.  "  I  believe 
you,  but  why  do  you  not  dare  ?  Are  you  the  slave 
of  that  man  up  there  ? " 

"  He  is  my  father  and  besides — " 

"  What  besides  ? "  she  cried,  waving  her  hand  as 
if  to  wave  away  a  bat.  "  If  no  bird  ever  flew  away 
from  the  nest  there  would  be  a  pretty  swarm  in  it. 
Look  at  my  kids  there — as  long  as  they  need  their 


HOMO   SUM.  17 

mother  they  run  about  after  her,  but  as  soon  as  they 
can  find  their  food  alone  they  seek  it  wherever  they 
can  find  it,  and  I  can  tell  you  the  yearlings  there 
have  quite  forgotten  whether  they  sucked  the  yellow 
dam  or  the  brown  one.  And  what  great  things 
does  your  father  do  for  you  ?  " 

"  Silence  !  "  interrupted  the  youth  with  excited 
indignation.  "  The  evil  one  speaks  through  thee. 
Get  thee  from  me,  for  I  dare  not  hear  that  which  I 
dare  not  utter." 

"  Dare,  dare,  dare  !  "  she  sneered.  "  What  do  you 
dare  then  ?  not  even  to  listen  !  " 

"  At  any  rate  not  to  what  you  have  to  say,  you 
goblin !  "  he  exclaimed  vehemently.  "  Your  voice 
is  hateful  to  me,  and  if  I  meet  you  again  by  the  well 
I  will  drive  you  away  with  stones." 

While  he  spoke  thus  she  stared  speechless  at  him, 
the  blood  had  left  her  lips,  and  she  clenched  her 
small  hands.  He  was  about  to  pass  her  to  fetch 
some  water,  but  she  stepped  into  his  path,  and  held 
him  spell-bound  with  the  fixed  gaze  of  her  eyes.  A 
cold  chill  ran  through  him  when  she  asked  him  with 
trembling  lips  and  a  smothered  voice,  "  What  harm 
have  I  done  you  ? " 

"  Leave  me  !  "  said  he,  and  he  raised  his  hand  to 
push  her  away  from  the  water. 

"  You  shall  not  touch  me,"  she  cried  beside  her- 
self. "  What  harm  have  I  done  you  ? " 

"  You  know  nothing  of  God,"  he  answered,  "  and 
he  who  is  not  of  God  is  of  the  Devil." 

"  You  do  not  say  that  of  yourself,"  answered  she, 
2 


18  HOMO   SUM. 

and  her  voice  recovered  its  tone  of  light  mockery, 
"  What  they  let  you  believe  pulls  the  wires  of  }rour 
tongue  just  as  a  hand  pulls  the  strings  of  a  puppet. 
Who  told  you  that  I  was  of  the  Devil  ?  " 

"  Why  should  I  conceal  it  from  you  ?  "  he  answered 
proudly.  "  Our  pious  Paulus  warned  me  against 
you,  and  I  will  thank  him  for  it.  '  The  Evil  one,'  he 
says,  'looks  out  of  your  eyes,'  and  he  is  right,  a 
thousand  times  right.  When  you  look  at  me  I  feel 
as  if  I  could  tread  every  thing  that  is  holy  under 
foot ;  only  last  night  again  I  dreamed  I  was  whirling 
in  a  dance  with  you — " 

At  these  words  all  gravity  and  spite  vanished 
from  Miriam's  eyes ;  she  clapped  her  hands  and 
cried,  "  If  it  had  only  been  the  fact  and  not  a  dream  ! 
Only  do  not  be  frightened  again,  you  fool !  Do  you 
know  then  what  it  is  when  the  pipes  sound,  and  the 
lutes  tinkle,  and  our  feet  fly  round  in  circles  as  if 
they  had  wings  ?  " 

"  The  wings  of  Satan,"  Hermas  interrupted  sternly. 
"  You  are  a  demon,  a  hardened  heathen." 

"  So  says  our  pious  Paulus,"  laughed  the  girl. 

"  So  say  I  too,"  cried  the  young  man.  "  Who 
ever  saw  you  in  the  assemblies  of  the  just  ?  Do  you 
pray  ?  Do  you  ever  praise  the  Lord  and  our  Sav- 
iour?" 

"  And  what  should  I  praise  them  for  ? "  asked 
Miriam.  "  Because  I  am  regarded  as  a  foul  fiend  by 
the  most  pious  among  you  perhaps  ? " 

"  But  it  is  because  you  are  a  sinner  that  Heaven 
denies  you  its  blessing." 


HOMO   SUM.  19 

"  No — no,  a  thousand  times  no !  "  cried  Miriam. 
"  No  god  has  ever  troubled  himself  about  me.  And 
if  I  am  not  good,  why  should  I  be  when  noth- 
ing but  evil  ever  has  fallen  to  my  share  ?  Do  you 
know  who  I  am  and  how  I  became  so  ?  I  was 
wicked,  perhaps,  when  both  my  parents  were  slain 
in  their  pilgrimage  hither?  Why,  I  was  then  no 
more  than  six  years  old,  and  what  is  a  child  of 
that  age!  But  I  still  very  well  remember  that 
there  were  many  camels  grazing  near  our  house,  and 
horses  too  that  belonged  to  us,  and  that  on  a  hand 
that  often  caressed  me — it  was  my  mother's  hand — 
a  large  jewel  shone.  I  had  a  black  slave  too  that 
obeyed  me;  when  she  and  I  did  not  agree,  I  used  to 
hang  on  to  her  gray  woolly  hair  and  beat  her.  Who 
knows  what  may  have  become  of  her  ?  I  did  not 
love  her,  but  if  I  had  her  now,  how  kind  I  would 
be  to  her.  And  now  for  twelve  years  I  myself 
have  eaten  the  bread  of  servitude,  and  have  kept 
Senator  Petrus's  goats,  and  if  I  ventured  to  show 
myself  at  a  festival  among  the  free  maidens,  they 
would  turn  me  out  and  pull  the  wreath  out  of  my 
hair.  And  am  I  to  be  thankful  ?  What  for,  I  won- 
der ?  And  pious  ?  What  god  has  taken  any  care  of 
me  ?  Call  me  an  evil  demon — call  me  so !  But  if 
Petrus  and  your  Paulus  there  say  that  he  who  is  up 
above  us  and  who  let  me  grow  up  to  such  a  lot  is 
good,  they  tell  a  lie.  God  is  cruel,  and  it  is  just  like 
Him  to  put  it  into  your  heart  to  throw  stones  and 
scare  me  away  from  your  well." 

With  these  words  she  burst  out  into  bitter  sobs, 


2O  HOMO   SUM. 

and  her  features  worked  with  various  and  passionate 
distortion. 

Hermas  felt  compassion  for  the  weeping  Miriam. 
He  had  met  her  a  hundred  times  and  she  had  shown 
herself,  now  haughty,  now  discontented,  now  exact- 
ing, and  now  wrathful,  but  never  before,  soft  or  sad. 
To-day,  for  the  first  time,  she  had  opened  her  heart 
to  him ;  the  tears  which  disfigured  her  countenance 
gave  her  character  a  value  which  it  had  never  before 
had  in  his  eyes,  and  when  he  saw  her  weak  and  un- 
happy he  felt  ashamed  of  his  hardness.  He  went  up 
to  her  kindly  and  said, — 

"  You  need  not  cry ;  come  to  the  well  again  always, 
I  will  not  prevent  you." 

His  deep  voice  sounded  soft  and  kind  as  he  spoke, 
but  she  sobbed  more  passionately  than  before,  almost 
convulsively,  and  she  tried  to  speak  but  she  could 
not.  Trembling  in  every  slender  limb,  shaken  with 
grief,  and  overwhelmed  with  sorrow,  the  slight  shep- 
herdess stood  before  him,  and  he  felt  as  if  he  must 
help  her.  His  passionate  pity  cut  him  to  the  heart 
and  fettered  his  by  no  means  ready  tongue. 

As  he  could  find  no  word  of  comfort,  he  took  the 
water-gourd  in  his  left  hand  and  laid  his  right,  in 
which  he  had  hitherto  held  it,  gently  on  her  shoulder. 
She  started,  but  she  let  him  do  it ;  he  felt  her  warm 
breath ;  he  would  have  drawn  back,  but  he  felt  as  if 
he  could  not ;  he  hardly  knew  whether  she  were  cry- 
ing or  laughing  while  she  let  his  hand  rest  on  her 
black,  waving  hair. 

She  did  not  move.    At  last  she  raised  her  head 


HOMO  SUM.  21 

her  eyes  flashed  into  his,  and  at  the  same  instant  he 
felt  two  slender  arms  clasped  round  his  neck.  He 
felt  as  if  a  sea  were  roaring  in  his  ears,  and  fire  blaz- 
ing in  his  eyes.  A  nameless  anguish  seized  him; 
he  tore  himself  violently  free,  and  with  a  loud  cry 
as  if  all  the  spirits  of  hell  were  after  him,  he  fled  up 
the  steps  that  led  from  the  well,  and  heeded  not  that 
his  water-jar  was  shattered  into  a  thousand  pieces 
against  the  rocky  wrall. 

She  stood  looking  after  him  as  if  spell-bound. 
Then  she  struck  her  slender  hand  against  her  fore- 
head, threw  herself  down  by  the  spring  again,  and 
stared  into  space  ;  there  she  lay  motionless,  only  her 
mouth  continued  to  twitch. 

When  the  shadow  of  the  palm-tree  grew  longer 
she  sprang  up,  called  her  goats  and  looked  up,  listen- 
ing, to  the  rock-steps  by  which  he  had  vanished ; 
the  twilight  is  short  in  the  neighborhood  of  the 
tropics,  and  she  knew  that  she  would  be  overtaken 
by  the  darkness  on  the  stony  and  fissured  road  down 
the  valley  if  she  lingered  any  longer.  She  feared 
the  terrors  of  the  night,  the  spirits  and  demons,  and 
a  thousand  vague  dangers  whose  nature  she  could 
not  have  explained  even  to  herself ;  and  yet  she  did 
not  stir  from  the  spot  nor  cease  listening  and  wait- 
ing for  his  return  till  the  sun  had  disappeared  behind 
the  sacred  mountain,  and  the  glow  in  the  west  had 
paled. 

All  around  was  as  still  as  death,  she  could  hear 
herself  breathe,  and  as  the  evening  chill  fell  she 
shuddered  with  cold. 


22  HOMO  SUM. 

She  now  heard  a  loud  noise  above  her  head.  A 
flock  of  wild  mountain  goats,  accustomed  to  come  at 
this  hour  to  quench  their  thirst  at  the  spring,  came 
nearer  and  nearer,  but  drew  back  as  they  detected 
the  presence  of  a  human  being.  Only  the  leader  of 
the  herd  remained  standing  on  the  brink  of  the 
ravine,  and  she  knew  that  he  was  only  awaiting  her 
departure  to  lead  the  others  down  to  drink.  Follow- 
ing a  kindly  impulse,  she  was  on  the  point  of  leav- 
ing to  make  way  for  the  animals,  when  she  suddenly 
recollected  Hermas's  threat  to  drive  her  from  the 
well,  and  she  angrily  picked  up  a  stone  and  flung  it 
at  the  buck,  which  started  and  hastily  fled.  The 
whole  herd  followed  him.  Miriam  listened  to 
them  as  they  scuttered  away,  and  then,  with  her  head 
sunk,  she  led  her  flock  home,  feeling  her  way  in  the 
darkness  with  her  bare  feet. 


HOMO  SUM.  23 


CHAPTER  II. 

HIGH  above  the  ravine  where  the  spring  was  lay 
a  level  plateau  of  moderate  extent,  and  behind  it 
rose  a  fissured  cliff  of  bare,  red-brown  porphyry.  A 
vein  of  diorite  of  iron-hardness  lay  at  its  foot  like  a 
green  ribbon,  and  below  this  there  opened  a  small 
round  cavern,  hollowed  and  arched  by  the  cunning 
hand  of  nature.  In  former  times  wild  beasts,  pan- 
thers or  wolves,  had  made  it  their  home ;  it  now 
served  as  a  dwelling  for  young  Hermas  and  his 
father. 

Many  similar  caves  were  to  be  found  in  the  holy 
mountain,  and  other  anchorites  had  taken  possession 
of  the  larger  ones  among  them. 

That  of  Stephanus  was  exceptionally  high  and 
deep,  and  yet  the  space  was  but  small  which  divided 
the  two  beds  of  dried  mountain  herbs  where,  on  one 
slept  the  father,  and,  on  the  other,  the  son. 

It  was  long  past  midnight,  but  neither  the  younger 
nor  the  elder  cave-dweller  seemed  to  be  sleeping. 
Hermas  groaned  aloud  and  threw  himself  vehe- 
mently from  one  side  to  the  other  without  any  consid- 
eration for  the  old  man  who,  tormented  with  pain  and 
weakness,  sorely  needed  sleep.  Stephanus,  mean- 
while denied  himself  the  relief  of  turning  over  or 


24  HOMO   SUM. 

sighing,  when  he  thought  he  perceived  that  his 
more  vigorous  son  had  found  rest. 

"  What  could  have  robbed  him  of  his  rest,  the  boy 
who  usually  slept  so  soundly,  and  was  so  hard  to 
waken  ? " 

"  Whence  comes  it,"  thought  Stephanus,  "  that 
the  young  and  strong  sleep  so  soundly  and  so  much, 
and  the  old,  who  need  rest,  and  even  the  sick,  sleep 
so  lightly  and  so  little.  Is  it  that  wakefulness  may 
prolong  the  little  term  of  life,  of  which  they  dread 
the  end  ?  How  is  it  that  man  clings  so  fondly  to 
this  miserable  existence,  and  would  fain  slink  away 
and  hide  himself  when  the  Angel  calls  and  the  golden 
gates  open  before  him !  We  are  like  Saul,  the  He- 
brew, who  hid  himself  when  they  came  to  him  with 
the  crown !  My  wound  burns  painfully ;  if  only  I 
had  a  drink  of  water.  If  the  poor  child  were  not  so 
sound  asleep  I  might  ask  him  for  the  jar." 

Stephanus  listened  to  his  son  and  would  not  wake 
him,  when  he  heard  his  heavy  and  regular  breathing. 
He  curled  himself  up  shivering  under  the  sheep-skin 
which  covered  only  half  his  body,  for  the  icy  night- 
wind  now  blew  through  the  opening  of  the  cave, 
which  by  day  was  as  hot  as  an  oven. 

Some  long  minutes  wore  away  ;  at  last  he  thought 
he  perceived  that  Hernias  had  raised  himself.  Yes, 
the  sleeper  must  have  wakened,  for  he  began  to 
speak,  and  to  call  on  the  name  of  God. 

The  old  man  turned  to  his  son  and  began  softly, 
"  Do  you  hear  me,  my  boy  ? " 

"  I  cannot  sleep,"  answered  the  youth. 


HOMO  SUM.  25 

"  Then  give  me  something  to  drink,"  asked  Steph- 
anus,  "  my  wound  burns  intolerably." 

Hermas  rose  at  once,  and  reached  the  water-jar 
to  the  sufferer. 

"  Thanks,  thanks,  my  child,"  said  the  old  man, 
feeling  for  the  neck  of  the  jar.  But  he  could  not 
find  it,  and  exclaimed  with  surprise, 

"  How  damp  and  cold  it  is — this  is  clay,  and  our 
jar  was  a  gourd." 

"  I  have  broken  it,"  interrupted  Hermas,  "  and 
Paulus  lent  me  his." 

"  "Well,  well,"  said  Stephanus  anxious  for  drink ; 
he  gave  the  jar  back  to  his  son,  and  waited  till  he 
had  stretched  himself  again  on  his  couch.  Then  he 
asked  anxiously, 

"  You  were  out  a  long  time  this  evening,  the  gourd 
is  broken,  and  you  groaned  in  your  sleep.  Whom  did 
you  meet  ? " 

"  A  demon  of  hell,"  answered  Hermas.  "  And 
now  the  fiend  pursues  me  into  our  cave,  and  tor- 
ments me  in  a  variety  of  shapes." 

"  Drive  it  out  then  and  pray,"  said  the  old  man 
gravely.  "Unclean  spirits  flee  at  the  name  of 
God." 

"  I  have  called  upon  Him,"  sighed  Hermas,  "  but 
in  vain ;  I  see  women  with  ruddy  lips  and  flowing 
hair,  and  white  marble  figures  with  rounded  limbs 
and  flashing  eyes  beckon  to  me  again  and  again." 

"  Then  take  the  scourge,"  ordered  the  father, "  and 
so  win  peace." 

Hermas  once  more  obediently  rose,  and  went  out 


26  HOMO  SUM. 

into  the  air  with  the  scourge ;  the  narrow  limits  of 
the  cave  did  not  admit  of  his  swinging  it  with  all 
the  strength  of  his  arms. 

Yery  soon  Stephanus  heard  the  whistle  of  the 
leathern  thongs  through  the  stillness  of  the  night, 
their  hard  blows  on  the  springy  muscles  of  the  man 
and  his  son's  painful  groaning. 

At  each  blow  the  old  man  shrank  as  if  it  had  fallen 
on  himself.  At  last  he  cried  as  loud  as  he  was  able  : 
"  Enough — that  is  enough." 

Hermas  came  back  into  the  cave,  his  father  called 
him  to  his  couch,  and  desired  him  to  join  with  him  in 
prayer. 

After  the  "  Amen  "  he  stroked  the  lad's  abundant 
hair  and  said,  "  Since  you  went  to  Alexandria,  you 
have  been  quite  another  being.  I  would  I  had  with- 
stood Bishop  Agapitus,  and  forbidden  you  the  jour- 
ney. Soon,  I  know,  my  Saviour  will  call  me  to  him- 
self, and  no  one  will  keep  you  here ;  then  the  temp- 
ter will  come  to  you,  and  all  the  splendors  of 
the  great  city,  which  after  all  only  shine  like  rotten 
wood,  like  shining  snakes  and  poisonous  purple-ber- 
ries— 

"  I  do  not  care  for  them,' '  interrupted  Hermas, 
"the  noisy  place  bewildered  and  frightened  me. 
Never,  never  will  I  tread  the  spot  again." 

"  So  you  have  always  said,"  replied  Stephanus, "  and 
yet  the  journey  quite  altered  you.  How  often  be- 
fore that  I  used  to  think  when  I  heard  you  laugh 
that  the  sound  must  surely  please  our  Father  in 
Heaven.  And  now  ?  You  used  to  be  like  a  singing 


HOMO   SUM.  27 

bird,  and  now  you  go  about  silent,  you  look  sour  and 
morose,  and  evil  thoughts  trouble  your  sleep." 

"  That  is  my  loss,"  answered  Hermas.     "  Pray  let 
go  of  my  hand  ;  the  night  will  soon  be  past,  and 
you  have  the  whole  live-long  clay  to  lecture  me  in." 
Stephanus  sighed,  and  Hermas  returned  to  his 
couch. 

Sleep  avoided  them  both,  and  each  knew  that  the 
other  was  awake,  and  would  willingly  have  spoken 
to  him,  but  dissatisfaction  and  defiance  closed  the 
son's  lips,  and  the  father  was  silent  because  he  could 
not  find  exactly  the  heart-searching  words  that  he 
was  seeking. 

At  last  it  was  morning,  a  twilight  glimmer  struck 
through  the  opening  of  the  cave,  and  it  grew  lighter 
and  lighter  in  the  gloomy  vault ;  the  boy  awoke  and 
rose  yawning.  When  he  saw  his  father  lying  with 
his  eyes  open,  he  asked  indifferently,  "  Shall  I  stay 
here  or  go  to  morning  worship  ?  " 

"  Let  us  pray  here  together,"  begged  the  father. 
"  "Who  knows  how  long  it  may  yet  be  granted  to  us 
to  do  so.  I  am  not  far  from  the  day  that  no  evening 
ever  closes.  Kneel  down  here,  and  let  me  kiss  the 
image  of  the  Crucified." 

Hermas  did  as  his  father  desired  him,  and  as  they 
were  ending  their  song  of  praise,  a  third  voice  joined 
in  the  "  Amen." 

"  Paulus ! "  cried  the  old  man.  "  The  Lord  be 
praised !  pray  look  to  my  wound  then.  The  arrow 
head  seeks  to  work  some  way  out,  and  it  burns  fear- 
fully." 


28  HOMO  SUM. 

The  new-comer,  an  anchorite,  who  for  all  clothing 
wore  a  shirt-shaped  coat  of  brown  undressed  linen, 
and  a  sheep-skin,  examined  the  wound  carefully,  and 
laid  some  herbs  on  it,  murmuring  meanwhile  some 
pious  texts. 

"  That  is  much  easier,"  sighed  the  old  man. 
"The  Lord  has  mercy  on  me  for  your  goodness' 
sake." 

"  My  goodness  ?  I  am  a  vessel  .of  wrath,"  replied 
Paul  us,  with  a  deep,  rich,  sonorous  voice,  and  his 
peculiarly  kind  blue  eyes  were  raised  to  heaven  as 
if  to  attest  how  greatly  men  were  deceived  in  him. 
Then  he  pushed  the  bushy  grizzled  hair,  which  hung 
in  disorder  over  his  neck  and  face,  out  of  his  eyes, 
and  said  cheerfully, 

"  No  man  is  more  than  man,  and  many  men  are 
less.  In  the  ark  there  were  many  beasts,  but  only 
one  Noah." 

"  You  are  the  Noah  of  our  little  ark,"  replied 
Stephanus. 

"  Then  this  great  lout  here  is  the  elephant," 
laughed  Paul  us. 

"  You  are  no  smaller  than  he,"  replied  Stephanus. 

"  It  is  a  pity  this  stone  roof  is  so  low,  else  we 
might  have  measured  ourselves,"  said  Paulus. 
"  Aye  !  if  Hermas  and  I  were  as  pious  and  pure  as 
we  are  tall  and  strong,  we  should  both  have  the  key 
of  Paradise  in  our  pockets.  You  were  scourging 
yourself  this  night,  boy  ;  I  heard  the  blows.  It  is 
well ;  if  the  sinful  flesh  revolts,  thus  we  may  sub- 
due it." 


HOMO   SUM.  29 

"  He  groaned  heavily  and  could  not  sleep,"  said 
Stephanus. 

"  Aye,  did  he  indeed !  "  cried  Paulus  to  the  youth, 
and  held  his  powerful  arms  out  towards  him  with 
clenched  fists ;  but  the  threatening  voice  was  loud 
rather  than  terrible,  and  wild  as  the  exceptionally 
big  man  looked  in  his  sheep-skin,  there  was  such 
irresistible  kindliness  in  his  gaze  and  in  his  voice, 
that  no  one  could  have  believed  that  his  wrath  was 
in  earnest. 

"  Fiends  of  hell  had  met  him,"  said  Stephanus  in 
excuse  for  his  son,  "and  I  should  not  have  closed 
an  eye  even  without  his  groaning ;  it  is  the  fifth 
night." 

"  But  in  the  sixth,"  said  Paulus,  "  sleep  is  abso- 
lutely necessary.  Put  on  your  sheep-skin,  Hennas ; 
you  must  go  down  to  the  oasis  to  the  Senator  Petrus, 
and  fetch  a  good  sleeping-draught  for  our  sick  man 
from  him  or  from  Dame  Dorothea,  the  deaconess. 
Just  look !  the  youngster  has  really  thought  of  his 
father's  breakfast — one's  own  stomach  is  a  good  re- 
minder. Only  put  the  bread  and  the  water  down 
here  by  the  couch  ;  while  you  are  gone  I  will  fetch 
some  fresh — now,  come  with  me." 

"  Wait  a  minute,  wait,"  cried  Stephanus.  "  Bring 
a  new  jar  with  you  from  the  town,  my  son.  You 
lent  us  yours  yesterday,  Paulus,  and  I  must — " 

"  I  should  soon  have  forgotten  it,"  interrupted  the 
other.  "  I  have  to  thank  the  careless  fellow,  for  I 
have  now  for  the  first  time  discovered  the  right  way 
to  drink,  and  as  long  as  one  is  well  and  able.  I 


3<D  HOMO   SUM. 

would  not  have  the  jar  back  for  a  measure  of  gold ; 
water  has  no  relish  unless  you  drink  it  out  of  the 
hollow  of  your  hand !  The  shard  is  yours.  I  should 
be  warring  against  my  own  welfare,  if  I  required  it 
back.  God  be  praised !  the  craftiest  thief  can  now 
rob  me  of  nothing  save  my  sheep-skin." 

Stephanus  would  have  thanked  him,  but  he  took 
Hernias  by  the  hand,  and  led  him.  out  into  the  open. 

For  some  time  the  two  men  walked  in  silence 
over  the  clefts  and  boulders  up  the  mountain  side. 
When  they  had  reached  a  plateau,  which  lay  on  the 
road  that  led  from  the  sea  over  the  mountain  into 
the  oasis,  he  turned  to  the  youth,  and  said, 

"  If  we  always  considered  all  the  results  of  our 
actions  there  would  be  no  sins  committed." 

Hernias  looked  at  him  inquiringly,  and  Paulus 
went  on, 

"  If  it  had  occurred  to  you  to  think  how  sorely 
your  poor  father  needed  sleep,  you  would  have  lain 
still  this  night." 

"  I  could  not,"  said  the  youth  sullenly.  "  And 
you  know  very  well  that  I  scourged  myself  hardly 
enough." 

"  That  was  quite  right,  for  you  deserved  a  flogging 
for  a  misconducted  boy." 

Hermas  look  defiantly  at  his  reproving  friend,  the 
flaming  color  mounted  to  his  cheek :  for  he  re- 
membered the  shepherdess's  words  that  he  might 
go  and  complain  to  his  nurse,  and  he  cried  out 
angrily, 


HOMO,  SUM.  31 

"  I  will  not  let  any  one  speak  to  me  so ;  I  am  no 
longer  a  child." 

"  JSTot  even  your  father's  ? "  asked  Paulus,  and  he 
looked  at  the  boy  with  such  an  astonished  and  in- 
quiring air,  that  Hermas  turned  away  his  eyes  in 
confusion. 

"  It  is  not  right  at  any  rate  to  trouble  the  last 
remnant  of  life  of  that  very  man  who  longs  to  live 
for  your  sake  only." 

"  I  should  have  been  very  willing  to  lie  still,  for  I 
love  my  father  as  well  as  any  one  else." 

"  You  do  not  beat  him,"  replied  Paulus,  "  you 
carry  him  bread  and  water,  and  do  not  drink  up  the 
wine  yourself,  which  the  Bishop  sends  him  home 
from  the  Lord's  supper ;  that  is  something  certainly, 
but  not  enough  by  a  long  way." 

"  I  am  no  saint ! " 

"  Nor  I  neither,"  exclaimed  Paulus,  "  I  am  full  of 
sin  and  weakness.  Bur  I  know  what  the  love  is 
which  was  taught  us  by  the  Saviour,  and  that  you 
too  may  know.  He  suffered  on  the  cross  for  you, 
and  for  me,  and  for  all  the  poor  and  the  vile.  Love 
is  at  once  the  easiest  and  the  most  difficult  of  attain- 
ments. It  requires  sacrifice.  And  you  ?  How  long 
is  it  now  since  you  last  showed  your  father  a  cheer- 
ful countenance  ? " 

"  I  cannot  be  a  hypocrite." 

"  Nor  need  you,  but  you  must  love.  Certainly  it 
is  not  by  what  his  hand  does  but  by  what  his  heart 
cheerfully  offers,  and  by  what  he  forces  himself  to 
give  up  that  a  man  proves  his  love." 


32  HOMO   SUM. 

"  And  is  it  no  sacrifice  that  I  waste  all  my  youth 
here  ?  "  asked  the  boy. 

Paulus  stepped  back  from  him  a  little  way,  shook 
his  matted  head,  and  said,  "  Is  that  it  ?  You  are 
thinking  of  Alexandria!  Ay!  no  doubt  life  runs 
away  much  quicker  there  than  on  our  solitary  mount- 
ain. You  do  not  fancy  the  tawny  shepherd  girl, 
but  perhaps  some  pretty  pink  and  white  Greek 
maiden  down  there  has  looked  into  your  eyes  ? " 

"  Let  me  alone  about  the  women,"  answered 
Hermas,  with  genuine  annoyance.  "  There  are  other 
things  to  look  at  there." 

The  youth's  eyes  sparkled  as  he  spoke,  and  Paulus 
asked., not  without  interest,  "  Indeed?" 

"  You  know  Alexandria  better  than  I,"  answered 
Hermas  evasively.  "  You  were  born  there,  and 
they  say  you  had  been  a  rich  young  man." 

"  Do  they  say  so  ? "  said  Paulus.  "  Perhaps  they 
are  right ;  but  you  must  know  that  I  am  glad  that 
nothing  any  longer  belongs  to  me  of  all  the  vanities 
that  I  possessed,  and  I  thank  my  Saviour  that  I  can 
now  turn  my  back  on  the  turmoil  of  men.  What 
was  it  that  seemed  to  you  so  particularly  tempting 
in  all  that  whirl  ?  " 

Hermas  hesitated.  He  feared  to  speak,  and  yet 
something  urged  and  drove  him  to  say  out  all  that 
was  stirring  his  soul !  If  any  one  of  all  those  grave 
men  who  despised  the  world  and  among  whom  he 
had  grown  up,  could  ever  understand  him,  he  knew 
well  that  it  would  be  Paulus  ;  Paulus  whose  rough 
beard  he  had  pulled  when  he  was  little,  on  whose 


HOMO  SUM.  33 

shoulders  he  had  often  sat,  and  who  had  proved  to 
him  a  thousand  times  how  truly  he  loved  him.  It 
is  true  the  Alexandrian  was  the  severest  of  them  all, 
but  he  was  harsh  only  to  himself.  Hermas  must 
once  for  all  unburden  his  heart,  and  with  sudden 
decision  he  asked  the  anchorite, 

"  Did  you  often  visit  the  baths  ?  " 

"  Often  ?  I  only  wonder  that  I  did  not  melt 
away  and  fall  to  pieces  in  the  warm  water  like  a 
wheaten  loaf." 

"  Why  do  you  laugh  at  that  which  makes  men 
beautiful  ? "  cried  Hermas  hastily.  "  Why  may 
Christians  even  visit  the  baths  in  Alexandria,  while 
we  up  here,  you  and  my  father  and  all  anchorites, 
only  use  water  to  quench  our  thirst.  You  compel 
me  to  live  like  one  of  you,  and  I  do  not  like  being  a 
dirty  beast." 

"  None  can  see  us  but  the  Most  High,"  answered 
Faulus,  "  and  for  him  we  cleanse  and  beautify  our 
souls." 

"  But  the  Lord  gave  us  our  body  too,"  interrupted 
Hermas.  "  It  is  written  that  man  is  the  image  of 
God.  And  we !  I  appeared  to  myself  as  repulsive 
as  a  hideous  ape  when  at  the  great  baths  by  the 
Gate  of  the  Sun  I  saw  the  youths  and  men  with 
beautifully  arranged  and  scented  hair  and  smooth 
limbs  that  shone  with  cleanliness  and  purification. 
And  as  they  went  past,  and  I  looked  at  my  mangy 
sheepfell,  and  thought  of  my  wild  mane  and  my 
arms  and  feet,  which  are  no  worse  formed  or  weaker 
than  theirs  were,  I  turned  hot  and  cold,  and  I  felt 
3 


34  HOMO   SUM. 

as  if  some  bitter  drink  were  choking  me.  I  should 
have  liked  to  howl  out  with  shame  and  envy  and 
vexation.  I  will  not  be  like  a  monster  ! " 

Hermas  ground  his  teeth  as  he  spoke  the  last 
words,  and  Paulus  looked  uneasily  at  him  as  he 
went  on, 

"  My  body  is  God's  as  much  as  my  soul  is,  and 
what  is  allowed  to  the  Christians  in  the  city — " 

"  That  we  nevertheless  may  not  do,"  Paulus  in- 
terrupted gravely.  "  He  who  has  once  devoted 
himself  to  Heaven  must  detach  himself  wholly  from 
the  charm  of  life,  and  break  one  tie  after  another 
that  binds  him  to  the  dust.  I  too  once  upon  a  time 
have  anointed  this  body,  and  smoothed  this  rough 
hair,  and  rejoiced  sincerely  over  my  mirror  ;  but  I 
say  to  you,  Hermas — and,  by  my  dear  Saviour,  I 
say  it  only  because  I  feel  it,  deep  in  my  heart  I  feel 
it — to  pray  is  better  than  to  bathe,  and  I,  a  poor 
wretch,  have  been  favored  with  hours  in  which  my 
spirit  has  struggled  free,  and  has  been  permitted 
to  share  as  an  honored  guest  in  the  festal  joys  of 
Heaven !  " 

While  he  spoke,  his  wide  open  eyes  had  turned 
towards  Heaven  and  had  acquired  a  wondrous 
brightness. 

For  a  short  time  the  two  stood  opposite  each 
other  silent  and  motionless ;  at  last  the  anchorite 
pushed  the  hair  from  off  his  brow,  which  was  now 
for  the  first  time  visible.  It  was  well-formed, 
though  somewhat  narrow,  and  its  clear  fairness 
formed  a  sharp  contrast  to  his  sunburnt  face. 


HOMO  SUM.  35 

"  Boy,"  he  said  with  a  deep  breath,  "  you  know 
not  what  joys  you  would  sacrifice  for  the  sake  of 
worthless  things.  Long  ere  the  Lord  calls  the  pious 
man  to  Heaven,  the  pious  has  brought  Heaven 
down  to  earth  in  himself." 

Hermas  well  understood  what  the  anchorite 
meant,  for  his  father  often  for  hours  at  a.  time 
gazed  up  into  Heaven  in  prayer,  neither  seeing  nor 
hearing  what  was  going  on  around  him,  and  was 
wont  to  relate  to  his  son,  when  he  awoke  from  his 
ecstatic  vision,  that  he  had  seen  the  Lord  or  heard 
the  angel-choir. 

He  himself  had  never  succeeded  in  bringing  him- 
self into  such  a  state,  although  Stephanus  had  often 
compelled  him  to  remain  on  his  knees  praying  with 
him  for  many  interminable  hours.  It  often  hap- 
pened that  the  old  man's  feeble  flame  of  life  had 
threatened  to  become  altogether  extinct  after  these 
deeply  soul-stirring  exercises,  and  Hermas  would 
gladly  have  forbidden  him  giving  himself  up  to 
such  hurtful  emotions,  for  he  loved  his  father  ;  but 
they  were  looked  upon  as  special  manifestations  of 
grace,  and  how  should  a  son  dare  to  express  his 
aversion  to  such  peculiarly  sacred  acts  ?  But  to 
Paulus  and  in  his  present  mood  he  found  courage  to 
speak  out. 

"I  have  sure  hope  of  Paradise,"  he  said,  "but 
it  will  be  first  opened  to  us  after  death.  The 
Christian  should  be  patient ;  why  can  you  not  wait 
for  Heaven  till  the  Saviour  calls  you,  instead  of  de- 
siring to  enjoy  its  pleasures  here  on  earth  ?  This 


36  HOMO   SUM. 

first  and  that  after!  "Why  should  God  have  be- 
stowed on  us  the  gifts  of  the  flesh  if  not  that  we  may 
use  them  ?  Beauty  and  strength  are  not  empty 
trifles,  and  none  but  a  fool  gives  noble  gifts  to  an- 
other, only  in  order  to  throw  them  away." 

Paulus  gazed  in  astonishment  at  the  youth,  who  up 
to  this  moment  had  always  unresistingly  obeyed  his 
father  and  him,  and  he  shook  his  head  as  he  an- 
swered, 

"  So  think  the  children  of  this  world  who  stand 
far  from  the  Most  High.  In  the  image  of  God  are 
we  made  no  doubt,  but  what  child  would  kiss  the 
image  of  his  father,  when  the  father  offers  him  his 
own  living  lips  ? " 

Paulus  had  meant  to  say  "  mother "  instead  of 
"  father,"  but  he  remembered  in  time  that  Hermas 
had  early  lost  the  happiness  of  caressing  a  mother, 
and  he  had  hastily  amended  the  phrase.  He  was 
one  of  those  to  whom  it  is  so  painful  to  hurt  an- 
other, that  they  never  touch  a  wounded  soul  unless 
to  heal  it,  divining  the  seat  of  even  the  most  hidden 
pain. 

He  was  accustomed  to  speak  but  little,  but  now 
he  went  on  eagerly, 

"  By  so  much  as  God  is  far  above  our  miserable 
selves,  by  so  much  is  the  contemplation  of  Him 
worthier  of  the  Christian  than  that  of  his  own  per- 
son. Oh !  who  is  indeed  so  happy  as  to  have  wholly 
lost  that  self  and  to  be  perfectly  absorbed  in  God  ! 
But  it  pursues  us,  and  when  the  soul  fondly  thinks 
itself  already  blended  in  union  with  the  Most  High 


HOMO   SUM.  37 

it  cries  out '  Here  am  I ! '  and  drags  our  nobler  part 
down  again  into  the  dust.  It  is  bad  enough  that 
we  must  hinder  the  flight  of  the  soul,  and  are  forced 
to  nourish  and  strengthen  the  perishable  part  of  our 
being  with  bread  and  water  and  slothful  sleep  to  the 
injury  of  the  immortal  part,  however  much  we  may 
fast  and  watch.  And  shall  we  indulge  the  flesh,  to 
the  detriment  of  the  spirit,  by  granting  it  any  of  its 
demands  that  can  easily  be  denied  ?  Only  he  who 
despises  and  sacrifices  his  wretched  self  can,  when 
he  has  lost  his  baser  self,  by  the  Redeemer's  grace, 
find  himself  again  in  God." 

Hermas  had  listened  patiently  to  the  anchorite, 
but  he  now  shook  his  head,  and  said, 

"  I  cannot  understand  either  you  or  my  father. 
So  long  as  I  walk  on  this  earth,  I  am  /and  no  other. 
After  death,  no  doubt,  but  not  till  then,  will  a  new 
and  eternal  life  begin." 

"  Not  so,"  cried  Paulus  hastily,  interrupting  him. 
"  That  other  and  higher  life  of  which  you  speak, 
does  not  begin  only  after  death  for  him  who  wihle 
yet  he  lives  does  not  cease  from  dying,  from  morti- 
fying the  flesh,  and  from  subduing  its  lusts,  from 
casting  from  him  the  world  and  his  baser  self,  and 
from  seeking  the  Lord.  It  has  been  vouchsafed  to 
many  even  in  the  midst  of  life  to  be  born  again  to  a 
higher  existence.  Look  at  me,  the  basest  of  the 
base.  I  am  not  two  but  one,  and  yet  am.  I  in  the 
sight  of  the  Lord  as  certainly  another  man  than  I 
was  before  grace  found  me,  and  this  young  shoot, 
which  has  grown  from  the  roots  of  an  overthrown 


38  HOMO  SUM. 

palm-tree  is  another  tree  than  the  rotten  trunk.  I 
was  a  heathen  and  enjoyed  every  pleasure  of  the 
earth  to  the  utmost ;  then  I  became  a  Christian ;  the 
grace  of  the  Lord  fell  upon  me,  .and  I  was  born 
again,  and  became  a  child  again,  but  this  time — the 
Redeemer  be  praised  1 — the  child  of  the  Lord.  In 
the  midst  of  life  I  died,  I  rose  again,  I  found  the 
joys  of  Heaven.  I  had  been  Menander,  and  like 
unto  Saul,  I  became  Paulus.  All  that  Menander 
loved — baths,  feats,  theatres,  horses  and  chariots, 
games  in  the  arena,  anointed  limbs,  roses  and  gar- 
lands, purple-garments,  wine  and  the  love  of  women 
— lie  behind  me  like  some  foul  bog  out  of  which  a 
traveller  has  struggled  with  difficulty.  JSTot  a  vein 
of  the  old  man  survives  in  the  new,  and  a  new  life 
has  begun  for  me,  midway  to  the  grave ;  nor  for 
me  only,  but  for  all  pious  men.  For  you  too  the  hour 
will  sound,  in  which  you  will  die  to — " 

"  If  only  I,  like  you,  had  been  a  Menander,"  cried 
Hernias,  sharply  interrupting  the  speaker.  "How 
is  it  possible  to  cast  away  that  which  I  never  pos- 
sessed ?  In  order  to  die  one  first  must  live.  This 
wretched  life  seems  to  me  contemptible,  and  I  am 
weary  of  running  after  you  like  a  calf  after  a  cow. 
I  am  free-born,  and  of  noble  race,  my  father  himself 
has  told  me  so,  and  I  am  certainly  no  feebler  in  body 
than  the  citizens'  sons  in  the  town  with  whom  I 
went  from  the  baths  to  the  wrestling-school." 

"  Did  you  go  to  the  Palestra  ?  "•  asked  Paulus  in 
surprise. 

"To  the  wrestling-school  of  Timagetus,"  cried 


HOMO  SUM.  39 

Hermas,  coloring.  "From  outside  the  gate  I 
watched  the  games  of  the  youths  as  they  wrestled, 
and  threw  heavy  disks  at  a  mark.  My  eyes  almost 
sprang  out  of  my  head  at  the  sight,  and  I  could 
have  cried  out  aloud  with  envy  and  vexation,  at  hav- 
ing to  stand  there  in  my  ragged  sheep-skin  excluded 
from  all  competition.  If  Pachomius  had  not  just 
then  come  up,  by  the  Lord  I  must  have  sprung  into 
the  arena,  and  have  challenged  the  strongest  of  them 
all  to  wrestle  with  me,  and  I  could  have  thrown  the 
disk  much  farther  than  the  scented  puppy  who  won 
the  victory  and  was  crowned." 

"  You  may  thank  Pachomius,"  said  Paulus  laugh- 
ing, "  for  having  hindered  you,  for  you  would  have 
earned  nothing  in  the  arena  but  mockery  and  dis- 
grace. You  are  strong  enough,  certainly,  but  the 
art  of  the  discobolus  must  be  learned  like  any 
other.  Hercules  himself  would  be  beaten  at  that 
game  without  practice,  and  if  he  did  not  know  the 
right  way  to  handle  the  disk." 

"  It  would  not  have  been  the  first  time  I  had 
thrown  one,"  cried  the  boy.  "  See,  what  I  can  do ! " 
With  these  words  he  stooped  and  raised  one  of  the 
flat  stones,  which  lay  piled  up  to  secure  the  path- 
way ;  extending  his  arm  with  all  his  strength,  he 
flung  the  granite  disk  over  the  precipice  away  into 
the  abyss. 

"  There,  you  see,"  cried  Paulus,  who  had  watched 
the  throw  carefully  and  not  without  some  anxious 
excitement.  "  However  strong  your  arm  may  be, 
any  novice  could  throw  farther  than  you  if  only  he 


40  HOMO   SUM. 

knew  the  art  of  holding  the  discus.  It  is  not  so— 
not  so  ;  it  must  cut  through  the  air  like  a  knife  with 
its  sharp  edge.  Look  how  you  hold  your  hand,  you 
throw  like  a  woman  !  The  wrist  straight,  and  now 
your  left  foot  behind,  and  your  knee  bent !  see,  how 
clumsy  you  are !  Here,  give  me  the  stone.  You 
take  the  discus  so,  then  you  bend  your  body,  and 
press  down  your  knees  like  the  arc  of  a  bow,  so  that 
every  sinew  in  your  body  helps  to  speed  the  shot 
when  you  let  go.  Aye — that  is  better,  but  it  is  not 
quite  right  yet.  First  heave  the  discus  with  your 
arm  stretched  out,  then  fix  your  eye  on  the  mark ; 
now  swing  it  out  high  behind  you — stop !  once 
more!  your  arm  must  be  more  strongly  strained 
before  you  throw.  That  might  pass,  but  you  ought 
to  be  able  to  hit  Tthe  palm-tree  yonder.  Give  me 
your  discus,  and  that  stone.  There,  the  unequal 
corners  hinder  its  flight — now  pay  attention ! " 
Paulus  spoke  with  growing  eagerness,  and  now  he 
grasped  the  flat  stone,  as  he  might  have  done  many 
years  since  when  no  youth  in  Alexandria  had  been 
his  match  in  throwing  the  discus. 

He  bent  his  knees,  stretched  out  his  body,  gave 
play  to  his  wrist,  extended  his  arm  to  the  utmost, 
and  hurled  the  stone  into  space,  while  the  clenched 
toes  of  his  right  foot  deeply  dinted  the  soil. 

But  it  fell  to  the  ground  before  reaching  the  palm, 
which  Paulus  had  indicated  as  the  mark. 

"  Wait !  "  cried  Hermas.  "  Let  me  try  now  to  hit 
the  tree." 

His  stone  whistled  through  the  air,  but  it  did  not 


HOMO  SUM.  41 

even  reach  the  mound,  into  which  the  palm-tree  had 
struck  root. 

Paulus  shook  his  head  disapprovingly,  and  in  his 
turn  seized  a  flat  stone ;  and  now  an  eager  contest 
began.  At  every  throw  Hernias'  stone  flew  farther, 
for  he  copied  his  teacher's  action  and  grasp  with  in- 
creasing skill,  while  the  old  man's  arm  began  to  tire. 
At  last  Hennas  for  the  second  time  hit  the  palm- 
tree,  while  Paulus  had  failed  to  reach  even  the 
mound  with  his  last  fling. 

The  pleasure  of  the  contest  took  stronger  posses- 
sion of  the  anchorite;  he  flung  his  raiment  from 
him  and  seizing  another  stone  he  cried  out — as 
though  he  were  standing  once  more  in  the  wrest- 
ling-school among  his  old  companions,  all  shining 
from  their  anointment. 

"  By  the  silver-bowed  Apollo,  and  the  arrow- 
speeding  Artemis,  I  will  hit  the  palm-tree." 

The  missile  sang  through  the  air,  his  body  sprang 
back,  and  he  stretched  out  his  left  arm  to  save  his 
tottering  balance ;  there  was  a  crash,  the  tree 
quivered  under  the  blow,  and  Hermas  shouted 
joyfully, 

"  Wonderful !  wonderful !  that  was  indeed  a  throw. 
The  old  Menander  is  not  dead  !  Farewell — to- 
morrow we  will  try  again." 

"With  these  words  Hermas  quitted  the  anchorite, 
and  hastened  with  wide  leaps  down  the  hill  in  the 
oasis. 

Paulus  started  at  the  words  like  a  sleep-walker 
who  is  suddenly  awakened  by  hearing  his  name 


42  HOMO   SUM. 

called.  He  looked  about  him  in  bewilderment,  as  if 
he  had  to  find  his  way  in  some  strange  world. 
Drops  of  sweat  stood  on  his  brow,  and  with  sudden 
shame  he  snatched  up  his  garments  that  were  lying 
on  the  ground,  and  covered  his  naked  limbs. 

For  some  time  he  stood  gazing  after  Hermas,  then 
he  clasped  his  brow  in  deep  anguish  and  large  tears 
ran  down  upon  his  beard. 

"What  have  I  said?"  he  muttered  to  himself. 
"  That  every  vein  of  the  old  man  in  me  was  extir- 
pated? Fool!  vain  madman  that  I  am.  They 
named  me  Paulus,  and  I  am  in  truth  Saul,  aye,  and 
worse  than  Saul !  " 

With  these  words  he  threw  himself  on  his  knees, 
pressing  his  forehead  against  the  hard  rock,  and  be- 
gan to  pray.  He  felt  as  if  he  had  been  flung  from 
a  height  on  to  spears  and  lances,  as  if  his  heart  and 
soul  were  bleeding  and  while  he  remained  there, 
dissolved  in  grief  and  prayer,  accusing  and  condemn- 
ing himself,  he  felt  not  the  burning  of  the  sun  as  it 
mounted  in  the  sky,  heeded  not  the  flight  of  time, 
nor  heard  the  approach  of  a  party  of  pilgrims,  who, 
under  the  guidance  of  Bishop  Agapitus,  were  visit- 
ing the  Holy  Places. 

The  palmers  saw  him  at  prayer,  heard  his  sobs,  and, 
marvelling  at  his  piety,  at  a  sign  from  their  pastor 
they  knelt  down  behind  him. 

When  Paulus  at  last  rose,  he  perceived  with  sur- 
prise and  alarm  the  witnesses  of  his  devotions,  and 
approached  Agapitus  to  kiss  his  robe.  But  the 
bishop  said, 


HOMO  SUM.  43 

"  Hot  so ;  he  that  is  most  pious  is  the  greatest 
among  us.  My  friends,  let  us  bow  down  before  this 
saintly  man ! " 

The  pilgrims  obeyed  his  command.  Paulus  hid 
his  face  in  his  hands  and  sobbed  out, 

"  "Wretch,  wretch  that  I  am ! " 

And  the  pilgrims  lauded  his  humility,  and  followed 
their  leader  who  left  the  spot. 


44  HOMO  SUM. 


CHAPTER  III. 

HERMAS  had  hastened  onwards  without  delay.  He 
had  already  reached  the  last  bend  of  the  path  he  had 
followed  down  the  ravine,  and  he  saw  at  his  feet  the 
long  narrow  valley  and  the  gleaming  waters  of  the 
stream,  which  here  fertilized  the  soil  of  the  desert. 
He  looked  down  on  lofty  palms  and  tamarisk  shrubs 
innumerable,  among  which  rose  the  houses  of  the.; 
inhabitants,  surrounded  by  their  little  gardens  and 
small,  carefully-irrigated  fields;  already  he  could 
hear  the  crowing  of  the  cock  and  the  hospitable  bark- 
ing of  a  dog,  sounds  which  came  to  him  like  a  wel- 
come from  the  midst  of  that  life  for  which  he  yearned, 
accustomed  as  he  was  to  be  surrounded  day  and  night 
by  the  deep  and  lonely  stillness  of  the  rocky  heights. 

He  stayed  his  steps,  and  his  eyes  followed  the  thin 
columns  of  smoke,  which  floated  tremulously  up  in 
the  clear  light  of  the  ever-mounting  sun  from  the 
numerous  hearths  that  lay  below  him. 

"  They  are  cooking  breakfast  now,"  thought  he, 
"  the  wives  for  their  husbands,  the  mothers  for  their 
children,  and  there,  where  that  dark  smoke  rises, 
very  likely  a  splendid  feast  is  being  prepared  for 
guests ;  but  I  am  nowhere  at  home,  and  no  one  will 
invite  me  in." 


HOMO   SUM.  45 

The  contest  with  Paulus  had  excited  and  cheered 
him,  but  the  sight  of  the  city  filled  his  young  heart 
with  renewed  bitterness,  and  his  lips  trembled  as  he 
looked  down  on  his  sheep-skin  and  his  unwashed 
limbs.  With  hasty  resolve  he  turned  his  back  on  the 
oasis  and  hurried  up  the  mountain.  By  the  side  of 
the  brooklet  that  he  knew  of  he  threw  oif  his  coarse 
garment,  let  the  cool  water  flow  over  his  body, 
washed  himself  carefully  and  with  much  enjoyment, 
stroked  down  his  thick  hair  with  his  fingers,  and 
then  hurried  down  again  into  the  valley. 

The  gorge  through  which  he  had  descended  de- 
bouched by  a  hillock  that  rose  from  the  valley-plain ; 
a  small  newly-built  church  leaned  against  its  east- 
ern declivity,  and  it  was  fortified  on  all  sides  by  walls 
and  dikes,  behind  which  the  citizens  found  shelter 
when  they  were  threatened  by  the  Saracen  robbers 
of  the  oasis.  This  hill  passed  for  a  particularly 
sacred  spot.  Moses  was  supposed  to  have  prayed 
on  its  summit  during  the  battle  with  the  Amalekites 
while  his  arms  were  held  up  by  Aaron  and  Hur. 

But  there  were  other  notable  spots  in  the  neigh- 
borhood of  the  oasis.  There  farther  to  the  north 
was  the  rock  whence  Moses  had  struck  the  water ; 
there  higher  up,  and  more  to  the  southeast,  was  the 
hill  where  the  Lord  had  spoken  to  the  lawgiver  face 
to  face,  and  where  he  had  seen  the  burning  bush ; 
here  again  was  the  spring  where  he  had  met  the 
daughters  of  Jethro,  Zippora  and  Ledja,  so  called  in 
the  legend.  Pious  pilgrims  came  to  these  holy 
places  in  great  numbers,  and  among  them  many  na- 


46  HOMO  SUM. 

tives  of  the  peninsula,  particularly  Nabateans,  who 
had  previously  visited  the  holy  mountain  in  order  to 
sacrifice  on  its  summit  to  their  gods,  the  sun,  moon, 
and  planets.  At  the  outlet,  towards  the  north, 
stood  a  castle,  which  ever  since  the  Syrian  Prefect, 
Cornelius  Palma,  had  subdued  Arabia  Petrsea  in  the 
time  of  Trajan,  had  been  held  by  a  Roman  garrison 
for  the  protection  of  the  blooming  city  of  the  desert 
against  the  incursions  of  the  marauding  Saracens 
and  Blemmyes. 

But  the  citizens  of  Pharan  themselves  had  taken 
measures  for  the  security  of  their  property.  On  the 
topmost  cliffs  of  the  jagged  crown  of  the  giant 
mountain — the  most  favorable  spots  for  a  look-out 
far  and  wide — they  placed  sentinels,  who  day  and 
night  scanned  the  distance,  so  as  to  give  a  warning- 
signal  in  case  of  approaching  danger.  Each  house 
resembled  a  citadel,  for  it  was  built  of  strong  masonry, 
and  the  younger  men  were  all  well-exercised  bow- 
men. The  more  distinguished  families  dwelt  near 
the  church-hill  and  there  too  stood  the  houses  of  the 
Bishop  Agapitus,  and  of  the  city  councillors  of 
Pharan. 

Among  these  the  Senator  Petrus  enjoyed  the 
greatest  respect,  partly  by  reason  of  his  solid  abilities 
and  of  his  possessions  in  quarries,  garden-ground, 
date-palm,  and  cattle  ;  partly  in  consequence  of  the 
rare  qualities  of  his  wife,  the  deaconess  Dorothea,  the 
grand-daughter  of  the  long-deceased  and  venerable 
Bishop  Chaeremon,  who  had  fled  hither  with  his  wife 
during  the  persecution  of  the  Christians  under  Decius, 


HOMO   SUM.  47 

and  who  had  converted  many  of  the  Pharanites  to 
the  knowledge  of  the  Redeemer. 

The  house  of  Petrus  was  of  strong  and  well-joined 
stone,  and  the  palm-garden  adjoining  was  carefully 
tended.  Twenty  slaves,  many  camels,  and  even  two 
horses  belonged  to  him,  and  the  centurion  in  com- 
mand of  the  Imperial  garrison,  the  Gaul  Phoebicius, 
and  his  wife  Sirona,  lived  as  lodgers  under  his  roof ; 
not  quite  to  the  satisfaction  of  the  councillor,  for  the 
centurion  was  no  Christian,  but  a  worshipper  of  Mith- 
ras, in  whose  mysteries  the  wild  Gaul  had  risen  to 
the  grade  of  a  "  Lion,"  whence  his  people,  and  with 
them  the  Pharanites  in  general,  were  wont  to  speak 
of  him  as  "  the  Lion." 

His  predecessor  had  been  an  officer  of  much  lower 
rank  but  a  believing  Christian,  whom  Petrus  had 
himself  requested  to  live  in  his  house,  and  when, 
about  a  year  since,  the  Lion  Phoebicius  had  taken 
the  place  of  the  pious  Pankratius,  the  senator  could 
not  refuse  him  the  quarters,  which  had  become  a 
right. 

Hermas  went  shyly  and  timidly  towards  the  court 
of  Petrus'  house,  and  his  embarrassment  increased 
when  he  found  himself  in  the  hall  of  the  stately 
stone-house,  which  he  had  entered  without  let  or 
hindrance,  and  did  not  know  which  way  to  turn. 
There  was  no  one  there  to  direct  him,  and  he  dared 
not  go  up  the  stairs  which  led  to  the  upper  story, 
although  it  seemed  that  Petrus  must  be  there.  Yes, 
there  was  no  doubt,  for  he  heard  talking  overhead 
and  clearly  distinguished  the  Senator's  deep  voice. 


48  HOMO   SUM. 

Hermas  advanced,  and  set  his  foot  on  the  first  step 
of  the  stairs ;  but  he  had  scarcely  begun  to  go  up 
with  some  decision,  and  feeling  ashamed  of  his  bash- 
fulness,  when  he  heard  a  door  fly  open  just  above 
him,  and  from  it  there  poured  a  flood  of  fresh  laugh- 
ing children's  voices,  like  a  pent-up  stream  when  the 
miller  opens  the  sluice  gate. 

He  glanced  upwards  in  surprise,  but  there  was  no 
time  for  consideration,  for  the  shouting  troop  of  re- 
leased little  ones  had  already  reached  the  stairs.  In 
front  of  all  hastened  a  beautiful  young  woman  with 
golden  hair ;  she  was  laughing  gayly,  and  held  a 
gaudily-dressed  doll  high  above  her  head.  She  came 
backwards  towards  the  steps,  turning  her  fair  face 
beaming  with  fun  and  delight  towards  the  children, 
who,  full  of  their  eager  longing,  half  demanding, 
half  begging,  half  laughing,  half  crying,  shouted  in 
confusion,  "  Let  us  be,  Sirona."  "  Do  not  take  it 
away  again,  Sirona,"  "  Do  stay  here,  Sirona,"  again 
and  again,  "  Sirona — Sirona." 

A  lovely  six-year-old  maiden  stretched  up  as 
far  as  she  could  to  reach  the  round  white  arm  that 
held  the  plaything ;  with  her  left  hand,  which  was 
free,  she  gayly  pushed  away  three  smaller  children, 
who  tried  to  cling  to  her  knees  and  exclaimed,  still 
stepping  backwards,  "  No  no  ;  you  shall  not  have  it 
till  it  has  a  new  gown  ;  it  shall  be  as  long  and  as 
gay  as  the  Emperor's  robe.  Let  me  go,  Caecilia,  or 
you  will  fall  down  as  naughty  Nikon  did  the  other 
day." 

By  this  time  she  had  reached  the  steps;  she 


HOMO   SUM.  49 

turned  suddenly,  and  with  outstretched  arms  she 
stopped  the  way  of  the  narrow  stair  on  which  Her- 
mas  was  standing,  gazing  open-mouthed  at  the 
merry  scene  above  his  head.  Just  as  Sirona  was 
preparing  to  run  down,  she  perceived  him  and 
started ;  but  when  she  saw  that  the  anchorite  from 
pure  embarrassment  could  find  no  words  in  which 
to  answer  her  question  as  to  what  he  wanted,  she 
laughed  heartily  again  and  called  out, 

"  Come  up,  we  shall  not  hurt  you — shall  we,  chil- 
dren?" 

Meanwhile  Hernias  had  found  courage  enough  to 
give  utterance  to  his  wish  to  speak  with  the  Senator, 
and  the  young  woman,  who  looked  with  compla- 
cency on  his  strong  and  youthful  frame,  offered  to 
conduct  him  to  him. 

Petrus  had  been  talking  to  his  grown-up  elder 
sons ;  they  were  tall  men,  but  their  father  was  even 
taller  than  they,  and  of  unusual  breadth  of  shoulder. 

While  the  young  men  were  speaking,  he  stroked 
his  short  gray  beard  and  looked  down  at  the  ground 
in  sombre  gravity,  as  it  might  have  seemed  to  the 
careless  observer;  but  any  one  who  looked  closer 
might  quickly  perceive  that  not  seldom  a  pleased 
smile,  though  not  less  often  a  somewhat  bitter  one 
played  upon  the  lips  of  the  prudent  and  judicious 
man.  He  was  one  of  those  who  can  play  with  their 
children  like  a  young  mother,  take  the  sorrows  of 
another  as  much  to  heart  as  if  they  were  their  own, 
and  yet  who  look  so  gloomy,  and  allow  themselves 
to  make  such  sharp  speeches,  that  only  those  who 
4 


50  HOMO   SUM. 

are  on  terms  of  perfect  confidence  with  them,  cease 
to  misunderstand  them  and  fear  them.  There  was 
something  fretting  the  soul  of  this  man,  who  never- 
theless possessed  all  that  could  contribute  to  human 
happiness.  His  was  a  thankful  nature,  and  yet  he 
was  conscious  that  he  might  have  been  destined  to 
something  greater  than  fate  had  permitted  him 
to  achieve  or  to  be.  He  had  remained  a  stone-cutter, 
but  his  sons  had  both  completed  their  education  in 
good  schools  in  Alexandria.  The  elder,  Antonius, 
who  already  had  a  house  of  his  own  and  a  wife  and 
children,  was  an  architect  and  artist-mechanic  ;  the 
younger,  Polykarp,  was  a  gifted  young  sculptor. 
The  noble  church  of  the  oasis  city  had  been  built  un- 
der the  direction  of  the  elder ;  Polykarp,  who  had 
only  come  home  a  month  since,  was  preparing  to 
establish  and  carry  on  works  of  great  extent  in  his 
father's  quarries,  for  he  had  received  a  commission 
to  decorate  the  new  court  of  the  Sebasteion  or 
Caesareum,  as  it  was  called — a  grand  pile  in  Alexan- 
dria— with  twenty  granite  lions.  More  than  thirty 
artists  had  competed  with  him  for  this  work,  but 
the  prize  was  unanimously  adjudged  to  his  models 
by  qualified  judges.  The  architect  whose  function 
it  was  to  construct  the  colonnades  and  pavement  of 
the  court  was  his  friend,  and  had  agreed  to  procure 
the  blocks  of  granite,  the  flags  and  the  columns 
which  he  required  from  Petrus'  quarries,  and  not,  as 
had  formerly  been  the  custom,  from  those  of  Syene 
by  the  first  Cataract. 
Antonius  and  Polykarp  were  now  standing  with 


HOMO  SUM.  51 

their  father  before  a  large  table,  explaining  to  him 
a  plan  which  they  had  worked  out  together  and 
traced  on  the  thin  wax  surface  of  a  wooden  tablet. 
The  young  architect's  proposal  was  to  bridge  over  a 
deep  but  narrow  gorge,  which  the  beasts  of  burden 
were  obliged  to  avoid  by  making  a  wide  circuit,  and 
so  to  make  a  new  way  from  the  quarries  to  the  sea, 
which  should  be  shorter  by  a  third  than  the  old  one, 
The  cost  of  this  structure  would  soon  be  recouped 
by  the  saving  in  labor,  and  with  perfect  certainty, 
if  only  the  transport-ships  were  laden  at  Clysma 
with  a  profitable  return  freight  of  Alexandrian 
manufactures,  instead  of  returning  empty  as  they 
had  hitherto  done.  Petrus,  who  could  shine  as  a 
speaker  in  the  council-meetings,  in  private  life  spoke 
but  little.  At  each  of  his  son's  new  projects  he 
raised  his  eyes  to  the  speaker's  face,  a  sif  to  see 
whether  the  young  man  had  not  lost  his  wits,  while 
his  mouth,  only  half  hidden  by  his  gray  beard,  smiled 
approvingly. 

When  Antonius  began  to  unfold  his  plan  for  rem- 
edying the  inconvenience  of  the  ravine  that  im- 
peded the  way,  the  senator  muttered,  "Only  get 
feathers  to  grow  on  the  slaves,  and  turn  the  black 
ones  into  ravens  and  the  white  ones  into  gulls,  and 
then  they  might  fly  across.  What  do  not  people 
learn  in  the  metropolis ! " 

When  he  heard  the  word  "  bridge  "  he  stared  at  the 
young  artist.  "The  only  question,"  said  he,  "is 
whether  Heaven  will  lend  us  a  rainbow."  But  when 
Polykarp  proposed  to  get  some  cedar  trunks  from 


52  HOMO  SUM. 

Syria  through  his  friends  in  Alexandria,  and  when 
his  eldest  son  explained  his  drawings  of  the  arch  with 
which  he  promised  to  span  the  gorge  and  make  it 
strong  and  safe,  he  followed  their  words  with  atten- 
tion ;  at  the  same  time  he  knit  his  eyebrows  as 
gloomily  and  looked  as  stern  as  if  he  were  listening  to 
some  narrative  of  crime.  Still,  he  let  them  speak  on  to 
the  end,  and  though  at  first  he  only  muttered  that 
it  was  mere  "  fancy-work,"  or  "  Aye,  indeed,  if  I 
were  the  emperor ;  "  he  afterwards  asked  clear  and 
precise  questions,  to  which  he  received  positive  and 
well  considered  answers.  Antonius  proved  by  figures 
that  the  profit  on  the  delivery  of  material  for  the 
Caesareum  only  would  cover  more  than  three  quarters 
of  the  outlay.  Then  Polykarp  began  to  speak  and 
declare  that  the  granite  of  the  Holy  Mountain  was 
finer  in  color  and  in  larger  blocks  than  that  from 
Syene. 

"  "We  work  cheaper  here  than  at  the  Cataract,"  in- 
terrupted Antonius.  uAnd  the  transport  of  the 
blocks  will  not  come  too  dear  when  we  have  the  bridge 
and  command  the  road  to  the  sea,  and  avail  our- 
selves of  the  canal  of  Trajan,  which  joins  the  Nile  to 
the  Red  Sea,  and  which  in  a  few  months  will  again 
be  navigable." 

"  And  if  my  lions  are  a  success,"  added  Polykarp^ 
"  and  if  Zenodotus  is  satisfied  with  our  stoue  and  our 
work,  it  may  easily  happen  that  we  outstrip  Syene 
in  competition,  and  that'some  of  the  enormous  or- 
ders that  now  flow  from  Constantine's  new  residence 
to  the  quarries  at  Syene,  may  find  their  way  to  us." 


HOMO  SUM.  53 

"  Polykarp  is  not  over-sanguine,"  continued  An- 
tonius,  "  for  the  emperor  is  beautifying  and  adding 
to  Byzantium  with  eager  haste.  Whoever  erects  a 
new  house  has  a  yearly  allowance  of  corn,  and  in 
order  to  attract  folks  of  our  stamp — of  whom  he 
cannot  get  enough — he  promises  entire  exemption 
from  taxation  to  all  sculptors,  architects,  and  even 
to  skilled  laborers.  If  we  finish  the  blocks  and  pil- 
lars here  exactly  to  the  designs,  they  will  take  up  no 
superfluous  room  in  the  ships,  and  no  one  will  be 
able  to  deliver  them  so  cheaply  as  we." 

"  No,  nor  so  good,"  cried  Polykarp,  "  for  you 
yourself  are  an  artist,  father,  and  understand  stone- 
work as  well  as  any  man.  I  never  saw  a  finer  or 
more  equally  colored  granite  than  the  block  you 
picked  out  for  my  first  lion.  I  am  finishing  it  here 
on  the  spot,  and  I  fancy  it  will  make  a  show.  Cer- 
tainly it  will  be  difficult  to  take  a  foremost  place 
among  the  noble  works  of  the  most  splendid  period 
of  art,  which  already  fill  the  Caesareum,  but  I  will  do 
my  best." 

"  The  Lions  will  be  admirable,"  cried  Antonius  with 
a  glance  of  pride  at  his  brother.  "  Nothing  like 
them  has  been  done  by  any  one  these  ten  years,  and 
I  know  the  Alexandrians.  If  the  master's  work  is 
praised  that  is  made  out  of  granite  from  the  Holy 
Mountain,  all  the  world  will  have  granite  from  thence 
and  from  nowhere  else.  It  all  depends  on  whether 
the  transport  of  the  stone  to  the  sea  can  be  made 
less  difficult  and  costly." 

"  Let  us  try  it  then,"  said  Petrus,  who  during  his 


54  HOMO  SUM. 

sons'  talk  had  walked  up  and  down  before  them  in 
silence.  "  Let  us  try  the  building  of  the  bridge  in 
the  name  of  the  Lord.  "We  will  work  out  the  road 
if  the  municipality  will  declare  themselves  ready  to 
bear  half  the  cost;  not  otherwise,  and  I  tell  you 
frankly  you  have  both  grown  most  able  men." 

The  younger  son  grasped  his  father's  hand  and 
pressed  it  with  warm  affection  to  his  lips.  Petrus 
hastily  stroked  his  brown  locks,  then  he  offered  his 
strong  right  hand  to  his  eldest-born  and  said, 

"  We  must  increase  the  number  of  our  slaves.  Call 
your  mother,  Polykarp." 

The  youth  obeyed  with  cheerful  alacrity,  and  when 
Dame  Dorothea — who  was  sitting  at  the  loom  with 
her  daughter  Marthana  and  some  of  her  female 
slaves — saw  him  rush  into  the  women's  room  with 
a  glowing  face,  she  rose  with  youthful  briskness 
in  spite  of  her  stout  and  dignified  figure,  and  called 
out  to  her  son, 

"  He  has  approved  of  your  plans  ? " 

"  Bridge  and  all,  mother,  everything,"  cried  the 
young  man.  "  Finer  granite  for  my  lions,  than  my 
father  has  picked  out  for  me  is  nowhere  to  be  found, 
and  how  glad  I  am  for  Antonius !  only  we  must  have 
patience  about  the  roadway.  He  wants  to  speak  to 
you  at  once." 

Dorothea  signed  to  her  son  to  moderate  his  ecstasy, 
for  he  had  siezed  her  hand,  and  was  pulling  her  away 
with  him,  but  the  tears  that  stood  in  her  kind 
eyes  testified  how  deeply  she  sympathized  in  her 
favorite's  excitement. 


HOMO   SUM.  55 

"  Patience,  patience,  I  am  coming  directly,"  cried 
she,  drawing  away  her  hand  in  order  to  arrange  her 
dress  and  her  gray  hair,  which  was  abundant  and 
carefully  dressed  and  formed  a  meet  setting  for  her 
still  pleasing  and  unwrinkled  face. 

"  I  knew  it  would  be  so ;  when  you  have  a  rea- 
sonable thing  to  propose  to  your  father,  he  will  always 
listen  to  you  and  agree  with  you  without  my  inter- 
vention ;  women  should  not  mix  themselves  up  with 
men's  work.  Youth  draws  a  strong  bow  and  often 
shoots  beyond  the  mark.  It  would  be  a  pretty  thing 
if  out  of  foolish  affection  for  you  I  were  to  try  to 
play  the  Siren  that  should  ensnare  the  steersman 
of  the  house — your  father — with  flattering  words. 
You  laugh  at  the  gray-haired  Siren  ?  But  love  over- 
looks the  ravages  of  years  and  has  a  good  memory 
for  all  that  once  was  pleasing.  Besides,  men  have 
not  always  wax  in  their  ears  when  they  should  have. 
Come  now  to  your  father." 

Dorothea  went  out  past  Polykarp  and  her  daughter. 
The  former  held  his  sister  back  by  the  hand  and  asked, 

"  Was  not  Sirona  with  you  ? " 

The  sculptor  tried  to  appear  quite  indifferent,  but 
he  blushed  as  he  spoke ;  Marthana  observed  this  and 
replied  not  without  a  roguish  glance, 

"  She  did  show  us  her  pretty  face  ;  but  important 
business  called  her  away." 

"  Sirona  ? "  asked  Polykarp  incredulously. 

"  Certainly,  why  not !  "  answered  Marthana  laugh- 
ing. "  She  had  to  sew  a  new  gown  for  the  children's 
doll." 


56  HOMO   SUM. 

"  Why  do  you  mock  at  her  kindness  ?  "  said  Poly- 
karp  reproachfully. 

"  How  sensitive  you  are  !  "  said  Marthana  softly. 
"  Sirona  is  as  kind  and  sweet  as  an  angel ;  but  you 
had  better  look  at  her  rather  less,  for  she  is  not  one 
of  us,  and  repulsive  as  the  choleric  centurion  is  to 
me—" 

She  said  no  more,  for  Dame  Dorothea,  having 
reached  the  door  of  the  sitting-room,  looked  round 
for  her  children. 

Petrus  received  his  wife  with  no  less  gravity  than 
was  usual  with  him,  but  there  was  an  arch  sparkle 
in  his  half  closed  eyes  as  he  asked, 

"You  scarcely  know  what  is  going  on,  I  sup- 
pose ? " 

"  You  are  madmen,  who  would  fain  take  Heaven 
by  storm,"  she  answered  gayly. 

"  If  the  undertaking  fails,"  said  Petrus,  pointing 
to  his  sons,  "those  young  ones  will  feel  the  loss 
longer  than  we  shall." 

"  But  it  will  succeed,"  cried  Dorothea.  "  An  old 
commander  and  young  soldiers  can  win  any  battle." 
She  held  out  her  small  plump  hand  with  frank  brisk- 
ness to  her  husband,  he  clasped  it  cheerily  and  said, 

"I  think  I  can  carry  the  project  for  the  road 
through  the  Senate.  To  build  our  bridge  we  must 
also  procure  helping  hands,  and  for  that  we  need 
your  aid,  Dorothea.  Our  slaves  will  not  suffice." 

"  Wait,"  cried  the  lady  eagerly ;  she  went  to  the 
window  and  called,  "  Jethro,  Jethro !  " 

The  person  thus  addressed,  the  old  house-steward, 


HOMO  SUM.  ".  57 

appeared,  and  Dorothea  began  to  discuss  with  him 
as  to  which  of  the  inhabitants  of  the  oasis  might  be 
disposed  to  let  them  have  some  able-bodied  men,  and 
whether  it  might  not  be  possible  to  employ  one  or 
another  of  the  house-slaves  at  the  building. 

All  that  she  said  was  judicious  and  precise,  and 
showed  that  she  herself  superintended  her  household 
in  every  detail,  and  was  accustomed  to  command 
with  complete  freedom. 

"  That  tall  Anubis  then  is  really  indispensable  in 
the  stable  ? "  she  asked  in  conclusion.  The  steward, 
who  up  to  this  moment  had  spoken  shortly  and  in- 
telligently, hesitated  to  answer ;  at  the  same  time  he 
looked  up  at  Petrus,  who,  sunk  in  the  contemplation 
of  the  plan,  had  his  back  to  him ;  his  glance,  and  a 
deprecating  movement,  expressed  very  clearly  that 
he  had  something  to  tell,  but  feared  to  speak  in  the 
presence  of  his  master.  Dame  Dorothea  was  quick 
of  comprehension,  and  she  quite  understood  Jethro's 
meaning ;  it  was  for  that  very  reason  that  she  said 
with  more  of  surprise  than  displeasure, 

"  What  does  the  man  mean  with  his  winks  ?  "What 
I  may  hear,  Petrus  may  hear  too." 

The  senator  turned,  and  looked  at  the  steward 
from  head  to  foot  with  so  dark  a  glance,  that  he 
drew  back,  and  began  to  speak  quickly.  But  he  was 
interrupted  by  the  children's  clamors  on  the  stairs 
and  by  Sirona,  who  brought  Hermas  to  the  senator, 
and  said  laughing, 

"  I  found  this  great  fellow  on  the  stairs,  he  was 
seeking  you." 


58  HOMO   SUM. 

Petrus  looked  at  the  youth,  not  very  kindly,  and 
asked, 

"  "Who  are  you  ?  what  is  your  business  ? " 

Hernias  struggled  in  vain  for  speech ;  the  presence 
of  so  many  human  beings,  of  whom  three  were 
women,  filled  him  with  the  utmost  confusion.  His 
fingers  twisted  the  woolly  curls  on  his  sheep-skin, 
and  his  lips  moved  but  gave  no  sound :  at  last  he 
succeeded  in  stammering  out,  "  I  am  the  son  of  old 
Stephanus,  who  was  wounded  in  the  last  raid  of  the 
Saracens.  My  father  has  hardly  slept  these  five 
nights,  and  now  Paulus  has  sent  me  to  you — the 
pious  Paulus  of  Alexandria — but  you  know — and 
so  I—" 

"  I  see,  I  see,"  said  Petrus,  with  encouraging  kind- 
ness. "  You  want  some  medicine  for  the  old  man. 
See  Dorothea,  what  a  fine  young  fellow  he  is  grown, 
this  is  the  little  man  that  the  Antiochian  took  with 
him  up  the  mountain." 

Hernias  colored,  and  drew  himself  up ;  then  he 
observed  with  great  satisfaction  that  he  was  taller 
than  the  senator's  sons,  who  were  of  about  the  same 
age  as  he,  and  for  whom  he  had  a  stronger  feeling, 
allied  to  aversion  and  fear,  than  even  for  their  stern 
father.  Polykarp  measured  him  with  a  glance,  and 
said  aloud  to  Sirona,  with  whom  he  had  exchanged 
a  greeting,  and  off  whom  he  had  never  once  taken 
his  eyes  since  she  had  come  in. 

"  If  we  could  get  twenty  slaves  with  such  shoul- 
ders as  those,  we  should  get  on  well.  There  is  work 
to  be  done  here,  you  big  fellow — " 


HOMO   SUM.  59 

"  My  name  is  not '  fellow,'  but  Hermas,"  said  the 
anchorite,  and  the  veins  of  his  forehead  began  to 
swell. 

Polykarp  felt  that  his  father's  visitor  was  some- 
thing more  than  his  poor  clothing  would  seem  to 
indicate,  and  that  he  had  hurt  his  feelings.  He  had 
certainly  seen  some  old  anchorites,  who  led  a  con- 
templative and  penitential  life  up  on  the  sacred 
mountain,  but  it  had  never  occurred  to  him  that  a 
strong  youth  could  belong  to  the  brotherhood  of 
hermits.  So  he  said  to  him  kindly. 

"Hermas — is  that  your  name?  We  all  use  our 
hands  here,  and  labor  is  no  disgrace ;  what  is  your 
handicraft  ? " 

This  question  roused  the  young  anchorite  to  the 
highest  excitement,  and  Dame  Dorothea,  who  per- 
ceived what  was  passing  in  his  mind,  said  with  quick 
decision. 

"  He  nurses  his  sick  father.  That  is  what  you  do, 
my  son,  is  it  not  ?  Petrus  will  not  refuse  you  his 
help." 

"  Certainly  not,"  the  senator  added,  "  I  will  ac- 
company you  by-and-bye  to  see  him.  You  must 
know,  my  children,  that  this  youth's  father  was  a 
great  lord,  who  gave  up  rich  possessions  in  order 
to  forget  the  world,  where  he  had  gone  through 
bitter  experiences,  and  to  serve  God  in  his  own  way, 
which  we  ought  to  respect,  though  it  is  not  our  own. 
Sit  down  there,  my  son.  First  we  must  finish 
some  important  business,  and  then  I  will  go  with 
you." 


6o  HOMO   SUM. 

"  We  live  high  up  on  the  mountain,"  stammered 
Hennas. 

"  Then  the  air  will  be  all  the  purer,"  replied  the 
Senator.  "  But  stay — perhaps  the  old  man  is  alone 
— no  ?  The  good  Paulus,  you  say,  is  with  him  ? 
Then  he  is  in  good  hands,  and  you  may  wait." 

For  a  moment  Petrus  stood  considering,  then  he 
beckoned  to  his  sons,  and  said,  "  Antonius,  go  at 
once  and  see  about  some  slaves — you,  Polykarp, 
find  some  strong  beasts  of  burden.  You  are  gen- 
erally rather  easy  with  your  money,  and  in  this  case 
it  is  worth  while  to  buy  the  dearest.  The  sooner 
you  return  well  supplied  the  better.  Action  must 
not  halt  behind  decision,  but  follow  it  quickly  and 
sharply,  as  the  sound  follows  the  blow.  You, 
Marthana,  mix  some  of  the  brown  fever-potion  and 
prepare  some  bandages ;  you  have  the  key." 

"  I  will  help  her,"  cried  Sirona,  who  was  glad  to 
prove  herself  useful,  and  who  was  sincerely  sorrv 
for  the  sick  old  hermit ;  besides,  Hermas  seemed  to 
her  like  a  discovery  of  her  own,  for  whom  she  in- 
voluntarily felt  more  consideration  since  she  had 
learned  that  he  was  the  son  of  a  mail  of  rank. 

While  the  young  women  were  busy  at  the  medi- 
cine-cupboard, Antonius  and  Polykarp  left  the  room. 

The  latter  had  already  crossed  the  threshold,  when 
he  turned  once  more,  and  cast  a  long  look  at  Sirona. 
Then,  with  a  hasty  movement,  he  went  on,  closed 
the  door,  and  with  a  heavy  sigh  descended  the 
stairs.  As  soon  as  his  sons  were  gone,  Petrus  turned 
to  the  steward  again. 


HOMO   SUM.  6l 

"  What  is  wrong  with  the  slave  Anubis  ? "  he 
asked. 

"  He  is — wounded,  hurt,"  answered  Jethro,  "  and 
for  the  next  few  days  will  be  useless.  The  goat- 
girl  Miriam — the  wild  cat — cut  his  forehead  with 
her  reaping-hook." 

"  Why  did  not  I  hear  of  this  sooner  ? "  cried 
Dorothea  reprovingly.  "What  have  you  done  to 
the  girl?" 

"  We  have  shut  her  up  in  the  hay  loft,"  answered 
Jethro,  "  and  there  she  is  raging  and  storming." 
The  mistress  shook  her  head  disapprovingly.  "  The 
girl  will  not  be  improved  by  that  treatment,"  she 
said.  "  Go  and  bring  her  to  me." 

As  soon  as  the  intendant  had  left  the  room,  she 
exclaimed,  turning  to  her  husband,  "  One  may  well 
be  perplexed  about  these  poor  creatures,  when  one 
sees  how  they  behave  to  each  other.  I  have  seen 
it  a  thousand  times !  No  judgment  is  so  hard  as 
that  dealt  by  a  slave  to  slaves !  " 

Jethro  and  a  woman  now  led  Miriam  into  the 
room.  The  girl's  hands  were  bound  with  thick 
cords,  and  dry  grass  clung  to  her  dress  and  rough 
black  hair.  A  dark  fire  glowed  in  her  eyes,  and  the 
muscles  of  her  face  moved  incessantly,  as  if  she  had 
St.  Yitus'  dance.  When  Dorothea  looked  at  her 
she  drew  herself  up  defiantly,  and  looked  round  the 
room,  as  if  to  estimate  the  strength  of  her  enemies. 

She  then  perceived  Hennas ;  the  blood  left  her 
lips,  with  a  violent  eifort  she  tore  her  slender  hands 
out  of  the  loops  that  confined  them,  covering  her 


62  HOMO   SUM. 

face  with  them,  and  fled  to  the  door.  But  Jethro 
put  himself  in  her  way,  and  seized  her  shoulder 
with  a  strong  grasp.  Miriam  shrieked  aloud,  and 
the  senator's  daughter,  who  had  set  down  the  medi- 
cines she  had  had  in  her  hand,  and  had  watched  the 
girl's  movements  with  much  sympathy,  hastened  to- 
wards her.  She  pushed  away  the  old  man's  hand, 
and  said,  "  Do  not  be  frightened,  Miriam.  What- 
ever you  may  have  done,  my  father  can  forgive 
you." 

Her  voice  had  a  tone  of  sisterly  affection,  and 
the  shepherdess  followed  Marthana  unresistingly  to 
the  table,  on  which  the  plans  for  the  bridge  were 
lying,  and  stood  there  by  her  side. 

For  a  minute  all  were  silent ;  at  last  Dame  Dor- 
othea went  up  to  Miriam,  and  asked,  "  What  did 
they  do  to  you,  my  poor  child,  that  you  could  so 
forget  yourself  ? " 

Miriam  could  not  understand  what  was  happen- 
ing to  her;  she  had  been  prepared  for  scoldings 
and  blows,  nay  for  bonds  and  imprisonment,  and 
now  these  gentle  words  and  kind  looks  !  Her  de- 
fiant spirit  was  quelled,  her  eyes  met  the  friendly 
eyes  of  her  mistress,  and  she  said  in  a  low  voice, 

"  He  had  followed  me  for  such  a  long  time,  and 
wanted  to  ask  you  for  me  as  his  wife  ;  but  I  cannot 
bear  him — I  hate  him  as  I  do  all  your  slaves."  At 
these  words  her  eyes  sparkled  wildly  again,  and  with 
her  old  fire  she  went  on,  "  I  wish  I  had  only  hit  him 
with  a  stick  instead  of  a  sickle ;  but  I  took  what 
first  came  to  hand  to  defend  myself.  When  a  man 


HOMO  SUM.  63 

touches  me — I  cannot  bear  it,  it  is  horrible,  dread- 
ful !  Yesterday  I  came  home  later  then  usual  with 
the  beasts,  and  by  the  time  I  had  milked  the  goats, 
and  was  going  to  bed,  every  one  in  the  house  was 
asleep.  Then  Anubis  met  me,  and  began  chattering 
about  love ;  I  repelled  him,  but  he  seized  me,  and 
held  me  with  his  hand  here  on  my  head  and  wanted 
to  kiss  me ;  then  my  blood  rose,  I  caught  hold  of 
my  reaping  hook,  that  hung  by  my  side,  and  it  was 
not  till  I  saw  him  roaring  on  the  ground,  that  I  saw  I 
had  done  wrong.  How  it  happened  I  really  cannot 
tell — something  seemed  to  rise  up  in  me — something 
— I  don't  know  what  to  call  it.  It  drives  me  on  as 
the  wind  drives  the  leaves  that  lie  on  the  road,  and 
I  cannot  help  it.  The  best  thing  you  can  do  is  to 
let  me  die,  for  then  you  would  be  safe  once  for  all 
from  my  wickedness,  and  all  would  be  over  and 
done  with." 

"  How  can  you  speak  so  ?  "  interrupted  Mar- 
thana.  "  You  are  wild  and  ungovernable,  but  not 
wicked." 

"  Only  ask  him ! "  cried  the  girl,  pointing  with 
flashing  eyes  to  Hermas,  who,  on  his  part,  looked 
down  at  the  floor  in  confusion.  The  senator  ex- 
changed a  hasty  glance  with  his  wife ;  they  were  ac- 
customed to  understand  each  other  without  speech, 
and  Dorothea  said, 

"  He  who  feels  that  he  is  not  what  he  ought  to 
be,  is  already  on  the  high-road  to  amendment.  We 
let  you  keep  the  goats  because  you  were  always  run- 
ning after  the  flocks,  and  never  can  rest  in  the  house. 


64  HOMO   SUM. 

You  are  up  oiTthe  mountain  before  morning-prayer, 
and  never  come  home  till  after  supper  is  over,  and 
no  one  takes  any  thought  for  the  better  part  of  you. 
Half  of  your  guilt  recoils  upon  us,  and  we  have  no 
right  to  punish  you.  You  need  not  be  so  aston- 
ished; every  one  sometimes  does  wrong.  Petrus 
and  I  are  human  beings  like  you,  neither  more  nor 
less ;  but  we  are  Christians,  and  it  is  our  duty  to 
look  after  the  souls  which  God  has  intrusted  to  our 
care,  be  they  our  children  or  our  slaves.  You  must 
go  no  more  up  the  mountain,  but  shall  stay  with  us 
in  the  house.  I  shall  willingly  forgive  your  hasty 
deed  if  Petrus  does  not  think  it  necessary  to  punish 
you." 

The  senator  gravely  shook  his  head  in  sign  of 
agreement,  and  Dorothea  turned  to  inquire  of  Je- 
thro, 

"  Is  Anubis  badly  wounded  and  does  he  need  any 
care?" 

"  He  is  lying  in  a  fever  and  wanders  in  his  talk," 
was  the  answer.  "  Old  Praxinoa  is  cooling  his 
wound  with  water." 

"Then  Miriam  can  take  her  place  and  try  to 
remedy  the  mischief  which  she  was  the  cause  of," 
said  Dorothea.  Half  of  your  guilt  will  be  atoned 
for,  girl,  if  Anubis  recovers  under  your  care.  I  will 
come  presently  with  Marthana,  and  show  you  how 
to  make  a  bandage."  The  shepherdess  cast  down 
her  eyes,  and  passively  allowed  herself  to  be  con- 
ducted to  the  wounded  man. 

Meanwhile  Marthana  had  prepared  the  brown 


HOMO   SUM.  65 

mixture.  Petrus  had  his  staff  and  felt-hat  brought 
to  him,  gave  Hennas  the  medicine  and  desired  him 
to  follow  him. 

Sirona  looked  after  the  couple  as  they  went. 
"  What  a  pity  for  such  a  fine  lad  !  "  she  exclaimed. 
"  A  purple  coat  would  suit  him  better  than  that 
wretched  sheep-skin." 

The  mistress  shrugged  her  shoulders,  and  signing 
to  her  daughter  said, 

"  Come  to  work,  Marthana,  the  sun  is  already 
high.  How  the  days  fly  !  the  older  one  grows  the 
quicker  the  hours  hurry  away." 

"  I  must  be  very  young  then,"  said  the  centurion's 
wife  "  for  in  this  wilderness  time  seems  to  me  to 
creep  along  frightfully  slow.  One  day  is  the  same 
as  another,  and  I  often  feel  as  if  life  were  standing 
perfectly  still,  and  my  heart-pulses  with  it.  What 
should  I  be  without  your  house  and  the  children ! — 
always  the  same  mountain,  the  same  palm-trees, 
the  same  faces ! — 

"  But  the  mountain  is  glorious,  the  trees  are  beau- 
tiful ! "  answered  Dorothea.  "  And  if  we  love  the 
people  with  whom  we  are  in  daily  intercourse,  even 
here  we  may  be  contented  and  happy.  At  least  we 
ourselves  are,  so  far  as  the  difficulties  of  life  allow. 
I  have  often  told  you,  what  you  want  is  work." 

"  Work  !  but  for  whom  ? "  asked  Sirona.  "  If 
indeed  I  had  children  like  you !  Even  in  Rome  I 
was  not  happy,  far  from  it ;  and  yet  there  was 
plenty  to  do  and  to  think  about.  Here  a  proces- 
sion, there  a  theatre ;  but  here  !  And  for  whom 
5 


66  HOMO   SUM. 

should  I  dress  even  ?  My  jewels  grow  dull  in  my 
chest,  and  the  moths  eat  my  best  clothes.  I  am 
making  doll's  clothes  now  of  my  colored  cloak  for 
your  little  ones.  If  some  demon  were  to  transform 
me  into  a  hedgehog  or  a  gray  owl,  it  would  be  all 
the  same  to  me." 

"  Do  not  be  so  sinful,"  said  Dorothea  gravely,  but 
looking  with  kindly  admiration  at  the  golden  hair 
and  lovely  sweet  face  of  the  young  woman.  "  It 
ought  to  be  a  pleasure  to  you  to  dress  yourself  for 
your  husband." 

"  For  him  ?  "  said  Sirona.  "  He  never  looks  at 
me,  or  if  he  does  it  is  only  to  abuse  me.  The  only 
wonder  to  me  is  that  I  can  still  be  merry  at  all ;  nor 
am  I,  except  in  your  house,  and  not  there  even  but 
when  I  forget  him  altogether." 

"  I  will  not  hear  such  things  said — not  another 
word,"  interrupted  Dorothea  severely.  "  Take  the 
linen  and  cooling  lotion,  Marthana,  we  will  go  and 
bind  up  Anubis'  wound." 


HOMO   SUM.  67 


CHAPTEK  IY. 

PETRUS  went  up  the  mountain-side  with  Hernias. 
The  old  man  followed  the  youth,  who  showed  him 
the  way,  and  as  he  raised  his  eyes  from  time  to 
time,  he  glanced  with  admiration  at  his  guide's 
broad  shoulders  and  elastic  limbs.  The  road  grew 
broader  when  it  reached  a  little  mountain  plateau, 
and  from  thence  the  two  men  walked  on  side  by 
side,  but  for  some  time  without  speaking  till  the 
Senator  asked,  "How  long  now  has  your  father 
lived  up  on  the  mountain  ? " 

"Many  years,"  answered  Hernias.  "But  I  do 
not  know  how  many — and  it  is  all  one.  No  one 
inquires  about  time  up  here  among  us." 

The  Senator  stood  still  a  moment  and  measured 
his  companion  with  a  glance. 

"  You  have  been  with  your  father  ever  since  he 
came  ? "  he  asked. 

"  He  never  lets  me  out  of  his  sight,"  replied  Her- 
mas.  "  I  have  been  only  twice  into  the  oasis,  even 
to  go  to  the  church." 

"  Then  you  have  been  to  no  school  ? " 

"  To  what  school  should  I  go !  My  father 
has  taught  me  to  read  the  Gospels  and  I  could 


68  HOMO   SUM. 

" 

write,  but  I  have  nearly  forgotten  how.  Of  what 
use  would  it  be  to  me?  We  live  like  praying 
beasts." 

Deep  bitterness  sounded  in  the  last  words,  and 
Petrus  could  see  into  the  troubled  spirit  of  his  com- 
panion, overflowing  as  it  was  with  weary  disgust, 
and  he  perceived  how  the  active  powers  of  youth  re- 
volted in  aversion  againt  the  slothful  waste  of  life, 
to  which  he  was  condemned.  He  was  grieved  for 
the  boy,  and  he  was  not  one  of  those  who  pass 
by  those  in  peril  without  helping  them.  Then  he 
thought  of  his  own  sons,  who  had  grown  up  in 
the  exercise  and  fulfilment  of  serious  duties,  and  he 
owned  to  himself  that  the  fine  young  fellow  by  his  side 
was  in  no  way  their  inferior,  and  needed  nothing 
but  to  be  guided  aright.  He  thoughtfully  looked 
first  at  the  youth  and  then  on  the  ground,  and  mut- 
tered unintelligible  words  into  his  gray  beard  as  they 
walked  on.  Suddenly  he  drew  himself  up  and  nod- 
ded decisively ;  he  would  make  an  attempt  to  save 
Hermas,  and  faithful  to  his  own  nature,  action  trod 
on  the  heels  of  resolve.  Where  the  little  level  end- 
ed the  road  divided,  one  path  continued  to  lead  up- 
wards, the  other  deviated  to  the  valley  and  ended  at 
the  quarries.  Petrus  was  for  taking  the  latter,  but 
Hermas  cried  out,  "  That  is  not  the  way  to  our  cave ; 
you  must  follow  me." 

"  Follow  thou  me ! "  replied  the  Senator,  and  the 
words  were  spoken  with  a  tone  and  expression,  that 
left  no  doubt  in  the  youth's  mind  as  to  their  double 
meaning.  "  The  day  is  yet  before  us,  and  we  will 


HOMO   SUM.  69 

see  what  my  laborers  are  doing.  Do  you  know  the 
spot  where  they  quarry  the  stone  ? " 

"  How  should  I  not  know  it  ? "  said  Hennas,  pass- 
ing the  Senator  to  lead  the  way.  "  I  know  every 
path  from  our  mountain  to  the  oasis,  and  to  the  sea. 
A  panther  had  its  lair  in  the  ravine  behind  your 
quarries." 

"  So  we  have  learnt,"  said  Petrus.  "  The  thiev- 
ish beasts  have  slaughtered  two  young  camels,  and 
the  people  can  neither  catch  them  in  their  toils  nor 
run  them  down  with  dogs." 

"  They  will  leave  you  in  peace  now,"  said  the  boy 
laughing.  "  I  brought  down  the  male  from  the  rock 
up  there  with  an  arrow,  and  I  found  the  mother  in 
a  hollow  with  her  young  ones.  I  had  a  harder  job 
with  her  ;  my  knife  is  so  bad,  and  the  copper  blade 
bent  with  the  blow ;  I  had  to  strangle  the  gaudy 
devil  with  my  hands,  and  she  tore  my  shoulder  and 
bit  my  arm.  Look !  there  are  the  scars.  But  thank 
God,  my  wounds  heal  quicker  than  my  father's. 
Paulus  says,  I  am  like  an  earth-worm  ;  when  it  is  cut 
in  two  the  two  halves  say  good-by  to  each  other,  and 
crawl  off  sound  and  gay,  one,  one  way,  and  the  other 
another  way.  The  young  panthers  were  so  funny 
and  helpless,  I  would  not  kill  them,  but  I  did  them 
up  in  my  sheepskin  and  brought  them  to  my  father. 
He  laughed  at  the  little  beggars,  and  then  a  Naba- 
taean  took  them  to  be  sold  at  Clysma  to  a  merchant 
from  Rome,  There  and  at  Byzantium,  there  is  a 
demand  for  all  kinds  of  living  beasts  of  prey.  I  got 
some  money  for  the  skins  of  the  old  ones,  and  kept 


70  HOMO   SUM. 

it  to  pay  for  my  journey,  when  I  went  with  the 
others  to  Alexandria  to  ask  the  blessing  of  the  new 
Patriarch." 

"  You  went  to  the  metropolis  ? "  asked  Petrus. 
"  You  saw  the  great  structures,  that  secure  the  coast 
from  the  inroads  of  the  sea,  the  tall  Pharos  with 
the  far-shining  fire,  the  strong  bridges,  the  churches, 
the  palaces  and  temples  with  their  obelisks,  pillars, 
and  beautiful  paved  courts  ?  Did  it  never  enter  your 
mind  to  think,  that  it  would  be  a  proud  thing  to 
construct  such  buildings  ?  " 

Hernias  shook  his  head.  "  Certainly  I  would 
rather  live  in  an  airy  house  with  colonnades  than  in 
our  dingy  cavern,  but  building  would  never  be  in  my 
way.  What  a  long  time  it  takes  to  put  one  stone  on 
another !  I  am  not  patient,  and  when  I  leave  my 
father  I  will  do  something  that  shall  win  me  fame. 
But  there  are  the  quarries —  Petrus  did  not  let 
his  companion  finish  his  sentence,  but  interrupted 
him  with  all  the  warmth  of  youth,  exclaiming  : 

"  And  do  you  mean  to  say  that  fame  cannot  be 
won  by  the  arts  of  building?  Look  there  at  the 
blocks  and  flags,  here  at  the  pillars  of  hard  stone. 
These  are  all  to  be  sent  to  Aila,  and  there  my 
son  Antonius,  the  elder  of  the  two  that  you  saw  just 
now,  is  going  to  build  a  House  of  God,  with  strong 
walls  and  pillars,  much  larger  and  handsomer  than 
our  church  in  the  oasis,  and  that  is  his  work  too.  He 
is  not  much  older  than  you  are,  and  already  he  is 
famous  among  the  people  far  and  wide.  Out  of  those 
red  blocks  down  there  my  younger  son  Polykarp 


HOMO  SUM.  71 

will  hew  noble  lions,  which  are  destined  to  decorate 
the  finest  building  in  the  capital  itself.  When  you  and 
I,  and  all  that  are  now  living,  shall  have  been  long 
since  forgotten,  still  it  will  be  said  these  are  the  work 
of  the  Master  Polykarp,  the  son  of  Petrus,  the  Phar- 
anite.  "What  he  can  do  is  certainly  a  thing  peculiar 
to  himself,  no  one  who  is  not  one  of  the  chosen  and 
gifted  ones  can  say,  '  I  will  learn  to  do  that.'  But 
you  have  a  sound  understanding,  strong  hands  and 
open  eyes,  and  who  can  tell  what  else  there  is  hidden 
in  you.  If  you  could  begin  to  learn  soon,  it  would  not 
yet  be  too  late  to  make  a  worthy  master  of  you,  but 
of  course  he  who  would  rise  so  high  must  not  be 
afraid  of  work.  Is  your  mind  set  upon  fame  ?  That 
is  quite  right,  and  I  am  very  glad  of  it ;  but  you 
must  know  that  he  who  would  gather  that  rare  fruit 
must  water  it,  as  a  noble  heathen  once  said,  with  the 
sweat  of  his  brow.  Without  trouble  and  labor  and 
struggles  there  can  be  no  victory,  and  men  rarely 
earn  fame  without  fighting  for  victory." 

The  old  man's  vehemence  was  contagious;  the 
lad's  spirit  was  roused,  and  he  exclaimed  warmly, 

"  What  do  you  say  ?  that  I  am  afraid  of  struggles 
and  trouble  ?  I  am  ready  to  stake  everything,  even 
my  life,  only  to  win  fame.  But  to  measure  stone,  to 
batter  defenceless  blocks  with  a  mallet  and  chisel, 
or  to  join  the  squares  with  accurate  pains — that  does 
not  tempt  me.  I  should  like  •  to  win  the  wreath  in 
the  Pala9stra  by  flinging  the  strongest  to  the  ground, 
or  surpass  all  others  as  a  warrior  in  battle  ;  my 
father  was  a  soldier  too,  and  he  may  talk  as  much 


?2  HOMO  SUM. 

as  he  will  of  '  peace,'  and  nothing  but '  peace, '  all 
the  same  in  his  dreams  he  speaks  of  bloody  strife 
and  burning  wounds.  If  you  only  cure  him  I  will 
stay  no  longer  on  this  lonely  mountain,  even  if  I 
must  steal  away  in  secret.  For  what  did  God  give 
me  these  arms,  if  not  to  use  them?  " 

Petrus  made  no  answer  to  these  words,  which 
came  in  a  stormy  flood  from  Hernias'  lips,  but  he 
stroked  his  gray  beard,  and  thought  to  himself, 
"  The  young  of  the  eagle  does  not  catch  flies.  I 
shall  never  win  over  this  soldier's  son  to  our  peace- 
ful handicraft,  but  he  shall  not  remain  on  the 
mountain  among  these  queer  sluggards,  for  there 
he  is  being  ruined,  and  yet  he  is  not  of  a  common 
sort.  " 

When  he  had  given  a  few  orders  to  the  overseer 
of  his  workmen,  he  followed  the  young  man  to  see 
his  suffering  father. 

It  was  now  some  hours  since  Hermas  and  Paulus 
had  left  the  wounded  anchorite,  and  he  still  lay  alone 
in  his  cave.  The  sun,  as  it  rose  higher  and  higher, 
blazed  down  upon  the  rocks,  which  began  to  radiate 
their  heat,  and  the  hermit's  dwelling  was  suffocat- 
ingly hot.  The  pain  of  the  poor  man's  wound  in- 
creased, his  fever  was  greater,  and  he  was  very 
thirsty.  There  stood  the  jug,  which  Paulus  had 
given  him,  but  it  was  long  since  empty,  and  neither 
Paulus  nor  Hermas  had  come  back.  He  listened 
anxiously  to  the  sounds  in  the  distance,  and  fancied 
at  first  that  he  heard  the  Alexandrian's  footstep, 


HOMO  SUM.  73 

and  then  that  he  heard  loud  words  and  suppressed 
groans  coming  from  his  cave.  Stephanus  tried  to 
call  out,  but  he  himself  could  hardly  hear  the  feeble 
sound,  which,  with  his  wounded  breast  and  parched 
mouth,  he  succeeded  in  uttering.  Then  he  fain 
would  have  prayed,  but  fearful  mental  anguish  dis- 
turbed his  devotion.  All  the  horrors  of  desertion 
came  upon  him,  and  he  who  had  lived  a  life  over- 
flowing with  action  and  enjoyment,  with  disenchant- 
ment and  satiety,  who  now  in  solitude  carried  on  an 
incessant  spiritual  struggle  for  the  highest  goal — 
this  man  felt  himself  as  disconsolate  and  lonely  as  a 
bewildered  child  that  has  lost  its  mother. 

He  lay  on  his  bed  of  pain  softly  crying,  and  when 
he  observed  by  the  shadow  of  the  rock  that  the  sun 
had  passed  its  noonday  height,  indignation  and 
bitter  feeling  were  added  to  pain,  thirst,  and  weari- 
ness. He  doubled  his  fists  and  muttered  words 
which  sounded  like  soldier's  oaths,  and  with  them 
the  name  now  of  Paulus,  now  of  his  son.  At  last 
anguish  gained  the  upper  hand  of  his  anger,  and  it 
seemed  to  him,  as  though  he  were  living  over  again 
the  most  miserable  hour  of  his  life,  an  hour  now 
long  since  past  and  gone. 

He  thought  he  was  returning  from  a  noisy  ban- 
quet in  the  palace  of  the  Ca3sars.  His  slaves  had 
taken  the  garlands  of  roses  and  poplar  leaves  from 
his  brow  and  breast,  and  robed  him  in  his  night- 
dress ;  now,  with  a  silver  lamp  in  his  hand,  he  was 
approaching  his  bedroom,  and  he  smiled,  for  his 
young  wife  was  awaiting  him,  the  mother  of  his 


74  HOMO  SUM. 

Hernias.  She  was  fair  and  he  loved  her  well,  and 
he  had  brought  home  witty  sayings  to  repeat  to  her 
from  the  table  of  the  Emperor.  He,  if  any  one, 
had  a  right  to  smile.  Now  he  was  in  the  ante-room, 
in  which  two  slave-women  were  accustomed  to  keep 
watch ;  he  found  only  one,  and  she  was  sleeping 
and  breathing  deeply ;  he  still  smiled  as  he  threw 
the  light  upon  her  face — how  stupid  she  looked  with 
her  mouth  open!  An  alabaster  lamp  shed  a  dim 
light  in  the  bedroom,  softly  and  still  smiling  he 
went  up  to  Glycera's  ivory  couch,  and  held  up  his 
lamp,  and  stared  at  the  empty  and  undisturbed  bed 
— and  the  smile  faded  from  his  lips.  The  smile  of 
that  evening  came  back  to  him  no  more  through  all 
the  long  years,  for  Glycera  had  betrayed  him,  and 
left  him — him  and  her  child.  All  this  had  hap- 
pened twenty  years  since,  and  to-day  all  that  he  had 
then  felt  had  returned  to  him,  and  he  saw  his  wife's 
empty  couch  with  his  "  mind's  eye,"  as  plainly  as  he 
had  then  seen  it,  and  he  felt  as  lonely  and  as  miser- 
able as  in  that  night.  But  now  a  shadow  appeared 
before  the  opening  of  the  cave,  and  he  breathed  a 
deep  sigh  as  he  felt  himself  released  from  the  hid- 
eous vision,  for  he  had  recognized  Paulus,  who  came 
up  and  knelt  down  beside  him. 

"  Water,  water ! "  Stephanus  implored  in  a  low 
voice,  and  Paulus,  who  was  cut  to  the  heart  by  the 
moaning  of  the  old  man,  which  he  had  not  heard 
till  he  entered  the  cave,  seized  the  pitcher.  He 
looked  into  it,  and,  finding  it  quite  dry,  he  rushed 
down  to  the  spring  as  if  he  were  running  for  a  wager, 


HOMO  SUM.  75 

filled  it  to  the  brim  and  brought  it  to  the  lips  of  the 
sick  man,  who  gulped  the  grateful  drink  down  with 
deep  draughts,  and  at  last  exclaimed  with  a  sigh  of 
relief,  "  That  is  better ;  why  were  you  so  long- 
away  ?  I  was  so  thirsty  ! "  Paulus  who  had  fallen 
again  on  his  knees  by  the  old  man,  pressed  his  brow 
against  the  couch,  and  made  no  reply.  Stephanus 
gazed  in  astonishment  at  his  companion,  but  per- 
ceiving that  he  was  weeping  passionately  he  asked 
no  farther  questions.  Perfect  stillness  reigned  in 
the  cave  for  about  an  hour ;  at  last  Paulus  raised 
his  face,  and  said,  "  Forgive  me,  Stephanus.  I  for- 
got your  necessity  in  prayer  and  scourging,  in  order 
to  recover  the  peace  of  mind  I  had  trifled  away — no 
heathen  would  have  done  such  a  thing  ! "  The  sick 
man  stroked  his  friend's  arm  affectionately;  but 
Paulus  murmured, "  Egoism,  miserable  egoism  guides 
and  governs  us.  Which  of  us  ever  thinks  of  the 
needs  of  others  ?  And  we — we  who  profess  to  walk 
in  the  way  of  the  Lamb  !  " 

He  sighed  deeply,  and  leaned  his  head  on  the 
sick  man's  breast,  who  lovingly  stroked  his  rough 
hair,  and  it  was  thus  that  the  Senator  found  him, 
when  he  entered  the  cave  with  Hermas. 

The  idle  way  of  life  of  the  anchorites  was  wholly 
repulsive  to  his  views  of  the  life-task  for  men  and 
for  Christians,  but  he  succored  those  whom  he 
could,  and  made  no  inquiries  about  the  condition  of 
the  sufferer.  The  pathetic  union  in  which  he  found 
the  two  men  touched  his  heart,  and,  turning  to 
Paulus,  he  said  kindly, 


76  HOMO  SUM. 

"  I  can  leave  you  in  perfect  comfort,  for  you  seem 
to  me  to  have  a  faithful  nurse." 

The  Alexandrian  reddened;  he  shook  his  head, 
and  replied, 

"  I  ?  I  thought  of  no  one  but  myself,  and  left  him 
to  suffer  and  thirst  in  neglect,  but  now  I  will  not  quit 
him — no,  indeed,  I  will  not,  and  by  God's  help  and 
yours,  he  shall  recover." 

Petrus  gave  him  a  friendly  nod,  for  he  did  not  be- 
lieve in  the  anchorite's  self -accusation,  though  he 
did  in  his  good- will ;  and  before  he  left  the  cave,  he 
desired  Hermas  to  come  to  him  early  on  the  follow- 
ing day  to  give  him  news  of  his  father's  state.  He 
wished  not  only  to  cure  Stephanus,  but  to  continue 
his  relations  with  the  youth,  who  had  excited  his 
interest  in  the  highest  degree,  and  he  had  resolved 
to  help  him  to  escape  from  the  inactive  life  which 
was  weighing  upon  him. 

Paulus  declined  to  share  the  simple  supper  that 
the  father  and  son  were  eating,  but  expressed  his 
intention  of  remaining  with  the  sick  man.  He  de- 
sired Hermas  to  pass  the  night  in  his  dwelling,  as 
the  scanty  limits  of  the  cave  left  but  narrow  room 
for  the  lad. 

A  new  life  had  this  day  dawned  upon  the  young 
man  ;  all  the  grievances  and  desires  which  had  filled 
his  soul  ever  since  his  journey  to  Alexandria,  crowd- 
ing together  in  dull  confusion,  had  taken  form  and 
color,  and  he  knew  now  that  he  could  not  remain  an 
anchorite,  but  must  try  his  over-abundant  strength 
in  real  life. 


HOMO   SUM.  77 

"  My  father,"  thought  he,  "  was  a  warrior,  and 
lived  in  a  palace,  before  he  retired  into  our  dingy 
cave ;  Paulus  was  Menander,  and  to  this  day  has 
not  forgotten  how  to  throw  the  discus ;  I  am  young, 
strong,  and  free-born  as  they  were,  and  Petrus  says, 
I  might  have  been  a  fine  man.  I  will  not  hew  and 
chisel  stones  like  his  sons,  but  Caesar  needs  soldiers, 
and  among  all  the  Amalekites,  nay  among  the  Ro- 
mans in  the  oasis,  I  saw  none  with  whom  I  might 
not  match  myself." 

While  thus  he  thought  he  stretched  his  limbs,  and 
struck  his  hands  on  his  broad  breast,  and  when  he 
was  asleep,  he  dreamed  of  the  wrestling  school,  and 
of  a  purple  robe  that  Paulus  held  out  to  him,  of  a 
wreath  of  poplar  leaves  that  rested  on  his  scented 
curls,  and  of  the  beautiful  woman  who  had  met  him 
on  the  stairs  of  the  Senator's  house. 


78  HOMO  SUM. 


CHAPTEE  Y. 

THANKS  to  the  Senator's  potion  Stephanas  soon 
fell  asleep.  Paulus  sat  near  him  and  did  not  stir ; 
he  held  his  breath,  and  painfully  suppressed  even  an 
impulse  to  cough,  so  as  not  to  disturb  the  sick  man's 
light  slumbers. 

An  hour  after  midnight  the  old  man  awoke,  and 
after  he  had  lain  meditating  for  some  time  with  his 
eyes  open,  he  said  thoughtfully, 

"  You  called  yourself  and  us  all  egotistic,  and  I 
certainly  am  so.  I  have  often  said  so  to  myself ;  not 
for  the  first  time  to-day,  but  for  weeks  past  since 
Hennas  came  back  from  Alexandria  and  seems  to 
have  forgotten  how  to  laugh.  He  is  not  happy, 
and  when  I  ask  myself  what  is  to  become  of  him. 
when  I  am  dead,  and  if  he  turns  from  the  Lord  and 
seeks  the  pleasures  of  the  world,  my  heart  sickens. 
I  meant  it  for  the  best  when  I  brought  him  with  me 
up  to  the  Holy  Mountain,  but  that  Avas  not  the  only 
motive — it  seemed  to  me  too  hard  to  part  altogether 
from  the  child.  My  God !  the  young  of  brutes  are 
secure  of  their  mother's  faithful  love,  and  his  never 
asked  for  him  when  she  fled  from  my  house  with  her 
seducer.  I  thought  he  should  at  least  not  lose  his 
father,  and  that  if  he  grew  up  far  away  from  the 


HOMO   SUM.  79 

world  he  would  be  spared  all  the  sorrow  that  it  had 
so  profusely  heaped  upon  me.  I  would  have  brought 
him  up  fit  for  Heaven,  and  yet  through  a  life  devoid 
of  suffering.  And  nqw — and  now  ?  If  he  is  miser- 
able it  will  be  through  me,  and  added  to  all  my  other 
troubles  comes  this  grief." 

"  You  have  sought  out  the  way  for  him,"  inter- 
rupted Paulus,  "  and  the  rest  will  be  sure  to  come ; 
he  loves  you  and  will  certainly  not  leave  you  so 
long  as  you  are  suffering." 

"Certainly  not?"  asked  the  sick  man  sadly. 
"  And  what  weapons  has  he  to  fight  through  life 
with?" 

"  You  gave  him  the  Saviour  for  a  guide  ;  that  is 
enough,"  said  Paulus  soothingly.  "There  is  no 
smooth  road  from  earth  to  Heaven,  and  none  can 
win  salvation  for  another." 

Stephanus  was  silent  for  a  long  time,  then  he  said, 

"  It  is  not  even  allowed  to  a  father  to  earn  the 
wretched  experience  of  life  for  his  son,  or  to  a 
teacher  for  his  pupil.  We  may  point  out  the  goal, 
but  the  way  thither  is  by  a  different  road  for  each 
of  us." 

"  And  we  may  thank  God  for  that,"  cried  Paulus. 
"  For  Hermas  has  been  started  on  the  road  which 
you  and  I  had  first  to  find  for  ourselves." 

"  You  and  I,"  repeated  the  sick  man  thoughtfully. 
"  Yes,  each  of  us  has  sought  his  own  way,  but  has 
inquired  only  which  was  his  own  way,  and  has 
never  concerned  himself  about  that  of  the  other. 
Self !  Self ! — How  many  years  we  have  dwelt  close 


80  HOMO   SUM. 

together,  and  I  have  never  felt  impelled  to  ask  you 
what  you  could  recall  to  mind  about  your  youth,  and 
how  you  were  led  to  grace.  I  learnt  by  accident 
that  you  were  an  Alexandrian,  and  had  been  a 
heathen,  and  had  suffered  ,much  for  the  faith,  and 
with  that  I  was  satisfied.  Indeed  you  do  not  seem 
very  ready  to  speak  of  those  long  past  days.  Our 
neighbor  should  be  as  dear  to  us  as  our  self,  and 
who  is  nearer  to  me  than  you  ?  Aye,  self  and  selfish- 
ness !  There  are  many  gulfs  on  the  road  towards 
God." 

"  I  have  not  much  to  tell,"  said  Paulus.  "  But  a 
man  never  forgets  what  he  once  has  been.  We  may 
cast  the  old  man  from  us,  and  believe  we  have 
shaken  ourselves  free,  when  lo !  it  is  there  again  and 
greets  us  as  an  old  acquaintance.  If  a  frog  only  once 
comes  down  from  his  tree  he  hops  back  into  the 
pond  again." 

"  It  is  true,  memory  can  never  die  !  "  cried  the  sick 
man.  "  I  cannot  sleep  any  more ;  tell  me  about 
your  early  life  and  how  you  became  a  Christian. 
When  two  men  have  journeyed  by  the  same  road, 
and  the  moment  of  parting  is  at  hand,  they  are  fain 
to  ask  each  other's  name  and  where  they  came 
from." 

Paulus  gazed  for  some  time  into  space,  and  then 
he  began, 

"  The  companions  of  my  youth  called  me  Me- 
nander,  the  son  of  Herophilus.  Besides  that,  I  know 
for  certain  very  little  of  my  youth,  for  as  I  have 
already  told  you,  I  have  long  since  ceased  to  allow 


HOMO   SUM.  8 1 

myself  to  think  of  the  world.  He  who  abandons  a 
thing,  but  clings  to  the  idea  of  the  thing,  continues — 

"  That  sounds  like  Plato,"  said  Stephanus  with  a 
smile. 

"  All  that  Heathen  farrago  comes  back  to  me  to- 
day," cried  Paulus.  "  I  used  to  know  it  well,  and  I 
have  often  thought  that  his  face  must  have  resembled 
that  of  the  Saviour." 

"  But  only  as  a  beautiful  song  might  resemble  the 
voice  of  an  angel,"  said  Stephanus  somewhat  dryly. 
"  He  who  plunges  into  the  depths  of  philosophic 
systems — 

"That  never  was  quite  my  case,"  said  Paulus. 
"  I  did  indeed  go  through  the  whole  educational 
course ;  Grammar,  Rhetoric,  Dialectic,  and  Music — 

"And  Arithmetic,  Geometry,  and  Astronomy," 
added  Stephanus. 

"  Those  were  left  to  the  learned  many  years  since," 
continued  Paulus,  "  and  I  was  never  very  eager  for 
learning.  In  the  school  of  Rhetoric  I  remained  far 
behind  my  fellows,  and  if  Plato  was  dear  to  me  I 
owe  it  to  Pasdonomus  of  Athens,  a  worthy  man 
whom  my  father  engaged  to  teach  us." 

"  They  say  he  had  been  a  great  merchant,"  inter- 
rupted Stephanus.  "  Can  it  be  that  you  were  the 
son  of  that  rich  Herophilus,  whose  business  in  An- 
tioch  was  conducted  by  the  worthy  Jew  Urbib  ? " 

"  Yes,  indeed,"  replied  Paulus,  looking  down  at 

the  ground  in  some  confusion.     "  Our  mode  of  life 

was  almost  royal,  and  the  multitude  of  our  slaves 

quite  sinful.    When  I  look  back  OBL  all  the  vain  trifles 

6 


82  HOMO  SUM. 

that  my  father  had  to  care  for,  I  feel  quite  giddy. 
Twenty  sea-going  ships  in  the  harbor  of  Eunostus, 
and  eighty  Nile-boats  on  Lake  Mareotis  belonged  to 
him.  His  profits  on  the  manufacture  of  papyrus 
might  have  maintained  a  city-full  of  poor.  But  we 
needed  our  revenues  for  other  things.  Our  Cyrae- 
nian  horses  stood  in  marble  stalls,  and  the  great  hall, 
in  which  my  father's  friends  were  wont  to  meet,  was 
like  a  temple.  But  you  see  how  the  world  takes 
possession  of  us,  when  we  begin  to  think  about  it ! 
Rather  let  us  leave  the  past  in  peace.  You  want 
me  to  tell  you  more  of  myself  ?  "Well ;  my  child- 
hood passed  like  that  of  a  thousand  other  rich 
citizens'  sons,  only  my  mother,  indeed,  was  excep- 
tionally beautiful  and  sweet,  and  of  angelic  good- 
ness." 

"  Every  child  thinks  his  own  mother  the  best  of 
mothers,"  murmured  the  sick  man. 

"  Mine  certainly  was  the  best  to  me,"  cried  Paulus. 
"  And  yet  she  was  a  heathen.  "When  my  father  hurt 
me  with  severe  words  of  blame,  she  always  had  a 
kind  word  and  loving  glance  for  me.  There  was 
little  enough,  indeed,  to  praise  in  me.  Learning 
was  utterly  distasteful  to  me,  and  even  if  I  had  done 
better  at  school,  it  would  hardly  have  counted  for 
much  to  my  credit,  for  my  brother  Apollonius,  who 
was  about  a  year  younger  than  I,  learned  all  the 
most  difficult  things  as  if  they  were  mere  child's 
play,  and  in  dialectic  exercises  there  soon  was  no 
rhetorician  in  Alexandria  who  could  compete  with 
l|imf  Ko  system  was  unknown  to  him,  and  though 


HOMO  SUM.  83 

no  one  ever  knew  of  his  troubling  himself  particu- 
larly to  study,  he  nevertheless  was  master  of  many 
departments  of  learning.  There  were  but  two  things 
in  which  I  could  beat  him — in  music,  and  in  all  ath- 
letic exercises ;  while  he  was  studying  and  disputing 
I  was  winning  garlands  in  the  palaestra.  But  at 
that  time  the  best  master  of  rhetoric  and  argument 
was  the  best  man,  and  my  father,  who  himself  could 
shine  in  the  senate  as  an  ardent  and  elegant  orator, 
looked  upon  me  as  a  half  idiotic  ne'er-do-weel,  until 
one  day  a  learned  client  of  our  house  presented  him 
with  a  pebble  on  which  was  carved  an  epigram  to 
this  effect :  "  He  who  would  see  the  noblest  gifts  of 
the  Greek  race,  should  visit  the  house  of  Herophilus, 
for  there  he  might  admire  strength  and  vigor  of 
body  in  Menander,  and  the  same  qualities  of  mind 
in  Apollonius."  These  lines,  which  were  written 
in  the  form  of  a  lute,  passed  from  mouth  to  mouth, 
and  gratified  my  father's  ambition  ;  from  that  time 
he  had  words  of  praise  for  me  when  my  quadriga 
won  the  race  in  the  Hippodrome,  or  when  I  came 
home  crowned  from  the  wrestling-ring,  or  the 
singing-match.  My  whole  life  was  spent  in  the  baths 
and  the  palaastra,  or  in  gay  feasting." 

"  I  know  it  all,"  exclaimed  Stephanus  interrupting 
him,  "  and  the  memory  of  it  all  often  disturbs  me. 
Did  you  find  it  easy  to  banish  these  images  from 
your  mind  ? " 

"At  first  I  had  a  hard  fight,"  sighed  Paulus. 
"  But  for  some  time  now,  since  I  have  passed  my 
fortieth  year,  the  temptations  of  the  world  torment 


84    f  HOMO   SUM. 

me  less  often.  Only  I  must  keep  out  of  the  way  of 
the  carriers  who  bring  fish  from  the  fishing  towns  on 
the  sea,  and  from  Ra'ithu  to  the  oasis." 

Stephanus  looked  inquiringly  at  the  speaker,  and 
Paulus  went  on : 

"  Yes,  it  is  very  strange.  I  may  see  men  or  women 
— the  sea  yonder  or  the  mountain  here,  without  ever 
thinking  of  Alexandria,  but  only  of  sacred  things ; 
when  the  savor  of  fish  rises  up  to  my  nostrils  I  see 
the  market  and  fish  stalls  and  the  oysters — 

"  Those  of  Kanopus  are  famous,"  interrupted 
Stephanus,  "  they  make  little  pasties  there—"  Paulus 
passed  the  back  of  his  hand  over  his  bearded  lips, 
exclaiming,  "  At  the  shop  of  the  fat  cook— Phile- 
mon— in  the  street  of  Herakleotis." 

But  he  broke  off,  and  cried  with  an  impulse  of 
shame,  "  It  were  better  that  I  should  cease  telling 
of  my  past  life.  The  day  does  not  dawn  yet,  and 
you  must  try  to  sleep." 

"  I  cannot  sleep,"  sighed  Stephanus,  "  if  you  love 
me  go  on  with  your  story," 

"  But  do  not  interrupt  me  again  then,"  said 
Paulus,  and  he  went  on : 

"  With  all  this  gay  life  I  was  not  happy — by  no 
means.  When  I  was  alone  sometimes,  and  no  longer 
sitting  in  the  crowd  of  merry  boon-companions  and 
complaisant  wenches,  emptying  the  wine  cup  and 
crowned  with  poplar,  I  often  felt  as  if  I  were  walk- 
ing on  the  brink  of  a  dark  abyss — as  if  every  thing 
in  myself  and  around  me  were  utterly  hollow  and 
empty,  I  could  stand  gazing  for  hours  at  the  sea, 


HOMO   SUM.  85 

and  as  the  waves  rose  only  to  sink  again  and  vanish, 
I  often  reflected  that  I  was  like  them,  and  that  the 
future  of  my  frivolous  present  must  be  a  mere 
empty  nothing.  Our  gods  were  of  little  account 
with  us.  My  mother  sacrificed  now  in  one  temple, 
and  now  in  another,  according  to  the  needs  of  the 
moment ;  my  father  took  part  in  the  high  festivals, 
but  he  laughed  at  the  belief  of  the  multitude,  and 
my  brother  talked  of  the  'PrimEeval  Unity,'  and 
dealt  with  all  sorts  of  demons,  and  magic  formulas. 
He  accepted  the  doctrine  of  lamblichus,  Ablavius, 
and  the  other  Neoplatonic  philosophers,  which  to 
my  poor  understanding  seemed  either  superhumanly 
profound  or  else  debasingly  foolish ;  nevertheless 
my  memory  retains  many  of  his  sayings,  which  I 
have  learned  to  understand  here  in  my  loneliness. 
It  is  vain  to  seek  reason  outside  ourselves ;  the  high- 
est to  which  we  can  attain  is  for  reason  to  behold 
itself  in  us !  As  often  as  the  world  sinks  into  noth- 
ingness in  my  soul,  and  I  live  in  God  only,  and  have 
Him,  and  comprehend  Him,  and  feel  Him  only — 
then  that  doctrine  recurs  to  me.  How  all  these 
fools  sought  and  listened  everywhere  for  the  truth 
which  was  being  proclaimed  in  their  very  ears! 
There  were  Christians  everywhere  about  me,  and  at 
that  time  they  had  no  need  to  conceal  themselves, 
but  I  had  nothing  to  do  with  them.  Twice  only 
did  they  cross  my  path ;  once  I  was  not  a  little  an- 
noyed when,  on  the  Hippodrome,  a  Christian's 
horses  which  had  been  blessed  by  a  Nazarite,  beat 
mine  :  and  on  another  occasion  it  seemed  strange  to 


86  HOMO  SUM. 

me  when  I  myself  received  the  blessing  of  an  old 
Christian  dock-laborer,  having  pulled  his  son  out  of 
the  water. 

"  Years  went  on  ;  my  parents  died.  My  mother's 
last  glance  was  directed  at  me,  for  I  had  always 
been  her  favorite  child.  They  said  too  that  I  was 
like  her,  I  and  my  sister  Arsinoe,  who,  soon  after 
my  father's  death,  married  the  Prefect  Pompey. 
At  the  division  of  the  property  I  gave  up  to  my 
brother  the  manufactories  and  the  management  of 
the  business,  nay  even  the  house  in  the  city,  though, 
as  the  elder  brother,  I  had  a  right  to  it,  and  I  took 
in  exchange  the  land  near  the  Kanopic  gate,  and 
filled  the  stables  there  with  splendid  horses,  and  the 
lofts  with  not  less  noble  wine.  This  I  needed,  be- 
cause I  gave  up  the  days  to  baths  and  contests  in 
the  arena,  and  the  nights  to  feasting,  sometimes  at 
my  own  house,  sometimes  at  a  friend's,  and  some- 
times in  the  taverns  of  Kanopus,  where  the  fairest 
Greek  girls  seasoned  the  feasts  with  singing  and 
dancing. 

"  What  have  these  details  of  the  vainest  worldly 
pleasure  to  do  with  my  conversion,  you  will  ask. 
But  listen  a  while.  When  Saul  went  forth  to  seek 
his  father's  asses  he  found  a  crown. 

"  One  day  we  had  gone  out  in  our  gilded  boats, 
and  the  Lesbian  girl  Archidike  had  made  ready 
a  feast  for  us  in  her  house,  a  feast  such  as  could 
scarcely  be  offered  even  in  Rome. 

"  Since  the  taking  of  our  city  by  Diocletian,  after 
the  insurrection  of  Achilleus,  the  Imperial  troops 


HOMO  SUM.  87 

who  came  to  Alexandria  behaved  insolently  enough. 
Between  some  of  my  friends,  and  certain  of  the 
young  officers  of  Koman  patrician  families,  there 
had  been  a  good  deal  of  rough  banter  for  some 
months  past,  as  to  their  horses,  women — I  know 
not  what ;  and  it  happened  that  We  met  these  very 
gentry  at  the  house  of  Archidike. 

"  Sharp  speeches  were  made,  which  the  soldiers 
replied  to  after  their  fashion,  and  at  last  they  came 
to  insulting  words,  and  as  the  wine  heated  us  and 
them  to  loud  threats. 

"  The  Romans  left  the  house  of  entertainment  be- 
fore we  did.  CroAvned  with  garlands,  singing  and 
utterly  careless,  we  followed  soon  after  them,  and 
had  almost  reached  the  quay,  when  a  noisy  troop 
rushed  out  of  a  side  street,  and  fell  upon  us  with 
naked  weapons.  The  moon  was  high  in  the  heavens, 
and  I  could  recognize  some  of  our  adversaries.  I 
threw  myself  on  a  tall  tribune,  throttled  him,  and  as 
he  fell,  I  fell  with  him  in  the  dust ;  I  am  but  dimly 
conscious  of  what  followed,  for  sword-strokes  were 
showered  upon  me,  and  all  grew  black  before  my 
eyes.  I  only  know  what  I  thought  then,  face  to 
face  with  death." 

"Well—?"  asked  Stephanus. 

"  I  thought,"  said  Paulus  reddening,  "  of  my  fight- 
ing-quails of  Alexandria,  and  whether  they  had  had 
any  water.  Then  my  dull  heavy  unconsciousness 
increased  ;  for  weeks  I  lay  in  that  state,  for  I  was 
hacked  like  sausage-meat ;  I  had  twelve  wounds,  not 
counting  the  slighter  ones,  and  any  one  else  would 


88  HOMO  SUM. 

have  died  of  any  one  of  them.  You  have  often  won- 
dered at  my  scars." 

"  And  whom  did  the  Lord  choose  then  to  be  the 
means  of  your  salvation  ?  " 

"  "When  I  recovered  my  senses,"  continued  Pau- 
lus,  "  I  was  lying  in  a  large  clean  room  behind  a  cur- 
tain of  light  material ;  I  could  not  raise  myself,  but 
just  as  if  I  had  been  sleeping  so  many  minutes  in- 
stead of  days,  I  thought  again  directly  of  my  quails. 
In  their  last  fight  my  best  cock  had  severely  handled 
handsome  Mkander's.  and  yet  he  wanted  to  dispute 
the  stakes  with  me,  but  I  would  assert  my  rights  ! 
At  least  the  quails  should  fight  again,  and  if  Mkan- 
der  should  refuse  I  would  force  him  to  fight  me  with 
his  fists  in  the  Palaestra,  and  give  him  a  blue  re- 
minder of  his  debt  on  the  eye.  My  hands  were  still 
weak,  and  yet  I  clenched  them  as  I  thought  of  the 
vexatious  affair.  "  I  will  punish  him,"  I  muttered 
to  myself. 

"  Then  I  heard  the  door  of  the  room  open,  and  I  saw 
three  men  respectfully  approaching  a  fourth.  He 
greeted  them  with  dignity,  but  yet  with  friendliness, 
and  rolled  up  a  scroll  which  he  had  been  reading.  I 
would  have  called  out,  but  I  could  not  open  my 
parched  lips,  and  yet  I  saw  and  heard  all  that  was 
going  on  around  me  in  the  room. 

"  It  all  seemed  strange  enough  to  me  then  ;  even 
the  man's  mode  of  greeting  was  unusual.  I  soon 
perceived  that  he  who  sat  in  the  chair  was  a  judge, 
and  that  the  others  had  come  as  complainants ;  they 
were  all  three  old  and  poor,  but  some  good  men  had 


HOMO  SUM.  89 

left  them  the  use  and  interest  of  a  piece  of  land. 
During  seed-time  one  of  them,  a  fine  old  man  with 
long  white  hair,  had  been  ill,  and  he  had  not  been 
able  to  help  in  the  harvest  either  ;  '  and  now  they 
want  to  withhold  his  portion  of  the  corn,'  thought  I ; 
but  it  was  quite  otherwise.  The  two  men  who  were 
in  health  had  taken  a  third  part  of  the  produce  to  the 
house  of  the  sick  man,  and  he  obstinately  refused  to 
accept  the  corn  because  he  had  helped  neither  to 
sow  nor  to  reap  it,  and  he  demanded  of  the  judge 
that  he  should  signify  to  the  other  two  that  he 
had  no  right  to  receive  goods  which  he  had  not 
earned. 

"  The  judge  had  so  far  kept  silence.  But  he  now 
raised  his  sagacious  and  kindly  face  and  asked  the 
old  man, '  Did  you  pray  for  your  companions  and 
for  the  increase  of  their  labors  ?  " 

"  '  I  did,'  replied  the  other. 

" '  Then  by  your  intercession  you  helped  them,' 
the  judge  decided,  '  and  the  third  part  of  the  pro- 
duce is  yours  and  you  must  keep  it.' 

"  The  old  man  bowed,  and  the  three  men  shook 
hands,  and  in  a  few  minutes  the  judge  was  alone  in 
the  room  again. 

"  I  did  not  know  what  had  come  over  me ;  the 
complaint  of  the  men  and  the  decision  of  the  judge 
seemed  to  me  senseless,  and  yet  both  the  one  and  the 
other  touched  my  heart.  I  went  to  sleep  again, 
and  when  I  awoke  refreshed  the  next  morning  the 
judge  came  up  to  me  and  gave  me  medicine,  not  only 
for  my  body  but  also  for  my  soul,  which  certainly 


0d  HOMO  SUM. 

was  not  less  in  need  of  it  than  my  poor  wounded 
limbs." 

"  Who  was  the  judge  ?  "  asked  Stephanus. 

"  Eusebius,  the  Presbyter  of  Kanopus.  Some 
Christians  had  found  me  half  dead  on  the  road,  and 
had  carried  me  into  his  house,  for  tho  widow  Theo- 
dora, his  sister,  was  the  deaconess  of  the  town. 
The  two  had  nursed  me  as  if  I  were  their  dearest 
brother.  It  was  not  till  I  grew  stronger  that  they 
showed  me  the  cross  and  the  crown  of  thorns  of 
Him  who  for  my  sake  also  had  taken  upon  Him 
such  far  more  cruel  suffering  than  mine,  and  they 
taught  me  to  love  His  wounds,  and  to  bear  my  own 
with  submission.  In  the  dry  wood  of  despair  soon 
budded  green  shoots  of  hope,  and  instead  of  anni- 
hilation at  the  end  of  this  life  they  showed  me 
Heaven  and  all  its  joys. 

"  I  became  a  new  man,  and  before  me  there  lay 
in  the  future  an  eternal  and  blessed  existence ;  after 
this  life  I  now  learned  to  look  forward  to  Eternity. 
The  gates  of  Heaven  were  wide  open  before  me, 
and  I  was  baptized  at  Kanopus. 

"  In  Alexandria  they  had  mourned  for  me  as  dead, 
and  my  sister  Arsinoe,  as  heiress  to  my  property, 
.  had  already  moved  into  my  country-house  with  her 
husband,  the  prefect.  I  willingly  left  her  there, 
and  now  lived  again  in  the  city,  in  order  to  support 
the  brethren,  as  the  persecutions  had  begun  again. 

"  This  was  easy  for  me,  as  through  my  brother- 
in-law  I  could  visit  all  the  prisons ;  at  last  I  was 
obliged  to  confess  the  faith,  and  I  suffered  much  on 


HOMO  SUM.  91 

the  rack  and  in  the  porphyry  quarries ;  but  every 
pain  was  dear  to  me,  for  it  seemed  to  bring  me 
nearer  to  the  goal  of  my  longings,  and  if  I  find 
aught  to  complain  of  up  here  on  the  Holy  Mountain, 
it  is  only  that  the  Lord  deems  me  unworthy  to  suffer 
harder  things,  when  his  beloved  and  only  son  took 
such  bitter  torments  on  himself  for  me  and  for  every 
wretched  sinner." 

"  Ah  !  saintly  man  !  "  murmured  Stephanus  de- 
voutly kissing  Paulus'  sheep-skin  ;  but  Paulus  pulled 
it  from  him,  exclaiming  hastily, 

"  Cease,  pray  cease — he  who  approaches  me  with 
honors  now  in  this  life  throws  a  rock  in  my  way 
to  the  life  of  the  blessed.  Now  I  will  go  to  the  spring 
and  fetch  you  some  fresh  water." 

When  Paulus'  returned  with  the  water-jar  he 
found  Ilermas,  who  had  come  to  wish  his  father 
good-morning  before  he  went  down  to  the  oasis  to 
fetch  some  new  medicine  from  the  Senator. 


92  HOMO  SUM. 


CHAPTEE  VI. 

SIKONA  was  sitting  at  the  open  window  of  her  bed- 
room, having  her  hair  arranged  by  a  black  woman 
that  her  husband  had  bought  in  Rome.  She  sighed, 
while  the  slave  lightly  touched  the  shining  tresses 
here  and  there  with  perfumed  oil  which  she  had 
poured  into  the  palm  of  her  hand ;  then  she  firmly 
grasped  the  long  thick  waving  mass  of  golden  hair 
and  was  parting  it  to  make  a  plait,  when  Sirona 
stopped  her,  saying,  "  Give  me  the  mirror." 

For  some  minutes  she  looked  with  a  melancholy 
gaze  at  the  image  in  the  polished  metal,  then  she 
sighed  again ;  she  picked  up  the  little  greyhound 
that  lay  at  her  feet,  and  placing  it  in  her  lap,  showed 
the  animal  its  image  in  the  mirror. 

"  There,  poor  lambe,"  she  said,  "  if  we  two,  inside 
these  four  walls,  want  to  see  anything  like  a  pleas- 
ing sight  we  must  look  at  ourselves." 

Then  she  went  on,  turning  to  the  slave.  "  How 
the  poor  little  beast  trembles !  I  believe  it  longs  to 
be  back  again  at  Arelas,  and  is  afraid  we  shall  linger 
too  long  under  this  burning  sky.  Give  me  my 
sandals." 

The  black  woman  reached  her  mistress  two  little 
slippers  with  gilt  ornaments  on  the  slight  straps,  but 


HOMO   SUM.  93 

Sirona  flung  her  hair  off  her  face  with  the  back  of 
her  hand,  exclaiming,  "  The  old  ones,  not  these. 
Wooden  shoes  even  would  do  here." 

And  with  these  words  she  pointed  to  the  court- 
yard under  the  window,  which  was  in  fact  as  ill  con- 
trived, as  though  gilt  sandals  had  never  yet  trodden 
it.  It  was  surrounded  by  buildings  ;  on  one  side  was 
a  wall  with  a  gateway,  and  on  the  others  buildings 
which  formed  a  sharply  bent  horseshoe. 

Opposite  the  wing  in  which  Sirona  and  her  hus- 
band had  found  a  home,  stood  the  much  higher  house 
of  Petrus,  and  both  had  attached  to  them,  in  the 
background  of  the  court-yard,  sheds  constructed  of 
rough  reddish  brown  stones,  and  covered  with  a 
thatch  of  palm-branches ;  in  these  the  agricultural 
implements  were  stored,  and  the  Senator's  slaves 
lived.  In  front  lay  a  heap  of  black  charcoal,  which 
was  made  on  the  spot  by  burning  the  wood  of  the 
thorny  sajal — a  species  of  acacia  ;  and  there  too  lay 
a  goodly  row  of  well-smoothed  mill-stones,  which 
were  shaped  in  the  quarry,  and  exported  to  Egypt. 
At  this  early  hour  the  whole  unlovely  domain  lay  in 
deep  shadow,  and  was  crowded  with  fowls  and 
pigeons.  Sirona's  window  alone  was  touched  by  the 
morning  sun.  If  she  could  have  known  what  a 
charm  the  golden  light  shed  over  her  figure,  on  her 
rose  and  white  face,  and  her  shining  hair,  she  would 
have  welcomed  the  day-star,  instead  of  complaining 
that  it  had  too  early  waked  her  from  sleep — her  best 
comfort  in  her  solitude. 

Besides  a  few  adjoining  rooms  she  was  mistress  of 


94  HOMO   SUM. 

a  larger  room,  the  dwelling-room,  which  looked  out 
upon  the  street. 

She  shaded  her  eyes  with  her  hand,  exclaiming, 
"Oh!  the  wearisome  sun.  It  looks  at  us  the  first 
thing  in  the  morning  through  the  window ;  as  if  the 
day  were  not  long  enough.  The  beds  must  be  put 
in  the  front-room ;  I  insist  upon  it." 

The  slave  shook  her  head,  and  stammered  an  an- 
swer, "  Phcsbicius  will  not  have  it  so." 

Sirona's  eyes  flashed  angrily,  and  her  voice,  which 
was  particularly  sweet,  trembled  slightly  as  she 
asked,  "  What  is  wrong  with  him  again  ?  " 

"  lie  says,"  replied  the  slave,  "  that  the  Senator's 
son,  Polykarp,  goes  oftener  past  your  window  than 
altogether  pleases  him,  and  it  seems  to  him,  that 
you  occupy  yourself  more  than  is  necessary  with  his 
little  brothers  and  sisters,  and  the  other  children  up 
there." 

"  Is  he  still  in  there  ? "  asked  Sirona  with  glowing 
cheeks,  and  she  pointed  threateningly  to  the  dwell- 
ing room. 

"  The  master  is  out,"  stuttered  the  old  woman. 
"  He  went  out  before  sunrise.  You  are  not  wait  for 
breakfast,  he  will  not  return  till  late." 

The  Gaulish  lady  made  no  answer,  but  her  head  fell, 
and  the  "deepest  melancholy  overspread  her  features. 

The  greyhound  seemed  to  feel  for  the  troubles  of 
his  mistress,  for  he  fawned  upon  her,  as  if  to  kiss 
her.  The  solitary  woman  pressed  the  little  creature, 
which  had  come  with  her  from  her  home,  closely  to 
her  bosom  5  for  an  unwonted  sense  of  wretchedness 


HOMO  SUM.  95 

weighed  upon  her  heart,  and  she  felt  as  lonely, 
friendless,  and  abandoned,  as  if  she  were  driving 
alone — alone — over  a  wide  and  shoreless  sea.  She 
shuddered,  as  if  she  were  cold —  for  she  thought  of 
her  husband,  the  man  who  here  in  the  desert  should 
have  been  all  in  all  to  her,  but  whose  presence  tilled 
her  with  aversion,  whose  indifference  had  ceased  to 
wound  her,  and  whose  tenderness  she  feared  far 
more  than  his  wild  irritability — she  had  never  loved 
him. 

She  had  grown  up  free  from  care  among  a  num- 
ber of  brothers  and  sisters.  Her  father  had  been 
the  chief  accountant  of  the  decurions'  college  in  his 
native  town,  and  he  had  lived  opposite  the  Circus 
where,  being  of  a  stern  temper,  he  had  never  per- 
mitted his  daughters  to  look  on  at  the  games ;  but 
he  could  not  prevent  their  seeing  the  crowd  stream- 
ing into  the  amphitheatre,  or  hearing  their  shouts 
of  delight,  and  their  eager  cries  of  approbation. 

Sirona  thus  grew  up  in  the  presence  of  other  peo- 
ple's pleasure,  and  in  a  constantly  revived  and  never 
satisfied  longing  to  share  it;  she  had,  indeed,  no 
time  for  unnecessary  occupations,  for  her  mother 
died  before  she  was  fully  grown  up,  and  she  was 
compelled  to  take  charge  of  the  eight  younger  chil- 
dren. This  she  did  in  all  fidelity,  but  in  her  hours 
of  leisure  she  loved  to  listen  to  the  stories  told  her 
by  the  wives  of  officials  who  had  seen  and  could 
praise  the  splendors  of  Eome  the  golden. 

She  knew  that  she  was  fair,  for  she  need  only  go 
outside  the  house  to  hear  it  said ;  but  though  she 


96  HOMO   SUM. 

longed  to  see  the  capital,  it  was  not  for  the  sake  of 
being  admired,  but  because  there  was  there  so  much 
that  was  splendid  to  see  and  to  admire.  So,  when 
the  Centurion  Phcebicius,  the  commandant  of  the 
garrison  of  her  native  town,  was  transferred  to  Rome, 
and  when  he  desired  to  take  the  seventeen-years-old 
girl  with  him  to  the  Imperial  city,  as  his  wife — she 
was  more  than  forty  years  younger  than  he — she 
followed  him  full  of  hope  and  eager  anticipation. 

Not  long  after  their  marriage  she  started  for 
Rome  by  sea  from  Massilia,  accompanied  by  an  old 
relative ;  and  he  went  by  land  at  the  head  of  his 
cohorts. 

She  reached  their  destination  long  before  her  hus- 
band, and  without  waiting  for  him,  but  constantly 
in  the  society  of  her  old  duenna,  she  gave  herself  up 
with  the  freedom  and  eagerness  of  her  fresh  youth 
to  the  delights  of  seeing  and  admiring. 

It  did  not  escape  her,  while  she  did  so,  that  she 
attracted  all  eyes  wherever  she  went,  and  however 
much  this  flattered  and  pleased  her  at  first,  it  spoilt 
many  of  her  pleasures,  when  the  Romans,  young  and 
old,  began  to  follow  and  court  her.  At  last  Phcebi- 
cius arrived,  and  when  he  found  his  house  crowded 
with  his  wife's  admirers  he  behaved  to  Sirona  as 
though  she  had  long  since  betrayed  his  honor. 

Nevertheless,  he  dragged  her  from  pleasure  to 
pleasure,  and  from  one  spectacle  to  another,  for  it 
gratified  him  to  show  himself  in  public  with  his 
beautiful  young  wife.  She  certainly  was  not  free 
from  frivolity,  but  she  ha<J  learned  early  from  her 


HOMO  SUM.  97 

strict  father,  as  being  the  guide  of  her  younger  sis- 
ters, to  distinguish  clearly  right  from  wrong,  and 
the  pure  from  the  unclean ;  and  she  soon  discovered 
that  the  joys  of  the  capital,  which  had  seemed  at 
first  to  be  gay  flowers  -with  bright  colors,  and  redo- 
lent with  intoxicating  perfume,  bloomed  on  the  sur- 
face of  a  foul  bog. 

She  at  first  had  contemplated  all  that  was  beauti- 
ful, pleasant,  and  characteristic  with  delight ;  but 
her  husband  took  pleasure  only  in  things  which 
revolted  her  as  being  common  and  abominable.  He 
watched  her  every  glance,  and  yet  he  pointed  nothing 
out  to  her,  but  what  was  hurtful  to  the  feelings  of  a 
pure  woman.  Pleasure  became  her  torment,  for  the 
sweetest  wine  is  repulsive  when  it  has  been  tasted  by 
impure  lips.  After  every  feast  and  spectacle  he 
loaded  her  with  outrageous  reproaches,  and  when  at 
last,  weary  of  such  treatment,  she  refused  to  quit  the 
house,  he  obliged  her  nevertheless  to  accompany 
him  as  often  as  the  Legate  Quintillus  desired  it. 
The  legate  was  his  superior-officer,  and  he  sent  her 
every  day  some  present  of  flowers. 

Up  to  this  time  she  had  borne  with  him,  and  had 
tried  to  excuse  him,  and  to  think  herself  answerable 
for  much  of  what  she  endured.  But  at  last — about 
ten  months  after  her  marriage — something  occurred 
between  her  and  Phcebicius — something  which  stood 
like  a  wall  of  brass  between  him  and  her ;  and  as 
this  something  had  led  to  his  banishment  to  the 
remote  oasis,  and  to  his  degradation  to  the  rank  of 
captain  of  a  miserable  maniple,  instead  of  his  obtain- 
7 


98  HOMO   SUM. 

ing  his  hoped  for  promotion,  he  began  to  torment 
her  systematically  while  she  tried  to  protect  herself 
by  icy  coldness ;  so  that  at  last  it  came  to  this,  that 
the  husband,  for  whom  she  felt  nothing  but  con- 
tempt, had  no  more  influence  on  her  life,  than  some 
physical  pain  which  a  sick  man  is  doomed  to  endure 
all  through  his  existence. 

In  his  presence  she  was  silent,  defiant  and  repellent, 
but  as  soon  as  he  quitted  her,  her  innate,  warm-heart- 
ed kindliness  and  child-like  merriment  woke  up  to 
new  life,  and  their  fairest  blossoms  opened  out  in  the 
Senator's  house  among  the  little  troop  who  amply 
repaid  her  love  with  theirs. 

Phcebicius  belonged  to  the  worshippers  of  Mithras, 
and  he  often  fasted  in  his  honor  to  the  point  of  ex- 
haustion, while  on  the  other  hand  he  frequently 
drank  with  his  boon-companions  at  the  feasts  of  the 
god  till  he  was  in  a  state  of  insensibility. 

Here  even,  in  Mount  Sinai,  he  had  prepared  a 
grotto  for  the  feast  of  Mithras,  had  gathered  together 
a  few  companions  in  his  faith,  and  when  it  happened 
that  he  remained  out  all  day  and  all  night,  and  came 
home  paler  even  than  usual,  she  well  knew  where  he 
had  been. 

Just  now  she  vividly  pictured  to  herself  the  person 
of  this  man  with  his  eyes,  that  now  were  dull  with 
sleep  and  now  glowed  with  rage,  and  she  asked  her- 
self whether  it  were  indeed  possible  that  of  her  own 
free  will  she  had  chosen  to  become  his  wife.  Her 
bosom  heaved  with  quicker  breathing  as  she  remem- 
bered the  ignominy  he  had  subjected  her  to  in  Rome, 


HOMO  SUM.  99 

and  she  clenched  her  small  hands.  At  this  instant 
the  little  dog  sprang  from  her  lap  and  flew  barking 
to  the  window-sill;  she  was  easily  startled,  and  she 
drew  on  her  morning-gown  which  had  slipped  from 
her  white  shoulders ;  then  she  fastened  the  straps  of 
her  sandals,  and  went  to  look  down  into  the  court- 
yard. 

A  smile  played  upon  her  lips  as  she  perceived  young 
Hennas,  who  had  already  been  for  some  time  leaning 
motionless  against  the  wall  of  the  house  opposite, 
and  devouring  with  his  gaze  the  figure  of  the  beauti- 
ful young  woman.  She  had  a  facile  and  volatile 
nature.  Like  the  eye  which  retains  no  impression 
of  the  disabling  darkness  so  soon  as  the  rays  of  light 
have  fallen  on  it,  no  gloom  of  suffering  touched  her 
so  deeply,  that  the  lightest  breath  of  a  new  pleasure 
could  not  blow  her  troubles  to  the  winds.  Many 
rivers  are  quite  different  in  color  at  their  source  and 
at  their  mouth,  and  so  it  was  often  with  her  tears ;  she 
began  to  weep  for  sorrow,  and  then  found  it  difficult 
to  dry  her  eyes  from  sheer  overflow  of  mirth.  It 
would  have  been  so  easy  for  Phcebicius  to  make  her 
lot  a  fair  one  1  for  she  had  a  most  susceptible  heart, 
and  was  grateful  for  the  smallest  proofs  of  love. 
But  between  him  and  her  every  bond  was  broken. 

The  form  and  face  of  Hernias  took  her  fancy  ;  she 
thought  he  looked  of  noble  birth  in  spite  of  his  poor 
clothing,  and  when  she  observed  that  his  cheeks  were 
glowing,  and  that  the  hand  in  which  he  held  the 
medicine  phial  trembled,  she  understood  that  he  was 
watching  her,  and  that  the  sight  of  her  had  stirred 


100  HOMO  SUM. 

his  youthful  blood.  A  woman — still  more  a  woman 
who  is  pleased  to  please — forgives  any  sin  that  is 
committed  for  her  beauty's  sake,  and  Sirona's  voice 
had  a  friendly  ring  in  it  as  she  bid  Hermas  good- 
morning  and  asked  him  how  his  father  was,  and 
whether  the  Senator's  medicine  had  been  of  service. 
The  youth's  answers  were  short  and  confused,  but 
his  looks  betrayed  that  he  would  fain  have  said  quite 
other  things  than  those  which  his  indocile  tongue 
allowed  him  to  reiterate  timidly. 

"Dame  Dorothea  was  telling  me  last  evening," 
she  said  kindly,  "  that  Petrus  had  every  hope  of  your 
father's  recovery,  but  that  he  is  still  very  weak. 
Perhaps  some  good  wine  would  be  of  service  to  him 
— not  to-day  but  to-morrow  or  the  day  after.  Only 
come  to  me  if  you  need  it ;  we  have  some  old  Faler- 
nian  in  the  loft,  and  white  Mareotis  wine,  which  is 
particularly  good  and  wholesome." 

Hermas  thanked  her,  and  as  she  still  urged  him  to 
apply  to  her  in  all  confidence,  he  took  courage  and 
succeeded  in  stammering  rather  than  saying,  "  You 
are  as  good  as  you  are  beautiful." 

The  words  were  hardly  spoken  when  the  topmost 
stone  of  an  elaborately  constructed  pile  near  the 
slaves'  house  fell  down  with  a  loud  clatter.  Sirona 
started  and  drew  back  from  the  window,  the  grey- 
hound set  up  a  loud  barking,  and  Hernias  struck  his 
forehead  with  his  hand  as  if  he  were  roused  from  a 
dream. 

In  a  few  instants  he  had  knocked  at  the  Senator's 
door ;  hardly  had  he  entered  the  house  when  Miriam's 


HOMO   SUM.  IOI 

slight  form  passed  across  behind  the  pile  of  stones, 
and  vanished  swiftly  and  silently  into  the  slaves' 
quarters.  These  were  by  this  time  deserted  by  their 
inhabitants,  who  were  busy  in  the  field,  the  house, 
or  the  quarries ;  they  consisted  of  a  few  ill-lighted 
rooms  with  bare,  unfinished  walls. 

The  shepherdess  went  into  the  smallest,  where,  on 
a  bed  of  palm-sticks,  lay  the  slave  that  she  had 
wounded,  and  who  turned  over  as  with  a  hasty  hand 
she  promptly  laid  a  fresh  but  ill-folded  bandage  all 
askew  on  the  deep  wound  in  his  head.  As  soon  as 
this  task  was  fulfilled  she  left  the  room  again, 
placed  herself  behind  the  half  open  door  which  led 
into  the  court-yard,  and,  pressing  her  brow  against 
the  stone  door-post,  looked  first  at  the  Senator's 
house  and  then  at  Sirona's  window,  while  her  breath 
came  faster  and  faster. 

A  new  and  violent  emotion  was  stirring  her  young 
soul ;  not  many  minutes  since  she  had  squatted  peace- 
fully on  the  ground  by  the  side  of  the  wounded  man, 
with  her  head  resting  on  her  hand  and  thinking  of 
her  goats  on  the  mountain.  Then  she  had  heard  a 
slight  sound  in  the  court,  which  any  one  else  would 
not  have  noticed  ;  but  she  not  only  perceived  it,  but 
knew  with  perfect  certainty  with  whom  it  originated. 
She  could  never  fail  to  recognize  Hernias'  footstep, 
and  it  had  an  irresistible  effect  upon  her.  She 
raised  her  head  quickly  from  her  hand  and  her  el- 
bow from  the  knee  on  which  it  was  resting,  sprang 
to  her  feet  and  went  out  into  the  yard.  She  was 
hidden  by  the  mill-stones,  but  she  could  see  Hermas 


IO2  HOMO   SUM. 

lost  in  admiration.  She  followed  the  direction  of 
his  eye  and  saw  the  same  image  which  had  fascinated 
his  gaze — Sirona's  lovely  form,  flooded  with  sunlight. 
She  looked  as  if  formed  out  of  snow,  and  roses,  and 
gold,  like  the  angel  at  the  Sepulchre  in  the  new 
picture  in  the  church.  Yes,  just  like  the  angel,  and 
the  thought  flew  through  her  mind  how  brown  and 
black  she  was  herself,  and  that  he  had  called  her  a 
she-devil.  A  sense  of  deep  pain  came  over  her,  she 
felt  as  though  paralyzed  in  body  and  soul ;  but  soon 
she  shook  off  the  spell,  and  her  heart  began  to  beat 
violently ;  she  had  to  bite  her  lip  hard  with  her  white 
teeth  to  keep  herself  from  crying  out  with  rage  and 
anguish. 

How  she  wished  that  she  could  swing  herself  up 
to  the  window  on  which  Hernias'  gaze  was  fixed, 
and  clutch  Sirona's  golden  hair  and  tear  her  down  to 
the  ground,  and  suck  the  very  blood  from  her  red 
lips  like  a  vampire,  till  she  lay  at  her  feet  as  pale  as 
the  corpse  of  a  man  dead  of  thirst  in  the  desert. 
Then  she  saw  the  light  mantle  slip  from  Sirona's 
shoulders,  and  observed  Hermas  start  and  press  his 
hand  to  his  heart. 

Then  another  impulse  seized  her.  It  was  to  call 
to  her  and  warn  her  of  his  presence ;  for  even  women 
who  hate  each  other  hold  out  the  hand  of  fellowship 
in  the  spirit,  when  the  sanctity  of  woman's  modesty 
is  threatened  with  danger.  She  blushed  for  Sirona 
and  had  actually  opened  her  lips  to  call,  when  the 
greyhound  barked  and  the  dialogue  began.  Wot  a 
word  escaped  her  sharp  ears,  and  when  he  told  Si- 


HOMO   SUM.  103 

rona  that  she  was  as  good  as  she  was  beautiful  she 
felt  seized  with  giddiness ;  then  the  topmost  stone, 
by  which  she  had  tried  to  steady  herself,  lost  its 
balance,  its  fall  interrupted  their  conversation,  and 
Miriam  returned  to  the  sick  man. 

Now  she  was  standing  at  the  door,  waiting  for 
Hermas.  Long,  long  did  she  wait ;  at  last  he  ap- 
peared with  Dorothea,  and  she  could  see  that  he 
glanced  up  again  at  Sirona ;  but  a  spiteful  smile 
passed  over  her  lips,  for  the  window  was  empty  and 
the  fair  form  that  he  had  hoped  to  see  again  had 
vanished. 

Sirona  was  now  sitting  at  her  loom  in  the  front- 
room,  whither  she  had  been  tempted  by  the  sound 
of  approaching  hoofs.  Polykarp  had  ridden  by  on 
his  father's  fine  horse,  had  greeted  her  as  he  passed, 
and  had  dropped  a  rose  on  the  road- way.  Half '  an 
hour  later  the  old  black  slave  came  to  Sirona,  who 
was  throwing  the  shuttle  through  the  warp  with  a 
skilful  hand. 

"  Mistress,"  cried  the  negress  with  a  hideous  grin ; 
the  lonely  woman  paused  in  her  work,  and  as  she 
looked  up  inquiringly  the  old  woman  gave  her  a 
rose.  Sirona  took  the  flower,  blew  away  the  road- 
side dust  that  had  clung  to  it,  rearranged  the  tumbled 
delicate  petals  with  her  finger-tips,  and  said,  while 
she  seemed  to  give  the  best  part  of  her  attention  to 
this  occupation. 

"  For  the  future  let  roses  lie  where  you  find  them. 
You  know  Phcsbicius,  and  if  any  one  sees  it,  it  will 
be  talked  about." 


104  HOMO   SUM. 

The  black  woman  turned  away,  shrugging  her 
shoulders ;  but  Sirona  thought,  "  Polykarp  is  a  hand- 
some and  charming  man,  and  has  finer  and  more 
expressive  eyes  than  any  other  here,  if  he  were 
not  always  talking  of  his  plans,  and  drawings,  and 
figures,  and  mere  stupid  grave  things  that  I  do  not 
care  for  1 " 


HOMO  SUM.  105 


CHAPTEK  YII. 

THE  next  day,  after  the  sun  had  passed  the  merid- 
ian and  it  was  beginning  to  grow  cool,  Hermas  and 
Paulus  yielded  to  Stephanus'  wish  as  he  began  to 
feel  stronger,  and  carried  him  out  into  the  air.  The 
anchorites  sat  near  each  other  on  a  low  block  of 
stone,  which  Hermas  had  made  into  a  soft  couch  for 
his  father  by  heaping  up  a  high  pile  of  fresh  herbs. 
They  looked  after  the  youth,  who  had  taken  his  bow 
and  arrows,  as  he  went  up  the  mountain  to  hunt  a 
wild  goat ;  for  Petrus  had  prescribed  a  strengthen- 
ing diet  for  the  sick  man.  Not  a  word  was  spoken 
by  either  of  them  till  the  hunter  had  disappeared. 
Then  Stephanus  said, 

"  How  much  he  has  altered  since  I  have  been  ill. 
It  is  not  so  very  long  since  I  last  saw  him  by  the 
broad  light  of  day,  and  he  seems  meantime  to  have 
grown  from  a  boy  into  a  man.  How  self-possessed 
his  gait  is." 

Paulus,  looking  down  at  the  ground,  muttered 
some  words  of  assent.  He  remembered  the  discus- 
throwing  and  thought  to  himself,  "  The  Palestra 
certainly  sticks  in  his  mind,  and  he  has  been  bathing 
too;  and  yesterday,  when  he  came  up  from  the 
oasis,  he  strode  in  like  a  young  athlete." 


106  HOMO   SUM. 

That  friendship  only  is  indeed  genuine  when  two 
friends,  without  speaking  a  word  to  each  other,  can 
nevertheless  find  happiness  in  being  together.  Ste- 
phanus  and  Paulus  were  silent,  and  yet  a  tacit  inter- 
course subsisted  between  them  as  they  sat  gazing 
toward  the  west,  where  the  sun  was  near  its  setting. 

Far  below  them  gleamed  the  narrow,  dark  blue- 
green  streak  of  the  Red  Sea,  bounded  by  the  bare 
mountains  of  the  coast,  which  shone  in  a  shimmer 
of  golden  light.  Close  beside  them  rose  the  totter- 
ing crown  of  the  great  mountain  which,  so  soon  as 
the  day-star  had  sunk  behind  it,  appeared  edged  with 
a  ribbon  of  glowing  rubies.  The  flaming  glow 
flooded  the  western  horizon,  filmy  veils  of  mist 
floated  across  the  hilly  coast-line,  the  silver  clouds 
against  the  pure  sky  changed  their  hue  to  the  tender 
blush  of  a  newly  opened  rose,  and  the  undulating 
shore  floated  in  the  translucent  violet  of  the  amethyst. 
There  not  a  breath  of  air  was  stirring,  not  a  sound 
broke  the  solemn  stillness  of  the  evening.  !STot  till 
the  sea  was  taking  a  darker  and  still  darker  hue,  till 
the  glow  on  the  mountain  peaks  and  in  the  west 
had  begun  to  die  away,  and  the  night  to  spread  its 
shades  over  the  heights  and  hollows,  did  Stephanus 
unclasp  his  folded  hands  and  softly  speak  his  com- 
panion's name.  Paulus  started  and  said,  speaking 
like  a  man  who  is  aroused  from  a  dream  and  who  is 
suddenly  conscious  of  having  heard  some  one  speak, 
"You  are  right;  it  is  growing  dark  and  cool  and 
you  must  go  back  into  the  cave." 

Stephanus  offered  no  opposition  and  let  himself  be 


HOMO   SUM. 

led  back  to  his  bed  ;  while  Paulus  was  spreading  the 
sheep-skin  over  the  sick  man  he  sighed  deeply. 

"  What  disturbs  your  soul  ?  "  asked  the  older  man. 

"  It  is — it  was — what  good  can  it  do  me  ! "  cried 
Paulus  in  strong  excitement.  "  There  we  sat,  wit- 
nesses of  the  most  glorious  marvels  of  the  Most 
High,  and  I,  in  shameless  idolatry,  seemed  to  see 
before  me  the  chariot  of  Helios  with  its  glorious 
winged-horses,  snorting  fire  as  they  went,  and  Helios 
himself  in  the  guise  of  Hernias  with  gleaming  golden 
hair,  and  the  dancing  Hours,  and  the  golden  gates 
of  the  night.  Accursed  rabble  of  demons  !— 

At  this  point  the  anchorite  was  interrupted,  for 
Hernias  entered  the  cave,  and  laying  a  young  stein- 
bock  that  he  had  killed  before  the  two  men,  ex- 
claimed, "  A  fine  fellow,  and  he  cost  me  no  more 
than  one  arrow.  I  will  light  a  fire  at  once  and  roast 
the  best  pieces.  There  are  plenty  of  bucks  still  on 
our  mountain,  and  I  know  where  to  find  them." 

In  about  an  hour,  father  and  son  were  eating  the 
pieces  of  meat  which  had  been  cooked  on  a  spit. 
Paulus  declined  to  sup  with  them,  for  after  he  had 
scourged  himself  in  despair  and  remorse  for  the 
throwing  of  the  discus  he  had  vowed  a  strict  fast. 

"And  now,"  cried  Hermas,  when  his  father  de- 
clared himself  satisfied,  after  seeming  to  relish 
greatly  the  strong  meat  from  which  he  had  so  long 
abstained,  "  and  now  the  best  is  to  come !  In  this 
flask  I  have  some  strengthening  wine,  and  when  it 
is  empty  it  will  be  filled  afresh." 

Stephanus  took  the  wooden  beaker  that  his  son 


108  HOMO   SUM. 

offered  him,  drank  a  little,  and  then  said,  while  he 
smacked  his  tongue  to  relish  the  aftertaste  of  the 
noble  juice, 

"  That  is  something  choice ! — Syrian  wine  !  only 
taste  it,  Paulus." 

Paulus  took  the  beaker  in  his  hand,  inhaled  the 
fragrance  of  the  golden  fluid,  and  then  murmured, 
but  without  putting  it  to  his  lips, 

"  That  is  not  Syrian ;  it  is  Egyptian,  I  know  it 
well.  I  should  take  it  to  be  Mareotic." 

"  So  Sirona  called  it,"  cried  Hermas,  "  and  you 
know  it  by  the  mere  smell !  She  said  it  was  par- 
ticularly good  for  the  sick." 

"  That  it  is,"  Paulus  agreed ;  but  Stephanus  asked 
in  surprise,  "  Sirona  ?  who  is  she  ? " 

The  cave  was  but  dimly  lighted  by  fire  that  had 
been  made  at  the  opening,  so  that  the  two  anchorites 
could  not  perceive  that  Hermos  reddened  all  over 
as  he  replied, "  Sirona  ?  The  Gaulish  woman  Sirona  ? 
Do  you  not  know  her  ?  She  is  the  wife  of  the  cen- 
turion down  in  the  oasis." 

"  How  do  you  come  to  know  her  ? "  asked  his 
father. 

"  She  lives  in  Petrus'  house,"  replied  the  lad,  "  and 
as  she  had  heard  of  your  wound — " 

"Take  her  my  thanks  when  you  go  there  to- 
morrow morning,"  said  Stephanus.  "  To  her  and 
to  her  husband  too.  Is  he  a  Gaul  ?  " 

"  I  believe  so — nay,  certainly,"  answered  Hermas, 
"  they  call  him  the  lion,  and  he  is  no  doubt  a  Gaul." 

"When  the  lad  had  left  the  cave  the  old  man  laid 


HOMO   SUM.  109 

himself  down  to  rest,  and  Paulus  kept  watch  by 
him  on  his  son's  bed.  But  Stephanus  could  not 
sleep,  and  when  his  friend  approached  him  to  give 
him  some  medicine,  he  said.  "  The  wife  of  a  Gaul 
has  done  me  a  kindness,  and  yet  the  wine  would 
have  pleased  me  better  if  it  had  not  come  from  a 
Gaul." 

Paulus  looked  at  him  inquiringly,  and  though 
total  darkness  reigned  in  the  cave,  Stephanus  felt 
his  gaze  and  said, 

"  I  owe  no  man  a  grudge  and  I  love  my  neigh- 
bor. Great  injuries  have  been  done  me,  but  I  have 
forgiven — from  the  bottom  of  my  heart  forgiven. 
Only  one  man  lives  to  whom  I  wish  evil,  and  he  is  a 
Gaul." 

"  Forgive  him  too,"  said  Paulus,  "  and  do  not  let 
evil  thoughts  disturb  your  sleep." 

"  I  am  not  tired,"  said  the  sick  man,  "  and  if  you 
had  gone  through  such  things  as  I  have,  it  would 
trouble  your  rest  at  night  too." 

"  I  know,  I  know,"  said  Paulus  soothingly.  "  It 
was  a  Gaul  that  persuaded  your  wretched  wife  into 
quitting  your  house  and  her  child." 

"  And  I  loved,  oh !  how  I  loved  Glycera ! " 
groaned  the  old  man.  "  She  lived  like  a  princess, 
and  I  fulfilled  her  every  wish  before  it  was  uttered. 
She  herself  has  said  a  hundred  times  that  I  was  too 
kind  and  too  yielding,  and  that  there  was  nothing 
left  for  her  to  wish.  Then  the  Gaul  came  to  our 
house,  a  man  as  acrid  as  sour  wine,  but  with  a  fluent 
tongue  and  sparkling  eyes.  How  he  entangled 


IIO  HOMO   SUM. 

Glycera  I  know  not,  nor  do  I  want  to  know  ;  he 
shall  atone  for  it  in  hell.  For  the  poor  lost  woman 
I  pray  day  and  night.  A  spell  was  on  her  and  she 
left  her  heart  behind  in  my  house,  for  her  child  was 
there  and  she  loved  Ilermas  so  fondly  ;  indeed  she 
was  deeply  devoted  to  me.  Think  what  the  spell 
must  be  that  can  annihilate  a  mother's  love ! 
Wretch,  hapless  wretch  that  I  am  !  Did  you  ever 
love  a  woman,  Paulus  ? " 

"  You  ought  to  be  asleep,"  said  Paulus  in  a  warn- 
ing tone.  "  Who  ever  lived  nearly  half  a  century 
without  feeling  love  !  No\v  I  will  not  speak  another 
word,  and  you  must  take  this  drink  that  Petrus  has 
sent  for  you."  The  Senator's  medicine  was  potent, 
for  the  sick  man  fell  asleep  and  did  not  wake  till 
broad  day  lighted  up  the  cave. 

Paulus  was  still  sitting  on  his  bed,  and  after  they 
had  prayed  together,  he  gave  him  the  jar  which 
Hernias  had  filled  with  fresh  water  before  going 
down  to  the  oasis. 

"  I  feel  quite  strong,"  said  the  old  man.  "  The 
medicine  is  good ;  I  have  slept  well  and  dreamed 
sweetly ;  but  you  look  pale  and  as  if  you  had  not 
slept." 

"  I,"  said  Paulus,  "  I  lay  down  there  on  the  bed. 
Now  let  me  go  out  in  the  air  for  a  moment."  With 
these  words  he  went  out  of  the  cave. 

As  soon  as  he  was  out  of  sight  of  Stephanus  he 
drew  a  deep  breath,  stretched  his  limbs  and  rubbed 
his  burning  eyes ;  he  felt  as  if  there  was  sand 
gathered  under  their  lids,  for  he  had  forbidden  them 


HOMO  SUM.  Ill 

to  close  for  three  days  and  nights.  At  the  same 
time  he  was  consumed  by  a  violent  thirst,  for  neither 
food  nor  drink  had  touched  his  lips  for  the  same 
length  of  time.  His  hands  were  beginning  to 
tremble,  but  the  weakness  and  pain  that  he  experi- 
enced filled  him  with  silent  joy,  and  he  would  will- 
ingly have  retired  into  his  cave  and  have  indulged, 
not  for  the  first  time,  in  the  ecstatic  pain  of  hanging 
on  the  cross  and  bleeding  from  five  wounds  in  imita- 
tion of  the  Saviour. 

But  Stephanus  was  calling  him,  and  without  hesi- 
tation he  returned  to  him  and  replied  to  his  questions ; 
indeed  it  was  easier  to  him  to  speak  than  to  listen, 
for  in  his  ears  there  was  a  roaring,  moaning,  sing- 
ing, and  piping,  and  he  felt  as  if  drunk  with  strong 
wine. 

"  If  only  Hermas  does  not  forget  to  thank  the 
Gaul !  "  exclaimed  Stephanus. 

"  Thank — aye,  we  should  always  be  thankful !  " 
replied  his  companion,  closing  his  eyes. 

"  I  dreamed  of  Glycera,"  the  old  man  began  again. 
"  You  said  yesterday  that  love  had  stirred  your  heart 
too,  and  yet  you  never  were  married.  You  are 
silent?  Answer  me  something." 

"  I — who  called  me  ?  "  murmured  Paulus,  staring 
at  the  questioner  with  a  fixed  gaze. 

Stephanus  was  startled  to  see  that  his  companion 
trembled  in  every  limb,  he  raised  himself  and  held 
out  to  him  the  flask  with  Sirona's  wine,  which  the 
other,  incapable  of  controlling  himself,  snatched 
eagerly  from-  his  hand,  and  emptied  with  frantic 


112  HOMO   SUM. 

thirst.  The  fiery  liquor  revived  his  failing  strength, 
brought  the  color  to  his  cheeks,  and  lent  a  strange 
lustre  to  his  eyes.  "  How  much  good  that  has  done 
me ! "  he  cried  with  a  deep  sigh  and  pressing  his 
hands  on  his  breast. 

Stephanus  was  perfectly  reassured  and  repeated 
his  question,  but  he  almost  repented  of  his  curiosity, 
for  his  friend's  voice  had  an  utterly  strange  ring  in 
it  as  he  answered. 

"  No,  I  was  never  married — never,  but  I  have 
loved  for  all  that,  and  I  will  tell  you  the  story  from 
beginning  to  end ;  but  you  must  not  interrupt  me, 
no,  not  once.  I  am  in  as  trange  mood — perhaps  it 
is  the  wine.  I  had  not  drunk  any  for  so  long ;  I 
had  fasted  since — since — but  it  does  not  matter.  Be 
silent,  quite  silent,  and  let  me  tell  my  story." 

Paulus  sat  down  on  Hermas'  bed ;  he  threw  him- 
self far  back,  leaned  the  back  of  his  head  against  the 
rocky  wall  of  the  cavern  through  whose  doorway 
the  daylight  poured,  and  began  thus,  while  he  gazed 
fixedly  into  vacancy. 

"What  was  she  like? — who  can  describe  her? 
She  was  tall  and  large  like  Hera  and  yet  not  proud, 
and  her  noble  Greek  face  was  lovely  rather  than 
handsome. 

"  She  could  no  longer  have  been  very  young,  but 
she  had  eyes  like  those  of  a  gentle  child.  I  never 
knew  her  other  than  very  pale ;  her  narrow  fore- 
head shone  like  ivory  under  her  soft  brown  hair ; 
her  beautiful  hands  were  as  white  as  her  forehead- 
hands  that  moved  as  if  they  themselves  were  living 


HOMO   SUM.  113 

and  inspired  creatures  with  a  soul  and  language  of 
their  own.  When  she  folded  them  devoutly  to- 
gether it  seemed  as  if  they  were  putting  up  a  mute 
prayer.  She  was  pliant  in  form  as  a  young  palm- 
tree  when  it  bends,  and  withal  she  had  a  noble 
dignity  even  on  the  occasion  when  I  first  saw 
her. 

"  It  was  in  the  hideous  spot,  the  revolting  prison- 
hall  of  Rhyakotis.  She  wore  only  a  threadbare 
robe  that  had  once  been  costly,  and  a  foul  old  woman 
followed  her  about — as  a  greedy  rat  might  pursue  an 
imprisoned  dove — and  loaded  her  with  abusive  lan- 
guage. She  answered  not  a  word,  but  large  heavy 
tears  flowed  slowly  over  her  pale  cheeks  and  down 
onto  her  hands,  which  she  kept  crossed  on  her  bosom. 
Grief  and  anguish  spoke  from  her  eyes,  but  no  ve- 
hement passion  deformed  the  regularity  of  her  feat- 
ures. She  knew  how  to  endure  even  ignominy  with 
grace,  and  what  words  the  raging  old  woman  poured 
out  upon  her  ! 

"  I  had  long  since  been  baptized,  and  all  the  pris- 
ons were  open  to  me,  the  rich  Menander,  the  brother- 
in-law  of  the  prefect — those  prisons  in  which  under 
Maximin  so  many  Christians  were  destined  to  be 
turned  from  the  true  faith. 

"But  she  did  not  belong  to  us.  Her  eye  met 
mine  and  I  signed  my  forehead  with  the  cross,  but 
she  did  not  respond  to  the  sacred  sign.  The  guards 
led  away  the  old  woman,  and  she  drew  back  into  a 
dark  corner,  sat  down,  and  covered  her  face  with 
her  hands.  A  wondrous  sympathy  for  the  hapless 
3 


114  HOMO   SUM. 

woman  had  taken  possession  of  my  soul ;  I  felt  as  if 
she  belonged  to  me,  and  I  to  her,  and  I  believed  in 
her,  even  when  the  turnkey  had  told  me  in  coarse 
language  that  she  had  lived  with  a  Roman  at  the 
old  woman's,  and  had  defrauded  her  of  a  large  sum 
of  money.  The  next  day  I  went  again  to  the  prison, 
for  her  sake  and  my  own;  there  I  found  her 
again  in  the  same  corner  that  she  had  shrunk  into 
the  day  before;  by  her  stood  her  prison  fare  un- 
touched, a  jar  of  water  and  a  piece  of  bread. 

"  As  I  went  up  to  her,  I  saw  how  she  broke  a 
small  bit  off  the  thin  cake  for  herself,  and  then 
called  a  little  Christian  boy  who  had  come  into  the 
prison  with  his  mother,  and  gave  him  the  remainder. 
The  child  thanked  her  prettily,  and  she  drew  him 
to  her,  and  kissed  him  with  passionate  tenderness 
though  he  was  sickly  and  ugly. 

"  *  No  one  who  can  love  children  so  well  is  wholly 
lost,'  said  I  to  myself,  and  I  offered  to  help  her  as 
far  as  lay  in  my  power. 

"  She  looked  at  me  not'  without  distrust,  and  said 
that  nothing  had  happened  to  her,  but  what  she  de- 
served, and  she  would  bear  it.  Before  I  could  in- 
quire of  her  any  farther,  we  were  interrupted  by  the 
Christian  prisoners,  who  crowded  round  the  worthy 
Ammonius,  who  was  exhorting  and  comforting  them 
with  edifying  discourse.  She  listened  attentively  to 
the  old  man,  and  on  the  following  day  I  found  her 
in  conversation  with  the  mother  of  the  boy  to  whom 
she  had  given  her  bread. 

"  One  morning,  I  had  gone  there  with  some  fruit 


HOMO   SUM.  115 

to  offer  as  a  treat  to  the  prisoners,  and  particularly 
to  her.  She  took  an  apple,  and  said,  rising  as  she 
spoke,  *  I  would  now  ask  another  favor  of  you.  You 
are  a  Christian,  send  me  a  priest,  that  he  may  bap- 
tize me,  if  he  does  not  think  me  unworthy,  for  I  am 
burdened  with  sins  so  heavily  as  no  other  woman  can 
be."  Her  large,  sweet  childlike  eyes  filled  again 
with  big  silent  tears,  and  I  spoke  to  her  from  my 
heart  and  showed  her  as  well  as  I  could  the  grace 
of  the  Redeemer.  Shortly  after,  Ammonius  secretly 
baptized  her,  and  she  begged  to  be  given  the  name 
of  Magdalen,  and  so  it  was,  and  after  that  she  took 
me  wholly  into  her  confidence. 

"  She  had  left  her  husband  and  her  child  for  the 
sake  of  a  diabolical  seducer,  whom  she  had  followed 
to  Alexandria,  and  who  had  there  abandoned  her. 
Alone  and  friendless,  in  want  and  guilt,  she  remained 
behind  with  a  hard-hearted  and  covetous  hostess,  who 
had  brought  her  before  the  judge,  and  so  into  prison. 
"What  an  abyss  of  the  deepest  anguish  of  soul  I  could 
discover  in  this  woman,  who  was  worthy  of  a  better 
lot !  What  is  highest  and  best  in  a  woman  ?  Her 
love,  her  mother's  heart,  her  honor  ;  and  Magdalen 
had  squandered  and  ruined  all  these  by  her  own  guilt. 
The  blow  of  overwhelming  fate  may  be  easily 
borne,  but  woe  to  him,  whose  life  is  ruined  by  his 
own  sin  !  She  was  a  sinner,  she  felt  it  with  anguish 
of  repentance,  and  she  steadily  refused  my  offers  to 
purchase  her  freedom. 

"  She  was  greedy  of  punishment,  as  a  man  in  a 
fever  is  greedy  of  the  bitter  potion,  which  cools  his 


Il6  HOMO   SUM. 

blood.  And,  by  the  crucified  Lord !  I  have  found 
more  noble  humanity  among  sinners,  than  in  many 
just  men  in  priestly  garb.  Through  the  presence  of 
Magdalen,  the  prison  recovered  its  sanctity  in  my 
eyes.  Before  this  I  had  frequently  quitted  it  full  of 
deep  contempt,  for  among  the  imprisoned  Christians, 
there  were  too  often  lazy  vagabonds,  who  had  loudly 
confessed  the  Saviour  only  to  be  fed  by  the  gifts  of 
the  brethren ;  there  I  had  seen  accursed  criminals, 
who  hoped  by  a  martyr's  death  to  win  back  the  re- 
demption that  they  had  forfeited ;  there  I  had  heard 
the  woeful  cries  of  the  faint-hearted,  who  feared 
death  as  much  as  they  feared  treason  to  the  Most 
High.  There  were  things  to  be  seen  there  that 
might  harrow  the  soul,  but  also  examples  of  the  sub- 
limest  greatness.  Men  have  I  seen  there,  aye,  and 
women,  who  went  to  their  death  in  calm  and  silent 
bliss,  and  whose  end  was,  indeed,  noble — more  noble 
than  that  of  the  much-lauded  Kodrus  or  Decius 
Mus. 

"  Among  all  the  prisoners  there  was  neither  man 
nor  woman  who  was  more  calmly  self-possessed, 
more  devoutly  resigned,  than  Magdalen.  The  words, 
'  There  is  more  joy  in  Heaven  over  one  sinner  that 
repenteth  than  over  ninety  and  nine  that  need  no 
repentance,"  strengthened  her  greatly,  and  she  re- 
pented— yea  and  verily,  she  did.  And  for  my  part, 
God  is  my  witness  that  not  an  impulse  as  from  man 
to  woman  drew  me  to  her,  and  yet  I  could  not  leave 
her,  and  I  passed  the  day  by  her  side,  and  at  night 
she  haunted  my  soul,  and  it  would  have  seemed  to 


HOMO   SUM.  117 

me  fairer  than  all  in  life  besides  to  have  been 
allowed  to  die  with  her. 

"  It  was  at  the  time  of  the  fourth  decree  of  perse- 
cution, a  few  months  before  the  promulgation  of  the 
first  edict  of  toleration. 

"  He  that  sacrifices,  it  is  said,  shall  go  unpunished, 
and  he  that  refuses,  shall  by  some  means  or  other  be 
brought  to  it,  but  those  who  continue  stiff-necked 
shall  suffer  death.  For  a  long  time  much  considera- 
tion had  been  shown  to  the  prisoners,  but  now  they 
were  alarmed  by  having  the  edict  read  to  them  anew. 
Many  hid  themselves  groaning  and  lamenting,  others 
prayed  aloud,  and  most  awaited  what  might  happen 
with  pale  lips  and  painful  breathing. 

"  Magdalen  remained  perfectly  calm.  The  names 
of  the  Christian  prisoners  were  called  out,  and  the 
Imperial  soldiers  led  them  altogether  to  one  spot. 
Neither  my  name  nor  hers  was  called,  for  I  did  not 
belong  to  the  prisoners,  and  she  had  not  been  appre- 
hended for  the  faith's  sake.  The  officer  was  rolling 
up  his  list,  when  Magdalen  rose  and  stepped  mod- 
estly forward,  saying  with  quiet  dignity,  *  I  too  am 
a  Christian.' 

"  If  there  be  an  angel  who  wears  the  form  and 
features  of  man,  his  face  must  resemble  hers,  as  she 
looked  in  that  hour.  The  Koman,  a  worthy  man, 
looked  at  her  with  a  benevolent,  but  searching  gaze. 
*I  do  not  find  your  name  here,'  he  said  aloud,  shak- 
ing his  head  and  pointing  to  the  roll ;  and  he  added 
in  a  lower  voice,  '  Nor  do  I  intend  to  find  it.' 

"  She  went  closer  up  to  him,  and  said  out  loud, 


Il8  HOMO  SUM. 

'  Grant  me  my  place  among  the  believers,  and  write 
down,  that  Magdalen,  the  Christian,  refuses  to  sacri- 
fice.' 

"  My  soul  was  deeply  moved,  and  with  joyful 
eagerness  I  cried  out,  'Put  down  my  name  too,  and 
write,  that  Menander,  the  son  of  Herophilus,  also 
refuses.'  The  Roman  did  his  duty. 

"  Time  has  not  blotted  out  from  my  memory  a 
single  moment  of  that  day.  There  stood  the  altar, 
and  near  it  the  heathen  priest  on  one  side,  and  on 
the  other  the  Emperor's  officer.  "We  were  taken  up 
two  by  two ;  Magdalen  and  I  were  the  last.  One 
word  now — one  little  word — would  give  us  life  and 
freedom,  another  the  rack  and  death.  Out  of  thirty 
of  us  only  four  had  found  courage  to  refuse  to  sac- 
rifice, but  the  feeble-hearted  broke  out  into  lamenta- 
tions, and  beat  their  foreheads,  and  prayed  that  the 
Lord  might  strengthen  the  courage  of  the  others. 
An  unutterably  pure  and  lofty  joy  filled  my  soul, 
and  I  felt,  as  if  we  were  out  of  the  body  floating  on 
ambient  clouds.  Softly  and  calmly  we  refused  to 
sacrifice,  thanked  the  Imperial  official,  who  warned 
us  kindly,  and  in  the  same  hour  and  place  we  fell 
into  the  hands  of  the  torturers.  She  gazed  only  up 
to  heaven,  and  I  only  at  her,  but  in  the  midst  of  the 
most  frightful  torments  I  saw  before  me  the  Saviour 
beckoning  to  me,  surrounded  by  Angels  that  soared 
on  soft  airs,  whose  presence  filled  my  eyes  with  the 
purest  light,  and  my  ears  with  heavenly  music.  She 
bore  the  utmost  torture  without  flinching,  only  once 
she  called  out  the  name  of  her  son  Hernias :  then  I 


HOMO   SUM. 

turned  to  look  at  her,  and  saw  her  gazing  up  to 
Heaven  with  wide  open  eyes  and  trembling  lips — 
living,  but  already  with  the  Lord — on  the  rack,  and 
yet  in  bliss.  My  stronger  body  clung  to  the  earth ; 
she  found  deliverance  at  the  first  blow  of  the  torturer. 

"  I  myself  closed  her  eyes,  the  sweetest  eyes  in 
which  Heaven  was  ever  mirrored,  I  drew  a  ring 
from  her  dear,  white,  blood-stained  hand,  and  here 
under  the  rough  sheep-skin  I  have  it  yet ;  and  I 
pray,  I  pray,  I  pray — oh  !  my  heart !  My  God  if  it 
might  be — if  this  is  the  end —  ! " 

Paulus  put  his  hand  to  his  head  and  sank  ex- 
hausted on  the  bed  in  a  deep  swoon.  The  sick  man 
had  followed  his  story  with  breathless  interest. 
Some  time  since  he  had  risen  from  his  bed,  and,  un- 
observed by  his  companion,  had  sunk  on  his  knees ; 
he  now  dragged  himself  all  hot  and  trembling  to  the 
side  of  the  senseless  man,  tore  the  sheep's-fell  from 
his  breast,  and  with  hasty  movement  sought  the 
ring ;  he  found  it,  and  fixing  on  it  passionate  eyes 
as  though  he  would  melt  it  with  their  fire,  he  pressed 
it  again  and  again  to  his  lips,  to  his  heart,  to  his  lips 
again ;  buried  his  face  in  his  hands  and  wept  bitterly. 

It  was  not  till  Hernias  returned  from  the  oasis 
that  Stephanus  thought  of  his  exhausted  and  faint- 
ing friend,  and  with  his  son's  assistance  restoredr  him 
to  consciousness.  Paulus  did  not  refuse  to  take  some 
food  and  drink,  and  in  the  cool  of  the  evening,  when 
he  was  refreshed  and  invigorated,  he  sat  again  by 
the  side  of  Stephanus,  and  understood  from  the  old 
man  that  Magdalen  was  certainly  his  wife. 


120  HOMO  SUM. 

"  Now  I  know,"  said  Paulus,  pointing  to  Hermas, 
"  how  it  is  that  from  the  first  I  felt  such  a  love  for 
the  lad  there." 

The  old  man  softly  pressed  his  hand,  for  he  felt 
himself  tied  to  his  friend  by  a  new  and  tender  bond, 
and  it  was  with  silent  ecstasy  that  he  received  the 
assurance  that  the  wife  he  had  always  loved,  the 
mother  of  his  child,  had  died  a  Christian  and  a 
martyr,  and  had  found  before  him  the  road  to 
Heaven. 

The  old  man  slept  as  peacefully  as  a  child  the 
following  night,  and  when,  next  morning,  messen- 
gers came  from  Raithu  to  propose  to  Paulus  that 
he  should  leave  the  Holy  Mountain,  and  go  with 
them  to  become  their  elder  and  ruler,  Stephanus 
said, 

"  Follow  this  high  call  with  all  confidence,  for 
you  deserve  it.  I  really  no  longer  have  need  of 
you,  for  I  shall  get  well  now  without  any  farther 
nursing." 

But  Paulus,  far  more  disturbed  than  rejoiced, 
begged  of  the  messengers  a  delay  of  seven  days  for 
reflection,  and  after  wandering  restlessly  from  one 
holy  spot  to  another,  at  last  went  down  into  the 
oasis,  there  to  pray  in  the  church. 


ttOMO  SUM.  121 


CHAPTER  VIII. 

IT  was  a  delicious  refreshing  evening ;  the  full 
moon  rose  calmly  in  the  dark  blue  vault  of  the  night- 
sky,  and  poured  a  flood  of  light  down  on  the  cool 
earth.  But  its  rays  did  not  give  a  strong  enough 
light  to  pierce  the  misty  veil  that  hung  over  the 
giant  mass  of  the  Holy  Mountain ;  the  city  of  the 
oasis  on  the  contrary  was  fully  illuminated ;  the 
broad  road-way  of  the  high-street  looked  to  the 
wanderer  who  descended  from  the  height  above  like 
a  shining  path  of  white  marble,  and  the  freshly 
plastered  walls  of  the  new  church  gleamed  as  white 
as  in  the  light  of  day.  The  shadows  of  the  houses 
and  palm-trees  lay  like  dark  strips  of  carpet  across 
the  road,  which  was  nearly  empty  in  spite  of  the 
evening  coolness,  which  usually  tempted  the  citizens 
out  into  the  air. 

The  voices  of  men  and  women  sounded  out  through 
the  open  windows  of  the  church;  then  the  door 
opened  and  the  Pharanite  Christians,  who  had  been 
partaking  of  the  Supper — the  bread  and  the  cup 
passed  from  hand  to  hand — came  out  into  the  moon- 
light. The  elders  and  deacons,  the  readers  and 
singers,  the  acolytes  and  the  assembled  priesthood 
of  the  place  followed  the  Bishop  Agapitus,  and  the 


122  HOMO  SUM. 

laymen  came  behind  Obedianus,  the  head-man  of 
the  oasis,  and  the  Senator  Petrus ;  with  Petrus 
came  his  wife,  his  grown-up  children  and  numerous 
slaves. 

The  church  was  empty  when  the  door-keeper,  who 
was  extinguishing  the  lights,  observed  a  man  in  a 
dark  corner  of  an  antechamber  through  which  a 
spring  of  water  softly  plashed  and  trickled,  and  which 
was  intended  for  penitents.  The  man  was  prostrate 
on  the  ground  and  absorbed  in  prayer,  and  he  did 
not  raise  himself  till  the  porter  called  him,  and  threw 
the  light  of  his  little  lamp  full  in  his  face. 

He  began  to  address  him  with  hard  words,  but 
when  he  recognized  in  the  belated  worshipper  the 
anchorite  Paulus  of  Alexandria  he  changed  his  key, 
and  said,  in  a  soft  and  almost  submissive  tone  of 
entreaty, 

"You  have  surely  prayed  enough,  pious  man. 
The  congregation  have  left  the  church,  and  I  must 
close  it  on  account  of  our  beautiful  new  vessels  and 
the  heathen  robbers.  I  know  that  the  brethren  of 
Eaithu  have  chosen  you  to  be  their  elder,  and  that 
this  high  honor  was  announced  to  you  by  their 
messengers,  for  they  came  to  see  our  church  too  and 
greatly  admired  it.  Are  you  going  at  once  to  settle 
with  them  or  shall  you  keep  the  high  feast  with 
us?" 

"  That  you  shall  hear  to-morrow,"  answered 
Paulus,  who  had  risen  from  his  knees,  and  was  lean- 
ing against  a  pillar  of  the  narrow,  bare,  penitential 
chamber.  "  In  this  house  dwells  One  of  whom  I 


HOMO  SUM.  123 

would  fain  take  counsel,  and  I  beg  of  you  to  leave 
me  here  alone.  If  you  will,  you  can  lock  the  door 
and  fetch  me  out  later  before  you  go  to  rest  for  the 
night." 

"  That  cannot  be,"  said  the  man  considering,  "  for 
my  wife  is  ill,  and  my  house  is  a  long  way  from  here 
at  the  end  of  the  town  by  the  little  gate,  and  I  must 
take  the  key  this  very  evening  to  the  Senator  Petrus, 
because  his  son,  the  architect  Antonius,  wants  to 
begin  the  building  of  the  new  altar  the  first  thing 
to-morrow  morning.  The  workmen  are  to  be  here 
by  sunrise,  and  if— 

"  Show  me  the  key,"  interrupted  Paulus.  "To 
what  untold  blessing  may  this  little  instrument  close 
or  open  the  issues !  Do  you  know,  man,  that  I 
think  there  is  a  way  for  us  both  out  of  the  difficulty  ? 
You  go  to  your  sick  wife,  and  I  will  take  the  key  to 
the  Senator  so  soon  as  I  have  finished  my  devo- 
tions." 

The  door-keeper  considered  for  a  few  minutes, 
and  then  acceded  to  the  request  of  the  future  pres- 
byter of  Rai'thu,  while  at  the  same  time  he  begged 
him  not  to  linger  too  late. 

As  he  went  by  the  Senator's  house  he  smelt  the 
savor  of  roast  meat ;  he  was  a  poor  man  and 
thought  to  himself,  "  They  fast  in  there  just  when  it 
pleases  them,  but  as  for  us,  we  fast  when  it  pleases 
us  least." 

The  good  smell,  which  provoked  this  lament,  rose 
from  a  roast  sheep,  which  was  being  prepared  as  a 


124  HOMO   SUM. 

feast-supper  for  the  Senator  and  the  assembled  mem- 
bers of  his  household;  even  the  slaves  shared  in 
the  late  evening  meal. 

Petrus  and  Dame  Dorothea  sat  in  the  Greek 
fashion,  side  by  side  in  a  half  reclining  position  on 
a  simple  couch,  and  before  them  stood  a  table  which 
no  one  shared  with  them,  but  close  to  which  was  the 
seat  for  the  grown-up  children  of  the  house.  The 
slaves  squatted  on  the  ground  nearer  to  the  door,  and 
crowded  into  two  circles,  each  surrounding  a  steam- 
ing dish,  out  of  which  they  helped  themselves  to  the 
brown  stew  of  lentils  with  the  palm  of  the  hand.  A 
round,  gray-looking  cake  of  bread  lay  near  each,  and 
was  not  to  be  broken  till  the  steward  Jethro  had 
cut  and  apportioned  the  sheep.  The  juicy  pieces  of 
the  back  and  thighs  of  the  animal  were  offered  to 
Petrus  and  his  family  to  choose  from,  but  the  carver 
laid  a  slice  for  each  slave  on  his  cake — a  larger  for 
the  men  and  a  smaller  for  the  women.  Many  looked 
with  envy  on  the  more  succulent  piece  that  had 
fallen  to  a  neighbor's  share,  but  not  even  those  that 
had  fared  worst  dared  to  complain,  for  a  slave  was 
allowed  to  speak  only  when  his  master  addressed 
him,  and  Petrus  forbid  even  his  children  to  dis- 
cuss their  food  whether  to  praise  it  or  to  find 
fault. 

In  the  midst  of  the  underlings  sat  Miriam ;  she 
never  ate  much,  and  all  meat  was  repulsive  to  her, 
so  she  pushed  the  cut  from  the  ribs  that  was  given 
to  her  over  to  an  old  garden-woman,  who  sat  op- 
posite, and  who  had  often  given  her  a  fruit  or  a  littlt 


HOMO   SUM.  125 

honey,  for  Miriam  loved  sweet  things.  Petrus 
spoke  not  a  word  to-day  to  his  slaves,  and  very  little 
even  to  his  family  ;  Dorothea  marked  the  deep  lines 
between  his  grave  eyes,  not  without  anxiety,  and 
noted  how  he  pinched  his  lips,  when,  forgetful  of 
the  food  before  him,  he  sat  lost  in  meditation. 

The  meal  was  ended,  but  still  he  did  not  move, 
nor  did  he  observe  the  inquiring  glances  which  were 
turned  on  him  by  many  eyes ;  no  one  dared  to  rise 
before  the  master  gave  the  signal. 

Miriam  followed  all  his  movements  with  more  im- 
patience than  any  of  the  others  who  were  present ; 
she  rocked  restlessly  backwards  and  forwards, 
crumbled  the  bread  that  she  had  left  with  her  slender 
fingers,  and  her  breath  now  came  fast  and  faster,  and 
now  seemed  to  stop  entirely.  She  had  heard  the 
court-yard  gate  open,  and  had  recognized  Hernias' 
step. 

"  He  wants  to  speak  to  the  master,  in  a  moment 
he  will  come  in,  and  find  me  among  these — "  thought 
she,  and  she  involuntarily  stroked  her  hand  over  her 
rough  hair  to  smooth  it,  and  threw  a  glance  at  the 
other  slaves,  in  which  hatred  and  contempt  were 
equally  marked. 

But  Hernias  came  not.  Not  for  an  instant  did 
she  think  that  her  ear  had  deceived  her — was  he 
waiting  now  at  the  door  for  the  conclusion  of  the 
meal?  Was  his  late  visit  intended  for  the  Gaulish 
lady,  to  whom  she  had  seen  him  go  yesterday  again 
with  the  wine-jar  ? 

Sirona's  husband,  Phoebicius,  as  Miriam  well  knew, 


126  HOMO   SUM. 

was  upon  the  mountain,  and  offering  sacrifice  by 
moonlight  to  Mithras  with  his  fellow  heathen  in  a 
cave  which  she  had  long  known.  She  had  seen  the 
Gaul  quit  the  court  during  the  time  of  evening- 
prayer  with  a  few  soldiers,  two  of  whom  carried 
after  him  a  huge  coffer,  out  of  which  rose  the  handle 
of  a  mighty  cauldron,  and  a  skin  full  of  water,  and 
various  vessels.  She  knew  that  these  men  would 
pass  the  whole  night  in  the  grotto  of  Mithras,  and 
there  greet  "  the  young  god  " — the  rising  sun — with 
strange  ceremonies  ;  for  the  inquisitive  shepherdess 
had  more  than  once  listened,  when  she  had  led  her 
goats  up  the  mountain  before  the  break  of  day,  and 
her  ear  had  detected  that  the  worshippers  of  Mithras 
were  performing  their  nocturnal  solemnities.  Now 
it  flashed  across  her  mind,  that  Sirona  was  alone, 
and  that  the  late  visit  of  Hermas  probably  concerned 
her,  and  not  the  Senator. 

She  started,  there  was  quite  a  pain  in  her  heart, 
and,  as  usual,  when  any  violent  emotion  agitated 
her  mind,  she  involuntarily  sprang  to  her  feet 
prompted  by  the  force  of  her  passion,  and  had  almost 
reached  the  door,  when  the  Senator's  voice  brought 
her  to  a  pause,  and  recalled  her  to  the  consciousness 
of  the  impropriety  of  her  behavior. 

The  sick  man  still  lay  with  his  inflamed  wound  and 
fever,  down  in  the  court,  and  she  knew  that  she  should 
escape  blame  if  in  answer  to  her  master's  stern  ques- 
tioning she  said  that  the  patient  needed  her,  but  she 
had  never  told  a  lie,  and  her  pride  forbade  her  even 
now  to  speak  an  untruth.  The  other  slaves  stared 


HOMO  SUM.  127 

with  astonishment,  as  she  replied,  "  I  wanted  to  get 
out ;  the  supper  is  so  long." 

Petrus  glanced  at  the  window,  and  perceiving 
how  high  the  moon  stood,  he  shook  his  head  as  if  in 
wonder  at  his  own  conduct,  then  without  blaming 
her  he  offered  a  thanksgiving,  gave  the  slaves  the 
signal  to  leave  the  room,  and  after  receiving  a  kiss 
of  "  good-night "  from  each  of  his  children — from 
among  whom  Polykarp,  the  sculptor,  alone  was 
missing — he  withdrew  to  his  own  room.  But  he 
did  not  remain  alone  there  for  long:  so  soon  as 
Dorothea  had  discussed  the  requirements  of  the 
house  for  the  next  day  with  Marthana  and  the 
steward,  and  had  been  through  the  sleeping-room  of 
her  younger  children,  casting  a  loving  glance  on  the 
peaceful  sleepers,  arranging  here  a  coverlet,  and 
there  a  pillow — she  entered  her  husband's  room  and 
called  his  name. 

Petrus  stood  still  and  looked  round,  and  his  grave 
eyes  were  full  of  grateful  tenderness  as  they  met 
those  of  his  wife.  Dorothea  knew  the  soft  and 
loving  heart  within  the  stern  exterior,  and  nodded  to 
him  with  sympathetic  understanding ;  but  before  she 
could  speak,  he  said,  "  Come  in,  come  nearer  to  me ; 
there  is  a  heavy  matter  in  hand,  and  you  cannot 
escape  your  share  of  the  burden." 

"  Give  me  my  share  ! "  cried  she  eagerly.  "  The 
slim  girl  of  former  years  has  grown  a  broad-shoul- 
ered  old  woman,  so  that  it  may  be  easier  to  her  to 
help  her  lord  to  bear  the  many  burdens  of  life.  But 
I  am  seriously  anxious — even  before  we  went  to 


128  HOMO   SUM. 

church  something  unsatisfactory  had  happened  to 
you,  and  not  merely  in  the  council-meeting.  There 
must  be  something  not  right  with  one  of  the  children." 

"  What  eyes  you  have !  "  exclaimed  Petrus. 

"  Dim,  gray  eyes,"  said  Dorothea,  "  and  not  even 
particularly  keen.  But  when  anything  concerns 
you  and  the  children  I  could  see  it  in  the  dark. 
You  are  dissatisfied  with  Polykarp ;  yesterday, 
before  he  set  out  for  Eai'thu,  you  looked  at  him  so 
— so — what  shall  I  say  ?  I  can  quite  imagine  what 
it  is  all  about,  but  I  believe  you  are  giving  yourself 
groundless  anxiety.  He  is  young,  and  so  lovely  a 
woman  as  Sirona — " 

Up  to  this  point  Petrus  had  listened  to  his  wife 
in  silence.  Now  he  clasped  his  hands,  and  inter- 
rupted her,  "  Things  certainly  are  not  going  on  quite 
right — but  I  ought  to  be  used  to  it.  What  I  meant 
to  have  confided  to  you  in  a  quiet  hour,  you  tell  me 
as  if  you  knew  all  about  it ! " 

"  And  why  not  ? "  asked  Dorothea.  "  When  you 
graft  a  scion  on  to  a  tree,  and  they  have  grown  well 
together,  the  grafted  branch  feels  the  bite  of  the 
saw  that  divides  the  stock,  or  the  blessing  of  the 
spring  that  feeds  the  roots,  just  as  if  the  pain  or  the 
boon  were  its  own.  And  you  are  the  tree  and  I  am 
the  graft,  and  the  magic  power  of  marriage  has 
made  us  one.  Your  pulses  are  my  pulses,  your 
thoughts  have  become  mine,  and  so  I  always  know 
before  you  tell  me  what  it  is  that  stirs  your  soul." 
-  Dorothea's  kind  eyes  moistened  as  she  spoke,  and 
Petrus  warmly  clasped  her  hands  in  his  as  he  said, 


HOMO   SUM.  129 

"  And  if  the  gnarled  old  trunk  bears  from  time  to 
time  some  sweet  fruit,  he  may  thank  the  graft  for 
it.  I  cannot  believe  that  the  anchorites  up  yonder 
are  peculiarly  pleasing  to  the  Lord  because  they  live 
in  solitude.  Man  comes  to  his  perfect  humanity 
only  through  his  wife  and  child,  and  he  who  has 
them  not,  can  never  learn  the  most  glorious  heights 
and  the  darkest  depths  of  life  and  feeling.  If  a  man 
may  stake  his  whole  existence  and  powers  for  any- 
thing, surely  it  is  for  his  own  house." 

"  And  you  have  honestly  done  so  for  ours  !  "  cried 
Dorothea. 

"For  ours,"  repeated  Petrus,  giving  the  words 
the  strongest  accent  of  his  deep  voice.  Two  are 
stronger  than  one,  and  it  is  long  since  we  ceased  to 
say  '  I '  in  discussing  any  question  concerning  the 
house  or  the  children  ;  and  both  have  been  touched 
by  to-day's  events." 

"  The  senate  will  not  support  you  in  constructing 
the  road  ? " 

"  No,  the  bishop  gave  the  casting-vote.  I  need 
not  tell  you  how  we  stand  towards  each  other,  and 
I  will  not  blame  him  ;  for  he  is  a  just  man,  but  in 
many  things  we  can  never  meet  half-way.  You 
know  that  he  was  in  his  youth  a  soldier,  and  his 
very  piety  is  rough.  I  might  almost  say  warlike. 
If  we  had  yielded  to  his  views,  and  if  our  head-man 
Obedianus  had  not  supported  me,  we  should  not 
have  had  a  single  picture  in  the  church,  and  it  would 
have  looked  like  a  barn  rather  than  a  house  of 
prayer.  We  never  have  understood  each  other,  and 
9 


130  HOMO   SUM. 

since  I  opposed  his  wish  of  making  Polykarp  a 
priest,  and  sent  the  boy  to  learn  of  the  sculptor 
Thalassius — for  even  as  a  child  he  drew  better  than 
many  masters  in  these  wretched  days  that  produce 
no  great  artists — since  then,  I  say,  he  speaks  of  me 
as  if  I  were  a  heathen — " 

"  And  yet  he  esteems  you  highly,  that  I  know," 
interrupted  Dame  Dorothea. 

"  I  fully  return  his  good  opinion,"  replied  Petrus, 
"  and  it  is  no  ordinary  matter  that  estranges  us. 
He  thinks  that  he  only  holds  the  true  faith,  and 
ought  to  fight  for  it ;  he  calls  all  artistic  work  a 
heathen  abomination ;  he  never  felt  the  purifying 
influence  of  the  beautiful,  and  regards  all  pictures 
and  statues  as  tending  to  idolatry.  Still  he  allows 
himself  to  admire  Polykarp's  figures  of  angels  and 
the  Good  Shepherd,  but  the  lions  put  the  old  warrior 
in  a  rage.  '  Accursed  idols  and  works  of  the  devil,' 
are  what  he  calls  them." 

"  But  there  were  lions  even  in  the  temple  of  Solo- 
mon," cried  Dorothea. 

"  I  urged  that,  and  also  that  in  the  schools  of 
the  catechists,  and  in  the  educational  history  of 
animals  which  we  possess  and  teach  from,  the  Sav- 
iour himself  is  compared  to  a  lion,  and  that  Mark, 
the  evangelist,  who  brought  the  doctrine  of  the 
gospel  to  Alexandria,  is  represented  with  a  lion. 
But  he  withstood  me  more  and  more  violently,  say- 
ing that  Polykarp's  works  were  to  adorn  no  sacred 
place,  but  the  Caesareum,  and  that  to  him  is  nothing 
but  a  heathen  edifice,  and  the  noble  works  of  the 


HOMO   SUM.  131 

Greeks  that  are  preserved  there  he  calls  revolting 
images  by  which  Satan  ensnares  the  souls  of  Chris- 
tian men.  The  other  senators  can  understand  his 
hard  words,  but  they  cannot  follow  mine ;  and  so 
they  vote  with  him,  and  my  motion  to  construct  the 
road-way  \va,s  thrown  over,  because  it  did  not  become 
a  Christian  assembly  to  promote  idolatry,  and  to 
smooth  a  way  for  the  devil." 

"I  can  see  that  you  must  have  answered  them 
sharply ! " 

"  Indeed  I  believe  so,"  answered  Petrus,  looking 
down.  "  Many  painful  things  were  no  doubt  said, 
and  it  was  I  that  suffered  for  them.  Agapitus,  who 
was  looking  at  the  deacons'  reports,  was  especially 
dissatisfied  with  the  account  that  I  laid  before  them  ; 
they  blamed  us  severely  because  you  gave  away  as 
much  bread  to  heathen  households  as  to  Christians. 
It  is  no  doubt  true,  but— 

"  But,"  cried  Dorothea  eagerty,  "  hunger  is  just  as 
painful  to  the  unbaptized,  and  their  Christian  neigh- 
bors do  not  help  them,  and  yet  they  too  are  our  flesh 
and  blood.  I  should  ill  fulfil  my  office  if  I  were  to 
let  them  starve,  because  the  highest  comfort  is  lack- 
ing to  them." 

"  And  yet,"  said  Petrus,  "  the  council  decided  that, 
for  the  future,  you  must  apply  at  the  most  a  fourth 
part  of  the  grain  allotted  to  their  use.  You  need 
not  fear  for  them  ;  for  the  future  some  of  our  own 
produce  may  go  to  them  out  of  what  we  have 
hitherto  sold.  You  need  not  withdraw  even  a  loaf 
from  any  one  of  your  proteges,  but  certainly  may 


132  HOMO   SUM. 

now  be  laid  by  the  plans  for  the  road.  Indeed  there 
is  no  hurry  for  its  completion,  for  Polykarp  will  now 
hardly  be  able  to  go  on  with  his  lions  here  among  us. 
Poor  fellow !  with  what  delight  he  formed  the  clay 
models,  and  how  wonderfully  he  succeeded  in  repro- 
ducing the  air  and  aspect  of  the  majestic  beasts.  It 
is  as  if  he  were  inspired  by  the  spirit  of  the  old 
Athenian  masters.  We  must  now  consider  whether 
in  Alexandria — 

"  Rather  let  us  endeavor,"  interrupted  Dorothea, 
"  to  induce  him  at  once  to  put  aside  his  models,  and 
to  execute  other  more  pious  works.  Agapitus  has 
keen  eyes  and  the  heathen  work  is  only  too  dear  to 
the  lad's  heart." 

The  Senator's  brow  grew  dark  at  the  last  words, 
and  he  said,  not  without  some  excitement,  "  Every- 
thing that  the  heathen  do  is  not  to  be  condemned. 
Polykarp  must  be  kept  busy,  constantly  and  ear- 
nestly occupied,  for  he  has  set  his  eyes  where  they 
should  not  be  set.  Sirona  is  the  wife  of  another, 
and  even  in  sport  no  man  should  try  to  win  his 
neighbor's  wife.  -  Do  you  think,  the  Gaulish  woman 
is  capable  of  forgetting  her  duty  ? " 

Dorothea  hesitated,  and  after  some  reflection 
answered,  "  She  is  a  beautiful  and  vain  child — a  per- 
fect child ;  I  mean  in  nature  and  not  in  years, 
although  she  certainly  might  be  the  grandchild  of 
her  strange  husband,  for  whom  she  feels  neither  love 
nor  respect,  nor,  indeed,  anything  but  utter  aversion. 
I  know  not  what,  but  something  frightful  must  have 
come  between  them  even  in  Rome,  and  I  have  given 


HOMO  SUM.  133 

up  all  attempts  to  guide  her  heart  back  to  him.  In 
everything  else  she  is  soft  and  yielding,  and  often, 
when  she  is  playing  with  the  children,  I  cannot 
imagine  where  she  finds  her  reckless  gayety.  I  wish 
she  were  a  Christian,  for  she  is  very  dear  to  me, 
why  should  I  deny  it  ?  It  is  impossible  to  be  sad 
when  she  is  by,  and  she  is  devoted  to  me,  and  dreads 
my  blame,  and  is  always  striving  to  win  my  appro- 
bation. Certainly  she  tries  to  please  every  one,  even 
the  children;  but,  so  far  as  I  can  see,  not  more 
Pqlykarp  than  any  one  else,  although  he  is  such  a 
fine  young  man.  No,  certainly  not." 

"  And  yet  the  boy  gazes  at  her,"  said  Petrus, 
"  and  Phoebicius  has  noticed  it ;  he  met  me  yester- 
day when  I  came  home,  and,  in  his  sour,  polite 
manner,  requested  me  to  advise  my  son,  when  he 
wished  to  offer  a  rose,  not  to  throw  it  into  his  win- 
dow, as  he  was  not  fond  of  flowers,  and  preferred  to 
gather  them  himself  for  his  wife." 

The  Senator's  wife  turned  pale,  and  then  exclaimed 
shortly  and  positively,  "  We  do  not  need  a  lodger, 
and  much  as  I  should  miss  his  wife,  the  best  plan 
will  be  for  you  to  request  him  to  find  another  dwell- 
ing." 

"  Say  no  more,  wife,"  Petrus  said  sternly,  and  in- 
terrupting her  with  a  wave  of  his  hand.  "  Shall  we 
make  Sirona  pay  for  it  because  our  son  has  commit- 
ted a  folly  for  her  sake  ?  You  yourself  said,  that  her 
intercourse  with  the  children,  and  her  respect  for  you 
preserve  her  from  evil,  and  now  shall  we  show  her 
the  door  ?  By  no  means.  The  Gauls  may  remain 


134  HOMO  SUM. 

in  my  house  so  long  as  nothing  occurs  that  compels 
me  to  send  them  out  of  it.  My  father  was  a  Greek, 
but  through  my  mother  I  have  Amalekite  blood  in 
my  veins,  and  I  should  dishonor  myself,  if  I  drove 
from  my  threshold  any  with  whom  I  had  once  bro- 
ken bread  under  my  roof.  Polykarp  shall  be  warned 
and  shall  learn  what  he  owes  to  us,  to  himself,  and 
to  the  laws  of  God.  I  know  how  to  value  his  noble 
gifts,  and  I  am  his  friend,  but  I  am  also  his  master 
and  I  will  find  means  of  preventing  my  son  from  in- 
troducing the  light  conduct  of  the  capital  beneath 
his  father's  roof." 

The  last  words  were  spoken  with  weight  and  de- 
cision, like  the  blows  of  a  hammer,  and  stern  resolve 
sparkled  in  the  Senator's  eyes.  Nevertheless,  his 
wife  went  fearlessly  up  to  him,  and  said,  laying  her 
hand  on  his  arm,  "  It  is  indeed  well  that  a  man  can 
keep  his  eyes  set  on  what  is  just,  when  we  women 
should  follow  the  hasty  impulse  of  our  heart.  Even 
in  wrestling,  men  only  fight  with  lawful  and  recog- 
nized, means  while  fighting  women  use  their  teeth  and 
nails.  You  men  understand  better  how  to  prevent 
injustice  than  we  do,  and  that  you  have  once  more 
proved  to  me,  but,  in  carrying  justice  out,  you  are 
not  our  superiors.  The  Gauls  may  remain  in  our 
house,  and  do  you  take  Polykarp  severely  to  task, 
but  in  the  first  instance  as  his  friend.  Or  would  it 
not  be  better  if  you  left  it  to  rne  ?  He  was  so  happy 
in  thinking  of  the  completion  of  his  lions,  and  in 
having  to  work  for  the  great  building  in  the  capital 
and  now  it  is  all  over.  I  wish  you  had  already  bro- 


HOMO  SUM.  135 

ken  that  to  him ;  but  love  stories  are  women's  affairs, 
and  you  know  how  good  the  boy  is  to  me.  A  mother's 
word  sometimes  has  more  effect  than  a,  father's  blow, 
and  it  is  in  life  as  it  is  in  war ;  the  light  forces  of 
archers  go  first  into  the  field,  and  the  heavily  armed 
division  stays  in  the  background  to  support  them ; 
then,  if  the  enemy  will  not  yield,  it  comes  forward 
and  decides  the  battle.  First  let  me  speak  to  the  lad. 
It  may  be  that  he  threw  the  rose  into  Sirona's  win- 
dow only  in  sport,  for  she  plays  with  his  brothers 
and  sisters  as  if  she  herself  were  one  of  them.  I  will 
question  him ;  for  if  it  is  so,  it  would  be  neither  just 
nor  prudent  to  blame  him.  Some  caution  is  needed 
even  in  giving  a  warning  ;  for  many  a  one,  who  would 
never  have  thought  of  stealing,  has  become  a  thief 
though  false  suspicion.  A  young  heart  that  is  be- 
ginning to  love,  is  like  a  wild  boy  who  always 
would  rather  take  the  road  he  is  warned  to  avoid, 
and  when  I  was  a  girl,  I  myself  first  discovered  how 
much  I  liked  you,  when  the  Senator  Aman's  wife — 
who  wanted  you  for  her  own  daughter — advised 
me  to  be  on  my  guard  with  you.  A  man  who  has 
made  such  good  use  of  his  time  among  all  the  temp- 
tations of  the  Greek  ,  Sodom  as  Polykarp,  and  who 
has  won  such  high  praise  from  all  his  teachers  and 
masters,  cannot  have  been  much  injured  by  the  light 
manners  of  the  Alexandrians.  It  is  in  a  man's  early 
years  that  he  takes  the  bent  which  he  follows  through- 
out his  later  life,  and  that  he  had  done  before  he 
left  our  house.  Nay — even  if  I  did  not  know  what 
a  good  fellow  Polykarp  is — I  need  only  look  at  you  to 


136  HOMO  SUM. 

say,  *  A  child  that  was  brought  up  by  this  father, 
could  never  turn  out  a  bad  man.' " 

Petrus  sadly  shrugged  his  shoulders,  as  though  he 
regarded  his  wife's  flattering  words  as  mere  idle  folly, 
and  yet  he  smiled,  as  he  asked, 

"  Whose  school  of  rhetoric  did  you  go  to  ?  So  be 
it  then ;  speak  to  the  lad  when  he  returns  from  Raithu. 
How  high  the  moon  is  already ;  come  to  rest — An- 
tonius  is  to  place  the  altar  in  the  early  dawn,  and  I 
wish  to  be  present." 


HOMO  SUM.  137 


CHAPTER  IX. 

MIRIAM'S  ears  had  not  betrayed  her.  While  she 
was  detained  at  supper,  Hernias  had  opened  the  court- 
yard-gate; he  came  to  bring  the  Senator  a  noble 
young  buck,  that  he  had  killed  a  few  hours  before, 
as  a  thank-offering  for  the  medicine  to  which  his 
father  owed  his  recovery.  It  would  no  doubt  have 
been  soon  enough  the  next  morning,  but  he  could 
find  no  rest  up  on  the  mountain,  and  did  not — and 
indeed  did  not  care  to — conceal  from  himself  the 
fact  that  the  wish  to  give  expression  to  his  gratitude 
attracted  him  down  into  the  oasis  far  less  than  the 
hope  of  seeing  Sirona,  and  of  hearing  a  word  from 
her  lips. 

Since  their  first  meeting  he  had  seen  her  several 
times,  and  had  even  been  into  her  house,  when  she 
had  given  him  the  wine  for  his  father,  and  when  he 
had  taken  back  the  empty  flask.  Once,  as  she  was 
filling  the  bottle  which  he  held,  out  of  the  large  jar 
her  white  fingers  had  touched  his,  and  her  inquiry 
whether  he  were  afraid  of  her,  or  if  not,  why  his 
hands  which  looked  so  strong  should  tremble  so  vio- 
lently, dwelt  still  in  his  mind.  The  nearer  he  ap- 
proached Petrus'  house  the  more  vehemently  his 
heart  beat ;  he  stood  still  in  front  of  the  gateway 
to  take  breath  and  to  collect  himself  a  little,  for  he 


138  HOMO  SUM. 

felt  that  agitated  as  he  was,  he  would  find  it  difficult 
to  utter  any  coherent  words. 

At  last  he  laid  his  hand  on  the  latch  and  entered 
the  yard.  The  watch-dogs  already  knew  him,  and 
only  barked  once  as  he  stepped  over  the  threshold. 

He  brought  a  gift  in  his  hand,  and  he  wanted  to 
take  nothing  away,  and  yet  he  appeared  to  himself 
just  like  a  thief  as  he  looked  round,  first  at  the  main 
building  lighted  up  by  the  moon,  and  then  at  the 
Gaul's  dwelling-house,  which,  veiled  in  darkness, 
stood  up  as  a  vague  silhouette,  and  threw  a  broad 
dark  shadow  on  the  granite  flags  of  the  pavement, 
which  was  trodden  to  shining  smoothness.  There 
was  not  a  soul  to  be  seen,  and  the  reek  of  the  roast 
sheep  told  him  that  Petrus  and  his  household  were 
assembled  at  supper. 

"  I  might  come  inopportunely  on  the  feasters," 
said  he  to  himself  as  he  threw  the  buck  over  from 
his  left  to  his  right  shoulder,  and  looked  up  at 
Sirona's  window,  which  he  knew  only  too  well. 

It  was  not  lighted  up,  but  a  whiter  and  paler 
something  appeared  within  its  dark  stone  frame,  and 
this  something  attracted  his  gaze  with  an  irresistible 
spell ;  it  moved,  and  Sirona's  greyhound  set  up  a 
sharp  barking. 

It  was  she — it  must  be  she !  Her  form  rose  be- 
fore his  fancy  in  all  its  brilliant  beauty,  and  the  idea 
flashed  through  his  mind  that  she  must  be  alone,  for 
that  he  had  met  her  husband  and  the  old  slave  wo- 
man among  the  worshippers  of  Mithras  on  their  way 
to  the  mountain.  The  pious  youth,  who  so  lately 


HOMO  SUM.  139 

had  punished  his  flesh  with  the  scourge  to  banish 
seductive  dream-figures,  had  in  these  few  days  be- 
come quite  another  man.  He  would  not  leave  the 
mountain,  for  his  father's  sake,  but  he  was  quite  de- 
termined no  longer  to  avoid  the  way  of  the  world  ; 
nay,  rather  to  seek  it.  He  had  abandoned  the  care 
of  his  father  to  the  kindly  Paulus,  and  had  wandered 
about  among  the  rocks ;  there  he  had  practised 
throwing  the  discus,  he  had  hunted  the  wild  goats 
and  beasts  of  prey,  and  from  time  to  time — but  al- 
ways with  some  timidity — he  had  gone  down  into 
the  oasis  to  wander  round  the  Senator's  house,  and 
catch  a  glimpse  of  Sirona. 

Now  that  he  knew  that  she  was  alone,  he  was  ir- 
resistibly drawn  to  her-  What  he  desired  of  her,  he 
himself  could  not  have  said  ;  and  nothing  was  clear 
to  his  mind  beyond  the  wish  to  touch  her  fingers 
once  more. 

Whether  this  were  a  sin  or  not,  was  all  the  same 
to  him ;  the  most  harmless  play  was  called  a  sin, 
and  every  thought  of  the  world  for  which  he  longed, 
and  he  was  fully  resolved  to  take  the  sin  upon  him- 
self, if  only  he  might  attain  his  end.  Sin  after  all 
was  nothing  but  a  phantom  terror  with  which  they 
frighten  children,  and  the  worthy  Petrus  had  as- 
sured him  that  he  might  be  a  man  capable  of  great 
deeds.  With  a  feeling  that  he  Avas  venturing  on  an 
unheard-of  act  he  went  towards  Sirona's  window, 
and  she  at  once  recognized  him  as  he  stood  in  the 
moonlight. 

"  Hermas  !  "  he  heard  her  say  softly.    He  was 


140  HOMO  SUM. 

seized  with  such  violent  terror  that  he  stood  as  if 
spell-bound,  the  goat  slipped  from  his  shoulders,  and 
he  felt  as  if  his  heart  had  ceased  to  beat.  And 
again  the  sweet  woman's  voice  called,  "  Hermas,  is 
it  you  ?  "What  brings  you  to  us  at  such  a  late 
hour \ " 

He  stammered  an  incoherent  answer,  and  she  said, 
"  1  do  not  understand  ;  come  a  little  nearer." 

Involuntarily  he  stepped  forward  into  the  shadow 
of  the  house  and  close  up  to  her  window.  She  wore 
a  white  robe  with  wide,  open  sleeves,  and  her  arms 
shone  in  the  dim  light  as  white  as  her  garment. 
The  greyhound  barked  again  ;  she  quieted  it,  and  then 
asked  Hermas  how  his  father  was,  and  whether  he 
needed  some  more  wine.  He  replied  that  she  was 
very  kind,  angelically  kind,  but  that  the  sick  man 
was  recovering  fast,  and  that  she  had  already  given 
him  far  too  much.  Neither  of  them  said  anything 
that  might  not  have  been  heard  by  everybody,  and 
yet  they  whispered  as  if  they  were  speaking  of  some 
forbidden  thing. 

"  Wait  a  moment,"  said  Sirona,  and  she  disap- 
peared within  the  room  ;  she  soon  reappeared,  and 
said  softly  and  sadly,  "  I  would  ask  you  to  come 
into  the  house,  but  Phcebicius  has  locked  the  door. 
I  am  quite  alone ;  hold  the  flask  so  that  I  may  fill 
it  through  the  open  window." 

With  these  words  she  leaned  over  with  the  large 
jar ;  she  was  strong,  but  the  wine-jar  seemed  to  her 
heavier  than  on  other  occasions,  and  she  said  with  a 
sigh,  "  The  amphora  is  too  heavy  for  me." 


HOMO   SUM.  141 

He  reached  up  to  help  her ;  again  his  fingers  met 
hers,  and  again  he  felt  the  ecstatic  thrill  which  had 
haunted  his  memory  day  and  night  ever  since  he 
first  had  felt  it.  At  this  instant  there  was  a  sudden 
noise  in  the  house  opposite ;  the  slaves  were  coming 
out  from  supper.  Sirona  knew  what  was  happen- 
ing ;  she  started  and  cried  out,  pointing  to  the 
Senator's  door,  "  For  all  the  gods'  sake !  they  are 
coming  out,  and  if  they  see  you  here  I  am  lost !  " 

Hernias  looked  hastily  round  the  court,  and  list- 
ened to  the  increasing  noise  in  the  other  house,  then, 
perceiving  that  there  was  no  possible  escape  from 
the  Senator's  people,  who  were  close  upon  him,  he 
cried  out  to  Sirona  in  a  commanding  tone,  "  Stand 
back,"  and  flung  himself  up  through  the  window 
into  the  Gaul's  apartment.  At  the  same  moment 
the  door  opposite  opened,  and  the  slaves  streamed 
out  into  the  yard. 

In  front  of  them  all  was  Miriam,  who  looked  all 
round  the  wide  space — expectant ;  seeking  some- 
thing, and  disappointed.  He  was  not  there,  and 
yet  she  had  heard  him  come  in ;  and  the  gate  had 
not  opened  and  closed  a  second  time,  of  that  she  was 
perfectly  certain.  Some  of  the  slaves  went  to  the 
stables,  others  went  outside  the  gate  into  the  street 
to  enjoy  the  coolness  of  the  evening ;  they  sat  in 
groups  on  the  ground,  looking  up  at  the  stars,  chat- 
tering or  singing.  Only  the  shepherdess  remained 
in  the  court -yard  seeking  him  on  all  sides,  as  if  she 
were  hunting  for  some  lost  trinket.  She  searched 
even  behind  the  mill-stones,  and  in  the  dark  sheds 


142  HOMO   SUM. 

in  which  the  stone-workers'  tools  were  kept.  Then 
she  stood  still  a  moment  and  clenched  her  hands ; 
with  a  few  light  bounds  she  sprang  into  the  shadow 
of  the  Gaul's  house.  Just  in  front  of  Sirona's  win- 
dow lay  the  steinbock ;  she  hastily  touched  it  with 
her  slender  naked  toes,  but  quickly  withdrew  her 
foot  with  a  shudder,  for  it  had  touched  the  beast's 
fresh  wound,  wet  with  its  blood.  She  rapidly  drew" 
the  conclusion  that  he  had  killed  it,  and  had  thrown 
it  down  here,  and  that  he  could  not  be  far  off.  Now 
she  knew  where  he  was  in  hiding — and  she  tried  to 
laugh,  for  the  pain  she  felt  seemed  too  acute  and 
burning  for  tears  to  allay  or  cool  it.  But  she  did 
not  wrholly  lose  her  power  of  reflection.  "They 
are  in  the  dark,"  thought  she,  "  and  they  would  see 
me,  if  I  crept  under  the  window  to  listen ;  and  yet 
I  must  know  what  they  are  doing  there  together." 

She  hastily  turned  her  back  on  Sirona's  house, 
slipped  into  the  clear  moonlight,  and  after  standing 
there  for  a  few  minutes,  went  into  the  slaves'  quar- 
ters. An  instant  after,  she  slipped  out  behind  the 
mill-stones,  and  crept  as  cleverly  and  as  silently  as 
a  snake  along  the  ground  under  the  darkened  base  of 
the  centurion's  house,  and  lay  close  under  Sirona's 
window. 

Her  loudly  beating  heart  made  it  difficult  for  even 
her  sharp  ears  to  hear,  but  though  she  could  not 
gather  all  that  he  said,  she  distinguished  the  sound 
of  his  voice ;  he  was  no  longer  in  Sirona's  room, 
but  in  the  room  that  looked  out  on  the  street. 

Now  she  could  venture  to  raise  herself,  and  to 


HOMO   SUM.  143 

look  in  at  the  open  window  ;  the  door  of  communi- 
cation between  the  two  rooms  was  closed,  but  a 
streak  of  light  showed  her  that  in  the  farther  room, 
which  was  the  sitting-room,  a  lamp  was  burning. 

She  had  already  put  up  her  hand  in  order  to  hoist 
herself  up  into  the  dark  room,  when  a  gay  laugh 
from  Sirona  fell  upon  her  ear.  The  image  of  her 
enemy  rose  up  before  her  mind,  brilliant  and  flooded 
with  light  as  on  that  morning,  when  Hermas  had 
stood  just  opposite,  bewildered  by  her  fascination. 
And  now — now — he  was  actually  lying  at  her  feet, 
and  saying  sweet  flattering  words  to  her,  and  he 
would  speak  to  her  of  love,  and  stretch  out  his  arm 
to  clasp  her — but  she  had  laughed. 

Now  she  laughed  again.  Why  was  all  so  still 
again  ?  Had  she  offered  her  rosy  lips  for  a  kiss  ? 
No  doubt,  no  doubt.  And  Hermas  did  not  wrench 
himself  from  her  white  arms,  as  he  had  torn  himself 
from  hers  that  noon  by  the  spring — torn  himself 
away  never  to  return. 

Cold  drops  stood  on  her  brow,  she  buried  her  hands 
in  her  thick,  black  hair,  and  a  loud  cry  escaped  her 
— a  cry  like  that  of  a  tortured  animal.  A  few  min- 
utes more  and  she  had  slipped  through  the  stable 
and  the  gate  by  which  they  drove  the  cattle  in  ;  and 
no  longer  mistress  of  herself,  was  flying  up  the 
mountain  to  the  grotto  of  Mithras  to  warn  Phosbi- 
cius. 

The  anchorite  Gelasius  saw  from  afar  the  figure 
of  the  girl  flying  up  the  mountain  in  the  moonlight, 
and  her  shadow  flitting  from  stone  to  stone,  and  he 


144  HOMO  SUM. 

threw  himself  on  the  ground,  and  signed  a  cross  on 
his  brow,  for  he  thought  he  saw  a  goblin-form,  one  of 
the  myriad  gods  of  the  heathen — an  Oread  pursued 
by  a  Satyr. 

Sirona  had  heard  the  girl's  shriek. 

"  What  was  that  ? "  she  asked  the  youth,  who 
stood  before  her  in  the  full-dress  uniform  of  a  Roman 
officer,  as  handsome  as  the  young  god  of  war,  though 
awkward  and  unsoldierly  in  his  movements. 

"  An  owl  screamed —  '  replied  Hermas.  "  My 
father  must  at  last  tell  me  from  what  house  we  are 
descended,  and  I  will  go  to  Byzantium,  the  new  Rome, 
and  say  to  the  Emperor,  '  Here  am  I,  and  I  will 
fight  for  you  among  your  warriors.' ' 

"  I  like  you  so ! "  exclaimed  Sirona. 

"  If  that  is  the  truth,"  cried  Hermas,  "  prove  it  to 
me !  Let  me  once  press  my  lips  to  your  shining 
gold  hair.  You  are  beautiful,  as  sweet  as  a  flower 
— as  gay  and  bright  as  a  bird,  and  yet  as  hard  as 
our  mountain  rock.  If  you  do  not  grant  me  one  kiss, 
I  shall  long  till  I  am  sick  and  weak  before  I  can  get 
away  from  here,  and  prove  my  strength  in  battle." 

"  And  if  I  yield,"  laughed  Sirona,  "  you  will  be 
wanting  another  and  another  kiss,  and  at  last  not 
get  away  at  all.  No,  no,  my  friend — I  am  the  wiser 
of  us  two.  Now  go  into  the  dark  room,  I  will  look 
out  and  see  whether  the  people  are  gone  in  again, 
and  whether  JTOU  can  get  off  unseen  from  the  street 
window,  for  you  have  been  here  much  too  long  al- 
ready. Do  you  hear  ? — I  command  you." 

Hermas  obeyed  with  a  sigh;  Sirona  opened  the 


HOMO   SUM.  145 

shutter  and  looked  out.  The  slaves  were  coming 
back  into  the  court,  and  she  called  out  a  friendly 
word  or  two,  which  were  answered  with  equal  friend- 
liness, for  the  Gaulish  lady,  who  never  overlooked 
even  the  humblest,  was  dear  to  them  all.  She  took 
in  the  night-air  with  deep-drawn  breaths,  and  looked 
up  contentedly  at  the  moon,  for  she  was  well  content 
with  herself. 

"When  Hermas  had  swung  himself  up  into  her 
room,  she  had  started  back  in  alarm  ;  he  had  seized 
her  hand,  and  pressed  his  burning  lips  to  her  arm, 
and  she  let  him  do  it,  for  she  was  overcome  with 
strange  bewilderment.  Then  she  heard  Dame  Dor- 
othea calling  out, "  Directly,  directly,  I  will  only  say 
good  night  first  to  the  children." 

These  simple  words,  uttered  in  Dorothea's  voice, 
had  a  magical  effect  on  the  warm-hearted  woman 
— badly  used  and  suspected  as  she  was,  and  yet 
so  well  formed  for  happiness,  love,  and  peace. 
When  her  husband  had  locked  her  in,  taking  even 
her  slave  with  him,  at  first  she  had  raved,  wept, 
meditated  revenge  and  flight,  and  at  last,  quite 
broken  down,  had  seated  herself  by  the  window  in 
silent  thought  of  her  beautiful  home,  her  brothers 
and  sisters,  and  the  dark  olive-groves  of  Arelas. 

Then  Hermas  appeared.  It  had  not  escaped  her 
that  the  young  anchorite  passionately  admired  her, 
and  she  was  not  displeased,  for  she  liked  him,  and 
the  confusion  with  which  he  had  been  overcome  at 
the  sight  of  her  flattered  her,  and  seemed  to  her 
doubly  precious  because  she  knew  that  the  hermit 

?9 


146  HOMO   SUM. 

in  his  sheepskin,  on  whom  she  had  bestowed  a  gift 
of  wine,  was  in  fact  a  young  man  of  distinguished 
rank.  And  how  truly  to  be  pitied  was  the  poor  boy, 
who  had  had  his  youth  spoilt  by  a  stern  father.  A 
woman  easily  bestows  some  tender  feeling  on  the 
man  that  she  pities ;  perhaps  because  she  is  grateful 
to  him  for  the  pleasure  of  feeling  herself  the  stronger, 
and  because  through  him  and  his  suffering  she  finds 
gratification  for  the  noblest  happiness  of  a  woman's 
heart — that  of  giving  tender  and  helpful  care ;  wo- 
men's hands  are  softer  than  ours.  In  men's  hearts 
love  is  commonly  extinguished  when  pity  begins, 
while  admiration  acts  like  sunshine  on  the  budding 
plant  of  a  woman's  inclination,  and  pity  is  the  glory 
which  radiates  from  her  heart. 

Neither  admiration  nor  pity,  however,  would  have 
been  needed  to  induce  Sirona  to  call  Hermas  to  her 
window ;  she  felt  so  unhappy  and  lonely,  that  any 
one  must  have  seemed  welcome  from  whom  she 
might  look  for  a  friendly  and  encouraging  word  to 
revive  her  deeply  wounded  self-respect.  And  there 
came  the  young  anchorite,  who  forgot  himself  and 
everything  else  in  her  presence,  whose  looks,  whose 
movement,  whose  very  silence  even  seemed  to  do 
homage  to  her.  And  then  his  bold  spring  into  her 
room,  and  his  eager  wooing — "  This  is  love,"  said 
she  to  herself.  Her  cheeks  glowed,  and  when  Her- 
mas clasped  her  hand,  and  pressed  her  arm  to  his 
lips,  she  could  not  repulse  him,  till  Dorothea's  voice 
reminded  her  of  the  worthy  lady  and  of  the  children, 
and  through  them  of  her  own  far-off  sisters. 


HOMO   SUM.  147 

The  thought  of  these  pure  beings  flowed  over  her 
troubled  spirit  like  a  purifying  stream,  and  the  ques- 
tion passed  through  her  mind,  "  What  should  I  be 
•without  those  good  folks  over  there,  and  is  this  great 
love-sick  boy,  who  stood  before  Polykarp  just  lately 
looking  like  a  school-boy,  is  he  so  worthy  that  I 
should  for  his  sake  give  up  the  right  of  looking  them 
boldly  in  the  face  ? "  And  she  pushed  Hermas 
roughly  away,  just  as  he  was,  venturing  for  the 
first  time  to  apply  his  lips  to  her  perfumed  gold 
hair,  and  desired  him  to  be  less  forward,  and  to  re- 
lease her  hand. 

She  spoke  in  a  low  voice,  but  with  such  decision, 
that  the  lad,  who  was  accustomed  to  the  habit  of 
obedience,  unresistingly  allowed  her  to  push  him  into 
the  sitting-room.  There  was  a  lamp  burning  on 
the  table,  and  on  a  bench  by  the  wall  of  the  room, 
which  was  lined  with  colored  stucco,  lay  the  helmet, 
the  centurion's  staff,  and  the  other  portions  of  the 
armor  which  Phcebicius  had  taken  off  before  set. 
ting  out  for  the  feast  of  Mithras,  in  order  to  assume 
the  vestments  of  one  of  the  initiated  of  the  grade  of 
"  Lion." 

The  lamplight  revealed  Sirona's  figure,  and  as 
she  stood  before  him  in  all  her  beauty  with  glowing 
cheeks,  the  lad's  heart  began  to  beat  high,  and  with 
increased  boldness  he  opened  his  arms,  and  endeav- 
ored to  draw  her  to  him ;  but  Sirona  avoided  him 
and  went  behind  the  table,  and,  leaning  her  hands 
on  its  polished  surface  while  it  protected  her  like  a 
shield,  she  lectured  him  in  wise  and  almost  motherly 


148  HOMO   SUM. 

words  against  his  rash,  intemperate,  and  unbecom- 
ing behavior. 

Any  one  who  was  learned  in  the  heart  of  woman 
might  have  smiled  at  such  words  from  such  lips  and 
in  such  an  hour ;  but  Hermas  blushed  and  cast  down 
his  eyes,  and  knew  not  what  to  answer.  A  great 
change  had  come  over  the  Gaulish  lady  ;  she  felt  a 
great  pride  in  her  virtue,  and  in  the  victory  she  had 
won  over  herself,  and  while  she  sunned  herself  in 
the  splendor  of  her  own  merits,  she  wished  that  Her- 
mas too  should  feel  and  recognize  them.  She  began 
to  expatiate  on  all  that  she  had  to  forego  and  to  en- 
dure in  the  oasis,  and  she  discoursed  of  virtue  and 
the  duties  of  a  wife,  and  of  the  wickedness  and  au- 
dacity of  men. 

Hermas,  she  said,  was  no  better  than  the  rest,  and 
because  she  had  shown  herself  somewhat  kind  to 
him,  he  fancied  already  that  he  had  a  claim  on  her 
liking;  but  he  was  greatly  mistaken,  and  if  only 
the  court-yard  had  been  empty,  she  would  long  ago 
have  shown  him  the  door. 

The  young  hermit  was  soon  only  half  listening  to 
all  she  said,  for  his  attention  had  been  riveted  by  the 
armor  which  lay  before  him,  and  which  gave  a  new 
direction  to  his  excited  feelings.  He  involuntarily 
put  out  his  hand  towards  the  gleaming  helmet,  and 
interrupted  the  pretty  preacher  with  the  question? 
"  May  I  try  it  on «" 

Sirona  laughed  out  loud  and  exclaimed,  much 
amused  and  altogether  diverted  from  her  train  of 
thought,  "  To  be  sure,  You  ought  to  be  a  soldier. 


HOMO   SUM.  149 

How  well  it  suits  you  !  Take  off  your  nasty  sheep- 
skin, and  let  us  see  how  the  anchorite  looks  as  a 
centurion." 

Hermas  needed  no  second  telling;  he  decked  him- 
self in  the  Gaul's  armor  with  Sirona's  help.  We 
human  beings  must  indeed  be  in  a  deplorable  plight ; 
otherwise  how  is  it  that  from  our  earliest  years  we 
find  such  delight  in  disguising  ourselves ;  that  is  to 
say,  in  sacrificing  our  own  identity  to  the  tastes  of 
another  whose  aspect  we  borrow.  The  child  shares 
this  inexplicable  pleasure  with  the  sage,  and  the 
stern  man  who  should  condemn  it  would  not  there- 
fore be  the  wiser,  for  he  who  wholly  abjures  folly 
is  a  fool  all  the  more  certainly  the  less  he  fancies 
himself  one.  Even  dressing  others  has  a  peculiar 
charm,  especially  for  women ;  it  is  often  a  question 
which  has  the  greater  pleasure,  the  maid  who  dresses 
her  mistress  or  the  lady  who  wears  the  costly 
garment. 

Sirona  was  devoted  to  every  sort  of  masquerad- 
ing. If  it  had  been  needful  to  seek  a  reason  why 
the  Senator's  children  and  grandchildren  were  so 
fond  of  her,  by  no  means  last  or  least  would  have 
been  the  fact  that  she  would  willingly  and  cheerfully 
allow  herself  to  be  tricked  out  in  colored  kerchiefs, 
ribbons,  and  flowers,  and  on  her  part  could  contrive 
the  most  fantastic  costumes  for  them.  So  soon  as 
she  saw  Hermas  with  the  helmet  on,  the  fancy  seized 
her  to  carry  through  the  travesty  he  had  begun. 
She  eagerly  and  in  perfect  innocence  pulled  the  coat 
of  armor  straight,  helped  him  to  buckle  the  breast- 


150  HOMO  SUM. 

plate  and  to  fasten  on  the  sword,  and  as  she  per- 
formed the  task,  at  which  Hennas  proved  himself 
unskilled  enough,  her  gay  and  pleasant  laugh  rang 
out  again  and  again.  When  he  sought  to  seize  her 
hand,  as  he  not  seldom  did,  she  hit  him  sharply  onr 
the  fingers,  and  scolded  him. 

Hernias'  embarrassment  thawed  before  this  pleas- 
ant sport,  and  soon  he  began  to  tell  her  how  hateful 
the  lonely  life  on  the  mountain  was  to  him.  He 
told  her  that  Petrus  himself  had  advised  him  to  try 
his  strength  out  in  the  world,  and  he  confided  to 
her  that  if  his  father  got  well,  he  meant  to  be  a 
soldier,  and  do  great  deeds.  She  quite  agreed  with 
him,  praised  and  encouraged  him,  then  she  criticised 
his  slovenly  deportment,  showed  him  with  comical 
gravity  how  a  warrior  ought  to  stand  and  walk, 
called  herself  his  drill-master,  and  was  delighted  at 
the  zeal  with  which  he  strove  to  imitate  her. 

In  such  play  the  hours  passed  quickly.  Hermas 
was  proud  of  himself  in  his  soldierly  garb,  and  was 
happy  in  her  presence  and  in  the  hope  of  future  tri- 
umphs ;  and  Sirona  was  gay,  as  she  had  usually  been 
only  when  playing  with  the  children,  so  that  even 
Miriam's  wild  cry,  which  the  youth  explained  to  be 
the  scream  of  an  owl,  only  for  a  moment  reminded 
her  of  the  danger  in  which  she  was  placing  herself. 
Petrus'  slaves  had  long  gone  to  rest  before  she 
began  to  weary  of  amusing  herself  with  Hermas, 
and  desired  him  to  lay  aside  her  husband's  equip- 
ment, and  to  leave  her.  Hermas  .obeyed  while  she 
warily  opened  the  shutters,  and  turning  to  him,  said, 


HOMO  SUM.  151 

"  You  cannot  venture  through  the  court-yard  ;  you 
must  go  through  this  window  into  the  open  street. 
But  ther§  is  some  one  coming  down  the  road ;  let 
him  pass  first,  it  will  not  be  long  to  wait,  for  he  is 
walking  quickly." 

She  carefully  drew  the  shutters  to,  and  laughed  to 
see  how  clumsily  Hernias  set  to  work  to  unbuckle 
the  greaves ;  but  the  gay  laugh  died  upon  her  lips 
when  the  gate  flew  open,  the  greyhound  and  the 
Senator's  watch  dogs  barked  loudly,  and  she  recog- 
nized her  husband's  voice  as  he  ordered  the  dogs  to 
be  quiet. 

"  Fly — fly — for  the  gods'  sake  ! "  she  cried  in  a 
trembling  voice.  With  that  ready  presence  of  mind 
with  which  destiny  arms  the  weakest  woman  in  great 
and  sudden  danger,  she  extinguished  the  lamp,  flung 
open  the  shutter,  and  pushed  Hernias  to  the  win- 
dow. The  boy  did  not  stay  to  bid  her  farewell,  but 
swung  himself  with  a  strong  leap  down  into  the 
road,  and,  followed  by  the  barking  of  the  dogs, 
which  roused  all  the  neighboring  households,  he  flew 
up  the  street  to  the  little  church. 

He  had  not  got  more  than  half-way  when  he  saw 
a  man  coming  towards  him;  he  sprang  into  the 
shadow  of  a  house,  but  the  belated  walker  acceler- 
ated his  steps,  and  came  straight  up  to  him.  He  set 
off  running  again,  but  the  other  pursued  him,  and 
kept  close  at  his  heels  till  he  had  passed  all  the 
houses  and  began  to  go  up  the  mountain-path.  Her- 
mas  felt  that  he  was  outstripping  his  pursuer,  and 
was  making  ready  for  a  spring  over  a  block  of  stone 


152  HOMO   SUM. 

that  encumbered  the  path,  when  he  heard  his  name 
called  behind  him,  and  he  stood  still,  for  he  recog- 
nized the  voice  of  the  man  from  whom  he  was  flying 
as  that  of  his  good  friend  Paulus. 

"  You  indeed !  "  said  the  Alexandrian,  panting  for 
breath.  "  Yes,  you  are  swifter  than  I.  Years  hang 
lead  on  our  heels,  but  do  you  know  what  it  is  that 
lends  them  the  swiftest  wings?  You  have  just 
learned  it  1  It  is  a  bad  conscience ;  and  pretty 
things  will  be  told  about  you  ;  the  dogs  have  barked 
it  all  out  loud  enough  to  the  night." 

"  And  so  they  may !  "  replied  Hermas  defiantly, 
and  trying  in  vain  to  free  himself  from  the  strong 
grasp  of  the  anchorite  who  held  him  firmly,  "I 
have  done  nothing  wrong." 

"  Thou  shalt  not  covet  thy  neighbor's  wife  ! "  in- 
terrupted Paulus  in  a  tone  of  stern  severity.  "  You 
have  been  with  the  centurion's  pretty  wife,  and 
were  taken  by  surprise.  "Where  is  your  sheepskin  ? " 

Hermas  started,  felt  on  his  shoulder,  and  exclaimed, 
striking  his  fist  against  his  forehead,  "  Merciful 
Heaven! — I  have  left  it  there!  The  raging  Gaul 
will  find  it. " 

"He  did  not  actually  see  you  there?"  asked 
Paulus  eagerly. 

"  No,  certainly  not,"  groaned  Hermas,  "  but  the 
skin—" 

"  "Well,  well,"  muttered  Paulus.  "  Your  sin  is 
none  the  less,  but  something  may  be  done  in  that 
case.  Only  think  if  it  came  to  your  father's  ears  ; 
it  might  cost  him  his  life." 


HOMO   SUM.  153 

"  And  that  poor  Sirona ! "  sighed  Hermas. 

"  Leave  me  to  settle  that,"  exclaimed  Paulus." 
"  I  will  make  everything  straight  with  her.  There, 
take  my  sheepskin.  You  will  not?  Well,  to  be 
sure,  the  man  who  does  not  fear  to  commit  adultery 
would  make  nothing  of  becoming  his  father's  mur- 
derer.— There,  that  is  the  way  !  fasten  it  together 
over  your  shoulders  ;  you  will  need  it,  for  you  must 
quit  this  spot,  and  not  for  to-day  and  to-morrow  only. 
You  wanted  to  go  out  into  the  world,  and  now  you 
will  have  the  opportunity  of  showing  whether  you 
really  are  capable  of  walking  on  your  own  feet. 
First  go  to  Rai'thu  and  greet  the  pious  Nikon  in  my 
name,  and  tell  him  that  I  remain  here  on  the  mount- 
ain, for  after  long  praying  in  the  church  I  have 
found  myself  unworthy  of  the  office  of  elder  which 
they  offered  me.  Then  get  yourself  carried  by 
some  ship's  captain  across  the  Red  Sea,  and  wander 
up  and  down  the  Egyptian  coast.  The  hordes  of 
the  Blemmyes  have  lately  shown  themselves  there ; 
keep  your  eye  on  them,  and  when  the  wild  bands 
are  plotting  some  fresh  outbreak  you  can  warn  the 
watch  on  the  mountain-peak  ;  how  to  cross  the  sea 
and  so  outstrip  them,  it  will  be  your  business  to 
find  out.  Do  you  feel  bold  enough  and  capable  of 
accomplishing  this  task  ?  Yes  ?  So  I  expected ! 
Now  may  the  Lord  guide  you.  I  will  take  care  of 
your  father,  and  his  blessing  and  your  mother's  will 
rest  upon  you  if  you  sincerely  repent,  and  if  you 
now  do  your  duty." 

"  You  shall  learn  that  I  am  a  man,"  cried  Hermas 


154  HOMO  SUM. 

with  sparkling  eyes.  "  My  bow  and  arrows  are  ly- 
ing in  your  cave,  I  will  fetch  them  and  then — aye !  you 
shall  see  whether  you  sent  the  right  man  on  the 
errand.  Greet  my  father,  and  once  more  give  me 
your  hand." 

Paulus  grasped  the  boy's  right  hand,  drew  him  to 
him,  and  kissed  his  forehead  with  fatherly  tender- 
ness. Then  he  said, 

"  In  my  cave,  under  the  green  stone,  you  will  find 
six  gold-pieces;  take  three  of  them  with  you  on 
your  journey.  You  will  probably  need  them — at 
any  rate  to  pay  your  passage.  Now  be  off,  and  get 
to  Rai'thu  in  good  time." 

Hermas  hurried  up  the  mountain,  his  head  full  of 
the  important  task  that  had  been  laid  upon  him ; 
dazzling  visions  of  the  great  deeds  he  was  to  accom- 
plish eclipsed  the  image  of  the  fair  Sirona,  and  he 
was  so  accustomed  to  believe  in  the  superior  insight 
and  kindness  of  Paulus  that  he  feared  no  longer  for 
Sirona  now  that  his  friend  had  made  her  affair  his 
own. 

The  Alexandrian  looked  after  him,  and  breathed  a 
short  prayer  for  him ;  then  he  went  down  again  into 
the  valley. 

It  was  long  past  midnight,  and  the  moon  was 
sinking ;  it  grew  cooler  and  cooler,  and  since  he  had 
given  his  sheep-skin  to  Hermas  he  had  nothing  on,  but 
his  threadbare  coat.  Nevertheless  he  went  slowly 
onwards,  stopping  every  now  and  then,  moving  his 
arms,  and  speaking  incoherent  words  in  a  low  tone 
to  himself. 


HOMO  SUM.  155 

He  thought  of  Hernias  and  Sirona,  of  his  own 
youth,  and  of  how  in  Alexandria  he  himself  had 
tapped  at  the  shutters  of  the  dark-haired  Aso,  and  the 
fair  Simaitha. 

"  A  child — a  mere  boy,"  he  murmured.  "  Who 
would  have  thought  it  ?  The  Gaulish  woman  no 
doubt  may  be  handsome,  and  as  for  him,  it  is  a  fact, 
that  as  he  threw  the  discus  I  was  myself  surprised 
at  his  noble  figure.  And  his  eyes — aye,  he  has 
Magdalen's  eyes !  If  the  Gaul  had  found  him  with 
his  wife,  and  had  run  his  sword  through  his  heart, 
he  would  have  gone  unpunished  by  the  earthly  judge 
— however,  his  father  is  spared  this  sorrow.  In  this 
desert  the  old  man  thought  that  his  darling  could 
not  be  touched  by  the  world  and  its  pleasures.  And 
now  ?  These  brambles  I  once  thought  lay  dried  up 
on  the  earth,  and  could  never  get  up  to  the  top  of 
the  palm-tree  where  the  dates  ripen,  but  a  bird  flew 
by,  and  picked  up  the  berries,  and  carried  them  into 
its  nest  at  the  highest  point  of  the  tree. 

"  Who  can  point  out  the  road  that  another  will 
take,  and  say  to-day,  '  To-morrow  I  shall  find  him 
thus  and  not  otherwise.' 

"  We  fools  flee  into  the  desert  in  order  to  forget 
the  world,  and  the  world  pursues  us  and  clings  to 
our  skirts.  Where  are  the  shears  that  are  keen 
enough  to  cut  the  shadow  from  beneath  our  feet  ? 
What  is  the  prayer  that  can  effectually  release  us — 
born  of  the  flesh — from  the  burden  of  the  flesh  ? 
My  Redeemer,  Thou  Only  One,  who  knowest  it, 
teach  it  to  me,  the  basest  of  the  base." 


156  HOMO   SUM. 


CHAPTER  X. 

WITHIN  a  few  minutes  after  Hermas  had  flung 
himself  out  of  window  into  the  roadway,  Phcebicius 
walked  into  his  sleeping-room.  Sirona  had  had  time 
to  throw  herself  on  to  her  couch ;  she  was  terribly 
frightened,  and  had  turned  her  face  to  the  wall. 
Did  he  actually  know  that  some  one  had  been  with 
her?  And  who  could  have  betrayed  her,  and  have 
called  him  home  ?  Or  could  he  have  come  home  by 
accident  sooner  than  usual  ? 

It  was  dark  in  the  room,  and  he  could  not  see  her 
face,  and  yet  she  kept  her  eyes  shut  as  if  asleep,  for 
every  fraction  of  a  minute  in  which  she  could  still 
escape  seeing  him  in  his  fury  seemed  a  reprieve ; 
and  yet  her  heart  beat  so  violently  that  it  seemed  to 
her  that  he  must  hear  it,  when  he  approached  the 
bed  with  a  soft  step  that  was  peculiar  to  him.  She 
heard  him  walk  up  and  down,  and  at  last  go  into  the 
kitchen  that  adjoined  the  sleeping-room.  In  a  few 
moments  she  perceived  through  her  half-closed  eyes, 
that  he  had  brought  in  a  light ;  he  had  lighted  a 
lamp  at  the  hearth,  and  now  searched  both  the 
rooms. 

As  yet  he  had  not  spoken  to  her,  nor  opened  his 
lips  to  utter  a  word. 

Now  he  was  in  the  sitting-room,  and  now — invol- 


HOMO   SUM.  157 

untarily  she  drew  herself  into  a  heap,  and  pulled  the 
coverlet  over  her  head — now  he  laughed  aloud,  so 
loud  and  scornfully,  that  she  felt  her  hands  and  feet 
turn  cold,  and  a  rushing  crimson  mist  floated  before 
her  eyes.  Then  tbe  light  came  back  into  the  bed- 
room, and  came  nearer  and  nearer.  She  felt  her 
head  pushed  by  his  hard  hand,  and  with  a  feeble 
scream  she  flung  off  the  coverlet  and  sat  up. 

Still  he  did  not  speak  a  word,  but  what  she  saw 
was  quite  enough  to  smother  the  last  spark  of  her 
courage  and  hope,  for  her  husband's  eyes  showed 
only  the  whites,  his  sallow  features  were  ashy-pale, 
and  on  his  brow  the  branded  mark  of  Mithras  stood 
out  more  clearly  than  ever.  In  his  right  hand  he 
held  the  lamp,  in  his  left  Hernias'  sheep-skin. 

As  his  haggard  eye  met  hers  he  held  the  ancho- 
rite's matted  garment  so  close  to  her  face,  that  it 
touched  her.  Then  he  threw  it  violently  on  the 
floor,  and  asked  in  a  low,  husky  voice,  "  What  is 
that?" 

She  was  silent.  He  went  up  to  the  little  table 
near  her  bed ;  on  it  stood  her  night-draught  in  a 
pretty  colored  glass,  that  Polykarp  had  brought  her 
from  Alexandria  as  a  token,  and  with  the  back  of 
his  hand  he  swept  it  from  the  table,  so  that  it  fell 
on  the  dais,  and  flew  with  a  crash  into  a  thousand 
fragments.  She  screamed,  the  greyhound  sprang  up 
and  barked  at  the  Gaul.  He  seized  the  little  beast's 
collar,  and  flung  it  so  violently  across  the  room,  that 
it  uttered  a  pitiful  cry  of  pain.  The  dog  had  be- 
longed to  Sirona  since  she  was  quite  a  girl,  it  had 


158  HOMO   SUM. 

come  with  her  to  Rome,  and  from  thence  to  the 
oasis ;  it  clung  to  her  with  affection,  and  she  to  it, 
for  lambe  liked  no  one  to  caress  and  stroke  her  so 
much  as  her  mistress.  She  was  so  much  alone,  and 
the  greyhound  was  always  with  her,  and  not  only 
entertained  her  by  such  tricks  as  any  other  dog 
might  have  learned,  but  was  to  her  a  beloved,  dumb, 
but  by  no  means  deaf,  companion  from  her  early 
home,  who  would  prick  its  ears  when  she  spoke  the 
name  of  her  dear  little  sisters  in  distant  Arelas,  from 
whom  she  had  not  heard  for  years ;  or  it  would 
look  sadly  in  her  face,  and  kiss  her  white  hands 
when  longing  forced  tears  into  her  eyes. 

In  her  solitary,  idle,  childless  existence  lambe 
was  much,  very  much,  to  her,  and  now  as  she  saw 
her  faithful  companion  and  friend  creep  ill-treated 
and  whining  up  to  her  bed — as  the  supple  animal 
tried  in  vain  to  spring  up  and  take  refuge  in  her 
lap,  and  held  out  to  his  mistress  his  trembling, 
perhaps  broken,  little  paw,  fear  vanished  from  the 
miserable  young  woman's  heart — she  sprang  from 
her  couch,  took  the  little  dog  in  her  arms,  and  ex- 
claimed with  a  glance,  which  flashed  with  anything 
rather  than  fear  or  repentance. 

"  You  do  not  touch  the  poor  little  beast  again,  if 
you  take  my  advice." 

"I  will  drown  it  to-morrow  morning,"  replied 
Phcebicius  with  perfect  indifference,  but  with  an 
evil  smile  on  his  flaccid  lips.  "  So  many  two-legged 
lovers  make  themselves  free  to  my  house,  that  I  do 
not  see  why  I  should  share  your  affections  with  a 


HOMO  SUM.  159 

quadruped  into  the  bargain.  How  came  this  sheep- 
skin here  ? "  Sirona  vouchsafed  no  answer  to  this 
last  question,  but  she  exclaimed  in  great  excitement, 
"  By  God- — by  your  God — by  the  mighty  Eock,  and 
by  all  the  gods !  if  you  do  the  little  beast  a  harm, 
it  will  be  the  last  day  I  stop  in  your  house." 

"  Hear  her ! "  said  the  centurion,  "  and  where  do 
you  propose  to  travel  to  ?  The  desert  is  wide  and 
there  is  room  and  to  spare  to  starve  in  it,  and  for 
your  bones  to  bleach  there.  How  grieved  your 
lovers  would  be — for  their  sakes  I  will  take  care 
before  drowning  the  dog  to  lock  in  its  mistress." 

"  Only  try  to  touch  me,"  screamed  Sirona  beside 
herself,  and  springing  to  the  window.  "  If  you 
lay  a  finger  on  me,  I  will  call  for  help,  and  Dor- 
othea and  her  husband  will  protect  me  against 
you." 

"  Hardly,"  answered  Phcebicius  dryly.  "  It  would 
suit  you  no  doubt  to  find  yourself  under  the  same 
roof  as  that  great  boy  who  brings  you  colored  glass, 
and  throws  roses  into  your  window,  and  perhaps 
has  strewed  the  road  with  them  by  which  he  found 
his  way  to  you  to-day.  But  there  are  nevertheless 
laws  which  protect  the  Roman  citizen  from  criminals 
and  impudent  seducers.  You  were  always  a  great 
deal  too  much  in  the  house  over  there,  and  you  have 
exchanged  your  games  with  the  little  screaming 
beggars  for  one  with  tho  grown-up  child,  the  rose- 
thrower — the  fop,  who,  for  your  sake,  and  not  to  be 
recognized,  covers  up  his  purple  coat  with  a  sheep- 
skin !  Do  you  think,  you  can  teach  me  anything 


l6o  HOMO   SUM. 

about  lovesick  night-wanderers  and  women  ?  I  see 
through  it  all !  Not  one  step  do  you  set  hence- 
forth across  Petrus'  threshold.  There  is  the  open 
window — scream — scream  as  loud  as  you  will,  and 
let  all  the  people  know  of  your  disgrace.  I  have  the 
greatest  mind  to  carry  this  sheep-skin  to  the  judge, 
the  first  thing  in  the  morning.  I  shall  go  now,  and 
set  the  room  behind  the  kitchen  in  order  for  you ; 
there  is  no  window  there  through  which  men  in 
sheep-skin  can  get  into  my  house.  You  shall  live 
there  till  you  are  tamed,  and  kiss  my  feet,  and  con- 
fess what  has  been  going  on  here  to-night.  I  shall 
learn  nothing  from  the  Senator's  slaves,  that  I  very 
well  know ;  for  you  have  turned  all  their  heads  too 
— they  grin  with  delight  when  they  see  you.  All 
friends  are  made  welcome  by  you,  even  when  they 
wear  nothing  but  sheep-skin.  But  they  may  do 
what  they  please — I  have  the  right  keeper  for  you  in 
my  own  hand.  I  am  going  at  once — you  may  scream 
if  you  like,  but  I  should  myself  prefer  that  you  should 
keep  quiet.  As  to  the  dog,  we  have  not  yet  heard 
the  last  of  the  matter ;  for  the  present  I  will  keep 
him  here.  If  you  are  quiet  and  come  to  your  senses, 
he  may  live  for  aught  I  care ;  but  if  you  are  refrac- 
tory, a  rope  and  a  stone  can  soon  be  found,  and  the 
stream  runs  close  below.  You  know  I  never  jest — 
least  of  all  just  now." 

Sirona's  whole  frame  was  in  the  most  violent 
agitation.  Her  breath  came  quickly,  her  limbs 
trembled,  but  she  could  not  find  words  to  answer 
kirn, 


HOMO   SUM.  l6l 

Phcebicius  saw  what  was  passing  in  her  mind,  and 
he  went  on.  "  You  may  snort  proudly  now  ;  but  an 
hour  will  come  when  you  will  crawl  up  to  me  like 
your  lame  dog,  and  pray  for  mercy.  I  have  another 
idea — you  will  want  a  couch  in  the  dark  room,  and 
it  must  be  soft,  or  I  shall  be  blamed  ;  I  will  spread 
out  the  sheep-skin  for  you.  You  see  I  know  how  to 
value  your  adorer's  offerings." 

The  Gaul  laughed  loud,  seized  the  hermit's  gar- 
ment, and  went  with  the  lamp  into  the  dark  room 
behind  the  kitchen,  in  which  vessels  and  utensils  of 
various  sorts  were  kept.  These  he  set  on  one  side 
to  turn  it  into  a  sleeping-room  for  his  wife,  of  whose 
guilt  he  was  fully  convinced. 

"Who  the  man  was  for  whose  sake  she  had  dis- 
honored him,  he  knew  not,  for  Miriam  had  said 
nothing  more  than,  "  Go  home,  your  wife  is  laugh- 
ing with  her  lover." 

While  her  husband  was  still  threatening  and 
stoqning,  Sirona  had  said  to  herself,  that  she  would 
Wrather  die  than  live  any  longer  with  this  man.  That 
she  herself  was  not  free  from  fault  never  occurred 
to  her  mind'.  He  who  is  punished  more  severely 
than  he  deserves,  easily  overlooks  his  own  fault  in 
his  feeling  of  the  judge's  injustice. 

Phoebicius  was  right ;  neither  Petrus  nor  Dorothea 
had  it  in  their  power  to  protect  her  against  him, 
a  Roman  citizen.  If  she  could  not  contrive  to  help 
herself  she  was  a  prisoner,  and  without  air,  ligbt, 
and  freedom  she  could  not  live.  During  his  last 
speech  her  resolution  had  been  quickly  matured,  and 


ii 


l62  HOMO   SUM. 

hardly  had  he  turned  his  back  and  crossed  the 
threshold,  than  she  hurried  up  to  her  bed,  wrapped 
the  trembling  greyhound  in  the  coverlet,  took  it  in 
her  arms  like  a  child,  and  ran  into  the  sitting-room 
with  her  light  burden  ;  the  shutters  were  still  open  of 
the  window  through  which  Hernias  had  fled  into  the 
open.  With  the  help  of  a  stool  she  took  the  same 
way,  let  herself  slip  down  from  the  sill  into  the  street, 
and  hastened  on  without  aim  or  goal — inspired  only 
by  the  wish  to  escape  durance  in  the  dark  room,  and 
to  burst  every  bond  that  tied  her  to  her  hated  mate 
— up  the  church-hill  and  along  the  road  which  lead 
over  the  mountain  to  the  sea. 

Phcebicius  gave  her  a  long  start,  for  after  having 
arranged  her  prison  he  remained  some  time  in  the 
little  room  behind  the  kitchen,  not  in  order  to  give 
her  time,  to  collect  his  thoughts  or  to  reflect  on  his 
future  action,  but  simply  because  he  felt  utterly  ex- 
hausted. 

The  centurion  was  nearly  sixty  years  of  age,  and  his 
frame,  originally  a  powerful  one,  was  now  broken  by 
every  sort  of  dissipation,  and  could  no  longer  resist 
the  effects  of  the  strain  and  excitement  of  this  night. 

The  lean,  wiry,  and  very  active  man  did  not  usually 
fall  into  these  fits  of  total  enervation  excepting  in 
the  daytime,  for  after  sun-down  a  wonderful  change 
would  come  over  the  grayheaded  veteran,  who 
nevertheless  still  displayed  much  youthful  energy  in 
the  exercise  of  his  official  duties.  At  night  his 
drooping  eyelids,  that  almost  veiled  his  eyes,  opened 
more  widely,  his  flaccid  hanging  under-lip  closed 


HOMO   SUM.  163 

firmly,  his  long  neck  and  narrow  elongated  head 
were  held  erect,  and  when,  at  a  later  hour,  he  went 
out  to  drinking-bouts  or  to  the  service  in  honor  of 
Mithras,  he  might  often  still  be  taken  for  a  fine,  in- 
domitable young  man. 

But  when  he  was  drunk  he  was  no  longer  gay,  but 
wild,  braggart,  and  noisy.  It  frequently  happened 
that  before  he  left  the  carouse,  while  he  was  still  in 
the  midst  of  his  boon-companions,  the  syncope  would 
come  upon  him  which  had  so  often  alarmed  Sirona, 
and  from  which  he  could  never  feel  perfectly  safe 
even  when  he  was  on  duty  at  the  head  of  his  soldiers. 

The  vehement  big  man  in  such  moments  offered  a 
terrible  image  of  helpless  impotence ;  the  paleness 
of  death  would  overspread  his  features,  his  back  was 
as  if  it  were  broken,  and  he  lost  his  control  over 
every  limb.  His  eyes  only  continued  to  move,  and 
now  and  then  a  shudder  shook  his  frame.  His  people 
said  that  when  he  was  in  this  condition,  the  centu- 
rion's ghastly  demon  had  entered  into  him,  and  he 
himself  believed  in  this  evil  spirit,  and  dreaded  it ; 
nay,  he  had  attempted  to  be  released  through  heathen 
spells,  and  even  through  Christian  exorcisms.  Now 
he  sat  in  the  dark  room  on  the  sheep-fell,  which  in 
scorn  of  his  wife  he  had  spread  on  a  hard  wooden 
bench.  His  hands  and  feet  turned  cold,  his  eyes 
glowed,  and  the  power  to  move  even  a  finger  had 
wholly  deserted  him ;  only  his  lips  twitched,  and  his 
inward  eye,  looking  back  on  the  past  with  preter- 
naturally  sharpened  vision,  saw  far  away  and  beyond 
the  last  frightful  hour. 


164  HOMO   SUM. 

"  If,"  thought  he,  "  after  my  mad  run  down  to 
the  oasis,  which  few  younger  men  could  have  vied 
with,  I  had  given  the  reins  to  my  fury  instead  of  re- 
straining it,  the  demon  would  not  have  mastered  me 
so  easily.  How  that  devil  Miriam's  eyes  flashed  as 
she  told  me  that  a  man  was  betraying  me.  She  cer- 
tainly must  have  seen  the  wearer  of  the  sheep-skin, 
but  I  lost  sight  of  her  before  I  reached  the  oasis  ;  I 
fancy  she  turned  and  went  up  the  mountain.  What 
indeed  might  not  Sirona  have  done  to  her  ?  That 
woman  snares  all  hearts  with  her  eyes  as  a  bird- 
catcher  snares  birds  with  his  flute.  How  the  fine 
gentlemen  ran  after  her  in  Rome !  Did  she  dishonor 
me  there,  I  wonder  ?  She  dismissed  the  Legate  Quin- 
tillus,  who  was  so  anxious  to  please  me — I  may  thank 
that  fool  of  a  woman  that  he  became  my  enemy — but 
he  was  older  even  than  I,  and  she  likes  young  men 
best.  She  is  like  all  the  rest  of  them,  and  I  of  all 
men  might  have  known  it.  It  is  the  way  of  the 
world  :  to-day  one  gives  a  blow  and  to-morrow  takes 
one." 

A  sad  smile  passed  over  his  lips,  then  his  features 
settled  into  a  stern  gravity,  for  various  unwelcome 
images  rose  clearly  before  his  mind,  and  would  not 
be  got  rid  of. 

His  conscience  stood  in  inverse  relation  to  the 
vigor  of  his  body.  When  he  was  well,  his  too  darkly 
stained  past  life  troubled  him  little ;  but  when  he 
was  unmanned  by  weakness,  he  was  incapable  of 
fighting  the  ghastly  demon  that  forced  upon  his 
memory  in  painful  vividness  those  very  deeds  which 


HOMO   SUM.  165 

he  would  most  willingly  have  forgotten.  In  such 
hours  he  must  need  remember  his  friend,  his  bene- 
factor, and  superior-officer,  the  Tribune  Servianus, 
Avhose  fair  young  wife  he  had  tempted  with  a 
thousand  arts  to  forsake  her  husband  and  child,  and 
fly  with  him  into  the  wide  world  ;  and  at  this  mo- 
ment a  bewildering  illusion  made  him  fancy  that  he 
was  the  Tribune  Servianus,  and  yet  at  the  same  time 
himself.  Every  hour  of  pain,  and  the  whole  bitter 
anguish  that  his  betrayed  benefactor  had  suffered 
through  his  act  when  he  had  seduced  Glycera,  he 
himself  now  seemed  to  realize,  and  at  the  same  time 
the  enemy  that  had  betrayed  him,  Servianus,  was 
none  other  than  himself,  Phcebicius,  the  Gaul.  He 
tried  to  protect  himself  and  meditated  revenge 
against  the  seducer,  and  still  he  could  not  altogether 
lose  the  sense  of  his  own  identity. 

This  whirl  of  mad  imagining,  which  he  vainly  en- 
deavored to  make  clear  to  himself,  threatened  to 
distract  his  reason,  and  he  groaned  aloud ;  the 
sound  of  his  own  voice  brought  him  back  to  actual- 
ity. 

He  was  Phcebicius  again  and  not  another,  that  he 
knew  now,  and  yet  he  could  not  completely  bring 
himself  to  comprehend  the  situation.  The  image  of 
the  lovely  Glycera,  who  had  followed  him  to  Alex- 
andria, and  whom  he  had  there  abandoned  when  he 
had  squandered  his  last  piece  of  money  and  her  last 
costly  jewels  in  the  Greek  city,  no  longer  appeared 
to  him  alone,  but  always  side  by  side  with  his  wife 
Sirona. 


t66  HOMO   SUM. 

Glycera  had  been  a  melancholy  sweetheart,  who 
had  wept  much,  and  laughed  little  after  running 
away  from  her  husband  ;  he  fancied  he  could  hear 
her  speaking  soft  words  of  reproach,  while  Sirona 
defied  him  with  loud  threats,  and  dared  to  nod  and 
signal  to  the  Senator's  son  Polykarp. 

The  weary  dreamer  angrily  shook  himself,  col- 
lected his  thoughts,  doubled  his  fist,  and  lifted  it 
angrily ;  this  movement  was  the  first  sign  of  return- 
ing physical  energy  ;  he  stretched  his  limbs  like  a 
man  awaking  from  sleep,  rubbed  his  eyes,  pressed 
his  hands  to  his  temples  ;  by  degrees  full  conscious- 
ness returned  to  him,  and  with  it  the  recollection  of 
all  that  had  occurred  in  the  last  hour  or  two. 

He  hastily  left  the  dark  room,  refreshed  himself 
in  the  kitchen  with  a  gulp  of  wine,  and  went  up  to 
the  open  window  to  gaze  at  the  stars. 

It  was  long  past  midnight  ;  he  Avas  reminded  of 
his  companions  now  sacrificing  on  the  mountain, 
and  addressed  a  long  prayer  "  to  the  crown,"  "  the 
invincible  sun-god,"  "  the  great  light,"  "  the  god  be- 
gotten of  the  rock,"  and  to  many  other  names  of 
Mithras ;  for  since  he  had  belonged  to  the  mystics 
of  this  divinity,  he  had  become  a  zealous  devotee, 
and  could  fast  too  with  extraordinary  constancy. 
He  had  already  passed  through  several  of  the  eighty 
trials,  to  which  a  man  had  to  subject  himself  before 
he  could  attain  to  the  highest  grades  of  the  initiated, 
and  the  weakness  which  had  just  now  overpowered 
him,  had  attacked  him  for  the  first  time,  after  he  had 
for  a  whole  week  lain  for  hours  in  the  snow,  be- 


HOMO   SUM.  167 

sides  fasting  severely  in  order  attain  the  grade  of 
"  lion." 

Sirona's  rigorous  mind  was  revolted  by  all  these 
practices,  and  the  decision  with  which  she  had  al- 
ways refused  to  take  any  part  in  them,  had  widened 
the  breach  which,  without  that,  parted  her  from  her 
husband.  Phoebicius  was,  in  his  fashion,  very  much 
in  earnest  with  all  these  things ;  for  they  alone 
saved  him  in  some  measure ;  from  himself,  from 
dark  memories,  and  from  the  fear  of  meeting  the  re- 
ward of  his  evil  deeds  in  a  future  life,  while  Sirona 
found  her  best  comfort  in  the  remembrance  of  her 
early  life,  and  so  gathered  courage  to  endure  the 
miserable  present  cheerfully,  and  to  hold  fast  to  hope 
for  better  times. 

Phcebicius  ended  his  prayer  to-day — a  prayer  for 
strength  to  break  his  wife's  strong  spirit,  for  a  suc- 
cessful issue  to  his  revenge  on  her  seducer — ended  it 
without  haste,  and  with  careful  observance  of  all  the 
prescribed  forms.  Then  he  took  two  strong  ropes 
from  the  wall,  pulled  himself  up,  straight  and  proud, 
as  if  he  were  about  to  exhort  his  soldiers  to  courage 
before  a  battle,  cleared  his  throat  like  an  orator 
in  the  Forum  before  he  begins  his  discourse,  and 
entered  the  bedroom  with  a  dignified  demeanor. 
Not  the  smallest  suspicion  of  the  possibility  of  her 
escape  troubled  his  sense  of  security,  when,  not  find- 
ing Sirona  in  the  sleeping-room,  he  went  into  the 
sitting-room  to  carry  out  the  meditated  punishment. 
Here  again — no  one. 

He  paused  in  astonishment ;  but  the  thought  that 


l68  HOMO   SUM. 

she  could  have  fled  appeared  to  him  so  insane,  that 
he  immediately  and  decisively  dismissed  it.  No 
doubt  she  feared  his  wrath,  and  was  hidden  under 
her  bed  or  behind  the  curtain  which  covered  his 
clothes.  "  The  dog,"  thought  he,  "  is  still  cower- 
ing by  her —  '  and  he  began  to  make  a  noise, 
half  whistling  and  half  hissing,  which  lambe  could 
not  bear,  and  which  always  provoked  her  to  bark 
angrily — but  in  vain.  All  was  still  in  the  va- 
cant room,  still  as  death.  He  was  now  seriously 
anxious ;  at  first  deliberately,  and  then  with  rapid 
haste,  he  threw  the  light  under  every  vessel,  into 
every  corner,  behind  every  cloth,  and  rummaged  in 
places  that  not  even  a  child — nay  hardly  a  fright- 
ened bird  could  have  availed  itself  of  for  conceal- 
ment. At  last  his  right  hand  fairly  dropped  the 
ropes,  and  his  left,  in  which  he  held  the  lamp,  began 
to  tremble.  He  found  the  shutters  of  the  sleeping- 
room  open,  where  Sirona  had  been  sitting  on  the 
seat  looking  at  the  moon,  before  Hernias  had  come 
upon  the  scene.  "  Then  she  is  not  here !  "  he  mut- 
tered, and  setting  the  lamp  on  the  little  table,  from 
which  he  had  just  now  flung  Polykarp's  glass,  he 
tore  open  the  door,  and  hurried  into  the  court-yard. 
That  she  could  have  swung  herself  out  into  the 
road,  and  have  set  out  in  the  night  for  the  open 
desert,  had  not  yet  entered  into  his  mind.  He  shook 
the  door  that  closed  in  the  homestead,  and  found  it 
locked  ;  the  watch-dogs  roused  themselves,  and  gave 
tono;ue,  when  Phoebicius  turned  to  Petrus'  house, 

O  ' 

and  began  to  knock  at  the  door  with  the  brazen 


HOMO  SUM.  169 

knocker,  at  first  softly  and  then  with  growing  anger ; 
he  considered  it  as  certain  that  his  wife  had  sought 
and  found  protection  under  the  Senator's  roof.  He 
could  have  shouted  Avith  rage  and  anguish,  and  yet 
he  hardly  thought  of  his  wife  and  the  danger  of 
losing  her,  but  only  of  Polykarp  and  the  disgrace  he 
had  wrought  him  and  the  reparation  he  would  exact 
from  him,  and  his  parents,  who  had  dared  to  tam- 
per with  his  household  rights — his,  the  Imperial 
centurion's. 

What  was  Sirona  to  him.  In  the  flush  of  an  hour 
of  excitement  he  had  linked  her  destiny  to  his. 

At  Arelas,  about  two  years  since,  one  of  his  com- 
rades had  joined  their  circle  of  boon-companions, 
and  had  related  that  he  had  been  the  witness  of  a 
remarkable  scene.  A  number  of  young  fellows  had 
surrounded  a  boy  and  had  unmercifully  beaten  him 
—he  himself  knew  not  wherefore.  The  little  one 
had  defended  himself  bravely,  but  was  at  last  over- 
come by  numbers.  "  Then  suddenly,"  continued 
the  soldier,  "  the  door  of  a  house  near  the  circus 
opened,  and  a  young  girl  with  long  golden  hair  flew 
out,  and  drove  the  boys  to  flight,  and  released  the 
victim,  her  brother,  from  his  tormentors.  She 
looked  like  a  Lioness,"  cried  the  narrator,  "  Sirona 
she  is  called,  and  of  all  the  pretty  girls  of  Arelas, 
she  is  beyond  a  doubt  the  prettiest."  This  opinion 
was  confirmed  on  all  sides,  and  Phcebicius,  who  at 
that  time  had  just  been  admitted  to  the  grade  of 
"Lion,"  among  the  worshippers  of  Mithras,  and 
liked  very  well  to  hear  himself  called  "  the  Lion," 


I7O  HOMO  SUM. 

exclaimed,  "  I  have  long  been  seeking  a  Lioness, 
and  here  it  seems  to  me  that  I  have  found  one. 
Phcebicius  and  Sirona — the  two  names  sound  very 
finely  together." 

On  the  following  day  he  asked  Sirona  of  her 
father  for  his  wife,  and  as  he  had  to  set  out  for 
Rome  in  a  few  days  the  wedding  was  promptly 
celebrated.  She  had  never  before  quitted  Arelas, 
and  knew  not  what  she  was  giving  up,  when  she 
took  leave  of  her  father's  house  perhaps  forever. 
In  Rome  Phcebicius  and  his  young  wife  met  again ; 
there  many  admired  the  beautiful  woman,  and  made 
every  effort  to  obtain  her  favor,  but  to  him  she 
was  only  a  lightly  won,  and  therefore  lightly  valued 
possession ;  nay,  ere  long  no  more  than  a  burden, 
ornamental  no  doubt  but  troublesome  to  guard. 
When  presently  his  handsome  wife  attracted  the 
notice  of  the  legate,  he  endeavored  to  gain  profit 
and  advancement  through  her,  but  Sirona  had  re- 
buffed Quintillus  with  such  insulting  disrespect,  that 
his  superior  officer  became  the  centurion's  enemy, 
and  contrived  to  procure  his  removal  to  the  oasis, 
which  was  tantamount  to  banishment. 

From  that  time  he  had  regarded  her  too  as  his 
enemy,  and  firmly  believed  that  she  designedly 
showed  herself  most  friendly  to  those  who  seemed 
most  obnoxious  to  him,  and  among  these  he  reck- 
oned Polykarp. 

Once  more  the  knocker  sounded  on  the  Senator's 
door ;  it  opened,  and  Petrus  himself  stood  before 
the  raging  Gaul,  a  lamp  in  his  hand. 


HOMO  SUM. 


CHAPTER  XL 

THE  unfortunate  Paulus  sat  on  a  stone  bench  in 
front  of  the  Senator's  door,  and  shivered ;  for,  as 
dawn  approached,  the  night-air  grew  cooler,  and  he 
was  accustomed  to  the  warmth  of  the  sheep-skin, 
which  he  had  now  given  to  Hermas.  In  his  hand 
he  held  the  key  of  the  church,  which  he  had  prom- 
ised the  door-keeper  to  deliver  to  Petrus  ;  but  all 
was  so  still  in  the  Senator's  house,  that  he  shrank 
from  rousing  the  sleepers. 

"  What  a  strange  night  this  has  been !  "  he  mut- 
tered to  himself,  as  he  drew  his  short  and  tattered 
tunic  closer  together.  "  Even  if  it  were  warmer, 
and  if,  instead  of  this  threadbare  rag,  I  had  a  sack 
of  feathers  to  wrap  myself  in,  still  I  should  feel  a 
cold  shiver  if  the  spirits  of  hell  that  wander  about 
here  were  to  meet  me  again.  Now  I  have  actually 
seen  one  with  my  own  eyes.  Demons  in  women's 
form  rush  up  the  mountain  out  of  the  oasis  to  tempt 
and  torture  us  in  our  sleep.  What  could  it  have 
been  that  the  goblin  in  a  white  robe  and  with  flow- 
ing hair  held  in  its  arms  ?  Very  likely  the  stone 
with  which  the  incubus  loads  our  breast  when  he 
torments  us.  The  other  one  seemed  to  fly,  but  I  did 
not  see  its  wings.  That  side-building  must  be  where 


1/2  HOMO   SUM. 

the  Gaul  lives  with  his  ungodly  wife,  who  has  en- 
snared my  poor  Hennas.  I  wonder  whether  she  is 
really  so  beautiful !  But  what  can  a  youth  who  has 
grown  up  among  rocks  and  caves  know  of  the  charms 
of  women.  He  would,  of  course,  think  the  first  who 
looked  kindly  at  him  the  most  enchanting  of  her 
sex.  Besides  she  is  fair,  and  therefore  a  rare  bird 
among  the  sun-burnt  bipeds  of  the  desert.  The  cen- 
turion surely  cannot  have  found  the  sheep-skin  or  all 
would  not  be  so  still  here ;  once  since  I  have  been 
here  an  ass  has  brayed,  once  a  camel  has  groaned, 
and  now  already  the  first  cock  is  crowing ;  but  not 
a  sound  have  I  heard  from  human  lips,  not  even  a 
snore  from  the  stout  Senator  or  his  buxom  wife 
Dorothea,  and  it  would  be  strange  indeed  if  they 
did  not  both  snore." 

He  rose,  went  up  to  the  window  of  Phoebicius, 
dwelling,  and  listened  at  the  half-open  shutters,  but 
all  was  still. 

An  hour  ago  Miriam  had  been  listening  under 
Sirona's  room ;  after  betraying  her  to  Phcebicius 
she  had  followed  him  at  a  distance,  and  had  slipped 
back  into  the  court-yard  through  the  stables ;  she 
felt  that  she  must  learn  what  was  happening  with- 
in, and  what  fate  had  befallen  Hermas  and  Sirona 
at  the  hands  of  the  infuriated  Gaul.  She  was  pre- 
pared for  anything,  and  the  thought  that  the  cen- 
turion might  have  killed  them  both  with  the  sword 
filled  her  with  bitter-sweet  satisfaction.  Then,  see- 
ing the  light  through  the  crack  between  the  partly 
open  wooden  shutters,  she  softly  pushed  them  farther 


HOMO   SUM.  1/3 

apart,  and,  resting  her  bare  feet  against  the  wall, 
she  raised  herself  to  look  in. 

She  saw  Sirona  sitting  up  upon  her  couch,  and 
opposite  to  her  the  Gaul  with  pale  distorted  features ; 
at  his  feet  lay  the  sheep-skin ;  in  his  right  hand  he 
held  the  lamp,  and  its  light  fell  on  the  paved  floor 
in  front  of  the  bed,  and  was  reflected  in  a  large  dark 
red  pool. 

"  That  is  blood,"  thought  she,  and  she  shuddered 
and  closed  her  eyes. 

When  she  reopened  them  she  saw  Sirona's  face 
with  crimson  cheeks,  turned  towards  her  husband ; 
she  was  unhurt — but  Hernias  ? 

"  That  is  his  blood !  "  she  thought  with  anguish, 
and  a  voice  seemed  to  scream  in  her  very  heart,  "  I, 
his  murderess,  have  shed  it." 

Her  hands  lost  their  hold  of  the  shutters,  her  feet 
touched  the  pavement  of  the  j^ard,  and,  driven  by 
her  bitter  anguish  of  soul,  she  fled  out  by  the  way 
she  had  come — out  into  the  open  and  up  to  the 
mountain.  She  felt  that  rather  would  she  defy  the 
prowling  panthers,  the  night-chill,  hunger  and  thirst, 
than  appear  again  before  Dame  Dorothea,  the  Sen- 
ator, and  Marthana  with  this  guilt  on  her  soul  ;  and 
the  flying  Miriam  was  one  of  the  goblin  forms  that 
had  terrified  Paulus. 

The  patient  anchorite  sat  down  again  on  the  stone 
seat.  "The  frost  is  really  cruel,"  thought  he, 
"  and  a  very  good  thing  is  such  a  woolly  sheep-skin  ; 
but  the  Saviour  endured  far  other  sufferings  than 
these,  and  for  what  did  I  quit  the  world  but  to  im- 


174  HOMO   SUM. 

itate  Him,  and  to  endure  to  the  end  here  that  I  may 
win  the  joys  of  the  other  world.  There,  where 
angels  soar,  man  will  need  no  wretched  ram's  fell, 
and  this  time  certainly  selfishness  has  been  far  from 
me,  for  I  really  and  truly  suffer  for  another — I  am 
freezing  for  Hernias,  and  to  spare  the  old  man  pain. 
I  would  it  were  even  colder !  Nay,  I  will  never, 
absolutely  never  again  lay  a  sheep-skin  over  my 
shoulders." 

Paulus  nodded  his  head  as  if  to  signify  assent  to 
his  own  resolve;  but  presently  he  looked  graver, 
for  again  it  seemed  to  him  that  he  was  walking  in 
a  wrong  path. 

"Aye!  Man  achieves  a  handful  of  good,  and 
forthwith  his  heart  swells  with  a  camel-load  of  pride. 
"What  though  my  teeth  are  chattering,  I  am  none 
the  less  a  most  miserable  creature.  How  it  tickled 
my  vanity,  in  spite  of  all  my  meditations  and 
scruples,  when  they  came  from  Raithu  and  offered 
me  the  office  of  elder ;  I  felt  more  triumphant  the 
first  time  1  won  with  the  quadriga,  but  1  was 
scarcely  more  puffed  up  with  pride  then,  than  I  was 
yesterday.  How  many  who  think  to  follow  the 
Lord  strive  only  to  be  exalted  as  He  is  ;  they  keep 
well  out  of  the  way  of  His  abasement.  Thou,  O 
Thou  Most  High,  art  my  witness  that  I  earnestly 
seek  it,  but  so  soon  as  the  thorns  tear  my  flesh  the 
drops  of  blood  turn  to  roses,  and  if  I  put  them  aside, 
others  come  and  still  fling  garlands  in  my  way.  I 
verily  believe  that  it  is  as  hard  here  on  earth  to  find 
pain  without  pleasure,  as  pleasure  without  pain," 


HOMO   SUM.  175 

While  thus  he  meditated  his  teeth  chattered  with 
cold,  but  suddenly  his  reflections  were  interrupted, 
for  the  dogs  set  up  a  loud  barking.  Phcebicius  was 
knocking  at  the  Senator's  door. 

Paulus  rose  at  once,  and  approached  the  gate- way. 
He  could  hear  every  word  that  was  spoken  in  the 
court-yard ;  the  deep  voice  was  the  Senator's,  the 
high  sharp  tones  must  be  the  centurion's. 

Phoebicius  •  was  demanding  his  wife  back  from 
Petrus,  as  she  had  hidden  in  his  house,  while  Petrus 
positively  declared  that  Sirona  had  not  crossed  his 
threshold  since  the  morning  of  the  previous  day. 

In  spite  of  the  vehement  and  indignant  tones  in 
which  his  lodger  spoke,  the  Senator  remained  per- 
fectly calm,  and  presently  went  away  to  ask  his 
wife  whether  she  by  chance,  while  he  was  asleep, 
had  opened  the  house  to  the  missing  woman. 
Paulus  heard  the  soldier's  steps  as  he  paced  up  and 
down  the  court-yard,  but  they  soon  ceased,  for 
Dame  Dorothea  appeared  at  the  door  with  her 
husband,  and  on  her  part  emphatically  declared 
that  she  knew  nothing  of  Sirona. 

"  Your  son  Poly karp  then,"  interrupted  Phoebicius, 
"  will  be  better  imformed  of  her  whereabouts." 

"  My  son  has  been  since  yesterday  at  Kai'thu  on 
business,"  said  Petrus  resolutely  but  evasively ;  "  we 
expect  him  home  to-day  only." 

"  It  would  seem  that  he  has  been  quick,  and  has 
returned  much  sooner,"  retorted  Phosbicius.  "  Our 
preparations  for  sacrificing  on  the  mountain  were 
no  secret,  and  the  absence  of  the  master  of  the  house 


176  HOMO  SUM. 

is  the  opportunity  for  thieves  to  break  in — above 
all,  for  lovers  who  throw  roses  into  their  ladies' 
windows.  You  Christians  boast  that  you  regard 
the  marriage  tie  as  sacred,  but  it  seems  to  me  that 
you  apply  the  rule  only  to  your  fellow-believers. 
Your  sons  may  make  free  to  take  their  pleasure 
among  the  wives  of  the  heathen ;  it  only  remains  to 
be  proved  whether  the  heathen  husbands  will  be 
trifled  with  or  not.  So  far  as  I  am  concerned,  I  am 
inclined  for  anything  rather  than  jesting.  I  would 
have  you  to  understand  that  I  will  never  let  Caesar's 
uniform,  wThich  I  wear,  be  stained  by  disgrace,  and 
that  I  am  minded  to  search  your  house,  and  if  I  find 
my  undutiful  wife  and  your  son  within  its  walls,  I 
will  carry  them  and  you  before  the  judge,  and  sue 
for  my  rights." 

"  You  will  seek  in  vain,"  replied  Petrus,  command- 
ing himself  with  difficulty.  "My  word  is  yea  or 
nay,  and  I  repeat  once  more  no,  we  harbor  neither 
her  nor  him.  As  for  Dorothea  and  myself — neither 
of  us  is  inclined  to  interfere  in  your  concerns,  but 
neither  will  we  permit  another — be  he  whom  he 
may — to  interfere  in  ours.  This  threshold  shall 
never  be  crossed  by  any  but  those  to  whom  I  grant 
permission,  or  by  the  Emperor's  judge,  to  whom  I 
must  yield.  You,  I  forbid  to  enter.  Sirona  is  not 
here,  and  you  would  do  better  to  seek  her  elsewhere 
than  to  fritter  away  your  time  here." 

<;  I  do  not  require  your  advice !  "  cried  the  cen- 
turion wrathfully. 

"  And  I,"  retorted  Petrus,  "  do  not  feel  myself 


HOMO   SUM.  177 

called  upon  to  arrange  your  matrimonial  difficulties. 
Besides  you  can  get  back  Sirona  without  our  help, 
for  it  is  always  more  difficult  to  keep  a  wife  safe  in 
the  house,  than  to  fetch  her  back  when  she  has  run 
away." 

"  You  shall  learn  whom  you  have  to  deal  with  !  " 
threatened  the  centurion,  and  he  threw  a  glance 
round  at  the  slaves,  who  had  collected  in  the  court, 
and  who  had  been  joined  by  the  Senator's  eldest 
son.  "  I  shall  call  my  people  together  at  once,  and 
if  you  have  the  seducer  among  you  we  will  intercept 
his  escape." 

"  Only  wait  an  hour,"  said  Dorothea,  now  taking 
up  the  word,  while  she  gently  touched  her  husband's 
hand,  for  his  self-control  was  almost  exhausted, 
"  and  you  will  see  Polykarp  ride  home  on  his  father's 
horse.  Is  it  only  from  the  roses  that  my  son  threw 
into  your  wife's  window,  that  you  suppose  him  to 
be  her  seducer — she  plays  so  kindly  with  all  his 
brothers  and  sisters — or  are  there  other  reasons, 
which  move  you  to  insult  and  hurt  us  with  so  heavy 
an  accusation  ? " 

Often  when  wrathful  men  threaten  to  meet  with 
an  explosion,  like  black  thunder-clouds,  a  word 
from  the  mouth  of  a  sensible  woman  gives  them 
pause,  and  restrains  them  like  a  breath  of  soft 
wind. 

Phoebicius  had  no  mind  to  listen  to  any  speech 

from  Polykarp's  mother,  but  her  question  suggested 

to  him  for  the  first  time  a  rapid  retrospect  of  all 

that  had  occurred,  and  he  could  not  conceal  from 

12 


178  HOMO   SUM. 

himself  that  his  suspicions  rested  on  weak  grounds. 
And  at  the  same  time  he  now  said  to  himself,  that 
if  indeed  Sirona  had  fled  into  the  desert  instead  of 
to  the  Senator's  house  he  was  wasting  time,  and 
letting  the  start,  Avhich  she  had  already  gained,  in- 
crease in  a  fatal  degree. 

But  few  seconds  were  needed  for  these  reflections, 
and  as  he  was  accustomed  when  need  arose  to  con- 
trol himself,  he  said, 

"We  must  see — some  means  must  be  found — " 
and  then  without  any  greeting  to  his  host,  he  slowly 
returned  to  his  own  house.  But  he  had  not  reached 
the  door,  when  he  heard  hoofs  on  the  road,  and 
Petrus  called  after  him,  "Grant  us  a  few  minutes 
longer,  for  here  comes  Polykarp,  and  he  can  justify 
himself  to  you  in  his  own  person." 

The  centurion  paused,  the  Senator  signed  to  old 
Jethro  to  open  the  gate  ;  a  man  was  heard  to  spring 
from  his  saddle,  but  it  was  an  Amalekite — and  not 
Polykarp — who  came  into  the  court. 

"  What  news  do  you  bring  ?  "  asked  the  Senator, 
turning  half  to  the  messenger  and  half  to  the  cen- 
turion. 

"  My  lord  Polykarp,  your  son,"  replied  the  Ama- 
lekite— a  dark,  brown  man  of  ripe  years  with  supple 
limbs  and  a  sharp  tongue — "  sends  his  greetings  to 
you  and  to  the  mistress,  and  would  have  you  to  know 
that  before  midday  he  will  arrive  at  home  with  eight 
workmen,  whom  he  has  engaged  in  Ra'ithu.  Dame 
Dorothea  must  be  good  enough  to  make  ready  for 
them  all  and  to  prepare  a  meal." 


HOMO   SUM.  179 

"  "When  did  you  part  from  my  son  ? "  inquired 
Petrus. 

"  Two  hours  before  sundown." 

Petrus  heaved  a  sigh  of  relief,  for  he  had  not  till 
now  been  perfectly  convinced  of  his  son's  innocence  ; 
but,  far  from  triumphing  or  making  Phcebicius  feel 
the  injustice  he  had  done  him,  he  said  kindly — for 
he  felt  some  sympathy  with  the  Gaul  in  his  mis- 
fortune— 

"  I  wish  the  messenger  could  also  give  some  news 
of  your  wife's  retreat ;  she  found  it  hard  to  accommo- 
date herself  to  the  dull  life  here  in  the  oasis,  perhaps 
she  has  only  disappeared  in  order  to  seek  a  town 
which  may  offer  more  variety  to  such  a  beautiful 
young  creature  than  this  quiet  spot  in  the  desert." 

Phcebicius  waved  his  hand  with  a  negative  move- 
ment, implying  that  he  knew  better,  and  said, 

"  I  will  show  you  what  your  nice  night-bird  left 
in  my  nest.  It  may  be  that  you  can  tell  me  to  whom 
it  belongs." 

Just  as  he  hastily  stepped  across  the  courtyard  to 
his  own  dwelling  Paulus  entered  by  the  now  open 
gate ;  he  greeted  the  Senator  and  his  family,  and 
offered  Petrus  the  key  of  the  church. 

The  sun  meanwhile  had  risen,  and  the  Alexan- 
drian blushed  to  show  himself  in  Dame  Dorothea's 
presence  in  his  short  and  ragged  undergarment 
which  was  quite  inefficient  to  cover  the  still  athletic 
mould  of  his  limbs.  Petrus  had  heard  nothing  but 
good  of  Paulus,  and  yet  he  measured  him  now  with 
no  friendly  eye,  for  all  that  wore  the  aspect  of  ex- 


ISO  HOMO  SUM. 

travagance  repelled  his  temperate  and  methodical 
nature.  Paulus  was  made  conscious  of  whtit  was 
passing  in  the  Senator's  mind  when,  without  vouch- 
safing a  single  word  he  took  the  key  from  his  hand. 
It  was  not  a  matter  of  indifference  to  him,  that 
this  man  should  think  ill  of  him,  and  he  said,  with 
some  embarrassment — 

"  We  do  not  usually  go  among  people  without  a 
sheepskin,  but  I  have  lost  mine." 

Hardly  had  he  uttered  the  words,  when  Phoebicius 
came  back  with  Hennas'  sheep-skin  in  his  hand  and 
cried  out  to  Petrus, 

"  This  I  found  on  my  return  home,  in  our  sleeping- 
room." 

"  And  when  have  you  ever  seen  Polykarp  in  such 
a  mantle  ? "  asked  Dorothea. 

"  When  the  gods  visit  the  daughters  of  men,"  re- 
plied the  centurion,  "  they  have  always  made  choice 
of  strange  disguises.  Why  should  not  a  perfumed 
Alexandrian  gentleman  transform  himself  for  once 
into  one  of  those  rough  fools  on  the  mountain  ?  How- 
ever, even  old  Homer  sometimes  nodded — and  I  con- 
fess that  I  was  in  error  with  regard  to  your  son.  I 
meant  no  offence,  Senator!  You  have  lived  here 
longer  than  I ;  who  can  have  made  me  a  present  of 
this  skin,  which  still  seems  to  be  pretty  new — horns 
and  all." 

Petrus  examined  and  felt  the  skin.  "  This  is  an 
anchorite's  garment,"  he  said ;  "  the  penitents  on  the 
mountain  are  all  accustomed  to  wear  such." 

"  Jt  is  one  of  those  rascals  then  that  has  found  his 


HOMO  SUM.  l8l 

way  into  my  house  ! "  exclaimed  the  centurion.  "  I 
bear  Caesar's  commission,  and  I  am  to  exterminate  all 
vagabonds  that  trouble  the  dwellers  in  the  oasis,  or 
travellers  in  the  desert.  Thus  run  the  orders  which 
I  brought  with  me  from  Kome.  I  will  drive  the  low 
fellows  together  like  deer  for  hunting,  for  they  are 
all  rogues  and  villains,  and  I  shall  know  how  to  tor- 
ture them  until  I  find  the  right  one." 

"  The  Emperor  will  ill-requite  you  for  that,"  re- 
plied Petrus.  "  They  are  pious  Christians,  and  you 
know  that  Constantino  himself— 

"  Constantino  !  "  exclaimed  the  centurion  scorn- 
fully. "  Perhaps  he  will  let  himself  be  baptized,  for 
water  can  hurt  no  one,  and  he  cannot,  like  the  great 
Diocletian,  exterminate  the  masses  who  run  after 
the  crucified  miracle-monger,  without  depopulating 
the  country.  Look  at  these  coins  ;  here  is  the  image 
of  Caesar,  and  what  is  this  on  the  other  side  ?  Is 
this  your  Nazarene,  or  is  it  the  old  god,  the  immor- 
tal and  invincible  sun  ?  And  is  that  man  one  of  your 
creed,  who  in  Constantinople  adores  Tyche  and  the 
Dioscuri  Castor  and  Pollux  ?  The  water  he  is  bap- 
tized with  to-day  he  will  wipe  away  to-morrow,  and 
the  old  gods  will  be  his  defenders,  if  in  more  peaceful 
times  he  maintains  them  against  your  superstition." 

"  But  it  will  be  a  good  while  till  then,"  said  Petrus 
coolly.  "  For  the  present,  at  least,  Constantine  is 
the  protector  of  the  Christians.  I  advise  you  to  put 
your  affair  into  the  hands  of  Bishop  Agapitus." 

"  That  he  may  serve  me  up  a  dish  of  your  doctrine, 
which  is  bad  even  for  women,"  said 'the  centurion 


182  HOMO  SUM. 

laughing;  "  and  that  I  may  kiss  my  enemies'  feet? 
They  are  a  vile  rabble  up  there,  I  repeat  it,  and  they 
shall  be  treated  as  such  till  I  have  found  my  man.  I 
shall  begin  tho  hunt  this  very  day." 

"  And  this  very  day  you  may  end  it,  for  the  sheep- 
skin is  mine." 

It  was  Paulus  who  spoke  these  words  in  a  loud  and 
decided  tone  ;  all  eyes  were  at  once  turned  on  him 
and  on  the  centurion. 

Petrus  and  the  slaves  had  frequently  seen  the  an- 
chorite, but  never  without  a  sheep-skin  similar  to  that 
which  Phoebicius  held  in  his  hand.  The  anchorite's 
self-accusation  must  have  appeared  incredible,  and 
indeed  scarcely  possible,  to  all  who  knew  Paulus  and 
Sirona ;  and  nevertheless  no  one,  not  even  the  Sena- 
tor, doubted  it  for  an  instant.  Dame  Dorothea 
only  shook  her  head  incredulously,  and  though  she 
could  find  no  explanation  for  the  occurrence,  she  still 
could  not  but  say  to  herself,  that  this  man  did  not 
look  like  a  lover,  and  that  Sirona  would  hardly  have 
forgotten  her  duty  for  his  sake.  She  could  not  in- 
deed bring  herself  te  believe  in  Sirona's  guilt  at  all, 
for  she  was  heartily  well-disposed  towards  her ;  be- 
sides— though  it,  no  doubt,  was  not  right — her 
motherly  vanity  inclined  her  to  believe  that  if  the 
handsome  young  woman  had  indeed  sinned,  she 
would  have  preferred  her  fine  tall  Polykarp — whose 
roses  and  flaming  glances  she  blamed  in  all  sincerity 
— to  this  shaggy,  wild-looking  gray-beard. 

Quite  otherwise  thought  the  centurion.  He  was 
quite  ready  to  believe  in  the  anchorite's  confession, 


HOMO  SUM.  183 

for  the  more  unworthy  the  man  for  whom  Sirona  had 
broken  faith,  the  greater  seemed  her  guilt,  and  the 
more  unpardonable  her  levity ;  and  to  his  man's 
vanity  it  seemed  to  him  easier — particularly  in  tne 
presence  of  such  witnesses  as  Petrus  and  Dorothea— 
to  bear  the  fact  that  his  Avife  should  have  sought 
variety  and  pleasure  at  any  cost,  even  at  that  of  de- 
voting herself  to  a  ragged  beggar,  than  that  she 
should  have  given  her  affections  to  a  younger,  hand- 
somer, and  worthier  man  than  himself.  He  had 
sinned  much  against  her,  but  all  that  lay  like  feath- 
ers on  his  side  of  the  scales,  while  that  which  she 
had  done  weighed  down  hers  like  a  load  of  lead.  He 
began  to  feel  like  a  man  who,  in  wading  through  a 
bog,  has  gained  firm  ground  with  one  foot,  and  all 
these  feelings  gave  him  energy  to  walk  up  to  the 
anchorite  with  a  self-control,  of  which  he  was  not 
generally  master,  excepting  when  on  duty  at  the 
head  of  his  soldiers. 

He  approached  the  Alexandrian  with  an  assump- 
tion of  dignity  and  a  demeanor  which  testified  to 
his  formerly  having  taken  part  in  the  representations 
of  tragedies  in  the  theatres  of  great  cities.  Paulus, 
on  his  part,  did  not  retreat  by  a  single  step,  but 
looked  at  him  with  a  smile  that  alarmed  Petrus  and 
the  rest  of  the  by-standers.  The  law  put  the  anchor- 
ite absolutely  into  the  power  of  the  outraged  husband, 
but  Phcebicius  did  not  seem  disposed  to  avail  him- 
self of  his  rights,  and  nothing  but  contempt  and 
loathing  were  perceptible  in  his  tone,  as  he  said  : 

"  A  man  who  takes  hold  of  a  mangy  dog  in  order 


184  HOMO   SUM. 

to  punish  him,  only  dirties  his  hand.  The  woman 
who  betrayed  me  for  your  sake,  and  you — you  dirty 
beggar — are  worthy  of  each  other.  I  could  crush 
you  like  a  fly  that  can  be  destroyed  by  a  blow  of  my 
hand  if  I  chose,  but  my  sword  is  Cassar's,  and  shall 
never  be  soiled  by  such  foul  blood  as  yours ;  how- 
ever the  beast  shall  not  have  cast  off  his  skin  for 
nothing,  it  is  thick,  and  so  you  have  only  spared  me 
the  trouble  of  tearing  it  off  you  before  giving  you 
your  due.  You  shall  find  no  lack  of  blows.  Confess 
where  your  sweetheart  has  fled  to  and  they  shall  be 
few,  but  if  you  are  slow  to  answer  they  will  be 
many.  Lend  me  that  thing  there,  fellow ! " 

"With  these  words  he  took  a  whip  of  hippopotamus 
hide  out  of  a  camel-driver's  hand,  went  close  up  to 
the  Alexandrian,  and  asked  :  "  Where  is  Sirona  ? " 

"  Nay,  you  may  beat  me,"  said  Paulus.  "  However 
hard  your  whip  may  fall  on  me,  it  cannot  be  heavy 
enough  for  my  sins ;  but  as  to  where  your  wife  is 
hiding,  that  I  really  cannot  tell  you — not  even  if  you 
were  to  tear  my  limbs  with  pincers  instead  of  strok- 
ing me  with  that  wretched  thing." 

There  was  something  so  genuinely  honest  in 
Paulus'  voice  and  tone,  that  the  centurion  was  in- 
clined to  believe  him ;  but  it  was  not  his  way  to  let 
a  threatened  punishment  fail  of  execution,  and  this 
strange  beggar  should  learn  by  experience  that  when 
his  hand  intended  to  hit  hard,  it  was  far  from 
"  stroking."  And  Paulus  did  experience  it,  without 
uttering  a  cry,  and  without  stirring  from  the  spot 
where  he  stood. 


HOMO  SUM,  185 

When  at  last  Phoebicius  dropped  his  weary  arm 
and  breathlessly  repeated  his  question,  the  ill-used 
man  replied, 

"  I  told  you  before  I  do  not  know,  and  therefore  I 
cannot  reveal  it." 

Up  to  this  moment  Petrus,  though  he  had  felt 
strongly  impelled  to  rush  to  the  rescue  of  his  severe- 
ly handled  fellow-believer,  had  nevertheless  allowed 
the  injured  husband  to  have  his  way,  for  he  seemed 
disposed  to  act  with  unusual  mildness,  and  the  Alex- 
andrian to  be  worthy  of  all  punishment ;  but  at  this 
point  Dorothea's  request  would  not  have  been  needed 
to  prompt  him  to  interfere. 

He  went  up  to  the  centurion,  and  said  to  him  in 
an  undertone, 

"  You  have  given  the  evil-doer  his  due,  and  if  you 
desire  that  he  should  undergo  a  severer  punishment 
than  you  can  inflict,  carry  the  matter — I  say  once 
more — before  the  bishop.  You  will  gain  nothing 
more  here.  Take  my  word  for  it,  I  know  the  man 
and  his  fellow-men  ;  he  actually  knows  nothing  of 
where  your  wife  is  hiding,  and  you  are  only  wasting 
the  time  and  strength  which  you  would  do  better  to 
save,  in  order  to  search  for  Sirona.  I  fancy  she  will 
have  tried  to  reach  the  sea,  and  to  get  to  Egypt  or 
possibly  to  Alexandria ;  and  there — you  know  what 
the  Greek  city  is — she  will  fall  into  utter  ruin." 

"And  so,"  laughed  the  Gaul,  "find  what  she 
seeks — variety,  and  every  kind  of  pleasure.  For  a 
young  thing  like  that,  who  loves  amusement,  there 
is  no  pleasant  occupation  but  vice.  But  I  will  spoil 


l86  HOMO  SUM. 

her  game ;  you  are  right,  it  is  not  well  to  give  her 
too  long  a  start.  If  she  has  found  the  road  to  the 
sea,  she  may  already — Hey,  here  Talib ! "  He 
beckoned  to  Polykarp's  Amalekite  messenger. 
"  You  have  just  come  from  Rai'thu ;  did  you  meet 
a  flying  woman  on  the  way,  with  yellow  hair  and 
a  white  face  ? " 

The  Amalekite,  a  free  man  with  sharp  eyes,  who 
was  highly  esteemed  in  the  Senator's  house,  and 
even  by  Phcebicius  himself,  as  a  trustworthy  and 
steady  man,  had  expected  this  question,  and  eagerly 
replied, 

"  At  two  stadia  beyond  el  Heswe  I  met  a  large 
caravan  from  Petra,  which  rested  yesterday  in  the 
oasis  here ;  a  woman,  such  as  you  describe,  was  run- 
ning with  it.  When  I  heard  what  had  happened 
here  I  wanted  to  speak,  but  who  listens  to  a  cricket 
while  it  thunders  ? " 

''Had  she  a  lame  greyhound  with  her?"  asked 
Phcebicius,  full  of  expectation. 

"  She  carried  something  in  her  arms,"  answered 
the  Amalekite.  "  In  the  moonlight  I  took  it  for  a 
baby.  My  brother,  who  was  escorting  the  caravan, 
told  me  the  lady  was  no  doubt  running  away,  for 
she  had  paid  the  charge  for  the  escort  not  in  ready 
money,  but  with  a  gold  signet-ring." 

The  Gaul  remembered  a  certain  gold  ring  with  a 
finely  carved  onyx,  which  long  years  ago  he  had  taken 
from  Glycera's  finger,  for  she  had  another  one  like 
it,  and  which  he  had  given  to  Sirona  on  the  day  of 
their  marriage. 


HOMO  SUM.  187 

"  It  is  strange ! "  thought  he,  "  what  we  give  to 
women  to  bind  them  to  us  they  use  as  weapons  to 
turn  against  us,  be  it  to  please  some  other  man,  or 
to  smooth  the  path  by  which  they  escape  from  us. 
It  was  with  a  bracelet  of  Glycera's  that  I  paid  the 
captain  of  the  ship  that  brought  us  to  Alexandria ; 
but  the  soft-hearted  fool,  whose  dove  flew  after  me, 
and  I  are  men  of  a  different  stamp ;  I  will  follow 
my  flown  bird,  and  catcji  it  again." 

He  spoke  the  last  words  aloud,  and  then  desired 
one  of  the  Senator's  slaves  to  give  his  mule  a  good 
feed  and  drink,  for  his  own  groom,  and  the  superior 
decurion  who  during  his  absence  must  take  his  place, 
were  also  worshippers  of  Mithras,  and  had  not  yet 
returned  from  the  mountain. 

Phcebicius  did  not  doubt  that  the  woman  who  had 
joined  the  caravan — which  he  himself  had  seen 
yesterday — was  his  fugitive  wife,  and  he  knew  that 
his  delay  might  have  reduced  his  earnest  wish  to 
overtake  her  and  punish  her  to  the  remotest  proba- 
bility ;  but  he  was  a  Roman  soldier,  and  would  rather 
have  laid  violent  hands  on  himself  than  have  left  his 
post  without  a  deputy.  When  at  last  his  fellow- 
worshippers  came  from  their  sacrifice  and  worship  of 
the  rising  sun,  his  preparations  for  his  long  journey 
were  completed. 

Phcebicius  carefully  impressed  on  the  decurion  all 
he  had  to  do  during  his  absence,  and  how  he  was  to 
conduct  himself ;  then  he  delivered  the  key  of  his 
house  into  Petrus'  keeping  as  well  as  the  black  slave- 
woman,  who  wept  loudly  and  passionately  over  the 


1 88  HOMO   SUM. 

flight  of  her  mistress  ;  he  requested  the  Senator  to 
bring  the  anchorite's  misdeed  to  the  knowledge  of 
the  bishop,  and  then,  guided  by  the  Amalekite  Talib, 
who  rode  before  him  on  his  dromedary,  he  trotted 
hastily  away  in  pursuit  of  the  caravan,  so  as  to  reach 
the  sea,  if  possible,  before  its  embarkation. 

As  the  hoofs  of  the  mule  sounded  fainter  and 
fainter  in  the  distance,  Paulas  also  quitted  the  Sen- 
ator's court-yard  ;  Dorothea  pointed  after  him  as  he 
walked  towards  the  mountain .  "  In  truth,  husband," 
said  she,  "  this  has  been  a  strange  morning  ;  every- 
thing that  has  occurred  looks  as  clear  as  day,  and 
yet  I  cannot  understand  it  all.  My  heart  aches  when 
I  think  what  may  happen  to  the  wretched  Sirona  if 
her  enraged  husband  overtakes  her.  It  seems  to  me 
that  there  are  two  sorts  of  marriage  ;  one  was  insti- 
tuted by  the  most  loving  of  the  angels,  nay,  by  the 
All-merciful  Himself,  but  the  other — it  is  not  to  be 
thought  of !  How  can  those  two  live  together  for 
the  future  ?  And  that  under  our  roof !  Their  closed 
house  looks  to  me  as  though  ruined  and  burnt-out, 
and  we  have  already  seen  the  nettles  spring  up 
which  grow  everywhere  among  the  ruins  of  human 
dwellings." 


HOMO  SUM.  189 


CHAPTEK  XII. 

THE  path  of  every  star  is  fixed  and  limited,  every 
plant  bears  flowers  and  fruit  which  in  form  and 
color  exactly  resemble  their  kind,  and  in  all  the 
fundamental  characteristics  of  their  qualities  and 
dispositions,  of  their  instinctive  bent  and  external 
impulse,  all  animals  of  the  same  species  resemble 
each  other ;  thus,  the  hunter  who  knows  the  red- 
deer  in  his  father's  forest,  may  know  in  every  forest 
on  earth  how  the  stag  will  behave  in  any  given  case. 
The  better  a  genus  is  fitted  for  variability  in  the 
conformation  of  its  individuals,  the  higher  is  the 
rank  it  is  entitled  to  hold  in  the  graduated  series  of 
creatures  capable  of  development ;  and  it  is  precisely 
that  wonderful  many-sidedness  of  his  inner  life,  and 
of  its  outward  manifestation,  which  assigns  to  man 
his  superiority  over  all  other  animated  beings. 

Some  few  of  our  qualities  and  activities  can  be 
fitly  symbolized  in  allegorical  fashion  by  animals ; 
thus,  courage  finds  an  emblem  in  the  lion,  gentle- 
ness in  the  dove,  but  the  perfect  human  form  has 
satisfied  a  thousand  generations,  and  will  satisfy  a 
thousand  more,  when  we  desire  to  reduce  the  divin- 
ity to  a  sensible  image,  for,  in  truth,  our  heart  is  as 
surely  capable  of  comprehending  "  God  in  us,"— r 


IpO  HOMO    SUM. 

that  is  in  our  feelings — as  our  intellect  is  capable  of 
comprehending  His  outward  manifestation  in  the 
universe. 

Every  characteristic  of  every  finite  being  is  to  be 
found  again  in  man,  and  no  characteristic  that  we 
can  attribute  to  the  Most  High  is  foreign  to  our  own 
soul,  which,  in  like  manner,  is  infinite  and  immeas- 
urable, for  it  can  extend  its  investigating  feelers 
to  the  very  utmost  boundary  of  space  and  time. 
Hence,  the  roads  which  are  open  to  the  soul,  are 
numberless  as  those  of  the  divinity.  Often  they 
seem  strange,  but  the  initiated  very  well  know  that 
these  roads  are  in  accordance  to  fixed  laws,  and  that 
even  the  most  exceptional  emotions  of  the  soul  may 
be  traced  back  to  causes  which  were  capable  of 
giving  rise  to  them  and  to  no  others. 

Blows  hurt,  disgrace  is  a  burden,  and  unjust  pun- 
ishment embitters  the  heart,  but  Paulus'  soul  had 
sought  and  found  a  way  to  which  these  simple  prop- 
ositions did  not  apply. 

He  had  been  ill-used  and  contemned,  and,  though 
perfectly  innocent,  ere  he  left  the  oasis  he  was  con- 
demned to  the  severest  penance.  As  soon  as  the 
bishop  had  heard  from  Petrus  of  all  that  had  hap- 
pened in  his  house,  he  had  sent  for  Paulus,  and  as 
he  could  answer  nothing  to  the  accusation,  he  had 
expelled  him  from  his  flock — to  which  the  anchor- 
ites belonged — forbidden  him  to  visit  the  church  on 
week-days,  and  declared  that  this  his  sentence  should 
be  publicly  proclaimed  before  the  assembled  con- 
gregation of  the  believers, 


HOMO  SUM.  191 

And  how  did  this  affect  Paulus  as  he  climbed  the 
mountain,  lonely  and  proscribed  ? 

A  fisherman  from  the  little  sea-port  of  Pharan, 
who  met  him  half-way  and  exchanged  a  greeting 
with  him,  thought  to  himself  as  he  looked  after 
him,  "  The  great  gray-beard  looks  as  happy  as  if  he 
had  found  a  treasure."  Then  he  walked  on  into  the 
valley  with  his  scaly  wares,  reminded,  as  he  went, 
of  his  son's  expression  of  face  when  his  wife  bore 
him  his  first  little  one. 

Near  the  watch-tower  at  the  edge  of  the  defile,  a 
party  of  anchorites  were  piling  some  stones  together. 
They  had  already  heard  of  the  bishop's  sentence  on 
Paulus,  the  sinner,  and  they  gave  him  no  greeting. 
He  observed  it  and  was  silent,  but  when  they  could 
no  longer  see  him  he  laughed  to  himself  and  mut- 
tered, while  he  rubbed  a  weal  that  the  centurion's 
whip  had  left  upon  his  back,  "  If  they  think  that  a 
Gaul's  cudgel  has  a  pleasant  flavor  they  are  mis- 
taken, however  I  would  not  exchange  it  for  a  skin 
of  Anthyllan  wine  ;  and  if  they  could  only  know 
that  at  least  one  of  the  stripes  which  torments  me 
is  due  to  each  one  of  themselves,  they  would  be  sur- 
prised !  But  away  with  pride  !  How  they  spat  on 
Thee,  Jesus  my  Lord,  and  who  am  I,  and  how  mildly 
have  they  dealt  with  me,  when  I  for  once  have  taken 
on  my  back  another's  stripes.  Not  a  drop  of 
blood  was  drawn !  I  wish  the  old  man  had  hit 
harder ! " 

He  walked  cheerfully  forward,  and  his  mind  re- 
curred to  the  Senator's  speech  that  "  he  could,,  if  he 


192  HOMO   SUM. 

list,  tread  him  down  like  a  worm,"  and  he  laughed 
again  softly,  for  he  was  quite  aware  that  he  was  ten 
times  as  strong  as  Phoebicius,  and  formerly  he  had 
overthrown  the  braggart  Arkesilaos  of  Kyrene  and 
his  cousin,  the  tall  Xenophanes,  both  at  once  in  the 
sand  of  the  Palaestra.  Then  he  thought  of  Hermas, 
of  his  sweet  dead  mother,  and  of  his  father,  and — 
which  was  the  most  comforting  thought  of  all — of 
how  he  had  spared  the  old  man  this  bitter  sorrow.1 

On  his  path  there  grew  a  little  plant  with  a  red- 
dish blossom.  In  years  he  had  never  looked  at  a 
flower  or,  at  any  rate,  had  never  wished  to  possess 
one  ;  to-day  he  stooped  down  over  the  blossom  that 
graced  the  rock,  meaning  to  pluck  it.  But  he  did 
not  carry  out  his  intention,  for  before  he  had  laid 
his  hand  upon  it,  he  reflected : 

"To  whom  could  I  offer  it?  And  perhaps  the 
flowers  themselves  rejoice  in  the  light,  and  in  the 
silent  life  that  is  in  their  roots.  How  tightly  it 
clings  to  the  rock.  Farther  away  from  the  road 
flowers  of  even  greater  beauty  blow,  seen  by  no 
mortal  eye  ;  they  deck  themselves  in  beauty  for  no 
one  but  for  their  Creator,  and  because  they  rejoice 
in  themselves.  I  too  will  withdraw  from  the  high- 
ways of  mankind ;  let  them  accuse  me  !  so  long  as  I 
live  at  peace  with  myself  and  my  God  I  ask  nothing 
of  any  one.  He  that  abases  himself — aye,  he  that 
abases  himself  ! — My  hour  too  shall  come,  and  above 
and  beyond  this  life  I  shall  see  them  all  once  more ; 
Petrus  and  Dorothea,  Agapitus  and  the  brethren 
who  now  refuse  to  receive  me,  and  then,  when  my 


HOMO   SUM.  193 

Saviour  Himself  beckons  me  to  Him,  they  will  see 
me  as  I  am,  and  hasten  to  me  and  greet  me  with 
double  kindness." 

He  looked  up,  proud  and  rejoicing  as  he  thought 
thus,  and  painted  to  himself  the  joys  of  Paradise,  to 
which  this  day  he  had  earned  an  assured  claim.  He 
never  took  longer  and  swifter  steps  than  when  his 
mind  was  occupied  with  such  meditations,  and  when 
he  reached  Stephanus'  cave  he  thought  the  way  from 
the  oasis  to  the  heights  had  been  shorter  than  usual. 

He  found  the  sick  man  in  great  anxiety,  for  he 
had  waited  until  now  for  his  son  in  vain,  and  feared 
that  Hernias  had  met  with  some  accident — or  had 
abandoned  him,  and  fled  out  into  the  world.  Paulus 
soothed  him  with  gentle  words,  and  told  him  of  the 
errand  on  which  he  had  sent  the  lad  to  the  farther 
coast  of  the  sea. 

"We  are  never  better  disposed  to  be  satisfied  with 
even  bad  news  than  when  we  have  expected  it  to  be 
much  worse  ;  so  Stephanus  listened  to  his  friend's  ex- 
planation quite  calmly,  and  with  signs  of  approval. 
He  could  no  longer  conceal  from  himself  that  Hennas 
was  not  ripe  for  the  life  of  an  anchorite,  and  since 
he  had  learned  that  his  unhappy  wife — whom  he  had 
given  up  for  lost — had  died  a  Christian,  he  found 
that  he  could  reconcile  his  thoughts  to  relinquishing 
the  boy  to  the  world.  He  had  devoted  himself  and 
his  son  to  a  life  of  penance,  hoping  and  striving  that 
so  Glycera's  soul  might  be  snatched  from  damnation, 
and  now  he  knew  that  she  herself  had  earned  her 
title  to  Heaven. 
'3 


194  HOMO   SUM. 

"  "When  will  he  come  home  again  ? "  he  asked 
Paulus. 

"  In  five  or  six  days,"  was  the  answer.  "  Ali,  the 
fisherman — out  of  whose  foot  I  took  a  thorn  some 
time  since-  -informed  me  secretly,  as  I  was  going  to 
church  yesterday,  that  the  Blemmyes  are  gathering 
behind  the  sulphur  mountains ;  when  they  have 
Avithdrawn  it  will  be  high  time  to  send  Hermas  to 
Alexandria.  My  brother  is  still  alive,  and  for  my 
sake  he  will  receive  him  as  a  blood-relation,  for  he 
too  has  been  baptized." 

"  He  may  attend  the  school  of  catechumens  in  the 
metropolis,  and  if  he — if  he — 

"  That  we  shall  see,"  interrupted  Paulus.  "  For 
the  present  it  comes  to  this,  we  must  let  him  go 
from  hence,  and  leave  him  to  seek  out  his  own  way. 
You  fancy  that  there  may  be  in  Heaven  a  place  of 
glory  for  such  as  have  never  been  overcome,  and  you 
would  fain  have  seen  Hermas  among  them.  It  re- 
minds me  of  the  physician  of  Corinth,  who  boasted 
that  he  was  cleverer  than  any  of  his  colleagues,  for 
that  not  one  of  his  patients  had  ever  died.  And  the 
man  was  right,  for  neither  man  nor  beast  had  ever 
trusted  to  his  healing  arts.  Let  Hermas  try  his 
young  strength,  and  even  if  he  be  no  priest,  but  a 
valiant  warrior  like  his  forefathers,  even  so  he  may 
honestly  serve  God.  But  it  will  be  a  long  time  be- 
fore all  this  comes  to  pass.  So  long  as  he  is  away  I 
will  attend  on  you — you  still  have  some  water  in 
your  jar  ? " 

"  It  has  twice  been  filled  for  me,"  said  the  old 


HOMO   SUM.  195 

man.  "  The  brown  shepherdess,  who  so  often 
waters  her  goats  at  our  spring,  came  to  me  the  first 
thing  in  the  morning  and  again  about  two  hours 
ago ;  she  asked  after  Hennas,  and  then  offered  of 
her  own  accord  to  fetch  water  for  me  so  long  as  he 
was  away.  She  is  as  timid  as  a  bird,  and  flew  off 
as  soon  as  she  had  set  down  the  jug." 

"  She  belongs  to  Petrus  and  cannot  leave  her  goats 
for  long,"  said  Paulus.  "  Now  I  will  go  and  find 
you  some  herbs  for  a  relish ;  there  will  be  no  more 
wine  in  the  first  place.  Look  me  in  the  face — for 
how  great  a  sinner  now  do  you  take  me  ?  Think 
the  very  worst  of  me,  and  yet  perhaps  you  will  hear 
worse  said  of  me.  But  here  come  two  men.  Stay  ! 
one  is  Hilarion,  one  of  the  bishop's  Acolytes,  and 
the  other  is  Pachomius  the  Memphite,  who  lately 
came  to  the  mountain.  They  are  coming  up  here, 
and  the  Egyptian  is  carrying  a  small  jar.  I  would 
it  might  hold  some  more  wine  to  keep  up  your 
strength." 

The  two  friends  had  not  long  to  remain  in  igno- 
rance of  their  visitors'  purpose.  So  soon  as  they 
reached  Stephanus'  cave,  both  turned  their  backs  on 
Paulus  with  conspicuously  marked  intention ;  nay 
the  Acolyte  signed  his  brow  with  the  cross,  as  if  he 
thought  it  necessary  to  protect  himself  against  evil 
influences. 

The  Alexandrian  understood ;  he  drew  back  and 
was  silent,  while  Hilarion  explained  to  the  sick  man 
that  Paulus  was  guilty  of  grave  sins,  and  that,  until 
he  had  done  full  penance,  he  must  remain  excluded 


196  HOMO   SUM. 

as  a  rotten  sheep  from  the  bishop's  flock,  as  well  as 
interdicted  from  waiting  on  a  pious  Christian. 

"  "We  know  from  Petrus,"  the  speaker  went  on, 
"  that  your  son,  father,  has  been  sent  across  the  sea, 
and  as  you  still  need  waiting  on,  Agapitus  sends 
you  by  me  his  blessing  and  this  strengthening 
wine  ;  this  youth  too  will  stay  by  you,  and  provide 
you  with  all  necessaries  until  Hernias  comes 
home." 

With  these  words  he  gave  the  wine-jar  to  the  old 
man,  who  looked  in  astonishment  from  him  to 
Paulus,  who  felt  indeed  cut  to  the  heart  when  the 
bishop's  messenger  turned  to  him  for  an  instant,  and 
with  the  cry,  "  Get  thee  out  from  among  us  ! "  dis- 
appeared. 

How  many  kindly  ties,  how  many  services  will- 
ingly rendered  and  aifectionately  accepted  were 
swept  away  by  these  words — but  Paulus  obeyed  at 
once.  He  went  up  to  his  sick  friend,  their  eyes 
met  and  each  could  see  that  the  eyes  of  the  other 
were  dimmed  with  tears. 

"  Paulus !  "  cried  the  old  man,  stretching  out  both 
his  hands  to  his  departing  friend,  whom  he  felt  he 
could  forgive  whatever  his  guilt;  but  the  Alexan- 
drian did  not  take  them,  but  turned  away,  and, 
without  looking  back,  hastily  went  up  the  mount- 
ain to  a  pathless  spot,  and  then  on  towards  the 
valley — onwards  and  still  onwards,  till  he  was 
brought  to  a  pause  by  the  steep  declivity  of  the 
hollow  way  which  led  southwards  from  the  mount- 
ains into  the  oasis. 


HOMO  SUM.  197 

The  sun  stood  high  and  it  was  burning  hot. 
Streaming  with  sweat  and  panting  for  breath  he 
leaned  against  the  glowing  porphyry  wall  behind 
him,  hid  his  face  in  his  hands  and  strove  to  collect 
himself,  to  think,  to  pray — for  a  long  time  in  vain ; 
for  instead  of  joy  in  the  suffering  which  he  had 
taken  upon  himself,  the  grief  of  isolation  weighed 
upon  his  heart,  and  the  lamentable  cry  of  the  old 
man  had  left  a  warning  echo  in  his  soul,  and  roused 
doubts  of  the  righteousness  of  a  deed,  by  which  even 
the  best  and  purest  had  been  deceived,  and  led  into 
injustice  towards  him.  His  heart  was  breaking  with 
anguish  and  grief,  but  when  at  last  he  returned  to 
the  consciousness  of  his  sufferings  physical  and 
mental,  he  began  to  recover  his  courage,  and  even 
smiled  as  he  murmured  to  himself, 

"  It  is  well,  it  is  well — the  more  I  suffer  the  more 
surely  shall  I  find  grace.  And  besides,  if  the  old 
man  had  seen  Hermas  go  through  what  I  have  ex- 
perienced it  would  undoubtedly  have  killed  him. 
Certainly  I  wish  it  could  have  been  done  without — 
without — aye,  it  is  even  so — without  deceit  ;  even 
when  I  was  a  heathen  I  was  truthful  and  held  a  lie, 
whether  in  myself  or  in  another,  in  as  deep  horror 
as  father  Abraham  held  murder,  and  yet  when  the 
Lord  required  him,  he  led  his  son  Isaac  to  the  slaugh- 
ter. And  Moses  when  he  beat  the  overseer — and 
Elias,  and  Deborah,  and  Judith.  I  have  taken  upon 
myself  no  less  than  they,  but  my  lie  will  surely  be 
forgiven  me,  if  it  is  not  reckoned  against  them  that 
they  shed  blood." 


198  HOMO   SUM. 

These  and  such  reflections  restored  Paulus  to 
equanimity  and  to  satisfaction  with  his  conduct,  and 
he  began  to  consider,  Avhether  he  should  return  to 
his  old  cave  and  the  neighborhood  of  Stephanus,  or 
seek  for  a  new  abode.  He  decided  on  the  latter 
course  ;  but  first  he  must  find  fresh  water  and  some 
sort  of  nourishment  ;  for  his  mouth  and  tongue  were 
quite  parched. 

Lower  down  in  the  valley  sprang  a  brooklet  of 
which  he  knew,  and  hard  by  it  grew  various  herbs 
and  roots,  with  which  he  had  often  allayed  his 
hunger.  He  followed  the  declivity  to  its  base,  then 
turning  to  the  left,  he  crossed  a  small  table-land, 
which  was  easily  accessible  from  the  gorge,  but 
which  on  the  side  of  the  oasis  formed  a  perpendicu- 
lar cliff  many  fathoms  deep.  Between  it  and  the 
main  mass  of  the  mountain  rose  numerous  single 
peaks,  like  a  camp  of  granite  tents,  or  a  Avildly  toss- 
ing sea  suddenly  turned  to  stone  ;  behind  these 
blocks  ran  the  streamlet,  which  he  found  after  a 
short  search. 

Perfectly  refreshed,  and  with  renewed  resolve  to 
bear  the  worst  with  patience,  he  returned  to  the 
plateau,  and  from  the  edge  of  the  precipice  he  gazed 
down  into  the  desert  gorge  that  stretched  away  far 
below  his  feet,  and  in  whose  deepest  and  remotest 
hollow  the  palm-groves  and  tamarisk-thickets  of  the 
oasis  showed  as  a  sharply  defined  mass  of  green,  like 
a  luxuriant  wreath  flung  upon  a  bier.  The  white- 
washed roofs  of  the  little  town  of  Pharan  shone 
brightly  among  the  branches  and  clumps  of  verdure, 


HOMO   SUM.  199 

and  above  them  all  rose  the  new  church,  which  he 
was  now  forbidden  to  enter.  For  a  moment  the 
thought  was  keenly  painful  that  he  was  excluded 
from  the  devotions  of  the  community,  from  the 
Lord's  supper  and  from  congregational  prayer,  but 
then  he  asked,  was  not  every  block  of  stone  on  the 
mountain  an  altar — was  not  the  blue  sky  above  a 
thousand  times  wider,  and  more  splendid  than  the 
mightiest  dome  raised  by  the  hand  of  man,  not  even 
excepting  the  vaulted  roof  of  the  Serapeum  at  Alex- 
andria, and  he  remembered  the  "  Amen  "  of  the  stones, 
that  had  rung  out  after  the  preaching  of  the  blind 
man.  By  this  time  he  had  quite  recovered  himself, 
and  he  went  towards  the  cliff  in  order  to  find  a  cav- 
ern that  he  knew  of,  and  that  was  empty — for  its 
gray-headed  inhabitant  had  died  some  weeks  since. 
"  Verily,"  thought  he, "  it  seems  to  me  that  I  am  by  no 
means  weighed  down  by  the  burden  of  my  disgrace, 
but,  "on  the  contrary,  lifted  up.  Here  at  least  I 
need  not  cast  down  my  eyes,  for  I  am  alone  with 
my  God,  and  in  His  presence  I  feel  I  need  not  be 
ashamed." 

Thus  meditating,  he  pressed  on  through  a  narrow 
space,  which  divided  two  huge  masses  of  porphyry, 
but  suddenly  he  stood  still,  for  he  heard  the  barking 
of  a  dog  in  his  immediate  neighborhood,  and  a  few 
minutes  after  a  greyhound  rushed  towards  him — now 
indignantly  flying  at  him,  and  now  timidly  retreat- 
ing— while  it  carefully  held  up  one  leg,  which  was 
wrapped  in  a  many-colored  bandage. 

Paulus  recollected  the  inquiry  which  Phcebicius 


200  HOMO   SUM. 

had  addressed  to  the  Amalekite  as  to  a  greyhound, 
and  he  immediately  guessed  that  the  Gaul's  runaway 
wife  must  be  not  far  off..  His  heart  beat  more 
quickly,  and  although  he  did  not  immediately  know 
how  he  should  meet  the  disloyal  wife,  he  felt  himself 
impelled  to  go  to  seek  her.  Without  delay  he  fol- 
lowed the  way  by  which  the  dog  had  come,  and  soon 
caught  sight  of  a  light  garment,  which  vanished 
behind  the  nearest  rock,  and  then  behind  a  farther, 
and  yet  a  farther  one. 

At  last  he  came  upon  the  fleeing  woman.  She 
was  standing  at  the  very  edge  of  a  precipice,  that 
rose  high  and  sheer  above  the  abyss — a  strange  and 
fearful  sight ;  her  long  golden  hair  had  got  tangled, 
and  waved  over  her  bosom  and  shoulders,  half 
plaited,  half  undone.  Only  one .  foot  was  firm  on 
the  ground  ;  the  other — with  its  thin  sandal  all  torn 
by  the  sharp  stones — was  stretched  out  over  the 
abyss,  ready  for  the  next  fatal  step.  At  the  next 
instant  she  might  disappear  over  the  cliff,  for  though 
with  her  right  hand  she  held  on  to  a  point  of  rock, 
Paulus  could  see  that  the  boulder  had  no  connection 
with  the  rock  on  which  she  stood,  and  rocked  to  and 
fro. 

She  hung  over  the  edge  of  the  chasm  like  a  sleep- 
walker, or  a  possessed  creature  pursued  by  demons, 
and  at  the  same  time  her  eyes  glistened  with  such 
wild  madness,  and  she  drew  her  breath  with  such 
feverish  rapidity  that  Paulus,  who  had  come  close  up 
to  her,  involuntarily  drew  back.  He  saw  that  her 
lips  moved,  and  though  he  could  not  understand 


HOMO   SUM.  201 

what  she  said,  he  felt  that  her  voiceless  utterance 
was  to  warn  him  back. 

What  should  he  do?  If  he  hurried  forward  to 
save  her  by  a  hasty  grip,  and  if  this  manoeuvre 
failed,  she  would  fling  herself  irredeemably  into  the 
abyss  :  if  he  left  her  to  herself,  the  stone  to  which 
she  clung  would  get  looser  and  looser,  and  as  soon  as 
it  fell  she  would  certainly  fall  too.  He  had  once 
heard  it  said,  that  sleep-walkers  always  threw  them- 
selves down  when  they  heard  their  names  spoken ; 
this  statement  now  occurred  to  his  mind,  and  he  for- 
bore from  calling  out  to  her. 

Once  more  the  unhappy  woman  waved  him  off ; 
his  very  heart  stopped  beating,  for  her  movements 
were  wild  and  vehement,  and  he  could  see  that  the 
stone  which  she  was  holding  on  by  shifted  its  place. 
He  understood  nothing  of  all  the  words  which  she 
tried  to  say — for  her  voice,  which  only  yesterday  had 
been  so  sweet,  to-day  was  inaudibly  hoarse — except 
the  one  name  "  Phoebicius,"  and  he  felt  no  doubt  that 
she  clung  to  the  stone  over  the  abyss,  so  that,  like 
the  mountain-goat  when  it  sees  itself  surprised  by 
the  hunter,  she  might  fling  herself  into  the  depth 
below  rather  than  be  taken  by  her  pursuer.  Paulus 
saw  in  her  neither  her  guilt  nor  her  beauty,  but  only 
a  child  of  man  trembling  on  the  brink  of  a  fearful 
danger  whom  he  must  save  from  death  at  any  cost ; 
and  the  thought  that  he  was  at  any  rate  not  a  spy 
sent  in  pursuit  of  her  by  her  husband,  suggested  to 
him  the  first  words  which  he  found  courage  to  ad- 
dress to  the  desperate  woman.  They  were  simple 


202  HOMO   SUM. 

words  enough,  but  they  were  spoken  in  a  tone  which 
fully  expressed  the  childlike  amiability  of  his  warm 
heart,  and  the  Alexandrian,  who  had  been  brought 
up  in  the  most  approved  school  of  the  city  of  orators, 
involuntarily  uttered  his  words  in  the  admirably 
rich  and  soft  chest  voice,  which  he  so  well  knew  how 
to  use. 

"  Be  thankful,"  said  he,  "  poor  dear  woman — I 
have  found  you  in  a  fortunate  hour.  I  am  Paulus, 
Hennas'  best  friend,  and  I  would  willingly  serve  you 
in  your  sore  need.  No  danger  is  now  threaten- 
ing you,  for  Phoebicius  is  seeking  you  on  a  wrong 
road  ;  you  may  trust  me.  Look  at  me  !  I  do  not 
look  as  if  I  could  betray  a  poor  erring  woman.  But 
you  are  standing  on  a  spot,  where  I  would  rather  see 
my  enemy  than  you ;  lay  your  hand  confidently  in 
mine — it  is  no  longer  white  and  slender,  but  it  is 
strong  and  honest — grant  me  this  request  and  you 
will  never  rue  it !  See,  place  your  foot  here,  and 
take  care  how  you  leave  go  of  the  rock  there.  You 
know  not  how  suspiciously  it  shook  its  head  over 
your  strange  confidence  in  it.  Take  care !  there — 
your  support  has  rolled  over  into  the  abyss ;  how  it 
crashes  and  splits.  It  has  reached  the  bottom, 
smashed  into  a  thousand  pieces,  and  I  am  thankful 
that  you  preferred  to  follow  me  rather  than  that  false 
support."  While  Paulus  was  speaking  he  had  gone 
up  to  Sirona,  as  a  girl  whose  bird  has  escaped  from 
its  cage,  and  who  creeps  up  to  it  with  timid  care  in 
the  hope  of  recapturing  it ;  he  offered  her  his  hand, 
and  as  soon  as  he  felt  hers  in  his  grasp,  he  had  care- 


HOMO   SUM.  203 

fully  rescued  her  from  her  fearful  position,  and  had 
led  her  down  to  a  secure  footing  on  the  plateau.  So 
long  as  she  followed  him  unresistingly  he  led  her  on 
towards  the  mountain — without  aim  or  destination 
but  away,  away  from  the  abyss. 

She  paused  by  a  square  block  of  diorite,  and  Paulus, 
who  had  not  failed  to  observe  how  heavy  her  steps 
were,  desired  her  to  sit  down ;  he  pushed  up  a  flag 
of  stone,  which  he  propped  with  smaller  ones,  so 
that  Sirona  might  not  lack  a  support  for  her  weary 
back.  When  he  had  accomplished  this,  Sirona 
leaned  back  against  the  stone,  and  something  of 
dawning  satisfaction  was  audible  in  the  soft  sigh, 
which  was  the  first  sound  that  had  escaped  her 
tightly  closed  lips  since  her  rescue.  Paulus  smiled 
at  her  encouragingly,  and  said,  "  Now  rest  a  little,  I 
see  what  you  want ;  one  cannot  defy  the  heat  of  the 
sun  for  a  whole  day  with  impunity." 

Sirona  nodded,  pointed  to  her  mouth,  and  im- 
plored wearily  and  very  softly  for  "  Water,  a  little 
water." 

Paulus  struck  his  hand  against  his  forehead, 
and  cried  eagerly,  "  Directly — I  will  bring  you  a 
fresh  draught.  In  a  few  minutes  I  will  be  back 
again." 

Sirona  looked  after  him  as  he  hastened  away. 
Her  gaze  became  more  and  more  staring  and  glazed, 
and  she  felt  as  if  the  rock,  on  which  she  was  sitting, 
were  changing  into  the  ship  which  had  brought  her 
from  Massilia  to  Ostia.  Every  heaving  motion  of 
the  vessel,  which  had  made  her  so  giddy  as  it  danced 


2O4  HOMO   SUM. 

over  the  shifting  waves,  she  now  distinctly  felt  again, 
and  at  last  it  seemed  as  if  a  whirlpool  had  seized 
the  ship,  and  was  whirling  it  round  faster  and  faster 
in  a  circle.  She  closed  her  eyes,  felt  vaguely  and  in 
vain  in  the  air  for  some  holdfast,  her  head  fell  power- 
less on  one  side,  and  before  her  cheek  sank  upon  her 
shoulders  she  uttered  one  feeble  cry  of  distress,  for 
she  felt  as  if  all  her  limbs  were  dropping  from  her 
body,  as  leaves  in  autumn  fall  from  the  boughs, 
and  she  fell  back  unconscious  on  the  stony  couch 
which  Paulus  had  constructed  for  her. 

It  was  the  first  swoon  that  Sirona,  with  her  sound 
physical  and  mental  powers,  had  ever  experienced  ; 
but  the  strongest  of  her  sex  would  have  been  over- 
come by  the  excitement,  the  efforts,  the  privations, 
and  the  sufferings  which  had  that  day  befallen  the 
unfortunate  fair  one. 

At  first  she  had  fled  without  any  plan  out  into 
the  night  and  up  the  mountain ;  the  moon  lighted 
her  on  her  way,  and  for  fully  an  hour  she  continued 
her  upward  road  without  any  rest.  Then  she  heard 
the  voices  of  travellers  who  were  coming  towards  her, 
and  she  left  the  beaten  road  and  tried  to  get  away 
from  them,  for  she  feared  that  her  greyhound, 
which  she  still  carried  on  her  arm,  would  betray  her 
by  barking,  or  if  they  heard  it  whining,  and  saw 
it  limp.  At  last  she  had  sunk  down  on  a  stone,  and 
had  reflected  on  all  the  events  of  the  last  few  hours, 
and  on  what  she  had  to  do  next.  She  could  look 
back  dreamily  on  the  past,  and  build  castles  in  the 
air  in  a  blue-skied  future — this  was  easy  enough ; 


HOMO    SUM.  205 

but  she  did  not  find  it  easy  to  reflect  with  due 
deliberation,  and  to  think  in  earnest.  Only  one 
thing  was  perfectly  clear  to  her :  she  would  rather 
starve  and  die  of  thirst,  and  shame,  and  misery — nay, 
she  would  rather  be  the  instrument  of  her  own  death, 
than  return  to  her  husband.  She  knew  that  she 
must  in  the  first  instance  expect  ill-usage,  scorn,  and 
imprisonment  in  a  dark  room  at  the  Gaul's  hands  ; 
but  all  that  seemed  to  her  far  more  endurable  than 
the  tenderness  with  which  he  from  time  to  time  ap- 
proached her.  When  she  thought  of  that,  she  shud- 
dered and  clenched  her  white  teeth,  and  doubled  her 
fist  so  tightly  that  her  nails  cut  the  flesh. 

But  what  was  she  to  do  ?  If  Hennas  were  to 
meet  her  ?  And  yet  what  help  could  she  look  from 
him,  for  what  was  he  but  a  mere  lad,  and  the  thought 
of  linking  her  life  to  his,  if  only  for  a  day,  appeared 
to  her  foolish  and  ridiculous. 

Certainly  she  felt  no  inclination  to  repent  or  to 
blame  herself ;  still  it  had  been  a  great  folly  on  her 
part  to  call  him  into  the  house  for  the  sake  of  amus- 
ing herself  with  him. 

Then  she  recollected  the  severe  punishment  she 
had  once  suffered,  because,  when  she  was  still  quite 
little,  and  without  meaning  any  harm,  she  had  taken 
her  father's  water  clock  to  pieces,  and  had  spoiled 
it. 

She  felt  that  she  was  very  superior  to  Hermas, 
and  her  position  was  now  too  grave  a  one  for  her  to 
feel  inclined  to  play  any  more.  She  thought  indeed 
of  Petrus  and  Dorothea,  but  she  could  only  reach 


206  HOMO   SUM. 

them  by  going  back  to  the  oasis,  and  then  she  feared 
to  be  discovered  by  Phoebicius. 

If  Polykarp  now  could  only  meet  her  on  his  way 
back  from  Rai'thu  ;  but  the  road  she  had  just  quitted 
did  not  lead  from  thence,  but  to  the  gate-way  that 
lay  more  to  the  southwards. 

The  Senator's  son  loved  her — of  that  she  was 
sure,  for  no  one  else  had  ever  looked  into  her  eyes 
with  such  deep  delight,  or  such  tender  affection ; 
and  he  was  no  inexperienced  boy,  but  a  right  earnest 
man,  whose  busy  and  useful  life  now  appeared  to 
her  in  a  quite  different  light  to  that  in  which  she 
had  seen  it  formerly.  How  willingly  now  would 
she  have  allowed  herself  to  be  supported  and  guided 
by  Polykarp  !  But  how  could  she  reach  him  ?  No 
— even  from  him  there  was  nothing  to  be  expected ; 
she  must  rely  upon  her  own  strength,  and  she  de- 
cided that  so  soon  as  the  morning  should  blush,  and 
the  sun  begin  to  mount  in  the  cloudless  sky,  she 
would  keep  herself  concealed  during  the  da}T,  among 
the  mountains,  and  then  as  evening  came  on,  she 
would  go  down  to  the  sea,  and  endeavor  to  get  on 
board  a  vessel  to  Klysma  and  thence  reach  Alex- 
andria. She  wore  a  ring  with  a  finely  cut  onyx  on 
her  finger,  elegant  ear-rings  in  her  ears,  and  on  her 
left  arm  a  bracelet.  These  jewels  were  of  virgin 
gold,  and  besides  these  she  had  with  her  a  few  silver 
coins  and  one  large  gold  piece,  that  her  father  had 
given  her  as  token  out  of  his  small  store,  when  she 
had  quitted  him  for  Rome,  and  that  she  had  hitherto 
preserved  as  carefully  as  if  it  were  a  talisman. 


HOMO   SUM.  207 

She  pressed  the  token,  which  was  sewn  into  a 
little  bag,  to  her  lips,  and  thought  of  her  paternal 
home,  and  her  brothers  and  sisters. 

Meanwhile  the  sun  mounted  higher  and  higher: 
she  wandered  from  rock  to  rock  in  search  of  a  shady 
spot  and  a  spring  of  water,  but  none  was  to  be  found, 
and  she  was  tormented  with  violent  thirst  and  ach- 
ing hunger.  By  midday  the  strips  of  shade  too  had 
vanished,  where  she  had  found  shelter  from  the  rays 
of  the  sun,  which  now  beat  down  unmercifully  on 
her  unprotected  head.  Her  forehead  and  neck  be- 
gan to  tingle  violently,  and  she  fled  before  the  burn- 
ing beams  like  a  soldier  before  the  shafts  of  his  pur- 
suer. Behind  the  rocks  which  hemmed  in  the 
plateau  on  which  Paulus  met  her,  at  last,  when  she 
was  quite  exhausted,  she  found  a  shady  resting-place. 
The  greyhound  lay  panting  in  her  lap,  and  held  up 
its  broken  paw,  which  she  had  carefully  bound  up 
in  the  morning  when  she  had  first  sat  down  to  rest, 
with  a  strip  of  stuff  that  she  had  torn  with  the  help 
of  her  teeth  from  her  under-garment.  She  now 
bound  it  up  afresh,  and  nursed  the  little  creature, 
caressing  it  like  an  infant.  The  dog  was  as  wretched 
and  suffering  as  herself,  and  besides  it  was  the  only 
being  that,  in  spite  of  her  helplessness,  she  could 
cherish  and  be  dear  to.  But  ere  long  she  lost  the 
power  even  to  speak  caressing  words  or  to  stir  a 
hand  to  stroke  the  dog.  It  slipped  off  her  lap  and 
limped  away,  while  she  sat  staring  blankly  before 
her,  and  at  last  forgot  her  sufferings  in  an  uneasy 
slumber,  till  she  was  roused  by  lambe's  barking  and 


208  HOMO   SUM. 

the  Alexandrian's  footstep.  Almost  half -dead,  her 
mouth  parched  and  her  brain  on  fire,  while  her 
thoughts  whirled  in  confusion,  she  believed  that 
Phoabicius  had  found  her  track,  and  was  come  to 
seize  her.  She  had  already  noted  the  deep  precipice 
to  the  edge  of  which  she  now  fled,  fully  resolved  to 
fling  herself  over  into  the  depths  below,  rather  than 
to  surrender  herself  prisoner. 

Paulus  had  rescued  her  from  the  fall,  but  now— 
as  he  came  up  to  her  with  two  pieces  of  stone  which 
were  slightly  hollowed,  so  that  he  had  been  able  to 
bring  some  fresh  water  in  them,  and  which  he  held 
level  with  great  difficulty,  walking  with  the  greatest 
care — he  thought  that  inexorable  death  had  only  too 
soon  returned  to  claim  the  victim  he  had  snatched 
from  him,  for  Sirona's  head  hung  down  upon  her 
breast,  her  face  was  sunk  towards  her  lap,  and  at  the 
back  of  her  head,  where  her  abundant  hair  parted 
into  two  flowing  tresses,  Paulus  observed  on  the 
snowy  neck  of  the  insensible  woman  a  red  spot 
which  the  sun  must  have  burnt  there. 

His  whole  soul  was  full  of  compassion  for  the 
young,  fair,  and  unhappy  creature,  and,  while  he 
took  hold  of  her  chin,  which  had  sunk  on  her  bosom, 
lifted  her  white  face,  and  moistened  her  forehead 
and  lips  with  water,  he  softly  prayed  for  her  salva- 
tion. 

The  shallow  cavity  of  the  stones  only  offered  room 
for  a  very  small  quantity  of  the  refreshing  moisture, 
and  so  he  was  obliged  to  return  several  times  to  the 
spring.  While  he  was  away  the  dog  remained  by 


HOMO   SUM.  209 

his  mistress,  and  would  now  lick  her  hand,  now  put 
his  sharp  little  nose  close  up  to  her  mouth,  and  ex- 
amine her  with  an  anxious  expression,  as  if  to  ascer- 
tain her  state  of  health. 

When  Paulus  had  gone  the  first  time  to  fetch  some 
water  for  Sirona  he  had  found  the  dog  by  the  side 
of  the  spring,  and  he  could  not  help  thinking,  "  The 
unreasoning  brute  has  found  the  water  without  a 
guide  while  his  mistress  is  dying  of  thirst.  Which 
is  the  wiser — the  man  or  the  brute  ? "  The  little 
dog  on  his  part  strove  to  merit  the  anchorite's  good 
feelings  towards  him,  for,  though  at  first  he  had 
barked  at  him,  he  now  was  very  friendly  to  him,  and 
looked  him  in  the  face  from  time  to  time  as  though 
to  ask,  "  Do  you  think  she  will  recover  ?  " 

Paulus  was  fond  of  animals,  and  understood  the 
little  dog's  language.  When  Sirona' s  lips  began  to 
move  and  to  recover  their  rosy  color,  he  stroked 
lambe's  smooth  sharp  head,  and  said,  as  he  held  a 
leaf  that  he  had  curled  up  to  hold  some  water  to 
Sirona's  lips,  "  Look,  little  fellow,  how  she  begins  to 
enjoy  it !  A  little  more  of  this,  and  again  a  little 
more.  She  smacks  her  lips  as  if  I  were  giving  her 
sweet  Falernian.  I  will  go  and  fill  the  stone  again ; 
you  stop  here  with  her,  I  shall  be  back  again  directly, 
but  before  I  return  she  will  have  opened  her  eyes  ; 
you  are  pleasanter  to  look  upon  than  a  shaggy  old 
gray-beard,  and  she  will  be  better  pleased  to  see 
you  than  me  when  she  awakes."  Paulus'  prognosis 
was  justified,  for  when  he  returned  to  Sirona  with 
a  fresh  supply  of  water  she  was  sitting  upright. 


210  HOMO   SUM. 

rubbed  her  open  eyes,  stretched  her  limbs,  clasped 
the  greyhound  in  both  arms,  and  burst  into  a  vio- 
lent flood  of  tears. 

The  Alexandrian  stood  aside  motionless,  so  as  not 
to  disturb  her,  thinking  to  himself, 

"  These  tears  will  wash  away  a  large  part  of  her 
suffering  from  her  soul." 

When  at  last  she  was  calmer,  and  began  to  dry 
her  eyes,  he  went  up  to  her,  offered  her  the  stone 
cup  of  water,  and  spoke  to  her  kindly.  She  drank 
with  eager  satisfaction,  and  ate  the  last  bit  of  bread 
that  he  "could  find  in  the  pocket  of  his  garment, 
soaking  it  in  the  water.  She  thanked  him  with  the 
childlike  sweetness  that  was  peculiar  to  her,  and 
then  tried  to  rise,  and  willingly  allowed  him  to  sup- 
port her.  She  was  still  very  weary,  and  her  head 
ached,  but  she  could  stand  and  walk. 

As  soon  as  Paulus  had  satisfied  himself  that  she 
had  no  symptoms  of  fever,  he  said,  "  Now,  for  to- 
day, you  want  nothing  more  but  a  warm  mess  of 
food,  and  a  bed  sheltered  from  the  night-chill ;  I  will 
provide  both.  You  sit  down  here;  the  rocks  are 
already  throwing  long  shadows,  and  before  the  sun 
disappears  behind  the  mountain  I  will  return. 
"While  I  am  away,  your  four-footed  animal  here  will 
while  away  the  time." 

He  hastened  down  to  the  spring  with  quick  steps ; 
close  to  it  was  the  abandoned  cave  which  he  had 
counted  on  inhabiting  instead  of  his  former  dwelling. 
He  found  it  after  a  short  search,  and  in  it,  to  his 
great  joy,  a  well  preserved  bed  of  dried  plants. 


HOMO   SUM.  211 

which  he  soon  shook  up  and  relaid,  a  hearth,  and 
wood  proper  for  producing  fire  by  friction,  a  water- 
jar,  and  in  a  cellar-like  hole,  whose  opening  was 
covered  with  stones  and  so  concealed  from  any  but 
a  practised  eye,  there  were  several  cakes  of  hard 
bread,  and  one  or  two  pots.  In  one  of  these  were 
some  good  dates,  in  another  gleamed  some  white 
meal,  a  third  was  half  full  of  sesame-oil,  and  a  fourth 
held  some  salt. 

"  How  lucky  it  is,"  muttered  the  anchorite,  as  he 
quitted  the  cave,  "  that  the  old  anchorite  was  such 
a  glutton." 

By  the  time  he  returned  to  Sirona,  the  sun  was 
going  down. 

There  was  something  in  the  nature  and  demean- 
or of  Paulus,  which  made  all  distrust  of  him  impos- 
sible, and  Sirona  was  ready  to  follow  him,  but  she 
felt  so  weak  that  she  could  scarcely  support  herself 
on  her  feet. 

"  I  feel,"  she  said,  "  as  if  I  were  a  little  child,  and 
must  begin  again  to  learn  to  walk." 

"  Then  let  me  be  your  nurse.  I  knew  a  Spartan 
dame  once,  who  had  a  beard  almost  as  rough  as 
mine.  Lean  confidently  on  me,  and  before  we  go 
down  the  slope,  we  will  go  up  and  down  the  level 
here  two  or  three  times."  She  took  his  arm,  and 
he  led  her  slowly  up  and  down. 

It  vividly  recalled  a  picture  of  the  days  of  his 
youth,  and  he  remembered  a  day  when  his  sister, 
who  was  recovering  from  a  severe  attack  of  fever, 
was  first  allowed  to  go  out  into  the  open  air.  She 


212  HOMO   SUM. 

had  gone  out,  clinging  to  his  arm,  into  the  peristyle 
of  his  father's  house ;  as  he  walked  backwards  and 
forwards  with  poor,  weary,  abandoned  Sirona,  his 
neglected  figure  seemed  by  degrees  to  assume  the 
noble  aspect  of  a  high-born  Greek  ;  and  instead  of 
the  rough,  rocky  soil,  he  felt  as  if  he  were  treading 
the  beautiful  mosaic  pavement  of  his  father's  court. 
Paulus  was  Menander  again,  and  if  there  was  little 
in  the  presence  of  there  cluse,  which  could  recall  his 
identity  with  the  old  man  he  had  trodden  down, 
the  despised  anchorite  felt,  while  the  expelled  and 
sinful  woman  leaned  on  his  arm,  the  same  proud 
sense  of  succoring  a  woman,  as  when  he  was  the 
most  distinguished  youth  of  a  metropolis,  and  when 
he  had  led  forward  the  master's  much  courted 
daughter  in  the  midst  of  a  shouting  troop  of  slaves. 

Sirona  had  to  remind  Paulus  that  night  was  com- 
ing on,  and  was  startled,  when  the  hermit  removed 
her  hand  from  his  arm  with  ungentle  haste,  and 
called  to  her  to  follow  him  with  a  roughness  that 
was  quite  new  to  him.  She  obeyed,  and  wherever 
it  was  necessary  to  climb  over  the  rocks,  he  sup- 
ported and  lifted  her,  but  he  only  spoke  when  she 
addressed  him. 

"When  they  had  reached  their  destination,  he 
showed  her  the  bed,  and  begged  her  to  keep  awake, 
till  he  should  have  prepared  a  dish  of  warm  food  for 
her,  and  he  shortly  brought  her  a  simple  supper,  and 
wished  her  a  good  night's  rest,  after  she  had  taken  it. 

Sirona  shared  the  bread  and  the  salted  meal-por- 
ridge with  her  dog,  and  then  lay  down  on  the  couch, 


HOMO  SUM.  213 

where  she  sank  at  once  into  a  deep,  dreamless  sleep, 
while  Paulus  passed  the  night  sitting  by  the  hearth. 
He  strove  to  banish  sleep  by  constant  prayer,  but 
fatigue  frequently  overcame  him,  and  he  could  not 
help  thinking  of  the  Gaulish  lady,  and  of  the  many 
things,  which  if  only  he  were  still  the  rich  Menan- 
der,  he  would  procure  in  Alexandria  for  her  and  for 
her  comfort.  Not  one  prayer  could  he  bring  to  its 
due  conclusion,  for  either  his  eyes  closed  before  he 
came  to  the  "  Amen,"  or  else  worldly  images  crowd- 
ed round  him,  and  forced  him  to  begin  his  devotions 
again  from  the  beginning,  when  he  had  succeeded  in 
recollecting  himself.  In  this  half -somnolent  state 
he  obtained  not  one  moment  of  inward  collectedness, 
of  quiet  reflection  ;  not  even  when  he  gazed  up  at 
the  starry  heavens,  or  looked  down  on  the  oasis, 
veiled  in  night,  where  many  others  like  himself  were 
deserted  by  sleep.  Which  of  the  citizens  could  it 
be  that  was  watching  by  that  light  which  he  saw 
glimmering  down  there  in  unwonted  brightness? — 
till  he  himself,  overpowered  by  fatigue,  fell  asleep. 


214  HOMO   SUM. 


CHAPTEK  XIII. 

THE  light  in  the  town,  which  had  attracted  Pau- 
lus,  was  in  Petrus'  house,  and  burnt  in  Polykarp's 
room,  which  formed  the  whole  of  a  small  upper 
story,  which  the  Senator  had  constructed  for  his  son 
over  the  northern  portion  of  the  spacious  flat  roof 
of  the  main  building. 

The  young  man  had  arrived  about  noon  with  the 
slaves  he  had  just  procured,  had  learned  all  that 
had  happened  in  his  absence,  and  had  silently  with- 
drawn into  his  own  room  after  supper  was  ended. 
Here  he  still  lingered  over  his  work. 

A  bed,  a  table  on  and  under  which  lay  a  multitude 
of  wax-tablets,  papyrus-rolls,  metal-points,  and  writ- 
ing-reeds, with  a  small  bench,  on  which  stood  a  water- 
jar  and  basin,  composed  the  furniture  of  this  room  ; 
on  its  whitewashed  Avails  hung  several  admirable 
carvings  in  relief,  and  figures  of  men  and  animals 
stood  near  them  in  long  rows.  In  one  corner,  near 
,  a  stone  water-jar,  lay  a  large,  damp-shining  mass  of 
clay. 

Three  lamps  fastened  to  stands  abundantly  lighted 
this  work-room,  but  chiefly  a  figure  standing  on 
a  high  trestle,  which  Polykarp's  fingers  were  in- 
dustriously moulding. 


HOMO   SUM.  215 

Phcebicius  had  called  the  young  sculptor  a  fop, 
and  not  altogether  unjustly,  for  he  loved  to  be  well 
dressed,  and  was  choice  as  to  the  cut  and  color  of 
his  simple  garments,  and  he  rarely  neglected  to 
arrange  his  abundant  hair  with  care,  and  to  anoint 
it  well ;  and  yet  it  was  almost  indifferent  to  him, 
whether  his  appearance  pleased  other  people  or  no, 
but  he  knew  nothing  nobler  than  the  human  form, 
and  an  instinct,  which  he  did  not  attempt  to  check, 
impelled  him  to  keep  his  own  person  as  nice  as  he 
liked  to  see  that  of  his  neighbor. 

Now,  at  this  hour  of  the  night,  he  wore  only  a 
shirt  of  white  woollen  stuff,  with  a  deep  red  border. 
His  locks,  usually  so  well-kept,  seemed  to  stand  out 
from  his  head  separately,  and  instead  of  smoothing 
and  confining  them,  he  added  to  their  wild  disorder, 
for,  as  he  worked,  he  frequently  passed  his  hand 
through  them  with  a  hasty  movement.  A  bat,  at- 
tracted by  the  bright  light,  flew  in  at  the  open  win- 
dow— which  was  screened  only  at  the  bottom  by  a 
dark  curtain — and  fluttered  round  the  ceiling  ;  but  he 
did  not  observe  it,  for  his  work  absorbed  his  whole 
soul  and  mind.  In  this  eager  and  passionate  occu- 
pation, in  which  every  nerve  and  vein  in  his  being 
seemed  to  bear  a  part,  no  cry  for  help  would  have 
struck  his  ear — even  a  flame  breaking  out  close  to  him 
would  not  have  caught  his  eye.  His  cheeks  glowed, 
a  fine  dew  of  glistening  sweat  covered  his  brow,  and 
his  very  gaze  seemed  to  become  more  and  more 
firmly  riveted  to  the  sculpture  as  it  took  form  under 
his  hand.  Now  and  again  he  stepped  back  from  it, 


2l6  HOMO  SUM. 

and  leaned  backwards  from  his  hips,  raising  his 
hands  to  the  level  of  his  temples,  as  if  to  narrow 
the  field  of  vision  ;  then  he  went  up  to  the  model, 
and  clutched  the  plastic  mass  of  clay,  as  though  it 
were  the  flesh  of  his  enemy. 

He  was  now  at  work  on  the  flowing  hair  of  the 
figure  before  him,  which  had  already  taken  the 
outline  of  a  female  head,  and  he  flung  the  bits  of 
clay,  which  he  removed  from  the  back  of  it  into  the 
ground,  as  violently  as  though  he  were  casting  them 
at  an  antagonist  at  his  feet.  Again  his  finger-tips 
and  modelling-tool  were  busy  with  the  mouth,  nose, 
cheeks,  and  eyes,  and  his  own  eyes  took  a  softer 
expression,  which  gradually  grew  to  be  a  gaze  of 
ecstatic  delight,  as  the  features  he  was  moulding  be- 
gan to  agree  more  and  more  with  the  image,  which  at 
this  time  excluded  every  other  from  his  imagination. 

At  last,  with  glowing  cheeks,  he  had  finished 
rounding  the  soft  form  of  the  shoulders,  and  drew 
back  once  more  to  contemplate  the  effect  of  the 
completed  work ;  a  cold  shiver  seized  him,  and  he 
felt  himself  impelled  to  lift  it  up,  and  dash  it  to  the 
ground  with  all  his  force.  But  he  soon  had  mastered 
this  stormy  excitement,  he  pushed  his  hand  through 
his  hair  again  and  again,  and  posted  himself,  with  a 
melancholy  smile  and  with  folded  hands,  in  front  of 
his  creation ;  sunk  deeper  and  deeper  in  his  con- 
templation of  it,  he  did  not  observe  that  the  door 
behind  him  was  opened,  although  the  flame  of  his 
lamps  flickered  in  the  draught,  and  that  his  mother 
had  entered  the  workroom,  and  by  no  means  en- 


HOMO  SUM. 

deavored  to  approach  him  unheard,  or  to  surprise 
him.  In  her  anxiety  for  her  darling,  who  had  gone 
through  so  many  bitter  experiences  during  the  past 
day,  she  had  not  been  able  to  sleep.  Polykarp's 
room  lay  above  her  bedroom,  and  when  his  steps 
overhead  betrayed  that,  though  it  was  now  near 
morning,  he  had  not  yet  gone  to  rest,  she  had  risen 
from  her  bed  without  waking  Petrus,  who  seemed  to 
be  sleeping.  She  obeyed  her  motherly  impulse  to  en- 
courage Polykarp  with  some  loving  words,  and  climb- 
ing up  the  narrow  stair  that  led  to  the  roof,  she  went 
into  his  room.  Surprised,  irresolute,  and  speechless 
she  stood  for  some  time  behind  the  young  man,  and 
she  looked  at  the  strongly  illuminated  and  beautiful 
features  of  the  newly  formed  bust,  which  was  only 
too  like  its  well-known  prototype.  At  last  she  laid 
her  hand  on  her  son's  shoulder,  and  spoke  his  name. 

Polykarp  stepped  back,  and  looked  at  his  mother 
in  bewilderment,  like  a  man  roused  from  sleep ;  but 
she  interrupted  the  stammering  speech  with  which 
he  tried  to  greet  her,  by  saying,  gravely  and  not 
without  severity,  as  she  pointed  to  the  statue, 

"  What  does  this  mean  ?  " 

"  What  should  it  mean,  mother  ?  "  answered  Poly, 
karp  in  a  low  tone,  and  shaking  his  head  sadly. 
"  Ask  me  no  more  at  present,  for  if  you  gave  me  no 
rest,  and  even  if  I  tried  to  explain  to  you  how  to- 
day— this  very  day — I  have  felt  impelled  and  driven 
to  make  this  woman's  image,  still  you  could  not  un- 
derstand me — no,  nor  any  one  else." 

"  God  forbid  that  I  should  ever  understand  it ! " 


2l8  HOMO   SUM. 

cried  Dorothea.  "  '  Thou  shalt  not  covet  thy  neigh- 
bor's wife,'  was  the  commandment  of  the  Lord  on 
this  mountain.  And  you  ?  You  think  I  could  not 
understand  you?  Who  should  understand  you  then, 
if  not  your  mother  ?  This  I  certainly  do  not  com- 
prehend, that  a  son  of  Petrus  and  of  mine  should 
have  thrown  all  the  teaching  and  the  example  of  his 
parents  so  utterly  to  the  wind.  But  what  you  are 
aiming  at  with  this  statue,  it  seems  to  me  is  not  hard 
to  guess.  As  the  forbidden  fruit  hangs  too  high  for 
you,  you  degrade  your  art,  and  make  to  yourself  an 
image  that  resembles  her  according  to  your  taste. 
Simply  and  plainly  it  comes  to  this ;  as  you  can  no 
longer  see  the  Gaul's  wife  in  her  own  person,  and 
yet  cannot  exist  without  the  sweet  presence  of  the 
fair  one,  you  make  a  portrait  of  clay  to  make  love 
to  and  you  will  carry  on  idolatry  before  it,  as  once 
the  Jews  did  before  the  golden  calf  and  the  brazen 
serpent." 

Polykarp  submitted  to  his  mother's  angry  blame  in 
silence,  but  in  painful  emotion.  Dorothea  had  never 
before  spoken  to  him  thus,  and  to  hear  such  words 
from  the  very  lips  which  were  used  to  address  him 
with  such  heart-felt  tenderness,  gave  him  unspeak- 
able pain.  Hitherto  she  had  always  been  inclined 
to  make  excuses  for  his  weaknesses  and  little  faults, 
nay,  the  zeal  with  which  she  had  observed  and  pointed 
out  his  merits  and  performances  before  strangers,  as 
well  as  before  their  own  family,  had  often  seemed 
to  him  embarrassing.  And  now  ?  She  had  indeed 
reason  to  blame  him,  for  Sirona  was  the  wife  of  an- 


HOMO  SUM.  219 

other,  she  had  never  even  noticed  his  admiration, 
and  now,  they  all  said,  had  committed  a  crime  for 
the  sake  of  a  stranger.  It  must  seem  both  a  mad 
and  a  sinful  thing  in  the  eyes  of  men  that  he  of 
all  others  should  sacrifice  the  best  he  had — his  Art — 
and  how  little  could  Dorothea,  who  usually  endea- 
vored to  understand  him,  comprehend  the  overpower- 
ing impulse  which  had  driven  him  to  this  task. 

He  loved  and  honored  his  mother  with  his  whole 
heart,  and  feeling  that  she  was  doing  herself  an  in- 
justice by  her  false  and  low  estimate  of  his  pro- 
ceedings, he  interrupted  her  eager  discourse,  raising 
his  hand,  imploringly  to  her. 

"  No,  mother,  no  ! "  he  exclaimed.  "  As  truly  as 
God  is  my  helper,  it  is  not  so.  It  is  true  that  I  have 
moulded  this  head,  but  not  to  keep  it,  and  to  commit 
the  sin  of  worshipping  it,  but  rather  to  free  myself 
from  the  image  that  stands  before  my  mind's  eye 
by  day  and  by  night,  in  the  city  and  in  the  desert, 
whose  beauty  distracts  my  mind  when  I  think,  and 
my  devotions  when  I  try  to  pray.  To  whom  is  it 
given  to  read  the  soul  of  man  ?  And  is  not  Sirona's 
form  and  face  the  loveliest  image  of  the  Most  High  ? 
So  to  represent  it,  that  the  whole  charm  that  her 
presence  exercises  over  me  might  also  be  felt  by  every 
beholder,  is  a  task  that  I  have  set  myself  ever 
since  her  arrival  in  our  house.  I  had  to  go  back  to 
the  capital,  and  the  work  I  longed  to  achieve  took 
a  clearer  form ;  at  every  hour  I  discovered  some- 
thing to  change  and  to  improve  in  the  pose  of  the 
head,  the  glance  of  the  eye  or  the  expression  of  the 


220  HOMO  SUM. 

mouth.  But  still  I  lacked  courage  to  put  the  work 
in  hand,  for  it  seemed  too  audacious  to  attempt 
to  give  reality  to  the  glorious  image  in  my  soul, 
by  the  aid  of  gray  clay  and  pale  cold  marble ;  to 
reproduce  it  so  that  the  perfect  work  should  delight 
the  eye  of  sense,  no  less  than  the  image  enshrined 
in  my  breast  delights  my  inward  eye.  At  the  same 
time  I  was  not  idle,  I  gained  the  prize  for  the  model 
of  the  lions,  and  if  I  have  succeeded  with  the  Good 
Shepherd  blessing  the  flock,  which  is  for  the  sarco- 
phagus of  Comes,  and  if  the  master  could  praise  the 
expression  of  devoted  tenderness  in  the  look  of  the 
Eedeemer,  I  know — nay,  do  not  interrupt  me, 
mother,  for  what  I  felt  was  a  pure  emotion  and  no 
sin — I  know  that  it  was  because  I  was  myself  so  full 
of  love,  that  I  was  enabled  to  inspire  the  very  stone 
with  love.  At  last  I  had  no  peace,  and  even  with- 
out my  father's  orders  I  must  have  returned  home ; 
then  I  saw  her  again,  and  found  her  even  more 
lovely  than  the  image  which  reigned  in  my  soul.  I 
heard  her  voice,  and  her  silvery  bell-like  laughter — 
and  then — and  then — .  You  know  very  well  what  I 
learned  yesterday.  The  unworthy  wife  of  an  un- 
worthy husband,  the  woman  Sirona,  is  gone  from 
me  forever,  and  I  was  striving  to  drive  her  image 
from  my  soul,  to  annihilate  it  and  dissipate  it — but 
in  vain  1  and  by  degrees  a  wonderful  stress  of  crea- 
tive power  came  upon  me.  I  hastily  placed  the 
lamps,  took  the  clay  in  my  hand,  and  feature  by 
feature  I  brought  forth  with  bitter  joy  the  image 
that  is  deeply  graven  in  my  heart,  believing  that 


HOMO   SUM.  221 

thus  I  might  be  released  from  the  spell.  There  is 
the  fruit  which  was  ripened  in  my  heart,  but  there, 
where  it  so  long  has  d\velt,  I  feel  a  dismal  void,  and 
if  the  husk  which  so  long  tenderly  enfolded  this 
image  were  to  wither  and  fall  asunder,  I  should 
not  wonder  at  it. — To  that  thing  there  clings  the 
best  part  of  my  life." 

"  Enough !  "  exclaimed  Dorothea,  interrupting 
her  son  who  stood  before  her  in  great  agitation  and 
with  trembling  lips.  "  God  forbid  that  that  mask 
there  should  destroy  your  life  and  soul.  I  suffer 
nothing  impure  within  my  house,  and  you  should 
not  in  your  heart.  That  which  is  evil  can  never 
more  be  fair,  and  however  lovely  the  face  there  may 
look  to  you,  it  looks  quite  as  repulsive  to  me  when 
I  reflect  that  it  probably  smiled  still  more  fascinat- 
ingly on  some  strolling  beggar.  If  the  Gaul  brings 
her  back  I  will  turn  her  out  of  my  house,  and  I  will 
destroy  her  image  with  my  own  hands  if  you  do 
not  break  it  in  pieces  on  the  spot." 

Dorothea's  eyes  were  swimming  in  tears  as  she 
spoke  these  words.  She  had  felt  with  pride  and 
emotion  during  her  son's  speech  how  noble  and  high- 
minded  he  was,  and  the  idea  that  this  rare  and  pre- 
cious treasure  should  be  spoilt  or  perhaps  altogether 
ruined  for  the  sake  of  a  lost  woman,  drove  her  to 
desperation,  and  filled  her  motherly  heart  with  in- 
dignation. 

Firmly  resolved  to  carry  out  her  threat  she  stepped 
towards  the  figure,  but  Polykarp  placed  himself  in 
her  way,  raising  his  arm  imploringly  to  defend  it, 


222  HOMO   SUM. 

and  saying,  "  Not  to-day — not  yet,  mother !  I  will 
cover  it  up,  and  will  not  look  at  it  again  till  to-mor- 
row, but  once — only  once — I  must  see  it  again  by 
sunlight." 

"  So  that  to-morrow  the  old  madness  may  revive 
in  you  ! "  cried  Dorothea.  "  Move  out  of  my  way 
or  take  the  hammer  yourself." 

"  You  order  it,  and  you  are  my  mother,"  said 
Polykarp. 

He  slowly  went  up  to  the  chest  in  which  his  tools 
and  instruments  lay,  and  bitter  tears  ran  down  his 
cheeks,  as  he  took  his  heaviest  hammer  in  his  hand. 

"When  the  sky  has  shone  for  many  days  in  summer- 
blue,  and  then  suddenly  the  clouds  gather  for  a 
storm,  when  the  first  silent  but  fearful  flash  with  its 
noisy  but  harmless  associate  the  thunder-clap  has 
terrified  the  world,  a  second  and  third  thunder-bolt 
immediately  follow.  Since  the  stormy  night  of 
yesterday  had  broken  in  on  the  peaceful,  industrious, 
and  monotonous  life  by  the  Senator's  hearth,  many 
things  had  happened  that  had  filled  him  and  his 
wife  with  fresh  anxiety. 

In  other  houses  it  was  nothing  remarkable  that  a 
slave  should  run  away,  but  in  the  Senator's  it  was 
more  than  twenty  years  since  such  a  thing  had  oc- 
curred, and  yesterday  the  goat-herd  Miriam  had 
disappeared.  This  was  vexatious,  but  the  silent 
sorrow  of  his  son  Polykarp  was  a  greater  anxiety  to 
Petrus.  It  did  not  please  him  that  the  youth,  who 
was  usually  so  vehement,  should  submit  so  unresist- 


HOMO   SUM.  223 

ingly  and  almost  indifferently  to  the  Bishop  Aga- 
pitus,  who  prohibited  his  completing  his  lions.  His 
son's  sad  gaze,  his  crushed  and  broken  aspect  were 
still  in  his  mind  when  at  last  he  went  to  rest  for  the 
night;  it  was  already  late,  but  sleep  avoided  him 
even  as  it  had  avoided  Dorothea.  While  the  mother 
was  thinking  of  her  son's  sinful  love  and  the  bleed- 
ing wound  in  his  young  and  betrayed  heart,  the 
father  grieved  for  Polykarp's  baffled  hopes  of  exer- 
cising his  art  on  a  great  work  and  recalled  the  sad- 
dest, bitterest  day  of  his  own  youth  ;  for  he  too  had 
served  his  apprenticeship  under  a  sculptor  in  Alex- 
andria, had  looked  up  to  the  works  of  the  heathen 
as  noble  models,  and  striven  to  form  himself  upon 
them.  He  had  already  been  permitted  by  his 
master  to  execute  designs  of  his  own,  and  out  of  the 
abundance  of  subjects  which  offered  themselves,  he 
had  chosen  to  model  an  Ariadne,  waiting  and  long- 
ing for  the  return  of  Theseus,  as  a  symbolic  image 
of  his  own  soul  awaiting  its  salvation.  How  this 
work  had  filled  his  mind  !  how  delightful  had  the 
hours  of  labor  seemed  to  him ! — when,  suddenly  his 
stern  father  had  come  to  the  city,  had  seen  his  work 
before  it  was  quite  finished,  and  instead  of  praising 
it  had  scorned  it ;  had  abused  it  as  a  heathen  idol, 
and  had  commanded  Petrus  to  return  home  with 
him  immediately  and  to  remain  there,  for  that  his 
son  should  be  a  pious  Christian,  aud  a  good  stone 
mason  withal — not  half  a  heathen,  and  a  maker  of 
false  gods. 

Petrus  had  much  loved  his  art,  but  he  offered  no 


224  HOMO   SUM. 

resistance  to  his  father's  orders ;  he  followed  him 
back  to  the  oasis,  there  to  superintend  the  work  of 
the  slaves  who  hewed  the  stone,  to  measure  granite- 
blocks  for  sarcophagi  and  pillars,  and  to  direct  the 
cutting  of  them. 

His  father  was  a  man  of  steel,  and  he  himself  a 
lad  of  iron,  and  when  he  saw  himself  compelled  to 
yield  to  his  father  and  to  leave  his  master's  work- 
shop, to  abandon  his  cherished  and  unfinished  work 
and  to  become  an  artizan  and  man  of  business,  he 
swore  never  again  to  take  a  piece  of  clay  in  his  hand, 
or  to  wield  a  chisel.  And  he  kept  his  word  even 
after  his  father's  death;  but  his  creative  instincts 
and  love  of  art  continued  to  live  and  work  in  him, 
and  were  transmitted  to  his  two  sons. 

Antonius  was  a  highly  gifted  artist,  and  if  Poly- 
karp's  master  was  not  mistaken,  and  if  he  himself 
were  not  misled  by  fatherly  affection,  his  second  son 
was  on  the  high  road  to  the  very  first  rank  in  art — 
to  a  position  reached  only  by  elect  spirits. 

Petrus  knew  the  models  for  the  Good  Shepherd 
and  for  the  lions,  and  declared  to  himself  that  these 
last  were  unsurpassable  in  truth,  power,  and  majesty. 
How  eagerly  must  the  young  artist  lojig  to  execute 
them  in  hard  stone,  and  to  see  them  placed  in  the 
honored,  though  indeed  pagan,  spot,  which  was  in- 
tended for  them.  And  now  the  bishop  forbade  him 
the  work,  and  the  poor  fellow  might  well  be  feeling 
just  as  he  himself  had  felt  thirty  years  ago,  when 
he  had  been  commanded  to  abandon  the  immature 
first-fruits  of  his  labor. 


HOMO   SUM.  225 

"Was  the  bishop  indeed  right?  This  and  many 
other  questions  agitated  the  sleepless  father,  and  as 
soon  as  he  heard  that  his  wife  had  risen  from  her 
bed  to  go  to  her  son,  whose  footsteps  he  too  could 
hear  overhead,  he  got  up  and  followed  her. 

He  found  the  door  of  the  work-room  open,  and,  him- 
self unseen,  unheard,  he  was  witness  to  his  wife's 
vehement  speech,  and  to  the  lad's  justification,  while 
Polykarp's  work  stood  in  the  full  light  of  the  lamps, 
exactly  in  front  of  him. 

His  gaze  was  spell-bound  to  the  mass  of  clay ;  he 
looked  and  looked,  and  was  not  weary  of  looking,  and 
his  soul  swelled  with  the  same  awe-struck  sense  of 
devout  admiration  that  it  had  experienced,  when  for 
the  first  time,  in  his  early  youth,  he  saw  with  his 
own  eyes  the  works  of  the  great  old  Athenian  mas- 
ters in  the  Caesareum. 

And  this  head  was  his  son's  work ! 

He  stood  there  greatly  overcome,  his  hands  clasped 
together,  holding  his  breath  till  his  mouth  was  dry, 
and  swallowing  his  tears  to  keep  them  from  falling. 
At  the  same  time  he  listened  with  anxious  attention, 
so  as  not  to  lose  one  word  of  Polykarp's. 

"  Aye,  thus  and  thus  only  are  great  works  of  art 
begotten,"  said  he  to  himself,  "  and  if  the  Lord  had 
bestowed  on  me  such  gifts  as  on  this  lad,  no  father, 
nay,  no  god,  should  have  compelled  me  to  leave  my 
Ariadne  unfinished.  The  attitude  of  the  body  was 
not  bad  I  should  say — but  the  head,  the  face — Aye, 
the  man,  who  can  mould  such  a  likeness  as  that  has 
his  hand  and  eye  guided  by  the  holy  spirits  of  Art. 
15 


226  HOMO   SUM. 

i 

He  who  has  done  that  head  will  be  praised  in  the 
latter  days  together  with  the  great  Athenian  masters 
— and  he — yes,  he,  merciful  Heaven  !  he  is  my  own 
beloved  son ! " 

A  blessed  sense  of  rejoicing,  such  as  he  had  not 
felt  since  his  early  youth,  filled  his  heart,  and  Doro- 
thea's ardor  seemed  to  him  half  pitiful  and  half 
amusing. 

It  was  not  till  this  duteous  son  took  the  hammer  in 
his  hand,  that  he  stepped  between  his  wife  and  the 
bust,  saying  kindly, 

"  There  will  be  time  enough  to-morrow  to  destroy 
the  work.  Forget  the  model,  my  son,  now  that  you 
have  taken  advantage  of  it  so  successfully.  I  know 
of  a  better  mistress  for  you — Art — to  whom  belongs 
everything  of  beauty  that  the  Most  High  has  created 
—Art  in  all  its  breadth  and  fulness,  not  fettered  and 
narrowed  by  any  Agapitus." 

Polykarp  flung  himself  into  his  father's  arms,  and 
the  stern  man,  hardly  master  of  his  emotions,  kissed 
the  boy's  forehead,  his  eyes,  and  his  cheeks. 


HOMO   SUM.  227 


CHAPTER  III. 

AT  noon  of  the  following  day  the  Senator  went  to 
the  women's  room,  and  while  he  was  still  on  the 
threshold,  he  asked  his  wife  who  was  busy  at  the 
loom — 

"  Where  is  Polykarp  ?  I  did  not  find  him  with 
Antonius,  who  is  working  at  the  placing  of  the  altar, 
and  I  thought  I  might  find  him  here." 

"  After  going  to  the  church,"  said  Dorothea,  "  he 
went  up  the  mountain.  Go  down  to  the  work-shops, 
Marthana,  and  see,  if  your  brother  is  come  back." 

Her  daughter  obeyed  quickly  and  gladly,  for  her 
brother  was  to  her  the  dearest,  and  seemed  to  her  to 
be  the  best,  of  men.  As  soon  as  the  pair  were  alone 
together  Petrus  said,  while  he  held  out  his  hand  to 
his  wife  with  genial  affection,  "Well,  mother — shake 
hands."  Dorothea  paused  for  an  instant,  looking 
him  in  the  face,  as  if  to  ask  him,  "  Does  your  pride 
at  la^t  allow  you  to  cease  doing  me  an  injustice?" 
It  was  a  reproach,  but  in  truth  not  a  severe  one,  or 
her  lips  would  hardly  have  trembled  so  tenderly,  as 
she  said, 

'•  You  cannot  be  angry  with  me  any  longer,  and  it 
is  well  that  all  should  once  more  be  as  it  ought." 

All  certainly  had  not   been  "as  it  ought,"   for 


228  HOMO   SUM. 

since  the  husband  and  wife  had  met  in  Polykarp's 
work-room,  they  had  behaved  to  each  other  as  if  they 
were  strangers.  In  their  bedroom,  on  the  way  to 
church,  and  at  breakfast,  they  had  spoken  to  each 
no  more  than  was  absolutely  necessary,  or  than  was 
requisite  in  order  to  conceal  their  difference  from 
the  servants  and  children.  Up  to  this  time,  an 
understanding  had  always  subsisted  between  them 
that  had  never  taken  form  in  words,  and  yet  that 
had  scarcely  in  a  single  case  been  infringed,  that 
neither  should  ever  praise  one  of  their  children  for 
anything  that  the  other  thought  blameworthy,  and 
vice-versa. 

But  in  this  night,  her  husband  had  followed  up 
her  severest  condemnation  by  passionately  embrac- 
ing the  wrong-doer.  Never  had  she  been  so  stern 
in  any  circumstances,  while  on  the  other  hand  her 
husband,  so  long  as  she  could  remember,  had  never 
been  so  soft-hearted  and  tender  to  his  son,  and  yet 
she  had  controlled  herself  so  far,  as  not  to  contradict 
Petrus  in  Polykarp's  presence,  and  to  leave  the 
work-room  in  silence  with  her  husband. 

"  When  we  are  once  alone  together  in  the  bed- 
room," thought  she, "  I  will  represent  to  him  his  error 
as  I  ought,  and  he  will  have  to  answer  for  himself." 

But  she  did  not  carry  out  this  purpose,  for  she 
felt  that  something  must  be  passing  in  her  husband's 
mind  that  she  did  not  understand ;  otherwise  how 
could  his  grave  eyes  shine  so  mildly  and  kindly,  and 
his  stern  lips  smile  so  affectionately  after  all  that 
had  occurred  when  he,  lamp  in  hand,  had  mounted 


HOMO   SUM.  229 

the  narrow  stair.  He  had  often  told  her  that  she 
could  read  his  soul  like  an  open  book,  but  she  did 
not  conceal  from  herself  that  there  were  certain 
sides  of  that  complex  structure  whose  meaning  she 
was  incapable  of  comprehending.  And  strange  to 
say,  she  ever  and  again  came  upon  these  incompre- 
hensible phases  of  his  soul,  when  the  images  of  the 
gods,  and  the  idolatrous  temples  of  the  heathen,  or 
when  their  sons'  enterprises  and  work  were  the 
matters  in  hand.  And  yet  Petrus  was  the  son  of  a 
pious  Christian;  but  his  grandfather  had  been  a 
Greek  heathen,  and  hence  perhaps  a  certain  some- 
thing wrought  in  his  blood  which  tormented  her, 
because  she  could  not  reconcile  it  with  Agapitus' 
doctrine,  but  which  she  nevertheless  dared  not  at- 
tempt to  oppose  because  her  taciturn  husband  never 
spoke  out  with  so  much  cheerfulness  and  frankness 
as  when  he  might  talk  of  these  things  with  his  sons 
and  their  friends,  who  often  accompanied  them  to 
the  oasis.  Certainly,  it  could  be  nothing  sinful  that 
at  this  particular  moment  seemed  to  light  up  her 
husband's  face,  and  restore  his  youth. 

"  They  just  are  men,"  said  she  to  herself,  "  and  in 
many  things  they  have  the  advantage  of  us  women. 
The  old  man  looks  as  he  did  on  his  wedding-day ! 
Polykarp  is  the  very  image  of  him,  as  every  one 
says,  and  now,  looking  at  the  father,  and  recalling 
to  my  mind  how  the  boy  looked  when  he  told  me 
how  he  could  not  refrain  from  making  Sirona's 
portrait,  I  must  say  that  I  never  saw  such  a  likeness 
in  the  whole  course  of  my  life." 


230  HOMO  SUM. 

He  bid  her  a  friendly  good-night,  and  extinguished 
the  lamp.  She  would  willingly  have  said  a  loving 
word  to  him,  for  his  contented  expression  touched 
and  comforted  her,  but  that  would  just  then  have 
been  too  much  after  what  she  had  gone  through  in 
her  son's  work-room.  In  former  years  it  had  hap- 
pened pretty  often  that,  when  one  of  them  had 
caused  dissatisfaction  to  the  other,  and  there  had 
been  some  quarrel  between  them,  they  had  gone  to 
rest  unreconciled,  but  the  older  they  grew  the  more 
rarely  did  this  occur,  and  it  was  now  a  long  time 
since  any  shadow  had  fallen  on  the  perfect  serenity 
of  their  married  life. 

Three  years  ago,  on  the  occasion  of  the  marriage 
of  their  eldest  son,  they  had  been  standing  together, 
looking  up  at  the  starry  sky,  when  Petrus  had  come 
close  up  to  her,  and  had  said, 

"How  calmly  and  peacefully  the  wanderers  up 
there  follow  their  roads  without  jostling  or  touching 
one  another!  As  I  walked  home  alone  from  the 
quarries  by  their  friendly  light,  I  thought  of  many 
things.  Perhaps  there  was  once  a  time  when  the 
stars  rushed  wildly  about  in  confusion,  crossing  each 
other's  path,  while  many  a  star  flew  in  pieces  at  the 
impact.  Then  the  Lord  created  man,  and  love  came 
into  the  world  and  filled  the  Heavens  and  the  earth, 
and  he  commanded  the  stars  to  be  our  light  by 
night ;  then  each  began  to  respect  the  path  of  the 
other,  and  the  stars  more  rarely  came  into  collision 
till  even  the  smallest  and  swiftest  kept  to  its  own 
path  and  its  own  period,  and  the  shining  host  above 


HOMO   SUM.  231 

grew  to  be  as  harmonious  as  it  is  numberless.  Love 
and  a  common  purpose  worked  this  marvel,  for  he 
who  loves  another,  will  do  him  no  injury,  and  he 
who  is  bound  to  perfect  a  work  with  the  help  of 
another,  will  not  hinder  nor  delay  him.  "We  two 
have  long  since  found  the  right  road,  and  if  at  any 
time  one  of  us  is  inclined  to  cross  the  path  of  the 
other  we  are  held  back  by  love  and  by  our  common 
duty,  namely,  to  shed  a  pure  light  on  the  path  of 
our  children." 

Dorothea  had  never  forgotten  these  words,  and 
they  came  into  her  mind  now  again  when  Petrus 
held  out  his  hand  to  her  so  warmly  ;  as  she  laid  hers 
in  it,  she  said, 

"  For  the  sake  of  dear  peace,  well  and  good — but 
one  thing  I  cannot  leave  unsaid.  Soft-hearted 
weakness  is  not  usually  your  defect,  but  you  will 
utterly  spoil  Polykarp." 

"  Leave  him,  let  us  leave  him  as  he  is,"  cried  Petrus, 
kissing  his  wife's  brow.  "  It  is  strange  how  we  have 
exchanged  parts  !  Yesterday  you  were  exhorting  me 
to  mildness  towards  the  lad,  and  to-day— 

"  To-day  I  am  severer  than  you,"  interrupted 
Dorothea.  "  Who,  indeed,  could  guess  that  an  old 
gray-beard  would  derogate  from  the  duties  of  his 
office  as  father  and  as  judge  for  the  sake  of  a 
woman's  smiling  face  in  clay — as  Esau  sold  his  birth- 
right for  a  mess  of  pottage  ?  " 

"  And  to  whom  would  it  occur,"  asked  Petrus, 
taking  up  his  wife's  tone,  "  that  so  tender  a  mother 
as  you  would  condemn  her  favorite  son,  because  he 


232  HOMO   SUM. 

labored  to  earn  peace  for  his  soul  by  a  deed — by  a 
work  for  which  his  master  might  envy  him  ?  " 

"  I  have  indeed  observed,"  interruped  Dorothea, 
"  that  Sirona's  image  has  bewitched  you,  and  you 
speak  as  if  the  boy  had  achieved  some  great  miracle. 
I  do  not  know  much  about  modelling  and  sculpture, 
and  I  will  not  contradict  you,  but  if  the  fair-haired 
creature's  face  were  less  pretty,  and  if  Polykarp  had 
had  not  executed  anything  remarkable,  would  it 
have  made  the  smallest  difference  in  what  he  has 
done  and  felt  wrong  ?  Certainly  not.  But  that  is 
just  like  men,  they  care  only  for  success." 

"  And  with  perfect  justice,"  answered  Petrus,  "  if 
the  success  is  attained,  not  in  mere  child's  play,  but 
by  a  severe  struggle.  "  To  him  that  hath,  shall 
more  be  given,'  says  the  scripture,  and  he  who  has  a 
soul  more  richly  graced  than  others  have — he  who 
is  helped  by  good  spirits — he  shall  be  forgiven  many 
things  that  even  a  mild  judge  would  be  unwilling  to 
pardon  in  a  man  of  poor  gifts  who  torments  and 
exerts  himself  and  yet  brings  nothing  to  perfection. 
Be  kind  to  the  boy  again.  Do  you  know  what 
prospect  lies  before  you  through  him  ?  You  your- 
self in  your  life  have  done  much  good,  and  spoken 
much  wisdom,  and  I,  and  the  children,  and  the  people 
in  this  place,  will  never  forget  it  all.  But  I  can 
promise  you  the  gratitude  of  the  best  and  noblest 
who  now  live  or  who  will  live  in  centuries  to  come — 
for  that  you  are  the  mother  of  Polykarp !  " 

"  And  people  say,"  cried  Dorothea,  "  that  every 
mother  has  four  eyes  for  her  children's  merits. 


HOMO  SUM.  233 

If  that  is  true,  then  fathers  no  doubt  have  ten,  and 
you  as  many  as  Argus,  of  whom  the  heathen  legend 
speaks —  But  here  comes  Polykarp." 

Petrus  went  forward  to  meet  his  son,  and  gave 
him  his  hand,  but  in  quite  a  different  manner  to  what 
he  had  formerly  shown ;  at  least  it  seemed  to  Doro- 
thea that  her  husband  received  the  youth,  no  longer 
as  his  father  and  master,  but  as  a  friend  greets  a 
friend  who  is  his  equal  in  privileges  and  judgment. 
When  Polykarp  turned  to  greet  her  also  she  colored 
all  over,  for  the  thought  flashed  though  her  mind  that 
her  son,  when  he  thought  of  the  past  night,  must 
regard  her  as  unjust  or  foolish  ;  but  she  soon  recov- 
ered her  own  calm  equanimity,  for  Polykarp  was 
the  same  as  ever,  and  she  read  in  his  eyes  that  he 
felt  towards  her  the  same  as  yesterday  and  as 
ever. 

"  Love,  "  thought  she,  "  is  not  extinguished  by 
injustice,  as  fire  is  by  water.  It  blazes  up  brighter 
or  less  bright,  no  doubt,  according  to  the  way  the 
wind  blows,  but  it  cannot  be  wholly  smothered — 
least  of  all  by  death." 

Polykarp  had  been  up  the  mountain,  and  Dorothea 
was  quite  satisfied  when  he  related  what  had  led  him 
thither.  He  had  long  since  planned  the  execution 
of  a  statue  of  Moses,  and  when  his  father  had  left 
him,  he  could  not  get  the  tall  and  dignified  figure  of 
the  old  man  out  of  his  mind.  He  felt  that  he  had 
found  the  right  model  for  his  work.  He  mast,  he 
would  forget — and  he  knew,  that  he  could  only 
succeed  if  he  found  a  task  which  might  promise  to 


234  HOMO  SUM. 

give  some  new  occupation  to  his  bereaved  soul. 
Still,  he  had  seen  the  form  of  the  mighty  man  of 
God  which  he  proposed  to  model,  only  in  vague 
outline  before  his  mind's  eye,  and  he  had  been 
prompted  to  go  to  a  spot  whither  many  pilgrims 
resorted,  and  which  was  known  as  the  Place  of 
Communion,  because  it  was  there  that  the  Lord  had 
spoken  to  Moses.  There  Polykarp  had  spent  some 
time,  for  there,  if  anywhere — there,  where  the  Law- 
giver himself  had  stood,  must  he  find  right  inspira- 
tion. 

"  And  you  have  accomplished  your  end  ?  "  asked 
his  father. 

Polykarp  shook  his  head. 

"  If  you  go  often  enough  to  the  sacred  spot,  it 
will  come  to  you,"  said  Dorothea.  "  The  beginning 
is  always  the  chief  difficulty  ;  only  begin  at  once  to 
model  your  father's  head." 

"  I  have  already  begun  it,"  replied  Polykarp, "  but 
I  am  still  tired  from  last  night." 

"  You  look  pale,  and  have  dark  lines  under  your 
eyes,"  said  Dorothea  anxiously.  "  Go  upstairs  and 
lie  down  to  rest.  I  will  follow  you  and  bring  you 
a  beaker  of  old  wine." 

"  That  will  not  hurt  him,"  said  Petrus,  thinking 
as  he  spoke — "  A  draught  of  Lethe  would  serve  him 
even  better." 

"When,  an  hour  later,  the  Senator  sought  his  son 
in  his  work-room,  he  found  him  sleeping,  and  the 
wine  stood  untouched  on  the  table.  Petrus  softly 
laid  his  hand  on  his  son's  forehead  and  found  it  cool 


HOMO  SUM.  235 

and  free  from  fever.  Then  he  went  quietly  up  to 
the  portrait  of  Sirona,  raised  the  cloth  with  which  it 
was  covered,  and  stood  before  it  a  long  time  sunk  in 
thought.  At  last  he  drew  back,  covered  it  up  again, 
and  examined  the  models  which  stood  on  a  shelf 
fastened  to  the  wall. 

A  small  female  figure  particularly  fixed  his  atten- 
tion, and  he  was  taking  it  admiringly  in  his  hand 
when  Polykarp  a \voke. 

"  That  is  the  image  of  the  goddess  of  fate — that 
is  a  Tyche,"  said  Petrus. 

"  Do  not  be  angry  with  me,  father,"  entreated 
Polykarp.  "  You  know  the  figure  of  a  Tyche  is  to 
stand  in  the  hand  of  the  statue  of  the  Caesar  that  is 
intended  for  the  new  city  of  Constantine,  and  so  I 
have  tried  to  represent  the  goddess.  The  drapery 
and  pose  of  the  arms,  I  think,  have  succeeded,  but  I 
failed  in  the  head." 

Petrus,  who  had  listened  to  him  with  attention, 
glanced  involuntarily  at  the  head  of  Sirona,  and 
Polykarp  followed  his  eyes  surprised  and  almost 
startled. 

The  father  and  son  had  understood  each  other, 
and  Polykarp  said, 

"  I  had  already  thought  of  that." 

Then  he  sighed  bitterly,  and  said  to  himself, 

"  Yes  and  verily,  she  is  the  goddess  of  my  fate." 
But  he  dared  not  utter  this  aloud. 

But  Petrus  had  heard  him  sigh,  and  said,  "  Let 
that  pass.  This  head  smiles  with  sweet  fascination, 
and  the  countenance  of  the  goddess  that  rules  the 


236  HOMO  SUM. 

actions  even  of  the  immortals,  should  be  stern  and 
grave." 

Polykarp  could  contain  himself  no  longer. 

"  Yes,  father,"  he  exclaimed.  "  Fate  is  terrible — 
and  yet  I  will  represent  the  goddess  with  a  smiling 
mouth,  for  that  which  is  most  terrible  in  her  is,  that 
she  rules  not  by  stern  laws,  but  smiles  while  she 
makes  us  her  sport." 


HOMO   SUM.  237 


CHAPTER  IY. 

IT  was  a  splendid  morning ;  not  a  cloud  dimmed 
the  sky  which  spread  high  above  desert,  mountain, 
and  oasis,  like  an  arched  tent  of  uniform  deep-blue 
silk  How  delicious  it  is  to  breathe  the  pure,  light, 
aromatic  air  on  the  heights,  before  the  rays  of  the 
sun  acquire  their  midday  power,  and  the  shadows 
of  the  heated  porphyry  cliffs  growing  shorter  and 
shorter,  at  last  wholly  disappear  ! 

With  what  delight  did  Sirona  inhale  that  pure  at- 
mosphere, when  after  a  long  night — the  fourth  that 
she  had  passed  in  the  anchorite's  dismal  cave — she 
stepped  out  into  the  air.  Paulus  sat  by  the  hearth, 
and  was  so  busily  engaged  with  some  carving,  that 
he  did  not  observe  her  approach. 

"  Kind  good  man !  "  thought  Sirona,  as  she  per- 
ceived a  steaming  pot  on  the  fire,  and  the  palm- 
branches  which  the  Alexandrian  had  fastened  up  by 
the  entrance  to  the  cave,  to  screen  her  from  the 
mounting  sun.  She  knew  the  way  without  a  guide 
to  the  spring  from  which  Paulus  had  brought  her 
water  at  their  first  meeting,  and  she  now  slipped 
away,  and  went  down  to  it  with  a  pretty  little 
pitcher  of  burnt  clay  in  her  hand.  Paulus  did  indeed 
see  her,  but  he  made  as  though  he  neither  saw  nor 


238  HOMO   SUM. 

heard,  for  he  knew  she  was  going  there  to  wash  her- 
self, and  to  dress  and  smarten  herself  as  well  as  might 
be — for  was  she  not  a  woman !  When  she  returned, 
she  looked  not  "less  fresh  and  charming  than  on  that 
morning  when  she  had  been  seen  and  vatched  by 
Hernias.  True,  her  heart  was  sore,  true,  she  was 
perplexed  and  miserable,  but  sleep  and  rest  had  long 
since  effaced  from  her  healthy,  youthful  and  elastic 
frame  all  traces  left  by  that  fearful  day  of  flight ; 
and  fate,  which  often  means  best  by  us  when  it 
shows  us  a  hostile  face,  had  sent  her  a  minor  anxiety 
to  divert  her  from  her  graver  cares. 

Her  greyhound  was  very  ill,  and  it  seemed  that 
in  the  ill-treatment  it  had  experienced,  not  only  its 
leg  had  been  broken,  but  that  it  had  suffered  some 
internal  injury.  The  brisk,  lively  little  creature  fell 
down  powerless  whenever  it  tried  to  stand,  and 
when  she  took  it  up  to  nurse  it  comfortably  in  her 
lap,  it  whined  pitifully,  and  looked  up  at  her  sorrow- 
fully, and  as  if  complaining  to  her.  It  would  take 
neither  food  nor  drink ;  its  cool  little  nose  was  hot ; 
and  when  she  left  the  cave,  lambe  lay  panting  on 
the  fine  woollen  coverlet  which  Paulus  had  spread 
upon  the  bed,  unable  even  to  look  after  her. 

Before  taking  the  dog  the  water  she  had  fetched 
in  the  graceful  jar — which  was  another  gift  from  her 
hospitable  friend — she  went  up  to  Paulus  and  greeted 
him  kindly.  He  looked  up  from  his  work,  thanked 
her,  and  a  few  minutes  later,  when  she  came  out  of 
the  cave  again,  asked  her,  "  How  is  the  poor  little 
creature  ? " 


HOMO   SUM.  239 

Sirona  shrugged  her  shoulders,  and  said  sadly, 
"  She  has  drunk  nothing,  and  does  not  even  know 
me>  and  pants  as  rapidly  as  last  evening — if  I  were 
to  lose  the  poor  little  beast  !— 

She  could  say  no  more  for  emotion,  but  Paulus 
shook  his  head. 

"  It  is  sinful,"  he  said,  "  to  grieve  so  for  a  beast 
devoid  of  reason." 

"  lambe  is  not  devoid  of  reason,"  replied  Sirona. 
"  And  even  if  she  were,  what  have  I  left  if  she  dies? 
She  grew  up  in  my  father's  house,  where  all  loved 
me  ;  I  had  her  first  when  she  was  only  a  few  days 
old,  and  I  brought  her  up  on  milk  on  a  little  bit  of 
sponge.  Many  a  time,  wnen  I  heard  the  little  thing 
whining  for  food,  have  I  got  out  of  bed  at  night 
with  bare  feet ;  and  so  she  came  to  cling  to  me  like 
a  child,  and  could  not  do  without  me.  No  one  can 
know  how  another  feels  about  such  things.  My 
father  used  to  tell  us  of  a  spider  that  beautified  the 
life  of  a  prisoner,  and  what  is  a  dirty  dumb  creature 
like  that  to  my  clever,  graceful  little  dog !  I  have 
lost  my  home,  and  here  every  one  believes  the  worst 
of  me,  although  I  have  done  no  one  any  harm,  and 
no  one,  no  one  loves  me  but  lambe." 

"  But  I  know  of  one  who  loves  every  one  with  a 
divine  and  equal  love,"  interrupted  Paulus. 

"  I  do  not  care  for  such  a  one,"  answered  Sirona. 
"  lambo  follows  no  one  but  me ;  what  good  can  a 
love  do  me  that  I  must  share  with  all  the  world  ! 
But  you  mean  the  crucified  God  of  the  Christians? 
He  is  good  and  pitiful,  so  says  Dame  Dorothea ;  but 


240  HOMO   SUM. 

he  is  dead — I  cannot  see  Him,  nor  hear  Him,  and, 
certainly,  I  cannot  long  for  one  who  only  shows  me 
grace.  I  want  one  to  whom  I  can  count  for  some- 
thing, and  to  whose  life  and  happiness  I  am  indis- 
pensable." 

A  scarcely  perceptible  shudder  thrilled  through 
the  Alexandrian  as  she  spoke  these  words,  and  he 
thought  as  he  glanced  at  her  face  and  figure  with 
a  mingled  expression  of  regret  and  admiration, 
"  Satan,  before  he  fell,  was  the  fairest  among  the 
pure  spirits,  and  he  still  has  power  over  this  woman. 
She  is  still  far  from  being  ripe  for  salvation,  and  yet 
she  has  a  gentle  heart,  and  even  if  she  has  erred,  she 
is  not  lost." 

Sirona's  eyes  had  met  his,  and  she  said  with  a  sigh, 
"  You  look  at  me  so  compassionately — if  only  lambe 
were  well,  and  if  I  succeeded  in  reaching  Alexan- 
dria, my  destiny  would  perhaps  take  a  turn  for  the 
better." 

Paulus  had  risen  while  she  spoke,  and  had  taken 
the  pot  from  the  hearth  ;  he  now  offered  it  to  his 
guest,  saying, 

"  For  the  present  we  will  trust  to  this  broth  to 
compensate  to  you  for  the  delights  of  the  capital  ;  I 
am  glad  that  you  relish  it.  But  tell  me  now,  have 
you  seriously  considered  what  danger  may  threaten 
a  beautiful,  young,  and  unprotected  woman  in  the 
wicked  city  of  the  Greeks  ?  "Would  it  not  be  better 
that  you  should  submit  to  the  consequences  of  your 
guilt,  and  return  to  Phcebicius,  to  whom  unfortu- 
nately you  belong  ? " 


HOMO   SUM.  241 

Sirona,  at  these  words,  had  set  down  the  vessel 
out  of  which  she  was  eating,  and  rising  in  passionate 
haste,  she  exclaimed, 

"  That  shall  never,  never  be !  " — And  when  I  was 
sitting  up  there  half  dead,  and  took  your  step  for 
that  of  Phcebicius,  the  gods  showed  me  a  way  to  es- 
cape from  him,  and  from  you  or  any  one  who  would 
drag  me  back  to  him.  "When  I  fled  to  the  edge  of 
the  abyss,  I  was  raving  and  crazed,  but  what  I  then 
would  have  done  in  my  madness,  I  would  do  now  in 
cold  blood — as  surely  as  I  hope  to  see  my  own  people 
in  Arelas  once  more!  "What  was  I  once,  and  to 
what  have  I  come  through  Phcebicius !  Life  was  to 
me  a  sunny  garden  with  golden  trellises  and  shady 
trees  and  waters  as  bright  as  crystal,  with  rosy 
flowers  and  singing  birds ;  and  he,  he  has  darkened 
its  light,  and  fouled  its  springs,  and  broken  down  its 
flowers.  All  now  seems  dumb  and  colorless,  and  if 
the  abyss  is  my  grave,  no  one  will  miss  me  nor 
mourn  for  me." 

"  Poor  woman !  "  said  Paulus.  "  Your  husband 
then  showed  you  very  little  love." 

"  Love,"  laughed  Sirona,  "  Phcebicius  and  love ! 
Only  yesterday  I  told  you,  how  cruelly  he  used  to 
torture  me  after  his  feasts,  when  he  was  drunk  or 
when  he  recovered  from  one  of  his  swoons.  But  one 
thing  he  did  to  me,  one  thing  which  broke  the  last 
thread  of  a  tie  between  us.  No  one  yet  has  ever 
heard  a  word  of  it  from  me ;  not  even  Dorothea, 
who  often  blamed  me  when  I  let  slip  a  hard  word 

against  my  husband.    It  was  well  for  her  to  talk — 
16 


242  HOMO   SUM. 

if  I  had  found  a  husband  like  Petrus  I  might  per- 
haps have  been  like  Dorothea.  It  is  a  marvel,  which 
I  myself  do  not  understand,  that  I  did  not  grow 
wicked  with  such  a  man,  a  man  who — why  should  I 
conceal  it — who,  when  we  were  at  Rome,  because  he 
was  in  debt,  and  because  be  hoped  to  get  promotion 
through  his  legate  Quintillus,  sold  me—  me — to  him. 
He  himself  brought  the  old  man — who  had  often 
followed  me  about — into  his  house,  but  our  hostess, 
a  good  woman,  had  overheard  the  matter,  and  be- 
trayed it  all  to  me.  It  is  so  base,  so  vile — it  seems 
to  blacken  my  soul  only  to  think  of  it !  The  legate 
got  little  enough  in  return  for  his  sesterces,  but 
Phoebicius  did  not  restore  his  wages  of  sin,  and  his 
rage  against  me  knew  no  bounds  when  he  was  trans- 
ferred to  the  oasis  at  the  instigation  of  his  betrayed 
chief.  JSTow  you  know  all,  and  never  advise  me 
again  to  return  to  that  man  to  whom  my  misfortune 
has  bound  me. 

"  Only  listen  how  the  poor  little  beast  in  there  is 
whining.  It  wants  to  come  to  me,  and  has  not  the 
strength  to  move." 

Paulus  looked  after  her  sympathetically  as  she 
disappeared  under  the  opening  in  the  rock,  and  he 
awaited  her  return  with  folded  arms.  He  could  not 
see  into  the  cave,  for  the  space  in  which  the  bed 
stood  was  closed  at  the  end  by  the  narrow  passage 
which  formed  the  entrance,  and  which  joined  it  at 
an  angle  as  the  handle  of  a  scythe  joins  the  blade. 
She  remained  a  long  time,  and  he  could  hear  now 
and  then  a  tender  word  with  which  she  tried  to 


HOMO   SUM.  243 

comfort  the  suffering  creature.  Suddenly  he  was 
startled  by  a  loud  and  bitter  cry  from  Sirona ;  no 
doubt,  the  poor  woman's  affectionate  little  com- 
panion was  dead,  and  in  the  dim  twilight  of  the 
cave  she  had  seen  its  dulled  eye,  and  felt  the  stiff- 
ness of  death  overspreading  and  paralyzing  its 
slender  limbs.  He  dared  not  go  into  the  cavern, 
but  he  felt  his  eyes  fill  with  tears,  and  he  would 
willingly  have  spoken  some  word  of  consolation  to 
her. 

At  last  she  came  out,  her  eyes  red  with  weeping. 
Paulus  had  guessed  rightly  for  she  held  the  body  of 
little  lambe  in  her  arms. 

"  How  sorry  I  am,"  said  Paulus,  "  the  poor  little 
creature  was  so  pretty." 

Sirona  nodded,  sat  down,  and  unfastened  the 
prettily  embroidered  band  from  the  dog's  neck,  say- 
ing half  to  herself,  and  half  to  Paulus, 

"  My  little  Agnes  worked  this  collar.  I  myself 
had  taught  her  to  sew,  and  this  was  the  first  piece 
of  work  that  was  all  her  o\vn."  She  held  the  collar 
up  to  the  anchorite.  "  This  clasp  is  of  real  silver," 
she  went  on,  "  and  my  father  himself  gave  it  to  me. 
He  was  fond  of  the  poor  little  dog  too.  JSrow  it  will 
never  leap  and  spring  again,  poor  thing." 

She  looked  sadly  down  at  the  dead  dog.  Then 
she  collected  herself,  and  said  hurriedly, 

"  Now  I  will  go  away  from  here.  Nothing — 
nothing  keeps  me  any  longer  in  this  wilderness,  for 
the  Senator's  house,  where  I  have  spent  many  happy 
hours,  and  where  everyone  was  fond  of  me,  is  closed 


244  HOMO   SUM. 

against  me,  and  must  ever  be  so  long  as  he  lives 
there.  If  you  have  not  been  kind  to  me  only  to  do 
me  harm  in  the  end,  let  me  go  to-day,  and  help  me 
to  reach  Alexandria." 

"  Not  to-day,  in  any  case  not  to  day,"  replied  Pau- 
lus.  "  First  I  must  find  out  when  a  vessel  sails  for 
Klysma  or  for  Berenike,  and  then  I  have  many  other 
things  to  see  to  for  you.  You  owe  me  an  answer 
to  my  question,  as  to  what  you  expect  to  do  and  to 
find  in  Alexandria.  Poor  child — the  younger  and 
the  fairer  you  are — " 

"  I  know  all  you  would  say  to  me,"  interrupted 
Sirona.  "  "Wherever  I  have  been,  I  have  attracted 
the  eyes  of  men,  and  when  I  have  read  in  their  looks 
that  I  pleased  them,  it  has  greatly  pleased  me — why 
should  I  deny  it  ?  Many  a  one  has  spoken  fair  words 
to  me  or  given  me  flowers,  and  sent  old  women  to 
my  house  to  win  me  for  them,  but  even  if  one  has 
happened  to  please  me  better  than  another,  still  I 
have  never  found  it  hard  to  send  them  home  again 
as  was  fitting." 

"  Till  Hermas  laid  his  love  at  your  feet,"  said  Pau- 
lus.  "  He  is  a  bold  lad—" 

"  A  pretty,  inexperienced  boy,"  said  Sirona, 
"  neither  more  nor  less.  It  was  a  heedless  thing,  no 
doubt,  to  admit  him  to  my  rooms,  but  no  Yestal 
need  be  ashamed  to  own  to  such  favor  as  I  showed 
him.  I  am  innocent,  and  I  will  remain  so  that  I  may 
stand  in  my  father's  presence  without  a  blush  when 
I  have  earned  money  enough  in  the  capital  for  the 
long  journey." 


HOMO  SUM.  245 

Paulus  looked  in  her  face  astonished  and  almost 
horrified. 

Then  he  had  in  fact  taken  on  himself  guilt  which 
did  not  exist,  and  perhaps  the  Senator  would  have 
been  slower  to  condemn  Sirona,  if  it  had  not  been 
for  his  falsely  acknowledging  it.  He  stood  before 
her,  feeling  like  a  child  that  would  fain  put  together 
some  object  of  artistic  workmanship,  and  who  has 
broken  it  to  pieces  for  want  of  skill.  At  the  same 
time  he  could  not  doubt  a  word  that  she  said,  for  the 
voice  within  him  had  long  since  plainly  told  him  that 
this  woman  was  no  common  criminal. 

For  some  time  he  was  at  a  loss  for  words  ;  at  last 
he  said  timidly, 

"  "What  do  you  purpose  doing  in  Alexandria  ?  " 

"  Polykarp  says,  that  all  good  work  finds  a  pur- 
chaser there,"  she  answered.  "  And  I  can  weave 
particularly  well,  and  embroider  with  gold-thread. 
Perhaps  I  may  find  shelter  under  some  roof  where 
there  are  children,  and  I  would  willingly  attend  to 
them  during  the  day.  In  my  free  time  and  at  night 
I  could  work  at  my  frame,  and  when  I  have  scraped 
enough  together  I  shall  soon  find  a  ship  that  will 
carry  me  to  Gaul,  to  my  own  people.  Do  you  not 
see  that  I  cannot  go  back  to  Phcebicius,  and  can  you 
help  me  ? " 

"Most  willingly,  and  better  perhaps  than  you 
fancy,"  said  Paulus.  "  I  cannot  explain  this  to  you 
just  now ;  but  you  need  not  request  me,  but  may 
rather  feel  that  you  have  a  good  right  to  demand  of 
me  that  I  should  rescue  you." 


246  HOMO   SUM. 

She  looked  at  him  in  surprised  inquiry,  and  he  con- 
tinued, 

"  First  let  me  carry  away  the  little  dog,  and  bury 
it  down  there.  I  will  put  a  stone  over  the  grave, 
that  you  may  know  where  it  lies.  It  must  be  so,  the 
body  cannot  lie  here  any  longer.  Take  the  thing 
that  lies  there.  I  had  tried  before  to  cut  it  out  for 
you,  for  you  complained  yesterday  that  your  hair 
was  all  in  a  tangle  because  you  had  not  a  comb,  so  I 
tried  to  carve  you  one  out  of  bone.  There  were 
none  at  the  shop  in  the  oasis,  and  I  am  myself  only 
a  wild  creature  of  the  wilderness,  a  sorry,  foolish 
animal,  and  do  not  use  one.  Was  that  a  stone  that 
fell  ?  Aye,  certainly,  I  hear  a  man's  step ;  go  quickly 
into  the  cave  and  do  not  stir  till  I  call  you." 

Sirona  withdrew  into  her  rock-dwelling,  and  Pau- 
lus  took  the  body  of  the  dog  in  his  arms  to  conceal 
it  from  the  man  who  was  approaching.  He  looked 
round,  undecided,  and  seeking  a  hiding-place  for  it, 
but  two  sharp  eyes  had  already  detected  him  and 
his  small  burden  from  the  height  above  him  ;  before 
he  had  found  a  suitable  place,  stones  were  rolling 
and  crashing  down  from  the  cliff  to  the  right  of  the 
cavern,  and  at  the  same  time  a  man  came  springing 
down  with  rash  boldness  from  rock  to  rock,  and 
without  heeding  the  warning  voice  of  the  an- 
chorite, flung  himself  down  the  slope,  straight  in 
front  of  him,  exclaiming,  while  he  struggled  for 
breath  and  his  face  was  hot  with  hatred  and  excite- 
ment. 

"uThat — I  know  it  well — that  is  Sirona's  greyhound 


HOMO   SUM.  247 

— where  is  its  mistress  ?  Tell  me  this  instant,  where 
is  Sirona — I  must  and  will  know." 

Paulus  had  frequently  seen,  from  the  penitents' 
room  in  the  church,  the  Senator  and  his  family  in 
their  places  near  the  altar,  and  he  was  much  aston- 
ished to  recognize  in  the  daring  leaper,  who  rushed 
upon  him  like  a  madman,  with  dishevelled  hair  and 
fiery  eyes,  Polykarp,  Petrus'  second  son. 

The  anchorite  found  it  difficult  to  preserve  his 
calm,  and  composed  demeanor,  for  since  he  had 
been  aware  that  he  had  accused  Sirona  falsely  of  a 
heavy  sin,  while  at  the  same  time  he  had  equally 
falsely  confessed  himself  the  partner  of  her  misdeed, 
he  felt  an  anxiety  that  amounted  to  anguish,  and 
a  leaden  oppression  checked  the  rapidity  of  his' 
thoughts.  He  at  first  stammered  out  a  few  unintelli- 
gible words,  but  his  opponent  was  in  fearful  earnest 
with  his  question  ;  he  seized  the  collar  of  the  anchor- 
ite's coarse  garment  with  terrible  violence,  and  cried 
in  a  husky  voice,  "  Where  did  you  find  the  dog  ? 
Where  is— 1" 

But  suddenly  he  left  go  his  hold  of  the  Alexan- 
drian, looked  at  him  from  head  to  foot,  and  said 
softly  and  slowly, 

"  Can  it  be  possible  ?  Are  you  Paulus  the  Alex- 
andrian ? " 

The  anchorite  nodded  assent.  Polykarp  laughed 
loud  and  bitterly,  pressed  his  hand  to  his  forehead, 
and  exclaimed  in  a  tone  of  the  deepest  disgust  and 
contempt, 

"  And  is  it  so,  indeed  !  and  such  a  repulsive  ape 


248  HOMO   SUM. 

too  !  But  I  will  not  believe  that  she  even  held  out 
a  hand  to  you,  for  the  mere  sight  of  you  makes  me 
dirty."  Paulus  felt  his  heart  beating  like  a  hammer 
within  his  breast,  and  there  was  a  singing  and  roar- 
ing in  his  ears.  When  once  more  Polykarp  threat- 
ened him  with  his  fist  he  involuntarily  took  the  pos- 
ture of  an  athlete  in  a  wrestling  match,  he  stretched 
out  his  arms  to  try  to  get  a  good  hold  of  his  adver- 
sary, and  said  in  a  hollow,  deep  tone  of  angry  warn- 
ing, "  Stand  back,  or  something  will  happen  to  you 
that  will  not  be  good  for  your  bones." 

The  speaker  was  indeed  Paulus — and  yet — not 
Paulus ;  it  was  Menander,  the  pride  of  the  Palaestra, 
who  had  never  let  pass  a  word  of  his  comrades  that 
did  not  altogether  please  him.  And  yet  yesterday 
in  the  oasis  he  had  quietly  submitted  to  far  worse 
insults  than  Polykarp  had  offered  him,  and  had  ac- 
cepted them  with  contented  cheerfulness.  Whence 
then  to-day  this  wild  sensitiveness  and  eager  desire 
to  fight?  * 

When,  two  days  since,  he  had  gone  to  his  old  cave 
to  fetch  the  last  of  his  hidden  gold  pieces,  he  had 
wished  to  greet  old  Stephanus,  but  the  Egyptian 
attendant  had  scared  him  off  like  an  evil  spirit  with 
angry  curses,  and  had  thrown  stones  after  him.  In 
the  oasis  he  had  attempted  to  enter  the  church  in 
spite  of  the  bishop's  prohibition,  there  to  put  up  a 
prayer  ;  for  he  thought  that  the  antechamber,  where 
the  spring  was  and  in  which  penitents  were  wont  to 
tarry,  would  certainly  not  be  closed  even  to  him  ; 
but  the  acolytes  had  driven  him  away  with  abusive 


HOMO   SUM.  249 

Words,  and  the  door-keeper,  who  a  short  time  since 
had  trusted  him  with  the  key,  spit  in  his  face,  and 
yet  he  had  not  found  it  difficult  to  turn  his  back  on 
his  persecutors  without  anger  or  complaint. 

At  the  counter  of  the  dealer  of  whom  he  had 
bought  the  woollen  coverlet,  the  little  jug,  and  many 
other  things  for  Sirona,  a  priest  had  passed  by,  had 
pointed  to  his  money,  and  had  said, 

"  Satan  takes  care  of  his  own." 

Paulus  had  answered  him  nothing,  had  returned 
to  his  charge  with  an  uplifted  and  grateful  heart, 
and  had  heartily  rejoiced  once  more  in  the  exalted 
and  encouraging  consciousness  that  he  was  enduring 
disgrace  and  suffering  for  another  in  humble  imitation 
of  Christ.  What  was  it  then  that  made  him  so  acutely 
sensitive  with  regard  to  Polykarp,  and  once  more 
snapped  those  threads,  which  long  years  of  self-denial 
had  twined  into  fetters  for  his  impatient  spirit? 
Was  it  that  to  the  man,  who  mortified  his  flesh  in 
order  to  free  his  soul  from  its  bonds  it  seemed 
a  lighter  matter  to  be  contemned  as  a  sinner, 
hated  of  God,  than  to  let  his  person  and  his 
manly  dignity  be  treated  with  contempt  ?  Was  he 
thinking  of  the  fair  listener  in  the  cave,  who  was  a 
witness  to  his  humiliation  ?  Had-  his  wrath  blazed 
up  because  he  saw  in  Polykarp,  not  so  much  an  ex- 
asperated fellow-believer,  as  merely  a  man  who  with 
bold  scorn  had  put  himself  in  the  path  of  another 
man? 

The  lad  and  the  gray-bearded  athlete  stood  face  to 
face  like  mortal  enemies  ready  for  the  fight,  and 


250  HOMO  SUM. 

Polykarp  did  not  waver,  although  he,  like  most 
Christian  youths,  had  been  forbidden  to  take  part 
in  the  wrestling-games  in  the  Palaestra,  and  though 
he  knew  that  he  had  to  deal  with  a  strong  and 
practised  antagonist.  He  himself  was  indeed  no 
weakling,  and  his  stormy  indignation  added  to  his 
desire  to  measure  himself  against  the  hated  seducer. 

"  Come  on — come  on  ! "  he  cried  ;  his  eyes  flash- 
ing, and  leaning  forward  with  his  neck  outstretched 
and  ready  on  his  part  for  the  struggle.  "  Grip  hold ! 
you  were  a  gladiator,  or  something  of  the  kind,  be- 
fore you  put  on  that  filthy  dress  that  you  might 
break  into  houses  at  night,  and  go  unpunished. 
Make  this  sacred  spot  an  arena,  and  if  you  succeed 
in  making  an  end  of  me  I  will  thank  you,  for  what 
made  life  worth  having  to  me,  you  have  already 
ruined  whether  or  no.  Only  come  on.  Or  perhaps 
you  think  it  easier  to  ruin  the  life  of  a  woman  than 
to  measure  your  strength  against  her  defender? 
Clutch  hold,  I  say,  clutch  hold,  or — " 

"  Or  you  will  fall  upon  me,"  said  Paulus,  whose 
arms  had  dropped  by  his  side  during  the  youth's 
address.  He  spoke  in  a  quite  altered  tone  of  indif- 
ference. "  Throw  yourself  upon  me,  and  do  with 
me  what  you  will ;  I  will  not  prevent  you.  Here  I 
shall  stand,  and  I  will  not  fight,  for  you  have  so  far 
hit  the  truth — this  holy  place  is  not  an  arena.  But 
the  Gaulish  lady  belongs  neither  to  you  nor  to  me, 
and  who  gives  you  a  claim — ? " 

"  Who  gives  me  a  right  over  her  ? "  interrupted 
Polykarp,  stepping  close  up  to  his  questioner  with 


HOMO   SUM.  251 

sparkling  eyes.  "  He  who  permits  the  worshipper 
to  speak  of  his  god.  Sirona  is  mine,  as  the  sun  and 
moon  and  stars  are  mine,  because  they  shed  a  beau- 
tiful light  on  my  murky  path.  My  life  is  mine — 
and  she  was  the  life  of  my  life,  and  therefore  I  say 
boldly,  and  would  say,  if  there  were  twenty  such  as 
Phcebicius  here,  she  belongs  to  me.  And  because  I 
regarded  her  as  my  own,  and  so  regard  her  still,  I 
hate  you  and  fling  my  scorn  in  your  teeth — you  are 
like  a  hungry  sheep  that  has  got  into  the  gardener's 
flower-bed,  and  stolen  from  the  stem  the  wonderful, 
lovely  flower  that  he  has  nurtured  with  care,  and 
that  only  blooms  once  in  a  hundred  years — like  a 
cat  that  has  sneaked  into  some  marble  hall,  and  that 
to  satisfy  its  greed  has  strangled  some  rare  and 
splendid  bird  that  a  traveller  has  brought  from  a 
distant  land.  But  you !  you  hypocritical  robber, 
who  disregard  your  own  body  with  beastly  pride, 
and  sacrifice  it  to  low  brutality — what  should  you 
know  of  the  magic  charm  of  beauty — that  daughter 
of  heaven,  that  can  touch  even  thoughtless  children, 
and  before  which  the  gods  themselves  v  do  homage  1 
I  have  a  right  to  Sirona ;  for  hide  her  where  you 
will — or  even  if  the  centurion  were  to  find  her,  and 
to  fetter  her  to  himself  with  chains  and  rivets  of 
brass — still  that  which  makes  her  the  noblest  work 
of  the  Most  High — the  image  of  her  beauty — lives 
in  no  one,  in  no  one  as  it  lives  in  me.  This  hand 
has  never  even  touched  your  victim — and  yet  God 
has  given  Sirona  to  no  man  as  he  has  given  her 
wholly  to  me,  for  to  no  man  can  she  be  what  she  is 


HOMO  SUM. 

to  me,  and  no  man  can  love  her  as  I  do !  She  has 
the  nature  of  an  angel,  and  the  heart  of  a  child ;  she 
is  without  spot,  and  as  pure  as  the  diamond,  or  the 
swan's  breast,  or  the  morning-dew  in  the  bosom  of 
a  rose.  And  though  she  had  let  you  into  her  house 
a  thousand  times,  and  though  my  father  even,  and 
my  own  mother,  and  every  one,  every  one  pointed 
at  her  and  condemned  her,  I  would  never  cease  to 
believe  in  her  purity.  It  is  you  who  have  brought 
her  to  shame ;  it  is  you — " 

"I  kept  silence  while  all  condemned  her,"  said 
Paulus  with  warmth,  "  for  I  believed  that  she  was 
guilty,  just  as  you  believe  that  I  am,  just  as  every 
one  that  is  bound  by  no  ties  of  love  is  more  ready  to 
believe  evil  than  good.  Now  I  know,  aye,  know  for 
certain,  that  we  did  the  poor  woman  an  injustice. 
If  the  splendor  of  the  lovely  dream,  that  you  call 
Sirona,  has  been  clouded  by  my  fault— 

"Clouded?  And  by  you?"  laughed  Polykarp. 
"  Can  the  toad  that  plunges  into  the  sea,  cloud  its 
shining  blue,  can  the  black  bat  that  flits  across  the 
night,  cloud  the  pure  light  of  the  full  moon  ?  " 

An  emotion  of  rage  again  shot  through  the  an- 
chorite's heart,  but  he  was  by  this  time  on  his  guard 
against  himself,  and  he  only  said  bitterly,  and  with 
hardly-won  composure, 

"  And  how  was  it  then  with  the  flower,  and  with 
the  bird,  that  were  destroyed  by  beasts  without  un- 
derstanding ?  I  fancy  you  meant  no  absent  third 
person  by  that  beast,  and  yet  now  you  declare  that 
it  is  not  within  my  power  even  to  throw  a  shadow 


HOMO   SUM.  253 

over  your  day-star !  You  see  you  contradict  your- 
self in  your  anger,  and  the  son  of  a  wise  man,  who 
himself  has  not  long  since  left  the  school  of  rhetoric, 
should  try  to  avoid  that.  You  might  regard  me 
with  less  hostility,  for  I  will  not  offend  you ;  nay, 
I  will  repay  your  evil  words  with  good — perhaps  the 
very  best  indeed  that  you  ever  heard  in  your  life. 
Sirona  is  a  worthy  and  innocent  woman,  and  at  the 
time  when  Phcebicius  came  out  to  seek  her,  I  had 
never  even  set  eyes  upon  her  nor  had  my  ears 
ever  heard  a  word  pass  her  lips." 

At  these  words  Polykarp's  threatening  manner 
changed,  and  feeling  at  once  incapable  of  understand- 
ing the  matter,  and  anxious  to  believe,  he  eagerly 
exclaimed, 

"  But  yet  the  sheep-skin  was  yours,  and  you  let 
yourself  be  thrashed  by  Phoebicius  without  defend- 
ing yourself." 

"  So  filthy  an  ape,"  said  Paulus,  imitating  Poly- 
karp's voice,  "needs  many  blows,  and  that  day  I 
could  not  venture  to  defend  myself  because — because 
—  But  that  is  no  concern  of  yours.  You  must 
subdue  your  curiosity  for  a  few  days  longer,  and 
then  it  may  easily  happen  that  the  man  whose  very 
aspect  makes  you  feel  dirty — the  bat,  the  toad — " 

"  Let  that  pass  now,"  cried  Polykarp.  "  Perhaps 
the  excitement  which  the  sight  of  you  stirred  up  in 
my  bruised  and  wounded  heart,  led  me  to  use  un- 
seemly language.  Now,  indeed,  I  see  that  your 
matted  hair  sits  round  a  well  featured  countenance. 
.Forgive  my  violent  and  unjust  attack,  I  was  beside 


254  HOMO   SUM. 

myself,  and  I  opened  my  whole  soul  to  you,  and  now 
that  you  know  how  it  is  with  me,  once  more  I  ask 
you,  where  is  Sirona?" 

Polykarp  looked  Paulus  in  the  face  with  anxious 
and  urgent  entreaty,  pointing  to  the  dog  as  much  as 
to  say,  "  You  must  know,  for  here  is  the  evidence." 

The  Alexandrian  hesitated  to  answer  ;  he  glanced 
by  chance  at  the  entrance  of  the  cave,  and  seeing 
the  gleam  of  Sirona's  white  robe  behind  the  palm- 
branches,  he  said  to  himself  that  if  Polykarp  lingered 
much  longer,  he  could  not  fail  to  discover  her — a 
consummation  to  be  avoided. 

There  were  many  reasons  which  might  have  made 
him  resolve  to  stand  in  the  way  of  a  meeting  be- 
tween the  lady  and  the  young  man,  but  not  one  of 
them  occurred  to  him,  and  though  he  did  not  even 
dream  that  a  feeling  akin  to  jealousy  had  begun  to 
influence  him,  still  he  was  conscious  that  it  was  his 
lively  repugnance  to  seeing  the  two  sink  into  each 
other's  arms  before  his  very  eyes,  that  prompted 
him  to  turn  shortly  round,  to  take  up  the  body  of 
the  little  dog,  and  to  say  to  the  inquirer, 

"  It  is  true,  I  do  know  where  she  is  hiding,  and 
when  the  time  comes  you  shall  know  it  too.  Now  I 
must  bury  the  animal,  and  if  you  will  you  can  help 
me." 

Without  waiting  for  any  objection  on  Polykarp's 
part,  he  hurried  from  stone  to  stone  up  to  the  pla- 
teau on  the  precipitous  edge  of  which  he  had  first 
seen  Sirona.  The  younger  man  followed  him  breath- 
lessly, and  only  joined  him  when  he  had  already 


HOMO   SUM.  255 

begun  to  dig  out  the  earth  with  his  hands  at  the 
foot  of  the  cliff.  Polykarp  was  now  standing  close 
to  the  anchorite,  and  repeated  his  question  with 
vehement  eagerness,  but  Paulus  did  not  look  up  from 
his  work,  and  only  said,  digging  faster  and  faster, 

"  Come  to  this  place  again  to-morrow,  and  then  it 
may  perhaps  be  possible  that  I  should  tell  you." 

"  You  think  to  put  me  off  with  that,"  cried  the 
lad.  "  Then  you  are  mistaken  in  me,  and  if  you 
cheat  me  with  your  honest-sounding  words  I  will — " 

But  he  did  not  end  his  threat,  for  a  clear  longing 
cry  distinctly  broke  the  silence  of  the  deserted 
mountain, 

"Polykarp — Polykarp."  It  sounded  nearer  and 
nearer,  and  the  words  had  a  magic  effect  on  him  for 
whose  ear  they  were  intended. 

With  his  head  erect  and  trembling  in  every  limb, 
the  young  man  listened  eagerly.  Then  he  cried  out, 
"  It  is  her  voice  !  I  am  coming,  Sirona,  I  am  com- 
ing." And  without  paying  any  heed  to  the  an- 
chorite, he  was  on  the  point  of  hurrying  off  to  meet 
her.  But  Paulus  placed  himself  close  in  front  of 
him,  and  said  sternly, 

"  You  stay  here." 

"  Out  of  my  way,"  shouted  Polykarp,  beside  him- 
self. "  She  is  calling  to  me  out  of  the  hole  where 
you  are  keeping  her — you  slanderer — you  cowardly 
liar !  Out  of  the  way  I  say !  You  will  not  ?  Then 
defend  yourself,  you  hideous  toad,  or  I  will  tread 
you  down,  if  my  foot  does  not  fear  to  be  soiled  with 
your  poison," 


256  HOMO   SUM. 

Up  to  this  moment  Paulus  had  stood  before  the 
young  man  with  outspread  arms,  motionless,  but 
immovable  as  an  oak-tree ;  now  Polykarp  first  hit 
him.  This  blow  shattered  the  anchorite's  patience, 
and.  no  longer  master  of  himself,  he  exclaimed, 
"  You  shall  answer  to  me  for  this ! "  and  before  a 
third  and  fourth  call  had  come  from  Sirona's  lips, 
he  had  grasped  the  artist's  slender  body,  and  with 
a  mighty  swing  he  flung  him  backwards  over  his 
own  broad  and  powerful  shoulders  on  to  the  stony 
ground. 

After  this  mad  act  he  stood  over  his  victim  with 
outstretched  legs,  folded  arms,  and  rolling  eyes,  as 
if  rooted  to  the  earth.  He  waited  till  Polykarp  had 
picked  himself  up,  and,  without  looking  round,  but 
pressing  his  hands  to  the  back  of  his  head,  had  tot- 
tered away  like  a  drunken  man. 

Paulus  looked  after  him  till  he  disappeared  over 
the  cliff  at  the  edge  of  the  level  ground  ;  but  he  did 
not  see  how  Polykarp  fell  senseless  to  the  ground 
with  a  stifled  cry,  not  far  from  the  very  spring 
whence  his  enemy  had  fetched  the  water  to  refresh 
Sirona's  parched  lips. 


HOMO  SUM.  257 


CHAPTEK  Y. 

"  SHE  will  attract  the  attention  of  Damianus  or 
Salathiel  or  one  of  the  others  up  there,"  thought 
Paulus  as  he  heard  Sirona's  call  once  more,  and, 
following  her  voice,  he  went  hastily  and  excitedly 
down  the  mountain-side. 

"  "We  shall  have  peace  for  to-day  at  any  rate  from 
that  audacious  fellow,"  muttered  he  to  himself, 
"  and  perhaps  to-morrow  too,  for  his  blue  bruises 
will  be  a  greeting  from  me.  But  how  difficult  it  is 
to  forget  what  we  have  once  known !  The  grip, 
with  which  I  flung  him,  I  learned — how  long  ago  ? 
— from  the  chief-gymnast  at  Delphi.  My  marrow 
is  not  yet  quite  dried  up,  and  that  I  will  prove  to 
the  boy  with  these  fists,  if  he  comes  back  with  three 
or  four  of  the  same  mettle." 

But  Paulus  had  not  long  to  indulge  in  such  wild 
thoughts,  for  on  the  way  to  the  cave  he  met  Sirona. 

"  Where  is  Polykarp  ?  "  she  called  out  from  afar. 

"  I  have  sent  him  home,"  he  answered. 

"  And  he  obeyed  you  ? "  she  asked  again. 

"I  gave  him  striking  reasons  for  doing  so,"  he 
replied  quickly. 

"But  he  will  return?" 

"  He  has  learned  enough  up  here  for  to-day.  "We 
'7 


2$8  HOMO   SUM. 

have  now  to  think  of  your  journey  to  Alexan- 
dria." - 

"But  it  seems  to  me,"  replied  Sirona,  blushing, 
"  that  I  am  safely  hidden  in  your  cave,  and  just  now 
you  yourself  said — 

"  I  warned  you  against  the  dangers  of  the  expedi- 
tion," interrupted  Paulus.  "But  since  that  it  has 
occurred  to  me  that  I  know  of  a  shelter,  and  of  a 
safe  protector  for  you.  There,  we  are  at  home 
again.  Now  go  into  the  cave,  for  very  probably 
some  one  may  have  heard  you  calling,  and  if 
other  anchorites  were  to  discover  you  here,  they 
would  compel  me  to  take  you  back  to  your  hus- 
band." 

"  I  will  go  directly,"  sighed  Sirona,  "  but  first 
explain  to  me — for  I  heard  all  that  you  said  to 
each  other — "  and  she  colored,  "how  it  happened 
that  Phoebicius  took  Hernias'  sheep-skin  for  yours, 
and  why  you  let  him  beat  you  without  giving  any 
explanation." 

"  Because  my  back  is  even  broader  than  that 
great  fellow's,"  replied  tiae  Alexandrian  quickly.  "  I 
will  tell  you  all  about  it  in  some  quiet  hour,  perhaps 
on  our  journey  to  Klysma.  Now  go  into  the  cave, 
or  you  may  spoil  everything.  I  know  too  what  you 
lack  most  since  you  heard  the  fair  words  of  the 
Senator's  son." 

"  Well — what  ?  "  asked  Sirona. 

"  A  mirror !  "  laughed  Paulus. 

"  How  much  you  are  mistaken  ! "  said  Sirona ; 
and  she  thought  to  herself — "  The  woman  that  Poly- 


HOMO   SUM.  259 

karp  looks  at  as  he  does  at  me,  does  not  need  a 
mirror." 

An  old  Jewish  merchant  lived  in  the  fishing-town 
on  the  western  declivit}7  of  the  mountain  ;  he  shipped 
the  charcoal  for  Egypt,  which  was  made  in  the 
valleys  of  the  peninsula  by  burning  the  sajal  acacia, 
and  he  had  formerly  supplied  fuel  for  the  drying-- 
room of  the  papyrus-factory  of  Paulus'  father.  He 
now  had  a  business  connection  with  his  brother,  and 
Paulus  himself  had  had  dealings  with  him.  He  was 
prudent  and  wealthy,  and  whenever  he  met  the  an- 
chorite, he  blamed  him  for  his  flight  from  the  world, 
and  implored  him  to  put  his  hospitality  to  the  test, 
and  to  command  his  resources  and  means  as  if  they 
were  his  own. 

This  man  was  now  to  find  a  boat,  and  to  provide 
the  means  of  flight  for  Sirona.  The  longer  Paulus 
thought  it  over,  the  more  indispensable  it  seemed  to 
him  that  he  should  himself  accompany  the  Gaulish 
lady  to  Alexandria,  and  in  his  own  person  find  her 
a  safe  shelter.  He  knew  that  he  was  free  to  dis- 
pose of  his  brother's  enormous  fortune — half  of  which 
in  fact  was  his — as  though  it  were  all  his  own,  and 
he  began  to  rejoice  in  his  possessions  for  the  first 
time  in  many  years.  Soon  he  was  occupied  in  think- 
ing of  the  furnishing  of  the  house,  which  he  intended 
to  assign  to  the  fair  Sirona.  At  first  he  thought 
of  a  simple  citizen's  dwelling,  but  by  degrees  he 
began  to  picture  the  house  intended  for  her  as 
fitted  with  shining  gold,  white  and  colored  marble, 


260  HOMO   SUM. 

many-colored  Syrian  carpets,  nay,  even  with  vain 
works  of  the  heathen,  with  statues,  and  a  luxurious 
bath.  In  increasing  unrest  he  wandered  from  rock 
to  rock,  and  many  times  as  he  went  up  and  down 
he  paused  in  front  of  the  cave  where  Sirona  was. 
Once  he  saw  her  light  robe,  and  its  conspicuous  gleam 
led  him  to  the  reflection,  that  it  would  be  imprudent 
to  conduct  her  to  the  humble  fishing-village  in  that 
dress.  If  he  meant  to  conceal  her  traces  from  the 
search  of  Phoebicius  and  Polykarp,  he  must  first 
provide  her  with  a  simple  dress,  and  a  veil  that  should 
hide  her  shining  hair  and  fair  face,  which  even  in 
the  capital  could  find  no  match. 

The  Amalekite,  from  whom  he  had  twice  bought 
some  goafs-milk  for  her,  lived  in  a  hut  which  Paulus 
could  easily  reach.  He  still  possessed  a  few  drachmas, 
and  with  these  he  could  purchase  what  he  needed 
from  the  wife  and  daughter  of  the  goat-herd.  Al- 
though the  sky  was  now  covered  with  mist  and  a  hot 
sweltering  south-wind  had  risen,  he  prepared  to  start^ 
at  once.  The  sun  was  no  longer  visible  though  its 
scorching  heat  could  be  felt,  but  Paulus  paid  no  heed 
to  this  sign  of  an  approaching  storm. 

Hastily,  and  with  so  little  attention  that  he  con- 
fused one  object  with  another  in  the  little  store-cellar, 
he  laid  some  bread,  a  knife,  and  some  dates  in  front 
of  the  entrance  to  the  cave,  called  out  to  his  guest 
that  he  should  soon  return,  and  hurried  at  a  rapid 
pace  up  the  mountain. 

Sirona  answered  him  with  a  gentle  word  of  fare- 
well, and  did  not  even  look  round  after  him,  for  she 


HOMO  SUM. 

was  glad  to  be  alone,  and  so  soon  as  the  sound 
of  his  step  had  died  away  she  gave  herself  up 
once  more  to  the  overwhelming  torrent  of  new 
and  deep  feelings  which  had  flooded  her  soul  ever 
since  she  had  heard  Polykarp's  ardent  hymn  of 
love. 

Paulus,  in  the  last  few  hours,  was  Menander  again, 
but  the  lonely  woman  in  the  cavern — the  cause  of 
this  transformation — the  wife  of  Phcebicius,  had 
undergone  an  even  greater  change  than  he.  She 
was  still  Sirona,  and  yet  not  Sirona. 

When  the  anchorite  had  commanded  her  to  retire 
into  the  cave  she  had  obeyed  him  willingly,  nay,  she 
would  have  withdrawn  even  without  his  desire,  and 
have  sought  for  solitude ;  for  she  felt  that  something 
mighty,  hitherto  unknown  to  her,  and  incomprehen- 
sible even  to  herself,  was  passing  in  her  soul,  and 
that  a  nameless  but  potent  something  had  grown  up 
in  her  heart,  had  struggled  free,  and  had  found  life 
and  motion  ;  a  something  that  was  strange,  and  yet 
precious  to  her,  frightening,  and  yet  sweet,  a  pain, 
and  yet  unspeakably  delightful.  An  emotion  such 
as  she  had  never  before  known  had  mastered  her, 
and  she  felt,  since  hearing  Polykarp's  speech,  as  if  a 
new  and  purer  blood  was  flowing  rapidly  through 
her  veins.  Every  nerve  quivered  like  the  leaves  of 
the  poplars  in  her  former  home  when  the  wind  blows 
down  to  meet  the  Rhone,  and  she  found  it  difficult  to 
follow  what  Paulus  said,  and  still  more  so  to  find  the 
right  answer  to  his  questions. 

As  soon  as  she  was  alone  she  sat  down  on  her  bed, 


262  HOMO   SUM. 

rested  her  elbows  on  her  knees,  and  her  head  in  her 
hand,  and  the  growing  and  surging  flood  of  her  pas- 
sion broke  out  in  an  abundant  stream  of  warm 
tears. 

She  had  never  wept  so  before ;  no  anguish,  no  bit- 
terness was  infused  into  the  sweet  refreshing  dew  of 
those  tears.  Fair  flowers  of  never  dreamed  of  splen- 
dor and  beauty  blossomed  in  the  heart  of  the  weep- 
ing woman,  and  when  at  length  her  tears  ceased, 
there  was  a  great  silence,  but  also  a  great  glory 
•within  her  and  around  her.  She  was  like  a  man 
who  has  grown  up  in  an  underground-room,  where 
no  light  of  day  can  ever  shine,  and  who  at  last  is 
allowed  to  look  at  the  blue  heavens,  at  the  splendor 
of  the  sun,  at  the  myriad  flowers  and  leaves  in  the 
green  woods,  and  on  the  meadows. 

She  was  wretched,  and  yet  a  happy  woman. 

"  That  is  love,"  were  the  words  that  her  heart  sang 
in  triumph,  and  as  her  memory  looked  back  on  the 
admirers  who  had  approached  her  in  Arelas  when 
she  was  still  little  more  than  a  child,  and  afterwards 
in  Rome,  with  tender  words  and  looks,  they  all 
appeared  like  phantom  forms  carrying  feeble  tapers, 
whose  light  paled  pitifully,  for  Polykarp  had  now 
come  on  the  scene,  bearing  the  very  sun  itself  in  his 
hands. 

"  They —and  he,"  she  murmured  to  herself,  and  she 
beheld  as  it  were  a  balance,  and  on  one  of  the  scales 
lay  the  homage  which  in  her  vain  fancy  she  had  so 
coveted.  It  was  of  no  more  weight  than  chaff,  and 
its  whole  mass  was  like  a  heap  of  straw,  which  flew 


HOMO   SUM.  263 

up  as  soon  as  Polykarp  laid  his  love — a  hundred- 
weight of  pure  gold,  in  the  other  scale. 

"  And  if  all  the  nations  and  kings  of  the  earth 
brought  their  treasures  together,"  thought  she,  "  and 
laid  them  at  my  feet,  they  could  not  make  me  as 
rich  as  he  has  made  me,  and  if  all  the  stars  were 
fused  into  one,  the  vast  globe  of  light  which  they 
would  form  could  not  shine  so  brightly  as  the  joy  that 
fills  my  soul.  Come  now  what  may,  I  will  never 
complain  after  that  hour  of  delight." 

Then  she  thought  over  each  of  her  former  meet- 
ings with  Polykarp,  and  remembered  that  he  had 
never  spoken  to  her  of  love.  What  must  it  not  have 
cost  him  to  control  himself  thus ;  and  a  great  tri- 
umphant joy  filled  her  heart  at  the  thought  that  she 
was  pure,  and  not  unworthy  of  him,  and  an  unutter- 
able sense  of  gratitude  rose  up  in  her  soul.  The  love 
she  bore  this  man  seemed  to  take  wings,  and  it 
spread  itself  over  the  common  life  and  aspect  of  the 
world,  and  rose  to  a  spirit  of  devotion.  "With  a  deep 
sigh  she  raised  her  eyes  and  hands  to  heaven,  and  in 
her  longing  to  prove  her  love  to  every  living  being, 
nay,  to  every  created  thing,  her  spirit  sought  the 
mighty  and  beneficent  Power  to  whom  she  owed 
such  exalted  happiness. 

In  her  youth  her  father  had  kept  her  very  strictly, 
but  still  he  had  allowed  her  to  go  through  the  streets 
of  the  town  with  her  young  companions,  wreathed 
with  flowers,  and  all  dressed  in  their  best,  in  the 
procession  of  maidens  at  the  feast  of  Yenus  of  Arelas, 
to  whom  all  the  women  of  her  native  town  were 


264  HOMO  SUM. 

wont  to  turn  with  prayers  and  sacrifices  when  their 
hearts  were  touched  by  love. 

Now  she  tried  to  pray  to  Yenus,  but  again  and 
again  the  wanton  jests  of  the  men  who  were  used  to 
accompany  the  maidens  came  into  her  mind,  and 
memories  of  how  she  herself  had  eagerly  listened 
for  the  only  two  frequent  cries  of  admiration,  and 
had  enticed  the  silent  with  a  glance,  or  thanked  the 
more  clamorous  with  a  smile.  To-day  certainly  she 
had  no  mind  for  such  sport,  and  she  recollected  the 
stern  words  which  had  fallen  from  Dorothea's  lips 
on  the  worship  of  Yenus,  when  she  had  once  told 
her  how  well  the  natives  of  Arelas  knew  how  to 
keep  their  feasts. 

And  Polykarp,  whose  heart  was  nevertheless  so 
full  of  love,  he  no  doubt  thought  like  his  mother, 
and  she  pictured  him  as  she  had  frequently  seen  him 
following  his  parents  by  the  side  of  his  sister  Mar- 
thana — often  hand  in  hand  with  her — as  they  went  to 
church.  The  Senator's  son  had  always  had  a  kindly 
glance  for  her,  excepting  when  he  was  one  of  this 
procession  to  the  temple  of  the  God  of  whom  they 
said  that  He  was  love  itself,  and  whose  votaries  in- 
deed were  not  poor  in  love ;  for  in  Petrus'  house,  if 
anywhere,  all  hearts  were  united  by  a  tender  af- 
fection. It  then  occurred  to  her  that  Paulus  had 
just  now  advised  her  to  turn  to  the  crucified  God  of 
the  Christians,  who  was  full  of  an  equal  and  divine 
love  to  all  men.  To  him  Polykarp  also  prayed  — 
was  praying  perhaps  at  this  very  hour ;  and  if  she 
now  did  the  same  her  prayers  would  ascend  together 


HOMO  SUM.  265 

with  his,  and  so  she  might  be  in  some  sort  one  with 
that  beloved  friend,  from  whom  everything  else 
conspired  to  part  her. 

She  knelt  down  and  folded  her  hands,  as  she  had 
so  often  seen  Christians  do,  and  she  reflected  on  the 
torments  that  the  poor  Man,  who  hung  with  pierced 
hands  on  the  cross,  had  so  meekly  endured,  though 
He  suffered  innocently ;  she  felt  the  deepest  pity 
for  Him,  and  softly  said  to  herself,  as  she  raised  her 
eyes  to  the  low  roof  of  her  cave-dwelling, 

. "  Thou  poor  good  Son  of  God,  Thou  knowest 
what  it  is  when  all  men  condemn  us  unjustly,  and 
surely,  Thou  canst  understand  when  I  say  to  Thee 
how  sore  my  heart  is?  And  they  say  too,  that  of 
all  hearts  Thine  is  the  most  loving,  and  so  Thou 
wilt  know  how  it  is  that,  in  spite  of  all  my  misery, 
it  still  seems  to  me  that  I  am  a  happy  woman.  The 
very  breath  of  a  God  must  be  rapture,  and  that 
Thou  too  must  have  learned  when  they  tortured  and 
mocked  Thee,  for  Thou  hast  suffered  out  of  love. 
They  say,  that  Thou  wast  wholly  pure  and  per- 
fectly sinless.  Now  I — I  have  committed  many 
follies,  but  not  a  sin — a  real  sin — no,  indeed,  I  have 
not ;  and  Thou  must  know  it,  for  Thou  art  a  God, 
and  knowest  the  past,  and  canst  read  hearts.  And 
indeed,  I  also  would  fain  remain  innocent,  and  yet 
how  can  that  be  when  I  cannot  help  being  devoted 
to  Polykarp,  and  yet  I  am  another  man's  wife.  But 
am  I  indeed  the  true  and  lawful  wife  of  that  horri- 
ble wretch  who  sold  me  to  another  ?  He  is  as  far 
from  my  heart — as  far  as  if  I  had  never  seen  him 


266  HOMO  SUM. 

with  these  eyes.  And  yet — believe  me — I  wish  him 
no  ill,  and  I  will  be  quite  content,  if  only  I  need 
never  go  back  to  him. 

"  When  I  was  a  child,  I  was  afraid  of  frogs ;  my 
brothers  and  sister  knew  it,  and  once  my  brother 
Licinius  laid  a  large  one,  that  he  had  caught,  on  my 
bare  neck.  I  started,  and  shuddered,  and  screamed 
out  loud,  for  it  was  so  hideously  cold  and  damp — I 
cannot  express  it.  And  that  is  exactly  how  I  have 
always  felt  since  those  days  in  Home  whenever 
Phoebicius  touched  me,  and  yet  I  dared  not  scream 
when  he  did. 

"  But  Polykarp !  oh !  would  that  he  were  here, 
and  might  only  grasp  my  hand.  m  He  said  I  was  his 
own,  and  yet  I  have  never  encouraged  him.  But 
now !  if  a  danger  threatened  him  or  a  sorrow,  and 
if  by  any  means  I  could  save  him  from  it,  indeed — 
indeed — though  I  never  could  bear  pain  well,  and 
am  afraid  of  death,  I  would  let  them  nail  me  to  a 
cross  for  him,  as  Thou  wast  crucified  for  us  all. 

"  But  then  he  must  know  that  I  had  died  for  him, 
and  if  he  looked  into  my  dying  eyes  with  his  strange, 
deep  gaze,  I  would  tell  him  that  it  is  to  him  that  I 
owe  a  love  so  great  that  it  is  a  thing  altogether  dif- 
ferent and  higher  than  any  love  I  have  ever  before 
seen.  And  a  feeling  that  is  so  far  above  all  measure 
of  what  ordinary  mortals  experience,  it  seems  to  me, 
must  be  divine.  Can  such  love  be  wrong  ?  I  know 
not ;  but  Thou  knowest,  and  Thou,  whom  they  name 
the  Good  Shepherd,  lead  Thou  us — each  apart  from 
the  other,  if  it  be  best  so  for  him — but  yet,  if  it  be 


HOMO   SUM.  267 

possible,  unite  us  once  more,  if  it  be  only  for  one 
single  hour.  If  only  he  could  know  that  I  am  not 
wicked,  and  that  poor  Sirona  would  willingly  belong 
to  him,  and  to  no  other,  then  I  would  be  ready  to 
die.  O  Thou  good,  kind  Shepherd,  take  me  too  into 
Thy  flock,  and  guide  me." 

Thus  prayed  Sirona,  and  before  her  fancy  there 
floated  the  image  of  a  lovely  and  loving  youthful 
form ;  she  had  seen  the  original  in  the  model  for 
Polykarp's  noble  work,  and  she  had  not  forgotten 
the  exquisite  details  of  the  face.  It  seemed  to  her 
as  well  known  and  familiar  as  if  she  had  known — what 
in  fact  she  could  not  even  guess — that  she  herself 
had  had  some  share  in  the  success  of  the  work. 

The  love  which  unites  two  hearts  is  like  the  ocean 
of  Homer  which  encircles  both  halves  of  the  earth. 
It  flows  and  rolls  on.  "Where  shall  we  seek  its 
source — here  or  there — who  can  tell  ? 

It  was  dame  Dorothea  who  in  her  motherly  pride 
had  led  the  Gaulish  lady  into  her  son's  workshop. 
Sirona  thought  of  her  and  her  husband  and  her  house, 
where  over  the  door  a  motto  was  carved  in  the  stone 
which  she  had  seen  every  morning  from  her  sleeping- 
room.  She  could  not  read  Greek,  but  Polykarp's 
sister,  Marthana,  had  more  than  once  told  her  what  it 
meant.  "  Commit  thy  way  to  the  Lord,  and  put 
thy  trust  in  Him,"  ran  the  inscription,  and  she  re- 
peated it  to  herself  again  and  again,  and  then 
drew  fancy-pictures  of  the  future  in  smiling  day- 
dreams, which  by  degrees  assumed  sharper  outlines 
and  brighter  colors. 


268  HOMO   SUM. 

She  saw  herself  united  to  Polykarp,  and  as  the 
daughter  of  Petrus  and  Dorothea,  at  home  in  the 
Senator's  house ;  she  had  a  right  now  to  the  chil- 
dren who  loved  her,  and  who  were  so  dear  to  her ; 
she  helped  the  deaconess  in  all  her  labors  and  won 
praise,  and  looks  of  approval.  She  had  learned  to 
use  her  hands  in  her  father's  house  and  now  she 
could  show  what  she  could  do  ;  Polykarp  even  gazed 
at  her  with  surprise  and  admiration,  and  said  that 
she  was  as  clever  as  she  was  beautiful,  and  prom- 
ised to  become  a  second  Dorothea.  She  went  with 
him  into  his  workshop,  and  there  arranged  all  the 
things  that  lay  about  in  confusion,  and  dusted  it, 
while  he  followed  her  every  movement  with  his  gaze, 
and  at  last  stood  before  her,  his  arms  wide — wide 
open  to  clasp  her. 

She  started,  and  pressed  her  hands  over  her  eyes, 
and  flung  herself  loving  and  beloved  on  his  breast, 
and  would  have  thrown  her  arms  round  his  neck,  while 
her  hot  tears  flowed — but  the  sweet  vision  was  sud- 
denly shattered,  for  a  swift  flash  of  light  pierced  the 
gloom  of  the  cavern,  and  immediately  after  she  heard 
the  heavy  roll  of  the  thunder-clap,  dulled  by  the 
rocky  walls  of  her  dwelling. 

Completely  recalled  to  actuality  she  listened  for  a 
moment,  and  then  stepped  to  the  entrance  of  the 
cave.  It  was  already  dusk,  and  heavy  rain-drops 
were  falling  from  the  dark  clouds  which  seemed  to 
shroud  the  mountain  peaks  in  a  vast  veil  of  black 
crape.  Paulus  was  nowhere  to  be  seen,  but  there 
stood  the  food  he  had  prepared  for  her.  She  had 


HOMO  SUM.  269 

eaten  nothing  since  her  breakfast,  and  she  now  tried 
to  drink  the  milk,  but  it  had  curdled  and  was  not  fit 
to  use ;  a  small  bit  of  bread  and  a  few  dates  quite  sat- 
isfied her. 

As  the  lightning  and  thunder  began  to  follow 
each  other  more  and  more  quickly,  and  the  darkness 
fast  grew  deeper,  a  great  fear  fell  upon  her ;  she 
pushed  the  food  on  one  side,  and  looked  up  to  the 
mountain  where  the  peaks  were  now  wholly  veiled 
in  night,  now  seemed  afloat  in  a  sea  of  flame,  and 
more  distinctly  visible  than  by  daylight.  Again 
and  again  a  forked  flash  like  a  saw-blade  of  fire  cut 
through  the  black  curtain  of  cloud  with  terrific  swift- 
ness, again  and  again  the  thunder  sounded  like  a 
blast  of  trumpets  through  the  silent  wilderness,  and 
multiplied  itself,  clattering,  growling,  roaring,  and 
echoing  from  rock  to  rock.  Light  and  sound  at  last 
seemed  to  be  hurled  from  Heaven  together,  and  the 
very  rock  in  which  her  cave  was  formed  quaked. 

Crushed  and  trembling  she  drew  back  into  the 
inmost  depth  of  her  rocky-chamber,  starting  at  each 
flash  that  illumined  the  darkness. 

At  length  they  occurred  at  longer  intervals,  the 
thunder  lost  its  appalling  fury,  and  as  the  wind 
drove  the  storm  farther  and  farther  to  the  south- 
wards, at  last  it  wholly  died  away. 


2/O  HOMO  SUM. 


CHAPTER  VI. 

IT  was  quite  dark  in  Sirona's  cavern,  fearfully 
dark,  and  the  blacker  grew  the  night  which  shrouded 
her,  the  more  her  terror  increased.  From  time  to 
time  she  shut  her  eyes  as  tightly  as  she  could,  for 
she  fancied  she  could  see  a  crimson  glare,  and  she 
longed  for  light  in  that  hour  as  a  drowning  man 
longs  for  the  shore.  Dark  forebodings  of  every 
kind  oppressed  her  soul. 

What  if  Paulus  had  abandoned  her,  and  had  left 
her  to  her  fate  ?  Or  if  Polykarp  should  have  been 
searching  for  her  on  the  mountain  in  this  storm,  and 
in  the  darkness  should  have  fallen  into  some  abyss, 
or  have  been  struck  by  the  lightning  ?  Suppose  the 
mass  of  rock  that  overhung  the  entrance  to  the  cave 
should  have  been  loosened  in  the  storm,  and  should 
fall,  and  bar  her  exit  to  the  open  air?  Then  she 
would  be  buried  alive,  and  she  must  perish  alone, 
without  seeing  him  whom  she  loved  once  more,  or 
telling  him  that  she  had  not  been  unworthy  of  his 
trust  in  her. 

Cruehy  tormented  by  such  thoughts  as  these,  she 
dragged  herself  up  and  felt  her  way  out  into  the  air 
and  wind,  for  she  could  no  longer  hold  out  in  the 
gloomy  solitude  and  fearful  darkness.  She  had 


HOMO   SUM.  271 

hardly  reached  the  mouth  of  the  cave,  when  she 
heard  steps  approaching  her  lurking  place,  and  again 
she  shrank  back.  Who  was  it  that  could  venture  in 
this  pitch-dark  night  to  climb  from  rock  to  rock? 
Was  it  Paulus  returning  ?  Was  it  he — was  it  Poly- 
karp  seeking  her  ? 

She  felt  intoxicated  ;  she  pressed  her  hands  to  her 
heart,  and  longed  to  cry  out,  but  she  dared  not,  and 
her  tongue  refused  its  office.  She  listened  with  the 
tension  of  terror  to  the  sounds  of  the  steps  which 
came  straight  towards  her  nearer  and  nearer,  then 
the  wanderer  perceived  the  faint  gleam  of  her  white 
dress,  and  called  out  to  her.  It  was  Paulus. 

She  drew  a  deep  breath  of  relief  when  she  recog- 
nized his  voice,  and  answered  his  call. 

"In  such  weather  as  this,"  said  the  anchorite,  "  it 
is  better  to  be  within  than  without,  it  seems  to  me, 
for  it  is  not  particularly  pleasant  out  here,  so  far  as 
I  have  found." 

"  But  it  has  been  frightful  here  inside  the  cave 
too,"  Sirona  answered,  "  I  have  been  so  dreadfully 
frightened,  I  was  so  lonely  in  the  horrible  darkness. 
If  only  I  had  had  my  little  dog  with  me,  it  would 
at  least  have  been  a  living  being." 

"  I  have  made  haste  as  well  as  I  could,"  inter- 
rupted Paulus.  "  The  paths  are  not  so  smooth  here 
as  the  Kanopic  road  in  Alexandria,  and  as  I  have 
not  three  necks  like  Cerberus,  who  lies  at  the  feet  of 
Serapis,  it  would  have  been  wiser  of  me  to  return  to 
you  a  little  more  leisurely.  The  storm-bird  has 
swallowed  up  all  the  stars  as  if  they  were  flies,  and 


2/2  HOMO  SUM. 

the  poor  old  mountain  is  so  grieved  at  it,  that  streams 
of  tears  are  everywhere  flowing  over  his  stony 
cheeks.  It  is  wet  even  here.  Now  go  back  into 
the  cave,  and  let  me  lay  this  that  I  have  got  here 
for  you  in  my  arms,  in  the  dry  passage.  I  bring 
you  good  news ;  to-morrow  evening,  when  it  is 
growing  dusk,  we  start.  I  have  found  out  a  vessel 
which  will  convey  us  to  Klysma,  and  from  thence  I 
myself  will  conduct  you  to  Alexandria.  In  the 
sheep-skin  here  you  will  find  the  dress  and  veil  of 
an  Amalekite  woman,  and  if  your  traces  are  to  be 
kept  hidden  from  Phcebicius,  you  must  accommodate 
yourself  to  this  disguise ;  for  if  the  people  down 
there  were  to  see  you  as  I  saw  you:  to-day,  they 
would  think  that  Aphrodite  herself  had  risen  from 
the  sea,  and  the  report  of  the  fair-haired  beauty 
that  had  appeared  among  them  would  soon  spread 
even  to  the  oasis." 

"  But  it  seems  to  me  that  I  am  well  hidden  here," 
replied  Sirona.  "  I  am  afraid  of  a  sea-voyage,  and 
even  if  we  succeeded  in  reaching  Alexandria  with- 
out impediment,  still  I  do  not  know — " 

"  It  shall  be  my  business  to  provide  for  you  there," 
Paulus  interrupted  with  a  decision  that  was  almost 
boastful,  and  that  somewhat  disturbed  Sirona. 
"  You  know  the  fable  of  the  ass  in  the  lion's  skin, 
but  there  are  lions  who  wear  the  skin  of  an  ass  on 
their  shoulders — or  of  a  sheep,  it  comes  to  the  same 
thing.  Yesterday  you  were  speaking  of  the  splen- 
did palaces  of  the  citizens,  and  lauding  the  happiness 
of  their  owners.  You  shall  dwell  in  one  of  those 


HOMO   SUM.  273 

marble  houses,  and  rule  it  as  its  mistress,  and  it 
shall  be  my  care  to  procure  you  slaves,  and  litter- 
bearers,  and  a  carriage  with  four  mules.  Do  not 
doubt  my  word,  for  I  am  promising  nothing  that  I 
cannot  perform.  The  rain  is  ceasing,  and  I  will  try 
to  light  a  fire.  You  want  nothing  more  to  eat? 
Well  then,  I  will  wish  you  good-night.  The  rest 
will  all  do  to-morrow." 

Sirona  had  listened  in  astonishment  to  the  anch- 
orite's promises. 

How  often  had  she  envied  those  who  possessed 
all  that  her  strange  protector  now  promised  her — 
and  now  it  had  not  the  smallest  charm  for  her ;  and, 
fully  determined  in  any  case  not  to  follow  Paulus, 
whom  she  began  to  distrust,  she  replied,  as  she  coldly 
returned  his  greeting,  "  There  are  many  hours  yet 
before  to-morrow  evening  in  which  we  can  discuss 
everything." 

While  Paulus  was  with  great  difficulty  rekindling 
the  fire,  she  was  once  more  alone,  and  again  she  began 
to  be  alarmed  in  the  dark  cavern. 

She  called  the  Alexandrian.  "  The  darkness 
terrifies  me  so,"  she  said.  "  You  still  had  some  oil 
in  the  jug  this  morning ;  perhaps  you  may  be  able 
to  contrive  a  little  lamp  for  me  ;  it  is  so  fearful  to 
stay  here  in  the  dark." 

Paulus  at  once  took  a  shard,  tore  a  strip  from  his 
tattered  coat,  t^wisted  it  together,  and  laid  it  for  a 
wick  in  the  greasy  fluid,  lighted  it  at  the  slowly  re- 
viving fire,  and  putting  this  more  than  simple  light 
in  Sirona's  hand?  he  said. 


274  HOMO  SUM. 

"  It  will  serve  its  purpose ;  in  Alexandria  I  will 
see  that  you  have  lamps  which  give  more  light,  and 
which  are  made  by  a  better  artist." 

Sirona  placed  the  lamp  in  a  hollow  in  the  rocky 
wall  at  the  head  of  her  bed,  and  then  lay  down  to 
rest. 

Light  scares  away  wild  beasts  and  fear  too  from 
the  resting-place  of  man,  and  it  kept  terrifying 
thoughts  far  away  from  the  Gaulish  woman. 

She  contemplated  her  situation  clearly  and  calmly, 
and  quite  decided  that  she  would  neither  quit  the 
cave,  nor  entrust  herself  to  the  anchorite,  till  she  had 
once  more  seen  and  spoken  to  Polykarp.  He  no 
doubt  knew  where  to  seek  her,  and  certainly,  she 
thought,  he  would  by  this  time  have  returned,  if  the 
storm  and  the  starless  night  had  not  rendered  it  an 
impossibility  to  come  up  the  mountain  from  the 
oasis. 

"  To-morrow  I  shall  see  him  again,  and  then  I  will 
open  my  heart  to  him,  and  he  shall  read  my  soul 
like  a  book,  and  on  every  page,  and  in  every  line  he 
will  find  his  own  name.  And  I  will  tell  him  too 
that  I  have  prayed  to  his  '  Good  Shepherd,'  and  how 
much  good  it  has  done  me,  and  that  I  will  be  a 
Christian  like  his  sister  Marthana  and  his  mother. 
Dorothea  will  be  glad  indeed  when  she  hears  it,  and 
she  at  any  rate  cannot  have  thought  that  I  was 
wicked>  for  she  always  loved  me,  and  the  children — 
the  children — " 

The  bright  crowd  of  merry  faces  came  smiling  in 
upon  her  fancy,  and  her  thoughts  passed  insensibly 


HOMO   SUM.  2/5 

into  dreams ;  kindly  sleep  touched  her  heart  with 
its  gentle  hand,  and  its  breath  swept  every  shadow 
of  trouble  from  her  soul.  She  slept,  smiling  and  un- 
troubled as  a  child  whose  eyes  some  guardian  angel 
softly  kisses,  while  her  strange  protector  now  turned 
the  flickering  wood  on  the  damp  hearth  and  with  a 
reddening  face  blew  up  the  dying  charcoal  fire  and 
again  walked  restlessly  up  and  down,  and  paused 
each  time  he  passed  the  entrance  to  the  cave,  to 
throw  a  longing  glance  at  the  light  which  shone  out 
from  Sirona's  sleeping  room. 

Since  the  moment  when  he  had  flung  Polykarp 
to  the  ground,  Paulus  had  not  succeeded  in  recover- 
ing his  self-command ;  not  for  a  moment  had  he 
regretted  the  deed,  for  the  reflection  had  never 
occurred  to  him,  that  a  fall  on  the  stony  soil  of  the 
Sacred  Mountain,  which  was  as  hard  as  iron,  must 
hurt  more  than  a  fall  on  the  sand  of  the  arena. 

"  The  impudent  fellow,"  thought  he,  "  richly  de- 
served what  he  got.  "Who  gave  him  a  better  right 
over  Sirona  than  he,  Paulus  himself,  had — he  who 
had  saved  her  life,  and  had  taken  it  upon  himself 
to  protect  her  ? " 

Her  great  beauty  had  charmed  him  from  the  first 
moment  of  their  meeting,  but  no  impure  thought 
stirred  his  heart  as  he  gazed  at  her  with  delight,  and 
listened  with  emotion  to  her  childlike  talk.  It  was 
the  hct  torrent  of  Polykarp's  words  that  had  first 
thrown  the  spark  into  his  soul,  which  jealousy  and 
the  dread  of  having  to  abandon  Sirona  to  another, 
had  soon  fanned  into  a  consuming  flame.  He  would 


2/6  HOMO   SUM. 

not  give  up  this  woman,  lie  would  continue  to  care 
for  her  every  need,  she  should  owe  everything  to 
to  him,  and  to  him  only.  And  so,  without  reserve, 
he  devoted  himself  body  and  soul  to  the  preparations 
for  her  flight.  The  hot  breath  of  the  storm,  the 
thunder  and  lightning,  torrents  of  rain,  and  black- 
ness of  night  could  not  delay  him,  while  he  leaped 
from  rock  to  rock,  feeling  his  way — soaked  through, 
weary  and  in  peril ;  he  thought  only  of  her,  and  of 
how  he  could  most  safely  carry  her  to  Alexandria, 
and  then  surround  her  with  all  that  could  charm,  a 
woman's  taste.  Nothing — nothing  did  he  desire  for 
himself,  and  all  that  he  dreamed  of  and  planned 
turned  only  and  exclusively  on  the  pleasure  which  he 
might  afford  her.  When  he  had  prepared  and  lighted 
the  lamp  for  her  he  saw  her  again,  and  was  startled 
at  the  beautv  of  the  face  that  the  trembling  flame  re- 

V 

vealed.  He  could  observe  her  a  few  seconds  only, 
and  then  she  had  vanished,  and  he  must  remain  alone 
in  the  darkness  and  the  rain.  He  walked  restlessly 
up  and  down,  and  an  agonizing  longing  once  more 
to  see  her  face  lighted  up  by  the  pale  flame,  and  the 
white  arm  that  she  had  held  out  to  take  the  lamp, 
grew  more  and  more  strong  in  him  and  accelerated 
the  pulses  of  his  throbbing  heart.  As  often  as  he 
passed  the  cave,  and  observed  the  glimmer  of  light 
that  came  from  her  room,  he  felt  prompted  and 
urged  to  slip  in,  and  to  gaze  on  her  once  more.  He 
never  once  thought  of  prayer  and  scourging,  his  old 
means  of  grace,  he  sought  rather  for  a  reason  that 
might  serve  him  as  an  excuse  if  he  went  in,  and  it 


HOMO   SUM.  277 

struck  him  that  it  was  cold,  and  that  a  sheep-skin 
was  lying  in  the  cavern.  He  would  fetch  it,  in  spite 
of  his  vow  never  to  wear  a  sheep-skin  again ;  and 
supposing  he  were  thus  enabled  to  see  her,  what 
next? 

When  he  had  stepped  across  the  threshold,  an  in- 
ward voice  warned  him  to  return,  and  told  him  that 
he  must  be  treading  the  path  of  unrighteousness,  for 
that  he  was  stealing  in  on  tiptoe  like  a  thief  ;  but 
the  excuse  was  ready  at  once.  "  That  is  for  fear  of 
waking  her,  if  she  is  asleep." 

And  now  all  farther  reflection  was  silenced  for  he 
had  already  reached  the  spot'  where,  at  the  end  of 
the  rocky  passage,  the  cave  widened  into  her  sleeping- 
room  ;  there  she  lay  on  her  hard  couch,  sunk  in 
slumber  and  enchantingly  fair. 

A  deep  gloom  reigned  around,  and  the  feeble  light 
of  the  little  lamp  lighted  up  only  a  small  portion  of 
the  dismal  chamber,  but  the  head,  throat,  and  arms 
that  it  illuminated  seemed  to  shine  with  a  light  of 
their  own  that  enhanced  and  consecrated  the  light 
of  the  feeble  flame.  Paulus  fell  breathless  on  his 
knees,  and  fixed  his  eyes  with  growing  eagerness  on 
the  graceful  form  of  the  sleeper. 

Sirona  was  dreaming;  her  head,  veiled  in  her 
golden  hair,  rested  on  a  high  pillow  of  herbs,  and  her 
delicately  rosy  face  was  turned  up  to  the  vault  of 
the  cave  ;  her  half-closed  lips  moved  gently,  and  now 
she  moved  her  bent  arm  and  her  white  hand,  on  which 
the  light  of  the  lamp  fell,  and  which  rested  half  on 
her  forehead  and  half  on  her  shining  hair. 


278  HOMO  SUM. 

"  Is  she  saying  anything  ? "  asked  Paulus  of  him- 
self, and  he  pressed  his  brow  against  a  projection  of 
the  rock  as  tightly  as  if  he  would  stem  the  rapid 
rush  of  his  blood  that  it  might  not  overwhelm  his 
bewildered  brain. 

A  gain  she  moved  her  lips.  Had  she  indeed  spoken  ? 
Had  she  perhaps  called  him  ? 

That  could  not  be,  for  she  still  slept ;  but  he  wished 
to  believe  it — and  he  would  believe  it,  and  he  stole 
nearer  to  her  and  nearer,  and  bent  over  her,  and 
listened — while  his  own  strength  failed  him  even  to 
draw  a  breath — listened  to  the  soft  regular  breathing 
that  heaved  her  bosom.  No  longer  master  of  him- 
self he  touched  her  white  arm  with  his  bearded  lips 
and  she  drew  it  back  in  her  sleep,  then  his  gaze  fell 
on  her  parted  lips  and  the  pearly  teeth  that  shone 
between  them,  and  a  mad  longing  to  kiss  them  came 
irresistibly  over  him.  He  bent  trembling  over  her, 
and  was  on  the  point  of  gratifying  his  impulse  when, 
as  if  startled  by  a  sudden  apparition,  he  drew  back, 
and  raised  his  eyes  from  the  rosy  lips  to  the  hand 
that  rested  on  the  sleeper's  brow. 

The  lamp-light  played  on  a  golden  ring  on  Sirona's 
finger,  and  shone  brightly  on  an  onyx  on  which  was 
engraved  an  image  of  Tyche,  the  tutelary  goddess 
of  Antioch,  with  a  sphere  upon  her  head,  and  bearing 
Amalthea's  horn  in  her  hand. 

A  new  and  strange  emotion  took  possession  of 
the  anchorite  at  the  sight  of  this  stone.  With 
trembling  hands  he  felt  in  the  breast  of  his  torn 
garment,  and  presently  drew  forth  a  small  iron 


HOMO  SUM.  279 

crucifix  and  the  ring  that  he  had  taken  from  the 
cold  hand  of  Hennas'  mother.  In  the  golden  circlet 
was  set  an  onyx,  on  which  precisely  the  same  de- 
vice was  visible  as  that  on  Sirona's  hand.  The 
string  with  its  precious  jewel  fell  from  his  grasp,  he 
clutched  his  matted  hair  with  both  hands,  groaned 
deeply,  and  repeated  again  and  again,  as  though  to 
crave  forgiveness,  the  name  of  "  Magdalen." 

Then  he  called  Sirona  in  a  loud  voice,  and  as  she 
awoke  excessively  startled,  he  asked  her  in  urgent 
tones, 

"  Who  gave  you  that  ring  ? " 

"  It  was  a  present  from  Phoebicius,"  replied  she. 
"  He  said  he  had  had  it  given  to  him  many  years 
since  in  Antioch,  and  that  it  had  been  engraved  by 
a  great  artist.  But  I  do  not  want  it  any  more,  and 
if  you  like  to  have  it  you  may." 

"  Throw  it  away !  "  exclaimed  Paulus,  "  it  will 
bring  you  nothing  but  misfortune."  Then  he  col- 
lected himself,  went  out  into  the  air  with  his  head 
sunk  on  his  breast,  and  there,  throwing  himself 
down  on  the  wet  stones  by  the  hearth,  he  cried  out, 

"  Magdalen  !  dearest  and  purest !  You,  when  you 
ceased  to  be  Glycera,  became  a  saintly  martyr,  and 
found  the  road  to  Heaven;  I  too  had  my  day  of 
Damascus — of  revelation  and  conversion — and  I 
dared  to  call  myself  by  the  name  of  Paulus — and 
now — now  ? " 

Plunged  in  despair  he  beat  his  forehead,  groaning 
out,  "  All,  all  in  vain  ! " 


28O  HOMO  SUM. 


CHAPTEK  VII. 

COMMON  natures  can  only  be  lightly  touched  by 
the  immeasurable  depth  of  anguish  that  is  experienced 
by  a  soul  that  despairs  of  itself  ;  but  the  more  heavily 
the  blow  of  such  suffering  falls,  the  more  surely 
does  it  work  with  purifying  power  on  him  who  has 
to  taste  of  that  cup. 

Paulus  thought  no  more  of  the  fair,  sleeping 
woman ;  tortured  by  acute  remorse  he  lay  on  the 
hard  stones,  feeling  that  he  had  striven  in  vain. 
"When  he  had  taken  Hernias'  sin  and  punishment 
and  disgrace  upon  himself,  it  had  seemed  to  him  that 
he  was  treading  in  the  very  footsteps  of  the  Saviour. 
And  now  ? — He  felt  like  one  who,  while  running  for 
a  prize,  stumbles  over  a  stone  and  grovels  in  the 
sand  when  he  is  already  close  to  the  goal. 

"  God  sees  the  will  and  not  the  deed,"  he  muttered 
to  himself.  "  What  I  did  wrong  with  regard  to 
Sirona — or  what  I  did  not  do — that  matters  not. 
When  I  leaned  over  her,  I  had  fallen  utterly  and 
entirely  into  the  power  of  the  evil  one,  and  was  an 
ally  of  the  deadliest  enemy  of  Him  to  whom  I  had 
dedicated  my  life  and  soul.  Of  what  avail  was  my 
flight  from  the  world,  and  my  useless  sojourn  in  the 
desert  ?  He  who  always  keeps  out  of  the  way  of 


HOMO  SUM.  28l 

the  battle  can  easily  boast  of  being  unconquered  to 
the  end — but  is  he  therefore  a  hero  ?  The  palm  be- 
longs to  him  who  in  the  midst  of  the  struggles  and 
affairs  of  the  world  clings  to  the  Heavenward  road, 
and  never  lets  himself  be  diverted  from  it ;  but  as 
for  me  who  walk  here  alone,  a  woman  and  a  boy 
cross  my  path,  and  one  threatens  and  the  other 
beckons  to  me,  and  I  forget  my  aim  and  stumble  into 
the  bog  of  iniquity.  And  so  I  cannot  find — no, 
here  I  cannot  find  what  I  strive  after.  But  how 
then — how  ?  Enlighten  me,  O  Lord,  and  reveal  to 
me  what  I  must  do." 

Thus  thinking  he  rose,  knelt  down,  and  prayed 
fervently ;  when  at  last  he  came  to  the  '  Amen,'  his 
head  was  burning,  and  his  tongue  parched. 

The  clouds  had  parted,  though  they  still  hung  in 
black  masses  in  the  west ;  from  time  to  time  gleams 
of  lightning  shone  luridly  on  the  horizon  and  lighted 
up  the  jagged  peak  of  mountain  with  a  flare ;  the 
moon  had  risen,  but  its  waning  disk  was  frequently 
obscured  by  dark  driving  masses  of  cloud  ;  blinding 
flashes,  tender  light,  and  utter  darkness  were  alter- 
nating with  bewildering  rapidity,  when  Paulus  at 
last  collected  himself,  and  went  down  to  the  spring 
to  drink,  and  to  cool  his  brow  in  the  fresh  water. 
Striding  from  stone  to  stone  he  told  himself,  that 
ere  he  could  begin  a  new  life,  he  must  do  penance — 
some  heavy  penance  ;  but  what  was  it  to  be  ?  He 
was  standing  at  the  very  margin  of  the  brook, 
hemmed  in  by  cliffs,  and  was  bending  down  to  it, 
but  before  he  had  moistened  his  lips  he  drew  back ; 


282  HOMO  SUM. 

just  because  he  was  so  thirsty  he  resolved  to  deny 
himself  drink.  Hastily,  almost  vehemently,  he 
turned  his  back  on  the  spring,  and  after  this  little 
victory  over  himself,  his  storm-tossed  heart  seemed 
a  little  calmer.  Far,  far  from  hence  and  from  the 
wilderness  and  from  the  Sacred  Mountain  he  felt 
impelled  to  fly,  and  he  would  gladly  have  fled  then 
and  there  to  a  distance.  "Whither  should  he  flee? 
It  was  all  the  same,  for  he  was  in  search  of  suffering, 
and  suffering,  like  weeds,  grows  on  every  road.  And 
from  whom  ?  This  question  repeated  itself  again  and 
again  as  if  he  had  shouted  it  in  the  very  home  of  echo, 
and  the  answer  was  not  hard  to  find : "  It  is  from  your- 
self that  you  would  flee.  It  is  your  own  inmost  self 
that  is  your  enemy  ;  bury  yourself  in  what  desert 
you  will,  it  will  pursue  }"ou,  and  it  would  be  easier 
for  you  to  cut  off  your  shadow  than  to  leave  that 
behind?" 

His  whole  conscience  was  absorbed  by  this  sense 
of  impotency,  and  now,  after  the  stormy  excitement 
of  the  last  few  hours,  the  deepest  depression  took 
possession  of  his  mind.  Exhausted,  unstrung,  full  of 
loathing  of  himself  and  life,  he  sank  down  on  a  stone, 
and  thought  over  the  occurrences  of  the  last  few 
days,  with  perfect  impartiality. 

"  Of  all  the  fools  that  ever  I  met,"  thought  he, "  I 
have  gone  farthest  in  folly,  and  have  thereby  led 
things  into  a  state  of  confusion  which  I  mvself  could 

tf 

not  make  straight  again,  even  if  I  were  a  sage — 
which  I  certainly  never  shall  be  any.  more  than  a 
tortoise  or  a  phoenix.  I  once  heard  tell  of  a  hermit 


HOMO  SUM.  283 

who,  because  it  is  written  that  he  ought  to  bury  the 
dead,  and  because  he  had  no  corpse,  slew  a  traveller 
that  he  might  fulfil  the  commandment :  I  have  acted 
in  exactly  the  same  way,  for,  in  order  to  spare  another 
man  suffering  and  to  bear  the  sins  of  another,  I  have 
plunged  an  innocent  woman  into  misery,  and  made 
myself  indeed  a  sinner.  As  soon  as  it  is  light  I  will 
go  down  to  the  oasis  and  confess  to  Petrus  and  Dor- 
othea what  I  have  done.  They  will  punish  me,  and 
I  will  honestly  help  them,  so  that  nothing  of  the 
penance  that  they  may  lay  upon  me  may  be  remitted. 
The  less  mercy  I  show  to  myself,  the  more  will  the 
Eternal  Judge  show  to  me." 

He  rose,  considered  the  position  of  the  stars,  and 
when  he  perceived  that  morning  was  not  far  off,  he 
prepared  to  return  to  Sirona,  who  was  no  longer  any 
more  to  him  than  an  unhappy  woman  to  whom  he 
owed  reparation  for  much  evil,  when  a  loud  cry  of 
distress  in  the  immediate  vicinity  fell  on  his  ear. 

He  mechanically  stooped  to  pick  up  a  stone  for  a 
weapon,  and  listened.  He  knew  every  rock  in  the 
neighborhood  of  the  spring,  and  when  the  strange 
groan  again  made  itself  heard,  he  knew  that  it  came 
from  a  spot  which  he  knew  well  and  where  he  had 
often  rested,  because  a  large  flat  stone  supported  by 
a  stout  pillar  of  granite,  stood  up  far  above  the  sur- 
rounding rocks,  and  afforded  protection  from  the 
sun,  even  at  noon-day,  when  not  a  hand's  breadth  of 
shade  was  to  be  found  elsewhere. 

Perhaps  some  wounded  benst  had  crept  under  the 
rocks  for  shelter  from  the  rain.  Paulus  went  cau- 


284  HOMO  SUM. 

tiously  forward.  The  groaning  sounded  louder  and 
more  distinct  than  before,  and  beyond  a  doubt  it 
was  the  voice  of  a  human  being. 

The  anchorite  hastily  threw  away  the  stone,  fell 
upon  his  knees,  and  soon  found  on  the  dry  spot  of 
ground  under  the  stone,  and  in  the  farthermost  nook 
of  the  retreat,  a  motionless  human  form. 

"  It  is  most  likely  a  herdsman  that  has  been  struck 
by  lightning,"  thought  he,  as  he  felt  with  his  hands 
the  curly  head  of  the  sufferer,  and  the  strong  arms 
that  now  hung  down  powerless.  As  he  raised  the 
injured  man,  who  still  uttered  low  moans,  and  sup- 
ported his  head  on  his  broad  breast,  the  sweet  per- 
fume of  fine  ointment  was  wafted  to  him  from  his 
hair,  and  a  fearful  suspicion  dawned  upon  his  mind. 

"  Polykarp !  "  he  cried,  while  he  clasped  his  hands 
more  tightly  round  the  body  of  the  sufferer  who, 
thus  called  upon,  moved  and  muttered  a  few  unin- 
telligible words  ;  in  a  low  tone,  but  still  much  too 
clearly  for  Paulus,  for  he  now  knew  for  certain  that 
he  had  guessed  rightly.  With  a  loud  cry  of  horror 
he  grasped  the  youth's  powerless  form,  raised  him  in 
his  arms,  and  carried  him  like  a  child  to  the  margin 
of  the  spring  where  he  laid  his  noble  burden  down 
in  the  moist  grass ;  Polykarp  started  and  opened 
his  eyes. 

Morning  was  already  dawning,  the  light  clouds  on 
the  eastern  horizon  were  already  edged  with  rosy 
fringes,  and  the  coming  day  began  to  lift  the  dark 
veil  from,  the  forms  and  hues  of  creation. 

The  young  man  recognized  the  anchorite,  who 


HOMO   SUM.  285 

with  trembling  hands  was  washing  the  wound  at 
the  back  of  his  head,  and  his  eye  assumed  an  angry 
glare  as  he  called  up  all  his  remaining  strength  and 
pushed  his  attendant  from  him.  Paulus  did  not 
withdraw,  he  accepted  the  blow  from  his  victim  as 
a  gift  or  a  greeting,  thinking,  "  Aye,  and  I  only 
wish  you  had  a  dagger  in  your  hand ;  I  would  not 
resist  you." 

The  artist's  wound  was  frightfully  wide  and  deep, 
but  the  blood  had  flowed  among  his  thick  curls,  and 
had  clotted  over  the  lacerated  veins  like  a  thick 
dressing.  The  water  with  which  Paulus  now  washed 
his  head  reopened  them,  and  renewed  the  bleeding, 
and  after  the  one  powerful  effort  with  which  Poly- 
karp  pushed  away  his  enemy,  he  fell  back  senseless 
in  his  arms.  The  wan  morning-light  added  to  the 
pallor  of  the  bloodless  countenance  that  lay  with 
glazed  eyes  in  the  anchorite's  lap. 

"  He  is  dying !  "  murmured  Paulus  in  deadly  an- 
guish and  with  choking  breath,  while  he  looked 
across  the  valley  and  up  to  the  heights,  seeking  help. 
The  mountain  rose  in  front  of  him,  its  majestic  mass 
glowing  in  the  rosy  dawn,  while  light  translucent 
vapor  floated  round  the  peak  where  the  Lord  had 
written  His  laws  for  His  chosen  people,  and  for  all 
peoples,  on  tables  of  stone ;  it  seemed  to  Paulus  that 
he  saw  the  giant  form  of  Moses  far,  far  up  on  its 
sublimest  height  and  that  from  his  lips  in  brazen 
tones  the  strictest  of  all  the  commandments  was 
thundered  down  upon  him  with  awful  wrath,  "  Thou 
shalt  not  kill  J " 


286  HOMO   SUM. 

Paulus  clasped  his  hands  before  his  face  in  silent 
despair,  while  his  victim  still  lay  in  his  lap.  He  had 
closed  his  eyes,  for  he  dared  not  look  on  the  youth's 
pale  countenance,  and  still  less  dared  he  look  up  at 
the  mountain ;  but  the  brazen  voice  from  the  height 
did  not  cease,  and  sounded  louder  and  louder  ;  half 
beside  himself  with  excitement,  in  his  inward  ear  he 
heard  it  still,  "  Thou  shalt  not  kill !  "  and  then  again? 
"  Thou  shalt  not  covet  thy  neighbor's  wife ! "  a  third 
time,  "  Thou  shalt  not  commit  adultery !  "  and  at  last 
a  fourth,  "  Thou  shalt  have  none  other  gods  but  me ! " 

He  that  sins  against  one  of  those  laws  is  damned  ; 
and  he — he  had  broken  them  all,  broken  them  while 
striving  to  tread  the  thorny  path  to  a  life  of  blessed- 
ness. 

Suddenly  and  wildly  he  threw  his  arms  up  to 
heaven,  and  sighing  deeply,  gazed  up  at  the  sacred 
hill. 

"What  was  that  ?  On  the  topmost  peak  of  Sinai 
whence  the  Pharanite  sentinels  were  accustomed  to 
watch  the  distance,  a  handkerchief  was  waving  as  a 
signal  that  the  enemy  were  approaching. 

He  could  not  be  mistaken,  and  as  in  the  face  of 
approaching  danger  he  collected  himself  and  recov- 
ered his  powers^of  thought  and  deliberation,  his  ear 
distinctly  caught  the  mighty  floods  of  stirring  sound 
that  came  over  the  mountain,  from  the  brazen  cym- 
bals struck  by  the  watchmen  to  warn  the  inhabitants 
of  the  oasis,  and  the  anchorites. 

-  Was  Hernias  returned  ?    Had  the  Blemmyes  out- 
stripped him  ?    From  what  quarter  were  the  maraud- 


HOMO  SUM.  287 

ing  hosts  coming  on  ?  Could  he  venture  to  remain 
here  near  his  victim,  or  was  it  his  duty  to  use  his 
powerful  arms  in  defence  of  his  helpless  companions  ? 
In  agonized  doubt  he  looked  down  at  the  youth's 
pallid  features,  and  deep,  sorrowful  compassion  filled 
his  mind. 

How  promising  was  this  young  tree  of  humanity 
that  his  rough  fist  had  broken  off !  and  these  brown 
curls  had  only  yesterday  been  stroked  by  a  mother's 
hand.  His  eyes  filled  with  tears,  and  he  bent  as 
tenderly  as  a  father  might  over  the  pale  face,  and 
pressed  a  gentle  kiss  on  the  bloodless  lips  of  the  sense- 
less youth.  A  thrill  of  joy  shot  through  him,  for 
Polykarp's  lips  were  indeed  not  cold,  he  moved  his 
hand,  and  now —  the  Lord  be  praised  !  he  actually 
opened  his  eyes. 

"  And  I  am  not  a  murderer !  "  A  thousand  voices 
seem  to  sing  with  joy  in  his  heart,  and  then  he 
thought  to  himself, 

"  First  I  will  carry  him  down  to  his  parents  in 
the  oasis,  and  then  go  up  to  the  brethren." 

But  the  brazen  signals  rang  out  with  renewed 
power,  and  the  stillness  of  the  Holy  wilderness  was 
broken  here  by  the  clatter  of  men's  voices,  there  by 
a  blast  of  trumpets,  and  there  again  by  stifled  cries. 
It  was  as  if  a  charm  had  given  life  to  the  rocks  and 
lent  them  AToices ;  as  if  noise  and  clamor  were  rush- 
ing like  wild  torrents  down  every  gorge  and  clif t  of 
the  mountain-side. 

"  It  is  too  late,"  sighed  the  anchorite.  "  If  I  only 
could — if  I  only  knew — " 


288  HOMO   SUM. 

"  Hallo  !  hallo !  holy  Paulus  !  "  a  shrill  woman's 
voice  which  seemed  to  come  from  high  up  in  the  air 
rang  out  joyful  and  triumphant,  interrupting  the  ir- 
resolute man's  meditations,  "  Hermas  is  alive !  Her- 
nias is  here  again!  Only  look  up  at  the  heights. 
There  flies  the  standard,  for  he  has  warned  the  sen- 
tinels. The  Blemmyes  are  coming  on,  and  he  sent 
me  to  seek  you.  You  must  come  to  the  strong  tower 
on  the  western  side  of  the  ravine.  Make  haste  !  come 
at  once!  Do  you  hear?  He  told  me  to  tell  you. 
But  the  man  in  your  lap — it  is — yes,  it  is — " 

"  It  is  your  master's  son  Polykarp,"  Paulus  called 
back  to  her.  "  He  is  hurt  unto  death ;  hurry  down  to 
the  oasis,  and  tell  the  Senator,  tell  Dame  Dorothea — " 

"  I  have  something  else  to  do  now,"  interupted  the 
shepherdess.  "  Hermas  has  sent  me  to  warn  Gelasius, 
Psoes,  and  Dulas,  and  if  I  went  down  into  the  oasis 
they  would  lock  me  up,  and  not  let  me  come  up  the 
mountain  again.  What  has  happened  to  the  poor 
fellow  ?  But  it  is  all  the  same ;  there  is  something 
else  for  you  to  do  besides  grieving  over  a  hole  in  Poly- 
karp's  head.  Go  up  to  the  tower,  I  tell  you,  and  let 
him  lie — or  carry  him  up  with  you  into  your  new  den 
and  hand  him  over  to  your  sweetheart  to  nurse." 

"  Demon !  "  exclaimed  Paulus,  taking  up  a  stone. 

"  Let  him  lie ! "  repeated  Miriam.  "  I  will  betray 
her  hiding-place  to  Phoebicius,  if  you  do  not  do  as 
Hermas  orders  you.  Now  I  am  off  to  call  the  others, 
and  we  shall  meet  again  at  the  tower.  And  you  had 
better  not  linger  too  long  with  your  fair  companion 
— pious  Paulus — saintly  Paulus !  " 


HOMO   SUM.  289 

And  laughing  loudly,  she  sprang  away  from  rock 
to  rock  as  if  borne  up  by  the  air. 

The  Alexandrian  looked  wrathfully  after  her  ;  but 
her  advice  did  not  seem  to  be  bad,  he  lifted  the  wound- 
ed man  on  his  shoulders,  and  hastily  carried  him  up 
towards  his  cave ;  but  before  he  could  reach  it  he 
heard  steps,  and  a  loud  agonized  scream,  and  in  a  few 
seconds  Sirona  was  by  his  side,  crying  in  passionate 
grief,  "  It  is  he,  it  is  he — and  oh,  to  see  him  thus  ! — 
But  he  must  live,  for  if  he  were  dead  your  God  of  Love 
would  be  inexorable,  pitiless,  hard,  cruel — it  would 
be—" 

She  could  say  no  more,  for  tears  choked  her  voice, 
and  Paulus,  without  listening  to  her  lamentation, 
passed  quickly  on  in  front  of  her,  entered  the  cave 
and  laid  the  unconscious  man  down  on  the  coach, 
saying  gravely  but  kindly,  as  Sirona  threw  herself 
on  her  knees  and  pressed  the  young  man's  powerless 
hand  to  her  lips, 

"  If  indeed  you  truly  love  him,  cease  crying  and 
lamenting.  He  yesterday  got  a  severe  wound  on 
his  head  ;  I  have  washed  it,  now  do  you  bind  it  up 
with  care,  and  keep  it  constantly  cool  with  fresh 
water.  You  know  your  way  to  the  spring ;  when 
he  recovers  his  senses  rub  his  feet,  and  give  him 
some  bread  and  a  few  drops  of  the  wine  which  you 
will  find  in  the  little  cellar  hard  by ;  there  is  some 
oil  there  too,  which  you  will  need  for  a  light. 

"  I  must  go  up  to  the  brethren,  and  if  I  do  not  re- 
turn to-morrow,  give  the  poor  lad  over  to  his  mother 
to  nurse.     Only  tell  her  this,  that  I,  Paulus,  gave 
'9 


290  HOMO   SUM. 

him  this  wound  in  a  moment  of  rage,  and  to  forgive 
me  if  she  can,  she  and  Petrus.  And  you  too  for- 
give me  that  in  which  I  have  sinned  against  you, 
and  if  I  should  fall  in  the  battle  which  awaits  us, 
pray  that  the  Lord  may  not  be  too  hard  upon  me  in 
the  day  of  judgment,  for  my  sins  are  great  and 
many." 

At  this  moment  the  sound  of  the  trumpets  sounded 
even  into  the  deepest  recess  of  the  cave.  Sirona 
started.  "  That  is  the  Koman  tuba,"  she  exclaimed. 
"  I  know  the  sound — Phoebicius  is  coming  this  way." 

"He  is  doing  his  duty,"  replied  Paulus.  "And 
still,  one  thing  more.  I  saw  last  night  a  ring  on 
your  hand — an  onyx." 

"  There  it  lies,"  said  Sirona  ;  and  she  pointed  to 
the  farthest  corner  of  the  cave,  where  it  lay  on  the 
dusty  soil. 

"Let  it  remain  there,"  Paulus  begged  of  her;  he 
bent  over  the  senseless  man  once  more  to  kiss  his 
forehead,  raised  his  hand  towards  Sirona  in  sign  of 
blessing,  and  rushed  out  into  the  open  air. 


HOMO   SUM.  291 


CHAPTER  Yin. 

Two  paths  led  over  the  mountain  from  the  oasis 
to  the  sea;  both  followed  deep  and  stony  gorges, 
one  of  which  was  named  the  "  short  cut,"  because 
the  traveller  reached  his  destination  more  quickly 
by  that  road  than  by  following  the  better  road  in 
the  other  ravine,  which  was  practicable  for  beasts 
of  burden.  Half-way  up  the  height  the  "  short  cut '" 
opened  out  on  a  little  plateau,  whose  western  side 
was  shut  in  by  a  high  mass  of  rock  with  steep  and 
precipitous  flanks.  At  the  top  of  this  rock  stood  a 
tower  built  of  rough  blocks,  in  which  the  anchorites 
were  wont  to  take  refuge  when  they  were  threat- 
ened with  a  descent  of  their  foes. 

The  position  of  this  castle — as  the  penitents 
proudly  styled  their  tower — was  well-chosen,  for 
from  its  summit  they  commanded  not  only  the 
"  short  cut "  to  the  oasis,  but  also  the  narrow  shell- 
strewn  strip  of  desert  which  divided  the  western  de- 
clivity of  the  Holy  Mountain  from  the  shore,  the 
blue-green  waters  of  the  sea,  and  the  distant  chain 
of  hills  on  the  African  coast. 

Whatever  approached  the  tower,  whether  from 
afar  or  from  the  neighborhood,  was  at  once  espied 
by  them,  and  the  side  of  the  rock  which  was  turned 


292  HOMO   SUM. 

to  the  road-way  was  so  precipitous  and  smooth  that 
it  remained  inaccessible  even  to  the  natives  of  the 
desert,  who,  with  their  naked  feet  and  sinewy  arms, 
could  climb  points  which  even  the  wild  goat  and  the 
jackal  made  a  circuit  to  avoid.  It  was  more  acces- 
sible from  the  other  side,  and  in  order  to  secure  that, 
a  very  strong  wall  had  been  built,  which  enclosed 
the  level  on  which  the  castle  stood  in  the  form  of  a 
horse-shoe,  of  which  the  ends  abutted  on  the  decliv- 
ity of  the  short  road.  This  structure  was  so  roughly 
and  inartistically  heaped  together  that  it  looked  as 
if  formed  by  nature  rather  than  by  the  hand  of  man. 
The  rough  and  unfinished  appearance  of  this  wall- 
like  heap  of  stones  was  heightened  by  the  quantity 
of  large  and  small  pieces  of  granite  which  were  piled 
on  the  top  of  it,  and  which  had  been  collected  by  the 
anchorites,  in  case  of  an  incursion,  to  roll  and  hurl 
down  on  the  invading  robbers.  A  cistern  had  been 
dug  out  of  the  rocky  soil  of  the  plateau  which  the 
wall  enclosed,  and  care  was  taken  to  keep  it  con- 
stantly filled  with  water. 

Such  precautions  were  absolutely  necessary,  for 
the  anchorites  were  threatened  with  dangers  from 
two  sides.  First  from  the  Ishmaelite  hordes  of  Sar- 
acens who  fell  upon  them  from  the  East,  and  sec- 
ondly from  the  Blemmyes,  the  wild  inhabitants  of 
the  desert-country  which  borders  the  fertile  lands  of 
Egypt  and  Nubia,  and  particularly  of  the  barren 
highlands  that  part  the  Ked  Sea  from  the  Nile  val- 
ley ;  they  crossed  the  sea  in  light  skiffs,  and  then 
poured  over  the  mountain  like  a  swarm  of  locusts. 


HOMO   SUM.  293 

The  little  stores  and  savings  which  the  defenceless 
hermits  treasured  in  their  caves  had  tempted  the 
Blemmyes  again  and  again,  in  spite  of  the  Koman 
garrison  in  Pharan,  which  usually  made  its  appear- 
ance on  the  scene  of  their  incursion  long  after  they 
had  disappeared  with  their  scanty  booty.  Not  many 
months  since,  the  raid  had  been  effected  in  which 
old  Stephanus  had  been  wounded  by  an  arrow,  and 
there  was  every  reason  to  hope  that  the  wild 
marauders  would  not  return  very  soon,  for  Phoebi- 
cius,  the  commander  of  the  Roman  maniple  in  the 
oasis,  was  swift  and  vigorous  in  his  office,  and 
though  he  had  not  succeeded  in  protecting  the  an- 
chorites from  all  damage,  he  had  followed  up  the 
Blemmyes,  who  fled  at  his  approach,  and  cut  them 
off  from  rejoining  their  boats.  A  battle  took  place 
between  the  barbarians  and  the  Romans,  not  far 
from  the  coast  on  the  desert  track  dividing  the  hills 
from  the  sea,  which  resulted  in  the  total  annihilation 
of  the  wild  tribes  and  gave  ground  to  hope  that  such 
a  lesson  might  serve  as  a  warning  to  the  sons  of  the 
desert.  But  if  hitherto  the  more  easily  quelled 
promptings  of  covetousness  had  led  them  to  cross  the 
sea,  they  were  now  animated  by  the  most  sacred  of 
all  duties,  by  the  law  which  required  them  to  avenge 
the  blood  of  their  fathers  and  brothers,  and  they 
xlared  to  plan  a  fresh  incursion  in  which  they  should 
put  forth  all  their  resources.  They  were  at  the  same 
time  obliged  to  exercise  the  greatest  caution,  and 
collected  their  forces  of  young  men  in  the  valleys 
that  lay  hidden  in  the  long  range  of  coast-hills. 


294  HOMO  SUM. 

The  passage  of  the  narrow  arm  of  the  sea  that 
parted  them  from  Arabia  Petraea,  was  to  be  effected 
in  the  first  dark  night  ;  the  sun,  this  evening,  had 
set  behind  heavy  storm-clouds  that  had  discharged 
themselves  in  violent  rain  and  had  obscured  the  light 
of  the  waning  moon.  So  they  drew  their  boats  and 
rafts  down  to  the  sea,  and,  unobserved  by  the  senti- 
nels on  the  mountain,  who  had  taken  shelter  fromthe, 
storm  under  their  little  penthouses,  they  would  have 
reached  the  opposite  shore,  the  mountain,  and  per- 
haps even  the  oasis,  if  some  one  had  not  warned  the 
anchorites — and  that  some  one  was  Hennas. 

Obedient  to  the  commands  of  Paulus,  the  lad  had 
appropriated  three  of  his  friend's  gold  pieces,  had 
provided  himself  with  a  bow  and  arrows  and  some 
bread,  and  then,  after  muttering  a  farewell  to  his 
father,  who  was  asleep  in  his  cave,  he  set  out  for 
Raithu.  Happy  in  the  sense  of  his  strength  and 
manhood,  proud  of  the  task  which  had  been  set  him 
and  which  he  deemed  worthy  of  a  future  soldier,  and 
cheerfully  ready  to  fulfil  it  even  at  the  cost  of  his  life, 
he  hastened  forward  in  the  bright  moonlight.  He 
quitted  the  path  at  the  spot  where,  to  render  the  ascent 
possible  even  to  the  vigorous  desert-travellers,  it  took 
a  zigzag  line,  and  clambered  from  rock  to  rock,  up  and 
down  in  a  direct  line ;  when  he  came  to  a  level  spot 
he  flew  on  as  if  pursuers  were  at  his  heels.  After 
sunrise  he  refreshed  himself  with  a  morsel  of  food, 
and  then  hurried  on  again,  not  heeding  the  heat  of 
noon,  nor  that  of  the  soft  sand  in  which  his  foot 
sank  as  he  followed  the  line  of  the  sea-coast. 


HOMO   SUM.  295 

Thus  passionately  hurrying  onwards  he  thought 
neither  of  Sirona  nor  of  his  past  life — only  of  the 
hills  on  the  farther  shore  and  of  the  Bleramyes — how 
he  should  best  surprise  them,  and,  when  he  had  learnt 
their  plans,  how  he  might  recross  the  sea  and 
return  to  his  own  people.  At  last,  as  he  got  more 
and  more  weary,  as  the  heat  of  the  sun  grew  more 
oppressive,  and  as  the  blood  rushed  more  painfully 
to  his  heart  and  began  to  throb  more  rapidly  in 
his  temples, '  he  lost  all  power  of  thought  and 
that  which  dwelt  in  his  mind  was  no  more  than  a 
dumb  longing  to  reach  his  destination  as  soon  as 
possible. 

It  was  the  third  afternoon  when  he  saw  from  afar 
the  palms  of  Raithu,  and  hurried  on  with  revived 
strength.  Before  the  sun  had  set  he  had  informed 
the  anchorite,  to  whom  Paulus  had  directed  him, 
that  the  Alexandrian  declined  their  call,  and  was 
minded  to  remain  on  the  Holy  Mountain. 

Then  Hernias  proceeded  to  the  little  harbor,  to 
bargain  with  the  fishermen  of  the  place  for  the  boat 
which  he  needed.  "While  he  was  talking  with  an 
old  Amalekite  boatman,  who,  with  his  black-eyed 
sons,  was  arranging  his  nets,  two  riders  came  at  a 
quick  pace  towards  the  bay  in  which  a  large  mer- 
chant-ship lay  at  anchor,  surrounded  by  little  barks. 
The  fisherman  pointed  to  it. 

"  It  is  waiting  for  the  caravan  from  Petra,"  he 
said.  "  There,  on  the  dromedary,  is  the  emperor's 
great  warrior  who  commands  the  Romans  in 
Pharan." 


296  HOMO   SUM. 

Hermas  saw  Phcebicius  for  the  first  time,  and  as 
he  rode  up  towards  him  and  the  fisherman  he  started ; 
if  he  had  followed  his  first  impulse,  he  would  have 
turned  and  have  taken  to  flight,  but  his  clear  eyes 
had  met  the  dull  and  searching  glance  of  the 
centurion,  and,  blushing  at  his  own  weakness,  he 
stood  still  with  his  arms  crossed,  and  proudly  and 
defiantly  awaited  the  Gaul  who  with  his  com- 
panion came  straight  up  to  him. 

Talib  had  previously  seen  the  youth  by  his  father's 
side  ;  he  recognized  him  and  asked  how  long  he  had 
been  there,  and  if  he  had  come  direct  from  the 
mountain.  Hermas  answered  him  as  was  becoming, 
and  understood  at  once  that  it  was  not  he  that  the 
centurion  was  seeking. 

Perfectly  reassured  and  not  without  curiosity  he 
looked  at  the  new-comer,  and  a  smile  curled  his  lips 
as  he  observed  that  the  lean  old  man,  exhausted  by 
his  long  and  hurried  ride,  could  scarcely  hold  him- 
self on  his  beast,  and  at  the  same  time  it  struck  him 
that  this  pitiable  old  man  was  the  husband  of  the 
blooming  and  youthful  Sirona.  Far  from  feeling 
any  remorse  for  his  intrusion  into  this  man's  house, 
he  yielded  entirely  to  the  audacious  humor  with 
which  his  aspect  filled  him,  and  when  Phcebicius 
himself  asked  him  as  to  whether  he  had  not  met  on 
his  way  with  a  fair-haired  woman  and  a  limping 
greyhound,  he  replied,  repressing  his  laughter  with 
difficulty, 

"  Aye,  indeed !  I  did  see  such  a  woman  and  her 
dog,  but  I  do  not  think  it  was  lame." 


HOMO   SUM.  297 

"Where  did  you  see  her?"  asked  Phoebicius 
hastily. 

Hermas  colored,  for  he  was  obliged  to  tell  an  un- 
truth, and  it  might  be  that  he  would  do  Sirona 
an  injury  by  giving  false  information.  He  there- 
fore ventured  to  give  no  decided  answer,  but  en- 
quired, 

"  Has  the  woman  committed  some  crime  that  you 
are  pursuing  her? " 

"  A  great .  one ! "  replied  Talib,  "  she  is  my  lord's 
wife,  and — 

"  What  she  has  done  wrong  concerns  me  alone," 
said  Phoebicius,  sharply  interrupting  his  companion. 
"  I  hope  this  fellow  saw  better  than  you  who  took 
the  crying  woman  with  a  child,  from  Aila,  for 
Sirona.  What  is  your  name,  boy  ? " 

"  Hermas,"  answered  the  lad.  "  And  who  are  you, 
pray  ? " 

"  The  Gaul's  lips  were  parted  for  an  angry  reply, 
but  he  suppressed  it  and  said, 

"  I  am  the  emperor's  centurion,  and  I  ask  you, 
what  did  the  woman  look  like  whom  you  saw,  and 
where  did  you  meet  her  ? " 

The  soldier's  fierce  looks,  and  his  captain's  words 
showed  Hermas  that  the  fugitive  woman  had  nothing 
good  to  expect  if  she  were  caught,  and  as  he  was  not 
in  the  least  inclined  to  assist  her  pursuers  he  hastily 
replied,  giving  the  reins  to  his  audacity,  "  I  at  any 
rate  did  not  meet  the  person  whom  you  seek ;  the 
woman  I  saw  is  certainly  not  this  man's  wife,  for  she 
might  very  well  be  his  grand-daughter.  She  had 


298  HOMO  SUM. 

gold  hair,  and  a  rosy  face,  and  the  greyhound  that 
followed  her  was  called  lambe." 

"  Where  did  you  meet  her  ? "  shrieked  the  cen- 
turion. 

"  In  the  fishing-village  at  the  foot  of  the  mount- 
ain," replied  Hernias.  "  She  got  into  a  boat,  and 
away  it  went  1 " 

"  Towards  the  north  ?  "  asked  the  Gaul. 

"  I  think  so,"  replied  Hernias,  "  but  I  do  not 
know,  for  I  was  in  a  hurry,  and  could  not  look  after 
her." 

"  Then  we  will  try  to  take  her  in  Klysma,"  cried 
Phoebicius  to  the  Amalekite.  "  If  only  there  were 
horses  in  this  accursed  desert ! " 

"  It  is  four  days'  journey,"  said  Talib  considering. 
"And  beyond  Elim  there  is  no  water  before  the 
Wells  of  Moses.  Certainly  if  we  could  get  good 
dromedaries — 

"  And  if,"  interrupted  Hernias, "  it  were  not  better 
that  you,  my  lord  centurion,  should  not  go  so  far 
from  the  oasis.  For  over  there  they  say  that  the 
Blemmyes  are  gathering,  and  I  myself  am  going 
across  as  a  spy  so  soon  as  it  is  dark." 

Phoebicius  looked  down  gloomily  considering  the 
matter.  The  news  had  reached  him  too  that  the  sons 
of  the  desert  were  preparing  for  a  new  incursion, 
and  he  cried  to  Talib  angrily,  but  decidedly,  as  he 
turned  his  back  upon  Hennas,  "  You  must  ride  alone 
to  Klysma,  and  try  to  capture  her.  I  cannot  and 
will  not  neglect  my  duty  for  the  sake  of  the  wretch- 
ed woman." 


HOMO   SUM.  299 

Hermas  looked  after  him  as  he  went  away,  and 
laughed  out  loud  when  he  saw  him  disappear  into  his 
inn.  He  hired  a  boat  from  the  old  man  for  his 
passage  across  the  sea  for  one  of  the  gold-pieces 
given  him  by  Paulus,  and  lying  down  on  the  nets  he 
refreshed  himself  by  a  deep  sleep  of  some  hours' 
duration.  "When  the  moon  rose  he  was  roused  in 
obedience  to  his  orders,  and  helped  the  boy  who 
accompanied  him,  and  who  understood  the  man- 
agement of  the  sails  and  rudder,  to  push  the  boat, 
which  was  laid  up  on  the  sand,  down  into  the  sea. 
Soon  he  was  flying  over  the  smooth  and  glisten- 
ing waters  before  a  light  wind,  and  he  felt  as  fresh 
and  strong  in  spirit  as  a  young  eagle  that  has  just 
left  the  nest,  and  spreads  its  mighty  wings  for  the 
first  time.  He  could  have  shouted  in  his  new  and 
delicious  sense  of  freedom,  and  the  boy  at  the  stern 
shook  his  head  in  astonishment  when  he  saw  Hermas 
wield  the  oars  he  had  entrusted  to  him,  unskilfully 
it  is  true,  but  with  mighty  strokes. 

"  The  wind  is  in  our  favor,"  he  called  out  to  the 
anchorite  as  he  hauled  round  the  sail  with  the  rope 
in  his  hand,  "  we  shall  get  on  without  your  working 
so  hard.  You  may  save  your  strength." 

"  There  is  plenty  of  it,  and  I  need  not  be  stingy  of 
it,"  answered  Hermas,  and  he  bent  forward  for  an- 
other powerful  stroke. 

About  half  way  he  took  a  rest,  and  admired  the 
reflection  of  the  moon  in  the  bright  mirror  of  the 
water,  and  he  could  not  but  think  of  Petrus'  court- 
yard that  had  shone  in  the  same  silver  light  when 


3oo  HOMO  SUM. 

he  had  climbed  up  to  Sirona's  window.  The  image 
of  the  fair,  white-armed  woman  recurred  to  his  mind, 
and  a  melancholy  longing  began  to  creep  over  him. 

He  sighed  softly,  again  and  yet  again ;  but  as  his 
breast  heaved  for  the  third  bitter  sigh,  he  remem- 
bered the  object  of  his  journey  and  his  broken  fet- 
ters, and  with  eager  arrogance  he  struck  the  oar 
flat  on  the  water  so  that  it  spurted  high  up,  and 
sprinkled  the  boat  and  him  with  a  shower  of  wet 
and  twinkling  diamond-drops.  He  began  to  work 
the  oars  again,  reflecting  as  he  did  so,  that  he  had 
something  better  to  do  than  to  think  of  a  woman.  In- 
deed, he  found  it  easy  to  forget  Sirona  completely, 
for  in  the  next  few  days  he  went  through  every 
excitement  of  a  warrior's  life. 

Scarcely  two  hours  after  his  start  from  Ra'ithu  he 
was  standing  on  the  soil  of  another  continent,  and, 
after  finding  a  hiding-place  for  his  boat,  he  slipped 
off  among  the  hills  to  watch  the  movements  of  the 
Blemmyes.  The  very  first  day  he  went  up  to  the 
valley  in  which  they  were  gathering ;  on  the  second, 
after  being  many  times  seen  and  pursued,  he  suc- 
ceeded in  seizing  a  warrior  who  had  been  sent  out 
to  reconnoitre,  and  in  carrying  him  off  with  him ;  he 
bound  him,  and  by  heavy  threats  learned  many 
things  from  him. 

The  number  of  their  collected  enemies  was  great, 
but  Hernias  had  hopes  of  outstripping  them,  for  his 
prisoner  revealed  to  him  the  spot  where  their  boats, 
drawn  up  on  shore,  lay  hidden  under  sand  and 
stones. 


HOMO  SUM.  301 

As  soon  as  it  was  dusk,  the  anchorite  in  his  boat 
went  towards  the  place  of  embarkation,  and  when 
the  Bleramyes,  in  the  darkness  of  midnight,  drew 
their  first  bark  into  the  water,  Hernias  sailed  off 
ahead  of  the  enemy,  landed  in  much  danger  below 
the  western  declivity  of  the  mountain,  and  hastened 
up  towards  Sinai  to  warn  the  Pharanite  watchmen 
on  the  beacon. 

He  gained  the  top  of  the  difficult  peak  before  sun- 
rise, roused  the  lazy  sentinels  who  had  left  their 
posts  and  before  they  were  able  to  mount  guard,  to 
hoist  the  flags  or  to  begin  to  sound  the  brazen 
cymbals,  he  had  hurried  on  down  the  valley  to  his 
father's  cave. 

Since  his  disappearance  Miriam  had  incessantly 
hovered  round  Stephanus'  dwelling,  and  had  fetched 
fresh  water  for  the  old  man  every  morning,  noon 
and  evening,  even  after  a  new  nurse,  who  was  clum- 
sier and  more  peevish,  had  taken  Paulus'  place.  She 
lived  on  roots,  and  on  the  bread  the  sick  man  gave 
her,  and  at  night  she  lay  down  to  sleep  in  a  deep  dry 
cleft  of  the  rock  that  she  had  long  known  well. 
She  quitted  her  hard  bed  before  daybreak  to  refill 
the  old  man's  pitcher,  and  to  chatter  to  him  about 
Hermas. 

She  was  a  willing  servant  to  Stephanus  because 
as  often  as  she  went  to  him,  she  could  hear  his  son's 
name  from  his  lips,  and  he  rejoiced  at  her  coming 
because  she  always  gave  him  the  opportunity  of 
talking  of  Hermas. 

For  many  weeks  the  sick  man  had  been  so  accus- 


302  HOMO  SUM. 

tomed  to  let  himself  be  waited  on  that  he  accepted 
the  shepherdess's  good  offices  as  a  matter  of  course, 
and  she  never  attempted  to  account  to  herself  for  her 
readiness  to  serve  him.  Stephanus  would  have  suf- 
fered in  dispensing  with  her,  and  to  her,  her  visits  to 
the  well  and  her  conversations  with  the  old  man 
had  become  a  need,  nay  a  necessity,  for  she  still  was 
ignorant  whether  Hermas  was  yet  alive,  or  whether 
Phoebicius  had  killed  him  in  consequence  of  her  be- 
trayal. Perhaps  all  that  Stephanus  told  her  of  his 
son's  journey  of  investigation  was  an  invention  of 
Paulus  to  spare  the  sick  man,  and  accustom  him 
gradually  to  the  loss  of  his  child ;  and  yet  she  was 
only  too  willing  to  believe  that  Hermas  still  lived, 
and  she  quitted  the  neighborhood  of  the  cave  as  late 
as  possible,  and  filled  the  sick  man's  water-jar  before 
the  sun  was  up,  only  because  she  said  to  herself  that 
the  fugitive  on  his  return  would  seek  no  one  else  so 
soon  as  his  father. 

She  had  not  one  really  quiet  moment,  for  if  a  fall- 
ing stone,  an  approaching  footstep,  or  the  cry  of  a 
beast  broke  the  stillness  of  the  desert  she  at  once  hid 
herself,  and  listened  with  a  beating  heart ;  much  less 
from  fear  of  Petrus  her  master,  from  whom  she  had 
run  away,  than  in  the  expectation  of  hearing  the 
step  of  the  man  whom  she  had  betrayed  into  the 
hand  of  his  enemy,  and  for  whom  she  nevertheless 
painfully  longed  day  and  night. 

As  often  as  she  lingered  by  the  spring  she  wetted 
her  stubborn  hair  to  smooth  it,  and  washed  her  face 
with  as  much  zeal  as  if  she  thought  she  should  sue- 


HOMO  SUM.  303 

ceed  in  washing  the  dark  hue  out  of  her  skin.  And 
all  this  she  did  for  him,  that  on  his  return  she  might 
charm  him  as  much  as  the  white  woman  in  the  oasis, 
whom  she  hated  as  fiercely  as  she  loved  him  passion- 
ately. 

During  the  heavy  storm  of  last  night  a  torrent 
from  the  mountain  height  had  shed  itself  into  her 
retreat  and  had  driven  her  out  of  it.  Wet  through, 
shelterless,  tormented  by  remorse,  fear  and  longing, 
she  had  clambered  from  stone  to  stone,  and  sought 
refuge  and  peace  under  first  one  rock  and  then 
another ;  thus  she  had  been  attracted  by  the  glim- 
mer of  light  that  shone  out  of  the  new  dwelling  of 
the  pious  Paulus ;  she  had  seen  and  recognized  the 
Alexandrian,  but  he  had  not  observed  her  as  he  cow- 
ered on  the  ground  near  his  hearth  deeply  sunk  in 
thought. 

She  knew  now  where  the  excommunicated  man 
dwelt  after  whom  Stephanus  often  asked,  and  she 
had  gathered  from  the  old  man's  lamentations  and 
dark  hints,  that  Paulus  too  had  been  ensnared  and 
brought  to  ruin  by  her  enemy. 

As  the  morning-star  began  to  pale,  Miriam  went 
up  to  Stephanus'  cave ;  her  heart  was  full  of  tears, 
and  yet  she  was  unable  to  pour  out  her  need  and 
suffering  in  a  soothing  flood  of  weeping;  she  was 
wholly  possessed  with  a  wild  desire  to  sink  down 
on  the  earth  there  and  die,  and  to  be  released  by 
death  from  her  relentless,  driving  torment.  But  it 
was  still  too  early  to  disturb  the  old  man — and  yet 
— she  must  hear  a  human  voice,  one  word — even  if 


304  HOMO   SUM. 

it  were  a  hard  word — from  the  lips  of  a  human  be- 
ing ;  for  the  bewildering  feeling  of  distraction  which 
confused  her  mind,  and  the  misery  of  abandonment 
that  crushed  her  heart,  were  all  too  cruelly  painful 
to  be  borne. 

She  was  standing  by  the  entrance  to  the  cave 
when,  high  above  her  head,  she  heard  the  falling  of 
stones  and  the  cry  of  a  human  voice.  She  started 
and  listened  with  outstretched  neck  and  strung 
sinews,  motionless.  Then  she  broke  suddenly  into  a 
loud  and  piercing  shout  of  joy,  and  flinging  up  her 
arms  she  flew  up  the  mountain  towards  a  traveller 
who  came  swiftly  down  to  meet  her. 

"  Hernias  !  Hermas ! "  she  shouted,  and  all  the 
sunny  delight  of  her  heart  was  reflected  in  her  cry 
so  clearly  and  purely  that  the  sympathetic  chords  in 
the  young  man's  soul  echoed  the  sound,  and  he  hailed 
her  with  joyful  welcome. 

He  had  never  before  greeted  her  thus,  and  the 
tone  of  his  voice  revived  her  poor  crushed  heart  like 
a  restorative  draught  offered  by  a  tender  hand  to 
the  lips  of  the  dying.  Exquisite  delight,  and  a  glow 
of  gratitude  such  as  she  had  never  before  felt  flooded 
her  soul,  and  as  he  was  so  good  to  her  she  longed  to 
show  him  that  she  had  something  to  offer  in  return 
for  the  gift  of  friendship  Avhich  he  offered  her.  So 
the  first  thing  she  said  to  him  was,  "  I  have  stayed 
constantly  near  your  father,  and  have  brought  him 
water  early  and  late,  as  much  as  he  needed." 

She  blushed  as  she  thus  for  the  first  time  praised 
herself  to  him,  but  Hermas  exclaimed, 


HOMO   SUM.  305 

"  That  is  a  good  girl !  and  I  will  not  forget  it. 
You  are  a  wild,  silly  thing,  but  I  believe  that  you 
are  to  be  relied  on  by  those  to  whom  you  feel 
kindly." 

"  Only  try  me,"  cried  Miriam  holding  out  her 
hand  to  him.  He  took  it,  and  as  they  went  on  to- 
gether he  said, 

"  Do  you  hear  the  brass  ?  I  have  warned  the 
watchmen  up  there  ;  the  Blemmyes  are  coming.  Is 
Paulus  with  my  father  ?  " 

"  Ko,  but  I  know  where  he  is." 

"  Then  you  must  call  him,"  said  the  young  man. 
"  Him  first  and  then  Gelasius,  and  Psoes,  and  Dulas, 
and  any  more  of  the  penitents  that  you  can  find. 
They  must  all  go  to  the  castle  by  the  ravine.  Now 
I  will  go  to  my  father ;  you  hurry  on  and  show  that 
you  are  to  be  trusted."  As  he  spoke  he  put  his  arm 
round  her  waist,  but  she  slipped  shyly  away,  and 
calling  out,  "  I  will  take  them  all  the  message,"  she 
hurried  oif . 

In  front  of  the  cave  where  she  had  hoped  to  meet 
with  Paulus  she  found  Sirona ;  she  did  not  stop  with 
her,  but  contented  herself  with  laughing  wildly  and 
calling  out  words  of  abuse. 

Guided  by  the  idea  that  she  should  find  the  Alex- 
andrian at  the  nearest  well,  she  went  on  and  called 
him,  then  hurrying  on  from  cave  to  cave  she  de- 
livered her  message  in  Hennas'  name,  happy  to  serve 
him. 
20 


306  HOMO  SUM. 


CHAPTER  IX. 

THEY  were  all  collected  behind  the  rough  wall  on 
the  edge  of  the  ravine — the  strange  men  who  had 
turned  their  back  on  life  with  all  its  joys  and  pains, 
its  duties  and  its  delights,  on  the  community  and 
family  to  which  they  belonged,  and  had  fled  to  the 
desert,  there  to  strive  for  a  prize  above  and  beyond 
this  life,  when  they  had  of  their  own  free  will  re- 
nounced all  other  effort.  In  the  voiceless  desert,  far 
from  the  enticing  echoes  of  the  world,  it  might  be 
easy  to  kill  every  sensual  impulse,  to  throw  off  the 
fetters  of  the  world,  and  so  bring  that  humanity, 
which  was  bound  to  the  dust  through  sin  and  flesh, 
nearer  to  the  pure  and  incorporate  being  of  the 
Divinity. 

All  these  men  were  Christians,  and,  like  the  Sav- 
iour who  had  freely  taken  torments  upon  Himself  to 
become  the  Redeemer,  they  too  sought  through  the 
purifying  power  of  suffering  to  free  themselves  from 
the  dross  of  their  impure  human  nature,  and  by  severe 
penance  to  contribute  their  share  of  atonement  for 
their  own  guilt,  and  for  that  of  all  their  race.  No 
fear  of  persecution  had  driven  them  into  the  desert 
— nothing  but  the  hope  of  gaining  the  hardest  of 
victories. 

All  the  anchorites  who  had  been  summoned  to  the, 


HOMO   SUM.  307 

tower  were  Egyptians  and  Syrians,  and  among  the 
former  particularly  there  were  many  who,  being 
already  inured  to  abstinence  and  penance  in  the  ser- 
vice of  the  old  gods  in  their  own  country,  now  as 
Christians  had  selected  as  the  scene  of  their  pious 
exorcises  the  very  spot  wbere  the  Lord  must  have 
revealed  Himself  to  His  elect. 

At  a  later  date  not  merely  Sinai  itself  but  the 
whole  tract  of  Arabia  Petraea — through  which,  as  it 
was  said,  the  Jews  at  their  exodus  under  Moses  had 
wandered — was  peopled  with  Ascetics  of  like  mind, 
who  gave  to  their  settlements  the  names  of  the  rest- 
ing-places of  the  chosen  people,  as  mentioned  in  the 
Scriptures  ;  but  as  yet  there  was  no  connection  be- 
tween the  individual  penitents,  no  order  ruled  their 
lives  ;  they  might  still  be  counted  by  tens,  though 
ere  long  they  numbered  hundreds  and  thousands. 

The  threat  of  danger  had  brought  all  these  con- 
temners  of  the  world  and  of  life  in  stormy  haste  to 
the  shelter  of  the  tower,  in  spite  of  their  readiness  to 
die.  Only  old  Kosmas,  who  had  withdrawn  to  the 
desert  with  his  wife — she  had  found  a  grave  there — 
had  remained  in  his  cave,  and  had  declared  to  Gela- 
sius  who  shared  his  cave  and  who  had  urged  him  to 
flight,  that  he  was  content  in  whatever  place  or 
whatever  hour  the  Lord  should  call  him,  and  that  it 
was  in  God's  hands  to  decide  whether  old  age  or  an 
arrow-shot  should  open  to  him  the  gates  of  Heaven. 

It  was  quite  otherwise  with  the  rest  of  the  ancho- 
rites, who  rushed  through  the  narrow  door  of  the 
watch-tower  and  into  its  inner-room  till  it  was  filled 


308  HOMO   SUM. 

to  overflowing,  and  Paulus,  who  in  the  presence  of 
danger  had  fully  recovered  his  equanimity,  was 
obliged  to  refuse  admission  to  a  newcomer  in  order 
to  preserve  the  closely  packed  and  trembling  crowd 
from  injury. 

No  murrain  passes  from  beast  to  beast,  no  mildew 
from  fruit  to  fruit  with  such  rapidity  as  fear  spreads 
from  man  to  man.  Those  who  had  been  driven  by 
the  sharpest  lashings  of  terror  had  run  the  fastest, 
and  reached  the  castle  first.  They  had  received 
those  who  followed  them  with  lamentations  and  out- 
cries, and  it  was  a  pitiable  sight  to  see  how  the  terri- 
fied crowd,  in  the  midst  of  their  loud  declarations 
of  resignation  to  God's  guidance  and  their  pious 
prayers,  wrung  their  hands,  and  at  the  same  time 
how  painfully  anxious  each  one  was  to  hide  the  little 
property  he  had  saved,  first  from  the  disapproval  of 
his  companions,  and  then  from  the  covetousness  of 
the  approaching  enemy. 

With  Paulus  came  Sergius  and  Jeremias  to  whom, 
on  the  way,  he  had  spoken  words  of  encouragement. 
All  three  did  their  utmost  to  revive  the  confidence 
of  the  terrified  men,  and  when  the  Alexandrian  re- 
minded them,  how  zealously  each  of  them  only  a  few 
weeks  since  had  helped  to  roll  the  blocks  and  stones 
from  the  wall,  and  down  the  precipice,  so  as  to  crush 
and  slay  the  advancing  enemy,  the  feeling  was  strong 
in  many  of  them  that,  he  had  already  proved  himself 
worthy  in  defence,  it  was  due  to  him  now  to  make 
him  their  leader. 

The  number  of  the  men  who  rushed  out  of  the 


HOMO   SUM.  309 

tower  was  increasing,  and  when  Hernias  appeared 
with  his  father  on  his  back  and  followed  by  Miriam, 
and  when  Paulus  exhorted  his  companions  to  be 
edified  by  this  pathetic  picture  of  filial  love,  curiosity 
tempted  even  the  last  loiterers  in  the  tower  out  into 
the  open  space. 

The  Alexandrian  sprang  over  the  wall,  went  up 
to  Stephanus,  lifted  him  from  the  shoulders  of  the 
panting  youth  and,  taking  him  on  his  own,  carried 
him  towards  the  tower ;  but  the  old  warrior  refused 
to  enter  the  place  of  refuge,  and  begged  his  friend 
to  lay  him  down  by  the  wall.  Paulus  obeyed  his 
wish  and  then  went  with  Hermas  to  the  top  of  the 
tower  to  spy  the  distance  from  thence. 

As  soon  as  he  had  quitted  him,  Stephanus  turned 
to  the  anchorites  who  stood  near  him,  saying, 

"  These  stones  are  loose,  and  though  my  strength 
is  indeed  small,  still  it  is  great  enough  to  send  one 
of  them  over  with  a  push.  If  it  comes  to  a  battle 
my  old  soldier's  eyes,  dim  as  they  are  now,  may 
with  the  help  of  yours  see  many  things  that  may  be 
useful  to  you  young  ones.  Above  all  things,  if  the 
game  is  to  be  a  hot  one  for  the  robbers,  one  must 
command  here  whom  the  others  will  obey." 

"It  shall  be  you,  father,"  interrupted  Salathiel 
the  Syrian.  "  You  have  served  in  Caesar's  army, 
and  you  proved  your  courage  and  knowledge  of  war 
in  the  last  raid.  You  shall  command  us." 

Stephanus  sadly  shook  his  head  and  replied,  "  My 
voice  is  become  too  weak  and  low  since  this  wound 
in  my  breast  and  my  long  illness.  Xot  even  those 


3IO  HOMO   SUM. 

who  stand  nearest  to  me  would  understand  me  in 
the  noise  of  battle.  Let  Paulus  be  your  captain,  for 
he  is  strong,  cautious  and  brave." 

Many  of  the  anchorites  had  long  looked  upon  the 
Alexandrian  as  their  best  stay ;  for  many  years  he 
had  enjoyed  the  respect  of  all,  and  on  a  thousand 
occasions  had  given  proof  of  his  strength  and  pres- 
ence of  mind,  but  at  this  proposal  they  looked  at 
each  other  in  surprise,  doubt  and  disapproval. 

Stephanus  saw  what  was  passing  in  their  minds. 

"  It  is  true  he  has  erred  gravely,"  he  said.  "  And 
before  God  he  is  the  least  of  the  least  among  us ; 
but  in  animal  strength  and  indomitable  courage 
he  is  superior  to  3Tou  all.  Which  of  you  would  be 
willing  to  take  his  place,  if  you  reject  his  guid- 
ance." 

"  Orion  the  Saite,"  cried  one  of  the  anchorites, 
"  is  tall  and  strong.  If  he  would — " 

But  Orion  eagerly  excused  himself  from  assuming 
the  dangerous  office,  and  when  Andreas  and  Joseph 
also  refused  with  no  less  decision  the  leadership  that 
was  offered  them,  Stephanus  said, 

"  You  see  there  is  no  choice  left  us  but  to  beg  the 
Alexandrian  to  command  us  here  so  long  as  the  rob- 
bers threaten  us,  and  no  longer.  There  he  comes — 
shall  I  ask  him  ?  " 

A  murmur  of  consent,  though  by  no  means  of 
satisfaction,  answered  the  old  man,  and  Paulus,  quite 
carried  away  by  his  eagerness  to  stake  his  life  and 
blood  for  the  protection  of  the  weak,  and  fevered 
with  a  soldier's  ardor,  accepted  Stephanus'  cominis- 


HOMO   SUM.  311 

sion  as  a  matter  of  course,  and  set  to  work  like  a 
general  to  organize  the  helpless  wearers  of  sheep- 
skin. 

Some  he  sent  to  the  top  of  the  tower  to  keep 
watch,  others  he  charged  with  the  transport  of  the 
stones  ;  to  a  third  party  he  entrusted  the  duty  of 
hurling  pieces  of  rock  and  blocks  of  stone  down  into 
the  abyss  in  the  moment  of  danger ;  he  requested 
the  weaker  brethren  to  assemble  themselves  together, 
to  pray  for  the  others  and  to  sing  hymns  of  praise, 
and  he  concerted  signs  and  pass-words  with  all ;  he 
was  now  here,  now  there,  and  his  energy  and  con- 
fidence infused  themselves  even  into  the  faint- 
hearted. 

In  the  midst  of  these  arrangements  Hermas  took 
leave  of  him  and  of  his  father,  for  he  heard  the 
Roman  war-trumpets  and  the  drums  of  the  young 
manhood  of  Pharan,  as  they  marched  through  the 
short  cut  to  meet  the  enemy.  He  knew  where  the 
main  strength  of  the  Blemmyes  lay  and  communi- 
cated this  knowledge  to  the  Centurion  Phoebicius  and 
the  captain  of  the  Pharanites.  The  Gaul  put  a  few 
short  questions  to  Hermas,  whom  he  recognized  im- 
mediately, for  since  he  had  met  him  at  the  harbor 
of  Rai'thu  he  could  not  forget  his  eyes,  which  re- 
minded him  of  those  of  Glycera ;  and  after  receiv- 
ing his  hasty  and  decided  answers  he  issued  rapid 
and  prudent  orders. 

A  third  of  the  Pharanites  were  to  march  forward 
against  the  enemy,  drumming  and  trumpeting,  and 
then  retreat  as  far  as  the  watch-tower  as  the  enemy 


312  HOMO   SUM. 

approached  over  the  plain.  If  the  Blemmyes  allowed 
themselves  to  be  tempted  thither,  a  second  third  of 
the  warriors  of  the  oasis,  that  could  easily  lie  in  am- 
bush in  a  cross-valley,  were  to  fall  on  their  left  flank, 
while  Phoebicius  and  his  maniple — hidden  behind  the 
rock  on  which  the  castle  stood — would  suddenly 
rush  out  and  so  decide  the  battle.  The  last  third  of 
the  Pharanites  had  orders  to  destroy  the  ships  of  the 
invaders  under  the  command  of  Hermas,  who  knew 
the  spot  where  they  had  landed. 

In  the  worst  case  the  centurion  and  his  men  could 
retreat  into  the  castle,  and  there  defend  themselves 
till  the  warriors  of  the  nearest  seaports — whither 
messengers  were  already  on  their  way — should  come 
to  the  rescue. 

The  Gaul's  orders  were  immediately  obeyed,  and 
Hermas  walked  at  the  head  of  the  division  entrusted 
to  him,  as  proud  and  as  self-possessed  as  any  of 
Ca3sar's  veterans  leading  his  legion  into  the  field.  He 
carried  a  bow  and  arrows  at  his  back,  and  in  his 
hand  a  battle-axe  that  he  had  bought  at  Raithu. 

Miriam  attempted  to  follow  the  troops  he  was 
leading,  but  he  observed  her,  and  called  out,  "  Go 
up  to  the  fort,  child,  to  my  father."  And  the  shep- 
herdess obeyed  without  hesitation. 

The  anchorites  had  all  crowded  to  the  edge  of  the 
precipice,  they  looked  at  the  division  of  the  forces, 
and  signed  and  shouted  down.  They  had  hoped 
that  some  part  of  the  fighting  men  would  be  joined 
to  them  for  their  defence,  but,  as  they  soon  learned, 
they  had  hoped  in  vain.  Stephanus,  whose  feeble 


HOMO   SUM.  313 

sight  could  not  reach  so  far  as  the  plain  at  the  foot 
of  the  declivity,  made  Paulus  report  to  him  all  that 
was  going  on  there,  and  with  the  keen  insight  of  a 
soldier  he  comprehended  the  centurion's  plan.  The 
troop  led  by  Hermas  passed  by  below  the  tower,  and 
the  youth  waved  and  shouted  a  greeting  up  to  his 
father.  Stephanus,  whose  hearing  remained  sharper 
than  his  sight,  recognized  his  son's  voice  and  took 
leave  of  him  with  tender  and  loving  words  in  as  loud 
a  voice  as  he  could  command.  Paulus  collected  all 
the  overflow  of  the  old  man's  heart  in  one  sentence, 
and  called  out  his  blessings  through  his  two  hands 
as  a  speaking  trumpet,  after  his  friend's  son  as  he 
departed  to  battle.  Hermas  understood ;  but  deeply 
as  he  was  touched  by  this  farewell  he  answered  only 
by  dumb  signs.  A  father  can  find  a  hundred  words 
of  blessing  sooner  than  a  son  can  find  one  of  thanks. 

As  the  youth  disappeared  behind  the  rocks,  Paulus 
said, 

"  He  marches  on  like  an  experienced  soldier,  and 
the  others  follow  him  as  sheep  follow  a  ram.  But 
hark  ! — Certainly — the  foremost  division  of  the 
Pharanites  and  the  enemy  have  met.  The  outcry 
comes  nearer  and  nearer." 

"  Then  all  will  be  well,"  cried  Stephanus  excitedly. 
"  If  they  only  take  the  bait  and  let  themselves  be 
drawn  on  to  the  plateau  I  think  they  are  lost.  From 
here  we  can  watch  the  whole  progress  of  the  battle, 
and  if  our  side  are  driven  back  it  may  easily  happen 
that  they  will  throw  themselves  into  the  castle. 
Now  not  a  pebble  must  be  thrown  in  vain,  for  if  our 


314  HOMO  SUM* 

tower  becomes  the  central-point  of  the  struggle  the 
defenders  will  need  stones  to  fling." 

These  words  were  heard  by  several  of  the  ancho- 
rites, and  as  now  the  war-cries  and  the  noise  of  the 
fight  came  nearer  and  nearer,  and  one  and  another 
repeated  to  each  other  that  their  place  of  refuge 
would  become  the  centre  of  the  combat,  the  fright- 
ened penitents  quitted  the  posts  assigned  to  them  by 
Paulus,  ran  hither  and  thither  in  spite  of  the  Alex- 
andrian's severe  prohibition,  and  most  of  them  at 
last  joined  the  company  of  the  old  and  feeble,  whose 
psalms  grew  more  and  more  lamentable  as  danger 
pressed  closer  upon  them. 

Loudest  of  all  was  the  wailing  of  the  Sa'ite  Orion, 
who  cried  with  uplifted  hands, 

"What  wilt  Thou  of  us  miserable  creatures,  O 
Lord  ?  When  Moses  left  Thy  chosen  people  on  this 
very  spot  for  only  forty  days,  they  at  once  fell  away 
from  Thee ;  and  we,  we  without  any  leader  have 
spent  all  our  life  in  Thy  service,  and  have  given  up 
all  that  can  rejoice  the  heart,  and  have  taken  every 
kind  of  suffering  upon  us  to  please  Thee  !  and  now 
these  hideous  heathen  are  surging  round  us  again, 
and  will  kill  us.  Is  this  the  reward  of  victory  for 
our  striving  and  our  long  wrestling  ?  " 

The  rest  joined  in  the  lamentation  of  the  Sa'ite, 
but  Paulus  stepped  into  their  midst,  blamed  them 
for  their  cowardice,  and  with  warm  and  urgent 
speech  implored  them  to  return  to  their  posts  so 
that  the  wall  might  be  guarded  at  least  on  the 
eastern  and  more  accessible  side,  and  that  the  castle 


HOMO   SUM.  315 

might  not  fall  an  easy  prey  into  the  hands  of  an 
enemy  from  whom  no  quarter  was  to  be  expected. 
Some  of  the  anchorites  were  already  proceeding  to 
obey  the  Alexandrian's  injunction,  when  a  fearful 
cry,  the  Avar-cry  of  the  Blemmyes,  who  were  in  pur- 
suit of  the  Pharanites,  rose  from  the  foot  of  their 
rock  of  refuge. 

They  crowded  together  again  in  terror  ;  Salathiel 
the  Syrian,  had  ventured  to  the  edge  of  the  abyss, 
and  had  looked  over  old  Stephanus'  shoulder  down 
into  the  hollow,  and  when  he  rushed  back  to  his 
companions,  crying  in  terror, "  Our  men  are  flying  !  " 
Gelasius  shrieked  aloud,  beat  his  breast,  and  tore 
his  rough  black  hair,  crying  out, 

"  O  Lord  God,  Avhat  wilt  Thou  of  us  ?  Is  it  vain 
then  to  strive  after  righteousness  and  virtue  that 
Thou  givest  us  over  unto  death,  and  dost  not  fight 
for  us  ?  If  we  are  overcome  by  the  heathen,  ungod- 
liness and  brute  force  will  boast  themselves  as  though 
they  had  won  the  victory  over  righteousness  and 
truth ! " 

Paulus  had  turned  from  the  lamenting  hermits, 
perplexed  and  beside  himself,  and  stood  with  Ste- 
phanus watching  the  fight. 

The  Blemmyes  had  come  in  great  numbers,  and 
their  attack,  before  which  the  Pharanites  were  to 
have  retired  as  a  feint,  fell  with  such  force  upon  the 
foremost  division  that  they  and  their  comrades,  who 
had  rushed  to  their  aid  on  the  plateau,  were  unable 
to  resist  it,  and  were  driven  back  as  far  as  the  spot 
where  the  ravine  narrowed. 


316  HOMO  SUM. 

"Things  are  not  as  they  should  be,"  said  Ste- 
phanus. 

"  And  the  cowardly  band,  like  a  drove  of  cattle," 
cried  Paulus  in  a  fury,  "  leave  the  walls  unprotected, 
and  blaspheme  God  instead  of  watching  or  fight- 
ing." 

The  anchorites  noticed  his  gestures,  which  were 
indeed  those  of  a  desperate  man,  and  Sergius  ex- 
claimed, 

"  Are  we  then  wholly  abandoned  ?  Why  does 
not  the  thorn-bush  light  its  fires,  and  destroy  the 
evil-doers  with  its  flames  ?  Why  is  the  thunder 
silent,  and  where  are  the  lightnings  that  played 
round  the  peak  of  Sinai  ?  Why  does  not  darkness 
fall  upon  us  to  affright  the  heathen?  Why  does 
not  the  earth  open  her  mouth  to  swallow  them  up 
like  the  company  of  Korah  ?  " 

"  The  Might  of  God,"  cried  Dulas,  "  tarries  too 
long.  The  Lord  must  set  our  piety  in  a  doubtful 
light,  for  He  treats  us  as  though  we  were  unworthy 
of  all  care." 

"  And  that  you  are  !  "  exclaimed  Paulus,  who  had 
heard  the  last  words,  and  who  was  dragging  rather 
than  leading  the  feeble  Stephanus  to  the  unguarded 
eastern  wall.  "  That  you  are,  for  instead  of  resist- 
ing His  enemies  you  blaspheme  God,  and  disgrace 
yourselves  by  your  miserable  cowardice.  Look  at 
this  sick  old  man  who  is  prepared  to  defend  you, 
and  obey  my  orders  without  a  murmur,  or  by  the 
holy  martyrs,  I  will  drag  you  to  your  posts  by  your 
hair  and  ears,  and  will — " 


HOMO   SUM.  317 

But  he  ceased  speaking,  for  his  threats  were  inter- 
rupted by  a  powerful  voice  which  called  his  name 
from  the  foot  of  the  wall. 

"  That  is  Agapitus,"  exclaimed  Stephanus.  "  Lead 
me  to  the  wall,  and  set  me  down  there." 

Before  Paulus  could  accede  to  his  friend's  wish 
the  tall  form  of  the  bishop  was  standing  by  his 
side. 

Agapitus  the  Cappadocian  had  in  his  youth  been  a 
warrior ;  he  had  hardly  passed  the  limits  of  middle 
age,  and  was  a  vigilant  captain  of  his  congregation. 
When  all  the  youth  of  Pharan  had  gone  forth  to 
meet  the  Blemmyes,  he  had  no  peace  in  the  oasis, 
'  and,  after  enjoining  on  the  presbyters  and  deacons 
that  they  should  pray  in  the  church  for  the  fighting 
men  with  the  women  and  the  men  who  remained 
behind,  he  himself,  accompanied  by  a  guide  and  two 
acolytes,  had  gone  up  the  mountain  to  witness  the 
battle. 

To  the  other  priests  and  his  wife  who  sought  to 
detain  him,  he  had  answered,  "  Where  the  flock  is 
there  should  the  shepherd  be !  " 

Unseen  and  unheard  he  had  gained  the  castle-wall 
and  had  been  a  witness  to  Paulus'  vehement  speech. 
He  now  stood  opposite  the  Alexandrian  with  rolling 
eyes,  and  threateningly  lifted  his  powerful  hand  as  he 
called  out  to  him  : 

"  And  dare  an  outcast  speak  thus  to  his  brethren  ? 
Will  the  champion  of  Satan  give  orders  to  the  sol- 
diers of  the  Lord  ?  It  would  indeed  be  a  joy  to  you 
if  by  your  strong  arm  you  could  win  back  the  good 


318  HOMO   SUM. 

name  that  your  soul,  crippled  by  sin  and  guilt,  has 
flung  away.  Come  on,  my  friends !  the  Lord  is  with 
us  and  will  help  us." 

Paulus  had  let  the  bishop's  words  pass  over  him- 
in  silence,  and  raised  his  hands  like  the  other  ancho- 
rites when  Agapitus  stepped  into  their  midst,  and 
uttered  a  short  and  urgent  prayer. 

After  the  "  Amen  "  the  bishop  pointed  out,  like  a 
general,  to  each  man,  even  to  the  feeble  and  aged, 
his  place  by  the  wall  or  behind  the  stones  for  throw- 
ing, and  then  cried  out  with  a  clear  ringing  voice 
that  sounded  above  all  other  noise,  "  Show  to-day 
that  you  are  indeed  soldiers  of  the  Most  High." 

Not  one  rebelled,  and  when  man  by  man  each  had 
placed  himself  at  his  post,  he  went  to  the  precipice 
and  looked  attentively  down  at  the  fight  that  was 
raging  below. 

The  Pharanites  were  now  opposing  the  attack  of 
the  Blemmyes  with  success,  for  Phoebicius,  rushing 
forward  with  his  men  from  their  ambush,  had  fallen 
upon  the  compact  mass  of  the  sons  of  the  desert  in 
flank  and,  spreading  death  and  ruin,  had  divided 
them  into  two  bodies.  The  well-trained  and  well- 
armed  Romans  seemed  to  have  an  easy  task  with 
their  naked  opponents,  who,  in  a  hand  to  hand  fight, 
could  not  avail  themselves  of  either  their  arrows  or 
their  spears.  But  the  Blemmyes  had  learned  to  use 
their  strength  in  frequent  battles  with  the  imperial 
troops,  and  so  soon  as  they  perceived  that  they  were 
no  match  for  their  enemies  in  pitched  battle,  their 
leaders  set  up  a  strange  shrill  cry,  their  ranks  dis- 


HOMO  SUM.  319 

solved,  and  they  dispersed  in  all  directions,  like  a 
heap  of  feathers  strewn  by  a  gust  of  wind. 

Agapitus  took  the  hasty  disappearance  of  the 
enemy  for  wild  flight,  he  sighed  deeply  and  thank- 
fully and  turned  to  go  down  to  the  field  of  battle, 
and  to  speak  consolation  to  his  wounded  fellow  Chris- 
tians. 

But  in  the  castle  itself  he  found,  opportunity  for 
exercising  his  pious  office,  for  before  him  stood 
the  shepherdess  whom  he  had  already  observed  on 
his  arrival,  and  she  said  with  much  embarrassment, 
but  clearly  and  quickly,  "  Old  Stephanus  there,  my 
lord  bishop — Hernias'  father  for  whom  I  carry  water 
— bids  me  ask  you  to  come  to  him,  for  his  wound 
has  reopened  and  he  thinks  his  end  is  near." 

Agapitus  immediately  obeyed  this  call ;  he  went 
with  hasty  steps  towards  the  sick  man,  whose  wound 
Paulus  and  Orion  had  already  bound  up,  and  greeted 
him  with  a  familiarity  that  he  was  far  from  show- 
ing to  the  other  penitents.  He  had  long  known  the 
former  name  and  the  fate  of  Stephanus,  and  it  was 
by  his  advice  that  Hermas  had  been  obliged  to  join 
the  deputation  sent  to  Alexandria,,  for  Agapitus  was 
of  opinion  that  no  one  ought  to  flee  from  the  battle 
of  life  without  having  first  taken  some  part  in  it. 

Stephanus  put  out  his  hand  to  the  bishop,  who  sat 
down  beside  him,  signed  to  the  bystanders  to  leave 
them  alone,  and  listened  attentively  to  the  feeble 
words  of  the  sufferer.  "When  he  had  ceased  speak- 
ing, Agapitus  said, 

"  I  praise  the  Lord  with  you  for  having  permitted 


32O  HOMO   SUM. 

your  lost  wife  to  find  the  ways  that  lead  to  Him, 
and  your  son  will  be — as  you  were  once — a  valiant 
man  of  war.  Tour  earthly  house  is  set  in  order, 
but  are  you  prepared  for  the  other,  the  everlasting 
mansion  ? " 

"For  eighteen  years  I  have  done  penance,  and 
prayed,  and  borne  great  sufferings,"  answered  the 
sick  man.  "  The  world  lies  far  behind  me,  and  I 
hope  I  am  walking  in  the  path  that  leads  to  Heaven." 

"  So  do  I  hope  for  you  and  for  your  soul,"  said 
the  bishop.  "  That  which  it  is  hardest  to  endure 
has  fallen  to  your  lot  in  this  world,  but  have  you 
striven  to  forgive  those  who  did  you  the  bitterest 
wrong,  and  can  you  pray,  '  Forgive  us  our  sins  as 
we  forgive  them  that  sin  against  us  ? '  Do  you  re- 
member the  words,  'If  ye  forgive  men  their  tres- 
passes, your  heavenly  Father  will  also  forgive  you '  ? " 

"  Not  only  have  I  pardoned  Glycera,"  answered 
Stephanus,  "  but  I  have  taken  her  again  into  my 
heart  of  hearts;  but  the  man  who  basely  seduced 
her,  the  wretch,  who  although  I  had  done  him  a 
thousand  benefits,  betrayed  me,  robbed  me  and  dis- 
honored me,  I  wish  him — 

"  Forgive  him,"  cried  Agapitus,  "  as  you  would 
be  forgiven." 

"  I  have  striven  these  eighteen  years  to  bless  my 
enemy,"  replied  Stephanus,  "and  I  will  still  con- 
tinue to  strive — 

Up  to  this  moment  the  bishop  had  devoted  his 
whole  attention  to  the  sick  anchorite,  but  he  was 
now  called  on  all  sides  at  once,  and  Gelasius,  who 


HOMO   SUM.  321 

\ 

toras  standing  by  the  declivity  with  some  other  anch- 
orites, called  out  to  him, 

"  Father — save  us — the  heathen  there  are  climb- 
ing up  the  rocks." 

Agapitus  signed  a  blessing  over  Stephanus  and 
then  turned  away  from  him,  saying  earnestly  once 
more,^ "  Forgive,  and  Heaven  is  open  to  you." 

Many  wounded  and  dead  lay  on  the  plain,  and 
the  Pharanites  were  retreating  into  the  ravine,  for 
the  Blemmyes  had  not  indeed  fled,  but  had  only  dis- 
persed themselves,  and  then  had  climbed  up  the 
rocks  which  hemmed  in  the  level  ground  and  shot 
their  arrows  at  their  enemies  from  thence. 

"  Where  are  the  Romans  ? "  Agapitus  eagerly  in- 
quired of  Orion. 

"  They  are  withdrawing  into  the  gorge  through 
which  the  road  leads  up  here,"  answered  the  Sa'ite. 
"  But  look  !  only  look  at  these  heathen  !  The  Lord 
be  merciful  to  us !  they  are  climbing  up  the  cliffs 
like  woodpeckers  up  a  tree." 

"  The  stones,  fly  to  the  stones  !  "  cried  Agapitus 
with  flashing  eyes  to  the  anchorites  that  stood  by. 
"  "What  is  going  on  behind  the  wall  there  ?  Do  you 
hear  ?  Yes — that  is  the  Roman  tuba.  Courage, 
brethren  !  the  Emperor's  soldiers  are  guarding  the 
weakest  side  of  the  castle.  But  look  here  at  the 
naked  figures  in  the  cleft.  Bring  the  blocks  here ; 
set  your  shoulders  stoutly  to  it,  Orion !  one  more 
push,  Salathiel !  There  it  goes,  it  crashes  down — 
If  only  it  does  not  stick  in  the  rift !  No !  thank 
God,  it  has  bounded  off — that  was  a  leap !  "Well 

21 


322  HOMO   SUM. 

done — there  were  six  enemies  of  the  Lord  destroyed 
at  once." 

"  I  see  three  more  yonder,"  cried  Orion.  "  Come 
here,  Damianus,  and  help  me." 

The  man  he  called  rushed  forward  with  several 
others,  and  the  first  success  raised  the  courage  of 
the  anchorites  so  rapidly  and  wonderfully  that  the 
bishop  soon  found  it  difficult  to  restrain  their  zeal, 
and  to  persuade  them  to  be  sparing  Avith  the  precious 
missiles. 

While,  under  the  direction  of  Agapitus,  stone  after 
stone  was  hurled  clattering  over  the  steep  precipice 
down  upon  the  Blemmyes,  Paulus  sat  by  the  sick 
man,  looking  at  the  ground. 

"  You  are  not  helping  them  ?  "  asked  Stephanus. 

"  Agapitus  is  right,"  replied  the  Alexandrian.  "  I 
have  much  to  expiate,  and  fighting  brings  enjoyment. 
How  great  enjoyment  I  can  understand  by  the  torture 
it  is  to  me  to  sit  still.  The  bishop  blessed  you  affec- 
tionately." 

"  I  am  near  the  goal,"  sighed  Stephanus,  "  and  he 
promises  me  the  joys  of  Heaven  if  I  only  forgive 
him  who  stole  my  wife  from  me.  He  is  forgiven— 
yes,  all  is  forgiven  him,  and  may  everything  that  he 
undertakes  turn  to  good ;  yea,  and  nothing  turn  to 
evil — only  feel  how  my  heart  throbs,  it  is  rallying 
its  strength  once  more  before  it  utterly  ceases  to 
beat.  When  it  is  all  over  repeat  to  Hermas  every- 
thing that  I  have  told  you,  and  bless  him  a  thousand, 
thousand  times  in  my  name  and  his  mother's  ;  but 
never,  never  tell  him  that  in  an  hour  of  weakness 


HOMO   SUM.  323 

she  ran  away  with  that  villain — that  man,  that 
miserable  man  I  mean — whom  I  forgive.  Give 
Hennas  this  ring,  and  with  it  the  letter  that  you 
will  find  under  the  dry  herbs  on  the  couch  in  my 
cave ;  they  will  secure  him  a  reception  from  his 
uncle,  who  will  also  procure  him  a  place  in  the  army, 
for  my  brother  is  in  high  favor  with  Caesar.  Only 
listen  how  Agapitus  urges  on  our  men ;  they  are 
fighting  bravely  there ;  that  is  the  Roman  tuba. 
Attend  to  me — the  maniple  will  occupy  the  castle 
and  shoot  down  on  the  heathen  from  thence  ;  when 
they  come  carry  me  into  the  tower.  I  am  weak  and 
would  fain  collect  my  thoughts,  and  pray  once  more 
that  I  may  find  strength  to  forgive  the  man  not  with 
my  lips  only." 

"  Down  there  see — there  come  the  Eomans,"  cried 
Paulus  interrupting  him.  "  Here,  up  here !  "  he 
called  down  to  the  men,  "  The  steps  are  more  to  the 
left." 

"  Here  we  are,"  answered  a  sharp  voice.  "  You 
stay  there,  you  people,  on  that  projection  of  rock, 
and  keep  your  eye  on  the  castle.  If  any  danger 
threatens  call  me  with  the  trumpet.  I  will  climb  up, 
and  from  the  top  of  the  tower  there  I  can  see  where 
the  dogs  come  from." 

During  this  speech  Stephanus  had  looked  down 
and  listened ;  when  a  few  minutes  later  the  Gaul 
reached  the  wall  and  called  out  to  the  men  inside, 
"  Is  there  no  one  there  who  will  give  me  a  hand  ? " 
he  turned  to  Paulus,  saying,  "  Lift  rne  up  and  support 
me — quick  I " 


324  HOMO   SUM. 

"With  an  agility  that  astonished  the  Alexandrian, 
Stephanus  stood  upon  his  feet,  leaned  over  the  wall 
towards  the  centurion — who  had  climbed  as  far  as  the 
outer  foot  of  it,  looked  him  in  the  face  with  eager 
attention,  shuddered  violently,  and  repressing  his 
feelings  with  the  utmost  effort  offered  him  his  lean 
hand  to  help  him. 

"  Servianus  !  "  cried  the  centurion,  who  was  greatly 
shocked  by  such  a  meeting  and  in  such  a  place,  and 
who,  struggling  painfully  for  composure,  stared  first 
at  the  old  man  and  then  at  Paulus. 

Not  one  of  the  three  succeeded  in  uttering  a  word  ; 
but  Stephanas'  eyes  were  fixed  on  the  Gaul's  features, 
and  the  longer  he  looked  at  him  the  hollower  grew 
his  cheeks  and  the  paler  his  lips ;  at  the  same  time  he 
still  held  out  his  hand  to  the  other,  perhaps  in  token 
of  forgiveness. 

So  passed  a  long  minute.  Then  Phcebicius  recol- 
lected that  he  had  climbed  the  wall  in  the  Emper- 
or's service,  and  stamping  with  impatience  at  him- 
self he  took  the  old  man's  hand  in  a  hasty  grasp. 
But  scarcely  had  Stephanus  felt  the  touch  of  the 
Gaul's  fingers  when  he  started  as  struck  by  light- 
ning, and  flung  himself  with  a  hoarse  cry  on  his 
enemy  who  was  hanging  on  the  edge  of  the  wall. 

Paulus  gazed  in  horror  at  the  frightful  scene,  and 
cried  aloud  with  fervent  unction,  "  Let  him  go — 
forgive  that  Heaven  may  forgive  you." 

"  Heaven  !  what  is  Heaven,  what  is  forgiveness !  " 
screamed  the  old  man.  "  He  shall  be  damned." 

Before  the  Alexandrian  could  hinder  him,  the 


HOMO   SUM.  325 

loose  stone  over  which  the  enemies  were  wrestling 
in  breathless  combat  gave  way,  and  both  were  hurled 
into  the  abyss  with  the  falling  rock. 

Paulus  groaned  from  the  lowest  depth  of  his  breast 
and  murmured  while  the  tears  ran  down  his  cheeks, 
"  He  too  has  fought  the  fight,  and  he  too  has  striven 
in  vain." 


326  HOMO   SUM, 


CHAPTEE  X. 

THE  fight  was  ended  ;  the  sun  as  it  went  to  its 
rest  behind  the  Holy  Mountain  had  lighted  many 
corpses  of  Blemmyes,  and  now  the  stars  shone  down 
on  the  oasis  from  the  clear  sky. 

Hymns  of  praise  sounded  out  of  the  church,  and 
near  it,  under  the  hill  against  which  it  was  built, 
torches  were  blazing  and  threw  their  ruddy  light  on 
a  row  of  biers,  on  which  under  green  palm-branches 
lay  the  heroes  who  had  fallen  in  the  battle  against 
the  Blemmyes. 

Now  the  hymn  ceased,  the  gates  of  the  house  of 
God  opened  and  Agapitus  led  his  followers  towards 
the  dead.  The  congregation  gathered  in  a  half- 
circle  round  their  peaceful  brethren,  and  heard  the 
blessing  that  their  pastor  pronounced  over  the  noble 
victims  who  had  shed  their  blood  in  fighting  the 
heathen.  When  it  was  ended  those  who  in  life  had 
been  their  nearest  and  dearest  went  up  to  the  dead, 
and  many  tears  fell  into  the  sand  from  the  e}Te  of 
a  mother  or  a  wife,  many  a  sigh  went  up  to  heaven 
from  a  father's  breast.  Next  to  the  bier,  on  which 
old  Stephanus  was  resting,  stood  another  and  a 
smaller  one,  and  between  the  two  Hernias  knelt  and 


HOMO  SUM.  327 

wept.      He  raised  his  face,  for  a  deep  and  kindly 
voice  spoke  his  name. 

"  Petrus,"  said  the  lad,  clasping  the  hand  that  the 
Senator  held  out  to  him,  "  I  felt  forced  and  driven 
out  into  the  world,  and  away  from  my  father — and 
now  he  is  gone  forever  how  gladly  I  would  have 
been  kept  by  him." 

"  He  died  a  noble  death,  in  battle  for  those  he 
loved,"  said  the  Senator  consolingly. 
,  "  Paulus  was  near  him  when  he  fell,"  replied  Her- 
nias. "  My  father  fell  from  the  wall  while  defend- 
ing the  tower  ;  but  look  here,  this  girl — poor  child — 
who  used  to  keep  your  goats,  died  like  a  heroine. 
Poor,  wild  Miriam,  how  kind  I  would  be  to  you  if 
only  you  were  alive  now  !  " 

Hermas  as  he  spoke  stroked  the  arm  of  the  shepherd- 
ess, pressed  a  kiss  on  her  small,  cold  hand,  and  softly 
folded  it  with  the  other  across  her  bosom. 

"  How  did  the  girl  get  into  the  battle  with  the 
men  ? "  asked  Petrus.  "  But  you  can  tell  me  that  in 
my  own  house.  Come  and  be  our  guest  as  long  as 
it  pleases  you,  and  until  you  go  forth  into  the  world ; 
thanks  are  due  to  you  from  us  all." 

Hermas  blushed  and  modestly  declined  the  praises 
which  were  showered  on  him  on  all  sides  as  the 
saviour  of  the  oasis.  When  the  wailing  women  ap- 
peared he  knelt  once  more  at  the  head  of  his  father's 
bier,  cast  a  last  loving  look  at  Miriam's  peaceful 
face,  and  then  followed  his  host. 

The  man  and  boy  crossed  the  court  together. 
Hermas  involuntarily  glanced  up  at  the  window 


328  HOMO   SUM. 

where  more  than  once  he  had  seen  Sirona,  and  said, 
as  he  pointed  to  the  centurion's  house,  "He  too 
fell." 

Petrus  nodded  and  opened  the  door  of  his  house. 
In  the  hall,  which  was  lighted  up,  Dorothea  came 
hastily  to  meet  him,  asking,  "  No  news  yet  of  Poly- 
karp  ? " 

Her  husband  shook  his  head,  and  she  added, 
"  How  indeed  is  it  possible  ?  He  will  write  at  the 
soonest  from  Klysma  or  perhaps  even  from  Alex- 
andria." 

"  That  is  just  what  I  think,"  replied  Petrus,  look- 
ing down  to  the  ground.  Then  he  turned  to  Her- 
mas  and  introduced  him  to  his  wife. 

Dorothea  received  the  young  man  with  warm 
sympathy ;  she  had  heard  that  his  father  had  fallen 
in  the  fight,  and  ho\v  nobly  he  too  had  distinguished 
himself.  Supper  was  ready,  and  Hermas  was  in- 
vited to  share  it.  The  mistress  gave  her  daughter  a 
sign  to  make  preparations  for  their  guest,  but  Petrus 
detained  Marthana,  and  said,  "  Hermas  may  fill  An- 
tonius'  place ;  he  has  still  something  to  do  with  some 
of  the  workmen.  Where  are  Jethro  and  the  house- 
slaves  ? " 

"  They  have  already  eaten,"  said  Dorothea. 

The  husband  and  wife  looked  at  each  other,  and 
Petrus  said  with  a  melancholy  smile,  "I  believe 
they  are  up  on  the  mountain." 

Dorothea  wiped  a  tear  from  her  eye  as  she  replied, 
"They  will  meet  Antonius  there.  If  only  they 
could  find  Polykarp !  And  yet  I  honestly  say — not 


HOMO  SUM.  329 

merely  to  comfort  you — it  is  most  probable  that  he 
has  not  met  with  any  accident  in  the  mountain 
gorges,  but  has  gone  to  Alexandria  to  escape  the 
memories  that  follow  him  here  at  every  step. — Was 
not  that  the  gate  ? " 

She  rose  quickly  and  looked  into  the  court,  while 
Petrus,  who  had  followed  her,  did  the  same,  saying 
with  a  deep  sigh,  as  he  turned  to  Marthana — who, 
while  she  offered  meat  and  bread  to  Hernias  was 
watching  her  parents — "  It  was  only  the  slave  Anu- 
bis." 

For  some  time  a  painful  silence  reigned  round  the 
large  table,  to-day  so  sparely  furnished  with  guests. 

At  last  Petrus  turned  to  his  guest  and  said,  "  You 
were  to  tell  me  how  the  shepherdess  Miriam  lost 
her  life  in  the  struggle.  She  had  run  away  from 
our  house — " 

"  Up  the  mountain,"  added  Hermas.  "  She  sup- 
plied my  poor  father  with  water  like  a  daughter." 

"  You  see,  mother,"  interrupted  Marthana,  "  she 
was  not  bad-hearted  ;  I  always  said  so." 

"  This  morning,"  continued  Hermas,  nodding  in 
sad  assent  to  the  maiden,  "  she  followed  my  father 
to  the  castle,  and  immediately  after  his  fall,  Paulus 
told  me,  she  rushed  away  from  it,  but  only  to  seek 
me,  and  to  bring  me  the  sad  news.  We  had  known 
each  other  a  long  time,  for  years  she  had  watered 
her  goats  at  our  well,  and  while  I  was  still  quite  a 
boy  and  she  a  little  girl,  she  would  listen  for  hours 
when  I  played  on  my  willow-pipe  the  songs  which 
Paulus  had  taught  me.  As  long  as  I  played  she  was 


330  HOMO   SUM. 

perfectly  quiet,  and  when  I  ceased  she  wanted  to 
hear  more  and  still  more,  until  I  had  had  too  much 
of  it  and  went  away.  Then  she  would  grow  angry, 
and  if  I  would  not  do  her  will  she  would  scold  me 
with  bad  words.  But  she  always  came  again,  and 
as  I  had  no  other  companion  and  she  was  the  only 
creature  who  cared  to  listen  to  me,  I  was  very  well 
content  that  she  should  prefer  our  well  to  all  the 
others.  Then  we  grew  older  and  I  began  to  be 
afraid  of  her,  for  she  would  talk  in  such  a  godless 
way — and  she  even  died  a  heathen.  Paulus,  who 
once  overheard  us,  warned  me  against  her,  and  as  I 
had  long  thrown  away  the  pipe  and  hunted  beasts 
with  my  bow  and  arrow  whenever  my  father  would 
let  me,  I  was  with  her  for  shorter  intervals  when  I 
went  to  the  well  to  draw  water,  and  we  became 
more  and  more  strangers ;  indeed,  I  could  be  quite 
hard  to  her.  Only  once  after  I  came  back  from  the 
capital  something  happened — but  that  I  need  not 
tell  you.  The  poor  child  was  so  unhappy  at  being  a 
slave,  and  no  doubt  had  first  seen  the  light  in  a  free 
house. 

"  She  was  fond  of  me,  more  than  a  sister  is  of  a 
brother — and  when  my  father  was  dead  she  felt  that 
I  ought  not  to  learn  the  news  from  any  one  but  her- 
self. She  had  seen  which  way  I  had  gone  with  the 
Pharanites  and  followed  me  up,  and  she  soon  found 
me,  for  she  had  the  eyes  of  a  gazelle  and  the  ears  of 
a  startled  bird.  It  was  not  this  time  difficult  to  find 
me,  for  when  she  sought  me  we  were  fighting  with 
the  Blemmyes  in  the  green  hollow  that  leads  from 


HOMO   SUM.  331 

the  mountain  to  the  sea.  They  roared  with  fury 
like  wild  beasts,  for  before  we  could  get  to  the  sea 
the  fishermen  in  the  little  town  below  had  discovered 
their  boats,  which  they  had  hidden  under  sand  and 
stones,  and  had  carried  them  off  to  their  harbor.  The 
boy  from  Rai'thu  who  accompanied  me,  had  by  my 
orders  kept  them  in  sight,  and  had  led  the  fishermen 
to  the  hiding  place.  The  watchmen  whom  they  had 
left  with  the  boats  had  fled,  and  had  reached  their 
companions  who  were  fighting  round  the  castle,  and 
at  least  two  hundred  of  them  had  been  sent  back  to 
the  shore  to  recover  possession  of  the  boats  and  to 
punish  the  fishermen.  This  troop  met  us  in  the 
green  valley,  and  there  we  fell  to  fighting. 

"  The  Blemmyes  outnumbered  us ;  they  soon  sur- 
rounded us  before  and  behind,  on  the  right  side  and 
on  the  left,  for  they  jumped  and  climbed  from  rock 
to  rock  like  mountain-goats  and  then  shot  down  their 
reed-arrows  from  above.  Three  or  four  touched  me, 
and  one  pierced  my  hair  and  remained  hanging  in  it 
with  the  feather  at  the  end  of  the  shaft. 

"  How  the  battle  went  elsewhere  I  cannot  tell  you, 
for  the  blood  mounted  to  my  head,  and  I  was  only 
conscious  that  I  myself  snorted  and  shouted  like  a 
madman  and  wrestled  with  the  heathen  now  here 
and  now  there,  and  more  than  once  lifted  my  axe  to 
cleave  a  skull.  At  the  same  time  I  saw  a  part  of  our 
men  turn  to  fly,  and  I  called  them  back  with  furious 
words  ;  then  they  turned  round  and  followed  me 
again. 

"  Once,  in  the  midst  of  the  struggle,  I  saw  Miriam 


332  HOMO   SUM. 

too,  clinging  pale  and  trembling  to  a  rock  and 
looking  on  at  the  fight.  I  shouted  to  her  to  leave 
the  spot,  and  go  back  to  my  father,  but  she  stood 
still  and  shook  her  head  with  a  gesture — a  ges- 
ture so  full  of  pity  and  anguish — I  shall  never  forget 
it.  With  hands  and  eyes  she'  signed  to  me  that  my 
father  was  dead,  and  I  understood  ;  at  least  I  under- 
stood that  some  dreadful  misfortune  had  happened. 
I  had  no  time  for  reflection,  for  before  I  could 
gain  any  certain  information  by  word  of  mouth,  a 
captain  of  the  heathen  had  seized  me,  and  we  came  to 
a  life  and  death  struggle  before  Miriam's  very  eyes. 
My  opponent  was  strong,  but  I  showed  the  girl — 
who  had  often  taunted  me  for  being  a  weakling 
because  I  obeyed  my  father  in  everything — that  I 
need  yield  to  no  one.  I  could  not  have  borne  to  be 
vanquished  before  her  and  I  flung  the  heathen  to  the 
ground  and  slew  him  with  my  axe.  I  was  only 
vaguely  conscious  of  her  presence,  for  during  my 
severe  struggle  I  could  see  nothing  but  my  adversary. 
But  suddenly  I  heard  a  loud  scream,  and  Miriam 
sank,  bleeding  close  before  me.  While  I  was  kneel- 
ing over  his  comrade  one  of  the  Blemmeys  had  crept 
up  to  me,  and  had  flung  his  lance  at  me  from  a  few 
paces  off.  But  Miriam — Miriam— 

"  She  saved  you  at  the  cost  of  her  own  life,"  said 
Petrus,  completing  the  lad?s  sentence,  for  at  the 
recollection  of  the  occurrence  his  voice  had  failed  and 
his  eyes  overflowed  with  tears. 

Hernias  nodded  assent,  and  then  added  softly, 
"  She  threw  up  her  arms  and  called  my  name  as 


HOMO  SUM.  333 

the  spear  struck  her.  The  eldest  son  of  Obedianus 
punished  the  heathen  that  had  done  it,  and  I  supported 
her  as  she  fell  dying  and  took  her  curly  head  on  my 
knees  and  spoke  her  name ;  she  opened  her  eyes  once 
more,  and  spoke  mine  softly  and  with  indescribable 
tenderness.  I  had  never  thought  that  wild  Miriam 
could  speak  so  sweetly,  I  was  overcome  with  terrible 
grief,  and  kissed  her  eyes  and  her  lips.  She  looked 
at  me  once  more  with  a  long,  wide-open,  blissful 
gaze,  and  then  she  was  dead." 

"  She  was  a  heathen,"  said  Dorothea,  drying  her 
eyes,  "  but  for  such  a  death  the  Lord  will  forgive 
her  much." 

"  I  loved  her  dearly,"  said  Marthana,  "  and  will  lay 
my  sweetest  flowers  on  her  grave.  May  I  cut  some 
sprays  from  your  blooming  myrtle  for  a  wreath  ?  " 

lt  To-morrow,  to-morroAV,  my  child,"  replied  Doro- 
thea. "  Now  go  to  rest ;  it  is  already  very  late." 

"  Only  let  me  stay  till  Antonius  and  Jethro  come 
back,"  begged  the  girl. 

"  I  would  willingly  help  you  to  find  your  son," 
said  Hernias ,  "  and  if  you  wish  I  will  go  to  Rai'thu 
and  Klysma,  and  inquire  among  the  fishermen. 
Had  the  centurion — ''  and  as  he  spoke  the  young 
soldier  looked  down  in  some  embarrassment,  "  had 
the  centurion  found  his  fugitive  wife  of  whom  he 
was  in  pursuit  with  Talib  the  Amalekite,  before  he 
died?" 

"  Sirona  has  not  yet  reappeared,"  replied  Petrus, 
"and  perhaps — but  just  now  you  mentioned  the 
name  of  Paulus,  who  was  so  dear  to  you  and  your 


334  HOMO  SUM. 

father.  Do  you  know  that  it  was  he  who  so  shame- 
lesly  ruined  the  domestic  peace  of  the  centurion  ?" 

"  Paulus !  "  cried  Hernias.  "  How  can  you  be- 
lieve it  ? " 

"  Phoebicius  found  his  sheep-skin  in  his  wife's 
room,"  replied  Petrus  gravely.  "  And  the  impu- 
dent Alexandrian  recognized  it  as  his  own  before  us 
all  and  allowed  the  Gaul  to  punish  him.  He  com- 
mitted the  disgraceful  deed  the  very  evening  that 
you  were  sent  off  to  gain  intelligence." 

"And  Phoebicius  flogged  him?"  cried  Hermas 
beside  himself.  "  And  the  poor  fellow  bore  this 
disgrace  and  your  blame,  and  all — all  for  my  sake. 
Now  I  understand  what  he  meant !  I  met  him  after 
the  battle  and  he  told  me  that  my  father  was  dead. 
When  he  parted  from  me,  he  said  he  was  of  all  sin- 
ners the  greatest,  and  that  I  should  hear  it  said 
down  in  the  oasis.  But  I  know  better  ;  he  is  great- 
hearted and  good,  and  I  will  not  bear  that  he  should 
be  disgraced  and  slandered  for  my  sake."  Hermas 
had  sprung  up  with  these  words,  and  as  he  met  the 
astonished  gaze  of  his  hosts,  he  tried  to  collect  him- 
self, and  said, 

"  Paulus  never  even  saw  Sirona,  and  I  repeat  it, 
if  there  is  a  man  who  may  boast  of  being  good  and 
pure  and  quite  without  sin,  it  is  he.  For  me,  and  to 
save  me  from  punishment  and  my  father  from  sor- 
row, he  owned  a  sin  that  he  never  committed.  Such 
a  deed  is  just  like  him — the  brave — faithful  friend  ! 
But  such  shameful  suspicion  and  disgrace  shall  not 
weigh  upon  him  a  moment  longer !  " 


HOMO  SUM.  335 

"  You  are  speaking  to  an  older  man,"  said  Petrus 
angrily  interrupting  the  youth's  vehement  speech, 
"  Your  friend  acknowledged  with  his  own  lips— 

"  Then  he  told  a  lie  out  of  pure  goodness,"  Hernias 
insisted.  "  The  sheep-skin  that  the  Gaul  found  was 
mine.  I  had  gone  to  Sirona,  while  her  husband 
was  sacrificing  to  Mithras,  to  fetch  some  wine  for 
my  father,  and  she  allowed  me  to  try  on  the  cen- 
turion's armor ;  when  he  unexpectedly  returned  I 
leaped  out  into  the  street  and  forgot  that  luckless 
sheep-skin.  Paulus  met  me  as  I  fled,  and  said  he 
would  set  it  all  right,  and  sent  me  away — to  take 
my  place  and  save  my  father  a  great  trouble.  Look 
at  me  as  severely  as  you  will,  Dorothea,  but  it  was 
only  in  thoughtless  folly  that  I  slipped  into  the 
Gaul's  house  that  evening,  and  by  the  memory  of 
my  father — of  whom  Heaven  has  this  day  bereft 
me — I  swear  that  Sirona  only  amused  herself  with 
me  as  with  a  boy,  a  child,  and  even  refused  to  let 
me  kiss  her  beautiful  golden  hair.  As  surely  as  I 
hope  to  become  a  warrior,  and  as  surely  as  my 
father's  spirit  hears  what  I  say,  the  guilt  that  Paulus 
took  upon  himself  was  never  committed  at  all,  and 
when  you  condemned  Sirona  you  did  an  injustice, 
for  she  never  broke  her  faith  to  her  husband  for  me, 
nor  still  less  for  Paulus." 

Petrus  and  Dorothea  exchanged  a  meaning  glance, 
and  Dorothea  said, 

"  "Why  have  we  to  learn  all  this  from  the  lips  of  a 
stranger?  It  sounds  very  extraordinary,  and. yet 
how  simple  ?  Aye,  husband,  it  would  have  become 


336  HOMO   SUM. 

us  better  to  guess  something  of  this  than  to  doubt 
Sirona.  From  the  first  it  certainly  seemed  to  me 
impossible  that  that  handsome  woman,  for  whom 
quite  different  people  had  troubled  themselves  should 
•  err  for  this  queer  beggar — " 

""What  cruel  injustice  has  fallen  on  the  poor 
man  ! "  cried  Petrus.  "  If  he  had  boasted  of  some 
noble  deed,  we  should  indeed  have  been  less  ready 
to  give  him  credence." 

"We  are  suffering  heavy  punishment,"  sighed 
Dorothea,  "  and  my  heart  is  bleeding.  Why  did 
you  not  come  to  us,  Hernias,  if  you  wanted  wine  ? 
How  much  suffering  would  have  been  spared  if  you 
had  1 " 

The  lad  looked  down,  and  was  silent ;  but  soon 
he  recollected  himself,  and  said  eagerly, 

"  Let  me  go  and  seek  the  hapless  Paulus ;  I  return 
you  thanks  for  your  kindness  but  I  cannot  bear  to 
stay  here  any  longer.  I  must  go  back  to  the  mount- 
ain." 

The  Senator  and  his  wife  did  not  detain  him, 
and  when  the  court-yard  gate  had  closed  upon  him 
a  great  stillness  reigned  in  Petrus'  sitting-room. 
Dorothea  leaned  far  back  in  her  seat  and  sat  looking 
in  her  lap  while  the  tears  rolled  over  her  cheeks  ; 
Marthana  held  her  hand  and  stroked  it,  and  the 
Senator  stepped  to  the  window  and  sighed  deeply 
as  he  looked  down  into  the  dark  court.  Sorrow  lay 
on  all  their  hearts  like  a  heavy  leaden  burden.  All 
was  still  in  the  spacious  room,  only  now  and  then 
a  loud,  long-drawn  cry  of  the  wailing  women  rang 


HOMO  SUM.  337 

through  the  quiet  night  and  reached  them  through 
the  open  window  ;  it  was  a  heavy  hour,  rich  in  vain, 
but  silent  self-accusation,  in  anxiety,  and  short 
prayers ;  poor  in  hope  or  consolation. 

Presently  Petrus  heaved  a  deep  sigh,  and  Doro- 
thea rose  to  go  up  to  him  and  say  to  him  some  sin- 
cere word  of  affection ;  but  just  then  the  dogs  in 
the  yard  barked,  and  the  agonized  father  said  softly 
— in  deep  dejection,  and  prepared  for  the  worst, 

"  Most  likely  it  is  they." 

The  deaconess  pressed  his  hand  in  hers,  but  drew 
back  when  a  light  tap  was  heard  at  the  court-yard 
gate. 

"  It  is  not  Jethro  and  Antonius,"  said  Petrus, 
"  they  have  a  key." 

Marthana  had  gone  up  to  him,  and  she  clung  to 
him  as  he  leaned  far  out  of  the  window  and  called 
to  whoever  it  was  that  had  tapped, 

"  Who  is  that  knocking  ? " 

The  dogs  barked  so  loud  that  neither  the  Senator 
nor  the  women  were  able  to  hear  the  answer  which 
seemed  to  be  returned. 

"  Listen  to  Argus,"  said  Dorothea,  "  he  never  howls 
like  that,  but  when  you  come  home  or  one  of  us,  or 
when  he  is  pleased." 

Petrus  laid  his  linger  on  his  lips  and  sounded  a 
clear,  shrill  whistle,  and  as  the  dogs,  obedient  to 
this  signal,  were  silent,  he  once  more  called  out, 

"  "Whoever  you  may  be,  say  plainly  who  you  are, 
that  I  may  open  the  gate. 

They  were  kept  waiting  some  few  minutes  for 
22 


338  HOMO  SUM. 

the  answer,  and  the  Senator  was  on  the  point  of  re- 
peating his  inquiry,  when  a  gentle  voice  timidly 
came  from  the  gate  to  the  window,  saying, 

"  It  is  I,  Petrus,  the  fugitive  Sirona."  Hardly 
had  the  words  tremulously  pierced  the  silence,  when 
Marthana  broke  from  her  father,  whose  hand  was 
resting  on  her  shoulder,  and  flew  out  of  the  door, 
down  the  steps  and  out  to  the  gate. 

"  Sirona  ;  poor,  dear  Sirona,"  cried  the  girl  as  she 
pushed  back  the  bolt ;  as  soon  as  she  had  opened  the 
door  and  Sirona  had  entered  the  court,  she  threw 
herself  on  her  neck,  and  kissed  and  stroked  her  as  if 
she  were  her  long  lost  sister  found  again ;  then, 
without  allowing  her  to  speak,  she  seized  her  hand 
and  drew  her — in  spite  of  the  slight  resistance  she 
offered — with  many  affectionate  exclamations  up 
the  steps  and  into  the  sitting-room.  Petrus  and 
Dorothea  met  her  on  the  threshold,  and  the  latter 
pressed  her  to  her  heart,  kissed  her  forehead  and 
said,  "  Poor  woman ;  we  know  now  that  we  have 
done  you  an  injustice,  and  will  try  to  make  it  good." 
The  Senator  too  went  up  to  her,  took  her  hand  and 
added  his  greetings  to  those  of  his  wife,  for  he  knew 
not  whether  she  had  as  yet  heard  of  her  husband's 
end. 

Sirona  could  not  find  a  word  in  reply.  She  had 
expected  to  be  expelled  as  a  castaway  when  she 
came  down  the  mountain,  losing  her  way  in  the 
darkness.  Her  sandals  were  cut  by  the  sharp  rocks, 
and  hung  in  strips  to  her  bleeding  feet,  her  beautiful 
hair  was  tumbled  by  the  night-wind,  and  her  white 


HOMO  SUM.  339 

robe  looked  like  a  ragged  beggar's  garment,  for  she 
had  torn  it  to  make  bandages  for  Polykarp' s  wound. 

Some  hours  had  already  passed  since  she  had  left 
her  patient — her  heart  full  of  dread  for  him  and  of 
anxiety  as  to  the  hard  reception  she  might  meet  with 
from  his  parents. 

How  her  hand  shook  with  fear  of  Petrus  and 
Dorothea  as  she  raised  the  brazen  knocker  of  the 
Senator's  door,  and  now — a  father,  a  mother,  a  sister 
opened  their  arms  to  her,  and  an  affectionate  home 
smiled  upon  her.  Her  heart  and  soul  overflowed 
with  boundless  emotion  and  unlimited  thankfulness, 
and  weeping  loudly,  she  pressed  her  clasped  hands 
to  her  breast. 

But  she  spared  only  a  few  moments  for  the  enjoy- 
ment of  these  feelings  of  delight,  for  there  was  no 
happiness  for  her  without  Polykarp,  and  it  was  for 
his  sake  that  she  had  undertaken  this  perilous  night 
journey.  Marthana  had  tenderly  approached  her> 
but  she  gently  put  her  aside,  saying,  "  Not  just  now> 
dear  girl.  I  have  already  wasted  an  hour,  for  I  lost 
my  way  in  the  ravines.  Get  ready,  Petrus,  to  come 
back  to  the  mountain  with  me  at  once,  for — but  do 
not  be  startled,  Dorothea,  Paulus  says  that  the  worst 
danger  is  over,  and  if  Polykarp — 

"For  God's  sake,  do  you  know  where  he  is?" 
cried  Dorothea,  and  her  cheeks  crimsoned  while 
Petrus  turned  pale,  and,  interrupting  her,  asked  in 
breathless  anxiety,  "  Where  is  Polykarp,  and  what 
has  happened  to  him  ? " 

"  Prepare  yourself  to  hear  bad  news,"  said  Sirona, 


340  HOMO  SUM. 

looking  at  the  pair  with  mournful  anxiety  as  if  to 
crave  their  pardon  for  the  evil  tidings  she  was  obliged 
to  bring.  "  Polykarp  had  a  fall  on  a  sharp  stone 
and  so  wounded  his  head.  Paulus  brought  him 
to  me  this  morning  before  he  set  out  against  the 
Blemmyes,  that  I  might  nurse  him.  I  have  inces- 
santly cooled  his  wound,  and  towards  midday  he 
opened  his  eyes  and  knew  me  again,  and  said  you 
would  be  anxious  about  him.  After  sundown  he 
went  to  sleep,  but  he  is  not  wholly  free  from  fever, 
and  as  soon  as  Paulus  came  in  I  set  out  to  quiet  your 
anxiety,  and  to  entreat  you  to  give  me  a  cooling 
potion,  that  I  may  return  to  him  with  it  at  once." 
The  deepest  sorrow  sounded  in  Sirona's  accents  as 
she  told  her  story,  and  tears  had  started  to  her  eyes 
as  she  related  to  the  parents  what  had  befallen  their 
son.  Petrus  and  Dorothea  listened  as  to  a  singer, 
who,  dressed  indeed  in  robes  of  mourning,  neverthe- 
less sings  a  lay  of  return  and  hope  to  a  harp  wreathed 
with  flowers. 

"  Quick,  quick,  Marthana,"  cried  Dorothea  eagerly 
and  with  sparkling  eyes,  before  Sirona  had  ended. 
"  Quick,  the  basket  with  the  bandages.  I  will  mix 
the  fever-draught  myself."  Petrus  went  up  to  the 
Gaulish  woman. 

"  It  is  really  no  worse  than  you  represent  ? "  he 
asked  in  a  low  voice.  "  He  is  alive  ?  and  Paulus — " 

"  Paulus  says,"  interrupted  Sirona,  "  that  with 
good  nursing  the  sick  man  will  be  well  in  a  few 
weeks." 

"  And  you  can  lead  me  to  him  ? " 


HOMO  SUM.  34! 

"  I — oh,  alas  !  alas  ! "  Sirona  cried,  striking  her 
hand  against  her  forehead.  "  I  shall  never  succeed 
in  finding  my  way  back,  for  I  noticed  no  waymarks ! 
But  stay —  Before  us  a  penitent  from  Memphis, 
who  has  been  dead  a  few  weeks — 

"  Old  Serapion  ? "  asked  Petrus. 

"  That  was  his  name,"  exclaimed  Sirona.  Do  you 
know  his  cave  ? " 

"  How  should  I  ? "  replied  Petrus.  "  But  perhaps 
Agapitus — " 

"  The  spring  where  I  got  the  water  to  cool  Poly- 
karp's  wound,  Paulus  calls  the  partridge's-spring." 

"  The  partridge's-spring,"  repeated  the  Senator,  "  I 
know  that."  With  a  deep  sigh  he  took  his  staff,  and 
called  to  Dorothea, 

"  Do  you  prepare  the  draught,  the  bandages, 
torches,  and  your  good  litter,  while  I  knock  at  our 
neighbor  Magadon's  door,  and  ask  him  to  lend  us 
slaves." 

"  Let  me  go  with  you,"  said  Marthana. 

"  No,  no  ;  you  stay  here  with  your  mother." 

"  And  do  you  think  that  I  can  wait  here  ? "  asked 
Dorothea.  "  I  am  going  with  you." 

"  There  is  much  here  for  you  to  do,"  replied  Petrus 
evasively,  "  and  we  must  climb  the  hill  quickly." 

"  I  should  certainly  delay  you,"  sighed  the  mother, 
"  but  take  the  girl  with  you  ;  she  has  a  light  and 
lucky  hand." 

"  If  you  think  it  best,"  said  the  Senator,  and  he 
left  the  room. 

"While  the  mother  and  daughter  prepared  every- 


342  HOMO   SUM. 

thing  for  the  night-expedition,  and  came  and  went, 
they  found  time  to  put  many  questions  and  say  many 
affectionate  words  to  Sirona.  Marthana,  even  with- 
out interrupting  her  work,  set  food  and  drink  for 
the  weary  woman  on  the  table  by  which  she  had 
sunk  on  a  seat ;  but  she  hardly  moistened  her  lips. 

When  the  young  girl  showed  her  the  basket  that 
she  had  filled  with  medicine  and  linen  bandages,  with 
wine  and  pure  water,  Sirona  said,  "  Now  lend  me  a 
pair  of  your  strongest  sandals,  for  mine  are  all  torn, 
and  I  cannot  follow  the  men  without  shoes,  for  the 
stones  are  sharp,  and  cut  into  the  flesh." 

Marthana  now  perceived  for  the  first  time  the  blood 
on  her  friend's  feet,  she  quickly  took  the  lamp  from 
the  table  and  placed  it  on  the  pavement,  exclaiming, 
as  she  knelt  down  in  front  of  Sirona  and  took  her 
slender  white  feet  in  her  hand  to  look  at  the  wounds 
on  the  soles, 

"  Good  Heavens  !  here  are  three  deep  cuts ! '' 

In  a  moment  she  had  a  basin  at  hand,  and  was 
carefully  bathing  the  wounds  in  Sirona's  feet ;  while 
she  was  wrapping  the  injured  foot  in  strips  of  linen 
Dorothea  came  up  to  them. 

"  I  would,"  she  said,  "  that  Polykarp  were  only 
here  now,  this  roll  would  suffice  to  bind  you  both." 
A  faint  flush  overspread  Sirona's  cheeks,  but  Dorothea 
was  suddenly  conscious  of  what  she  had  said,  and 
Marthana  gently  pressed  her  friend's  hand. 

When  the  bandage  was  securely  fixed,  Sirona 
attempted  to  walk,  but  she  succeeded  so  badly  that 
Petrus,  who  now  came  back  with  his  friend  Magadon 


HOMO  SUM.  343 

and  his  sons,  and  several  slaves,  found  it  necessary 
to  strictly  forbid  her  to  accompany  them.  He  felt 
sure  of  finding  his  son  without  her,  for  one  of  Maga- 
don's  people  had  often  carried  bread  and  oil  to  old 
Serapion  and  knew  his  cave. 

Before  the  senator  and  his  daughter  left  the  room 
he  whispered  a  few  words  to  his  wife,  and  together 
they  went  up  to  Sirona. 

"  Do  you  know,"  he  asked,  "  what  happened  to 
your  husband  ? " 

Sirona  nodded.  "I  heard  it  from  Paulus,"  she 
answered.  "  Now  I  am  quite  alone  in  the  world." 

"  Not  so,"  replied  Petrus.  "  You  will  find  shelter 
and  love  under  our  roof  as  if  it  were  your  father's, 
so  long  as  it  suits  you  to  stay  with  us.  You  need 
not  thank  us — we  are  deeply  in  your  debt.  Farewell 
till  we  meet  again,  wife.  I  would  Polykarp  were 
safe  here,  and  that  you  had  seen  his  wound.  Come, 
Marthana,  the  minutes  are  precious." 

"When  Dorothea  and  Sirona  were  alone,  the  dea- 
coness said,  "  Now  I  will  go  and  make  up  a  bed  for 
you,  for  you  must  be  very  tired." 

"  No,  no ! "  begged  Sirona.  "  I  will  wait  and 
watch  with  you,  for  I  certainly  could  not  sleep  till 
I  know  how  it  is  with  him."  She  spoke  so  warmly 
and  eagerly  that  the  deaconess  gratefully  offered  her 
hand  to  her  young  friend.  Then  she  said, 

"  I  will  leave  you  alone  for  a  few  minutes,  for  my 
heart  is  so  full  of  anxiety  that  I  must  needs  go  and 
pray  for  help  for  him,  and  for  courage  and  strength 
for  myself." 


344  HOMO   SUM. 

"  Take  me  with  you,"  entreated  Sirona  in  a  low 
tone.  "  In  my  need  I  opened  my  heart  to  your  good 
and  loving  God,  and  I  will  never  more  pray  to  any 
other.  The  mere  thought  of  Him  strengthened  and 
comforted  me,  and  now,  if  ever,  in  this  hour  I  need 
His  merciful  support." 

"  My  child,  my  daughter  ! "  cried  the  deaconess, 
deeply  moved ;  she  bent  over  Sirona,  kissed  her 
forehead  and  her  lips,  and  led  her  by  the  hand  into 
her  quiet  sleeping-room. 

"  This  is  the  place  where  I  most  love  to  pray," 
she  said,  "  although  there  is  here  no  image  and  no 
altar.  My  God  is  everywhere  present  and  in  every 
place  I  can  find  Him." 

The  two  women  knelt  down  side  by  side,  and  both 
besought  the  same  God  for  the  same  mercies — not  for 
themselves,  but  for  another ;  and  both  in  their  sorrow 
could  give  thanks — Sirona,  because  in  Dorothea  she 
had  found  a  mother,  and  Dorothea,  because  in  Sirona 
she  had  found  a  dear  and  loving  daughter. 


HOMO  SUM.  345 


CHAPTEK  XL 

PATTLUS  was  sitting  in  front  of  the  cave  that  had 
sheltered  Polykarp  and  Sirona,  and  he  watched  the 
torches  whose  light  lessened  as  the  bearers  went 
farther  and  farther  towards  the  valley.  They  lighted 
the  way  for  the  wounded  sculptor,  who  was  being 
borne  home  to  the  oasis,  lying  in  his  mother's  easy 
litter,  and  accompanied  by  his  father  and  his  sister. 

"  Yet  an  hour,"  thought  the  anchorite,  "  and  the 
mother  will  have  her  son  again,  yet  a  week  and 
Polykarp  will  rise  from  his  bed,  yet  a  year  and 
he  will  remember  nothing  of  yesterday  but  a  scar — 
and  perhaps  a  kiss  that  he  pressed  on  the  Gaulish 
woman's  rosy  lips.  I  shall  find  it  harder  to  forget. 
The  ladder  which  for  so  many  years  I  had  labored  to 
construct,  on  which  I  had  thought  to  scale  Heaven, 
and  which  looked  to  me  so  lofty  and  so  safe,  there 
it  lies  broken  to  pieces,  and  the  hand  that  struck  it 
down  was  my  own  weakness.  It  would  almost  seem 
as  if  this  weakness  of  mine  had  more  power  than 
what  we  call  moral  strength,  for  that  which  it  took 
the  one  years  to  build  up,  was  wrecked  by  the  other 
in  a  moment.  In  weakness  only  am  I  a  giant." 

Paulus  shivered  at  these  words,  for  he  was' cold. 
Early  in  that  morning  when  he  had  taken  upon  him- 


346  HOMO  SUM. 

self  Hermas'  guilt  he  had  abjured  wearing  his  sheep- 
skin ;  now  his  body,  accustomed  to  the  warm  wrap, 
suffered  severely,  and  his  blood  coursed  with  fevered 
haste  through  his  veins  since  the  efforts,  night- 
watches,  and  excitement  of  the  last  few  days.  He 
drew  his  little  coat  close  round  him  with  a  shiver  and 
muttered,  "  I  feel  like  a  sheep  that  has  been  shorn  in 
mid-winter,  and  my  head  burns  as  if  I  were  a  baker 
and  had  to  draw  the  bread  out  of  the  oven ;  a  child 
might  knock  me  down,  and  my  eyes  are  heavy.  I 
have  not  even  the  energy  to  collect  my  thoughts  for 
a  prayer,  of  which  I  am  in  such  sore  need.  My  goal 
is  undoubtedly  the  right  one,  but  so  soon  as  I  seem 
to  benearing  it,  my  weakness  snatches  it  from  me, 
as  the  wind  swept  back  the  fruit-laden  boughs  which 
Tantalus,  parched  with  thirst,  tried  to  grasp.  I  fled 
from  the  world  to  this  mountain,  and  the  world  has 
pursued  me  and  has  flung  its  snares  round  my  feet.  I 
must  seek  a  lonelier  waste  in  which  I  may  be  alone — 
quite  alone  with  my  God  and  myself.  There,  perhaps 
I  may  find  the  way  I  seek,  if  indeed  the  fact  that  the 
creature  that  I  call "  I,"  in  which  the  whole  world  with 
all  its  agitations  in  little  finds  room — and  which  will 
accompany  me  even  there — does  not  once  again  frus- 
trate all  my  labor.  He  who  takes  his  Self  with  him 
into  the  desert,  is  not  alone." 

Paulus  sighed  deeply  and  then  pursued  his  reflec- 
tions :  "  How  puffed  up  with  pride  I  was  after  I  had 
tasted  the  Gaul's  rods  in  place  of  Hermas,  and  then 
I  was  like  a  drunken  man  who  falls  downstairs  step 
by  step.  And  poor  Stephanus  too  had  a  fall  when  he 


HOMO  SUM.  347 

was  so  near  the  goal !  He  failed  in  strength  to  for- 
give, and  the  Senator  who  has  just  now  left  me,  and 
whose  innocent  son  I  had  so  badly  hurt,  when  we 
parted  forgivingly  gave  me  his  hand.  I  could  see 
that  he  did  forgive  me  with  all  his  heart,  and  this 
Petrus  stands  in  the  midst  of  life,  and  is  busy  early 
and  late  with  mere  worldly  affairs." 

For  a  time  he  looked  thoughtfully  before  him,  and 
then  he  went  on  in  his  soliloquy,  "  What  was  the 
story  that  old  Serapion  used  to  tell  ?  In  the  Thebai'd 
there  dwelt  a  penitent  who  thought  he  led  a  per- 
fectly saintly  life  and  far  transcended  all  his  compan- 
ions in  stern  virtue.  Once  he  dreamed  that  there  was 
in  Alexandria  a  man  even  more  perfect  than  himself ; 
Phabis  was  his  name,  and  he  was  a  shoemaker, 
dwelling  in  the  "White  road  near  the  harbor  of  Kibo- 
tos.  The  anchorite  at  once  went  to  the  capital  and 
found  the  shoemaker,  and  when  he  asked  him, 
'  How  do  you  serve  the  Lord  ?  How  do  you  conduct 
your  life  ? '  Phabis  looked  at  him  in  astonishment. 
*  I  ?  well,  my  Saviour  !  I  work  early  and  late,  and 
provide  for  my  family,  and  pray  morning  and  even- 
ing in  few  words  for  the  whole  city.'  Petrus,  it 
seems  to  me,  is  such  an  one  as  Phabis ;  but  many 
roads  lead  to  God,  and  we — and  I— 

Again  a  cold  shiver  interrupted  hismeditation,  and 
as  morning  approached  .the  cold  was  so  keen  that 
he  endeavored  to  light  a  fire.  While  he  was  painfully 
blowing  the  charcoal  Hennas  came  up  to  him. 

He  had  learned  from  Polykarp's  escort  where 
Paulus  was  to  be  found,  and  as  he  stood  opposite  his 


34$  HOMO   SUM. 

friend  lie  grasped  his  hand,  stroked  his  rough  hair 
and  thanked  him  with  deep  and  tender  emotion  for 
the  great  sacrifice  he  had  made  for  him  when  he  had 
taken  upon  himself  the  dishonoring  punishment  of 
his  fault. 

Paulus  declined  all  pity  or  thanks,  and  spoke  to 
Hermas  of  his  father  and  of  his  future,  until  it  was 
light,  and  the  young  man  prepared  to  go  down  to  the 
oasis  to  pay  the  last  honors  to  the  dead.  To  his  en- 
treaty that  he  would  accompany  him,  Paulus  only 
answered, 

"  No — no  ;  not  now,  not  now ;  for  if  I  were  to  mix 
with  men  now  I  should  fly  asunder  like  a  rotten 
wine-skin  full  of  fermenting  wine ;  a  swarm  of  bees 
is  buzzing  in  my  head,  and  an  ant-hill  is  growing  in 
my  bosom.  Go  now,  and  leave  me  alone." 

After  the  funeral  ceremony  Hermas  took  an  affec- 
tionate leave  of  Agapitus,  Petrus,  and  Dorothea,  and 
then  returned  to  the  Alexandrian,  with  whom  he 
went  to  the  cave  where  he  had  so  long  lived  with  his 
dead  father. 

There  Paulus  delivered  to  him  his  father's  letter 
to  his  uncle,  and  spoke  to  him  more  lovingly  than  he 
had  ever  done  before.  At  night  they  both  lay 
down  on  their  beds,  but  neither  of  them  found  rest 
or  sleep. 

From  time  to  time  Paulus  murmured  in  a  low 
voice,  but  in  tones  of  keen  anguish,  "  In  vain — all  in 
vain — "  and  again,  "  I  seek,  I  seek — but  who  can 
show  me  the  way  ? " 

They  both  rose  before  daybreak ;   Hermas  went 


HOMO   SUM.  349 

once  more  down  to  the  well,  knelt  down  near  it,  and 
felt  as  though  he  were  bidding  farewell  to  his  father 
and  Miriam. 

Memories  of  every  kind  rose  up  in  his  soul,  and  so 
mighty  is  the  glorifying  power  of  love  that  the  mis- 
erable, brown-skinned  shepherdess  Miriam  seemed  to 
him  a  thousandfold  more  beautiful  than  that  splen- 
did woman  who  filled  the  soul  of  a  great  artist  with 
delight. 

Shortly  after  sunrise  Paulus  conducted  him  to  the 
fishing-port,  and  to  the  Israelite  friend  who  man- 
aged the  business  of  his  father's  house;  he  caused 
him  to  be  bountifully  supplied  with  gold  and  accom- 
panied him  to  the  ship  laden  with  charcoal,  that 
was  to  convey  him  to  Klysma. 

The  parting  was  very  painful  to  him,  and  when 
Hermas  saw  his  eyes  full  of  tears  and  felt  his  hands 
tremble,  he  said,  "  Do  not  be  troubled  about  me, 
Paulus ;  we  shall  meet  again,  and  I  will  never  forget 
you  and  my  father." 

"  And  your  mother,"  added  the  anchorite.  "  I 
shall  miss  you  sorely,  but  trouble  is  the  very  thing  I 
look  for.  He  who  succeeds  in  making  the  sorrows 
of  the  whole  world  his  own — he  whose  soul  is 
touched  by  a  sorrow  at  every  breath  he  draws — he 
indeed  must  long  for  the  call  of  the  Redeemer." 

Hermas  fell  weeping  on  his  neck  and  started  to 
feel  how  burning  the  anchorite's  lips  were  as  he 
pressed  them  to  his  forehead. 

At  last  the  sailors  drew  in  the  ropes ;  Paulus 
turned  once  more  to  the  youth.  "  You  are  going 


350  HOMO   SUM. 

your  own  way  now,"  he  said,  "  Do  not  forget  the 
Holy  Mountain,  and  hear  this  :  Of  all  sins  three  are 
most  deadly:  To  serve  false  gods,  to  covet  your 
neighbor's  wife,  and  to  raise  your  hands  to  kill ; 
keep  yourself  from  them.  And  of  all  virtues  two 
are  the  least  conspicuous,  and  at  the  same  time  the 
greatest :  Truthfulness  and  humility  ;  practise  these. 
Of  all  consolations  these  two  are  the  best :  The  con- 
sciousness of  wishing  the  right,  however  much  we 
may  err  and  stumble  through  human  weakness  and 
prayer." 

Once  more  he  embraced  the  departing  youth,  then 
he  went  across  the  sand  of  the  shore  back  to  the 
mountain  without  looking  ronnd. 

Hermas  looked  after  him  for  a  long  time,  greatly 
distressed,  for  his  strong  friend  tottered  like  a 
drunken  man,  and  often  pressed  his  hand  to  his  head 
which  was  no  doubt  as  burning  as  his  lips. 

The  young  warrior  never  again  saw  the  Holy 
Mountain  or  Paulus,  but  after  he  himself  had  won 
fame  and  distinction  in  the  army,  he  met  again  with 
Petrus'  son,  Polykarp,  whom  the  emperor  had  sent 
for  to  Byzantium  with  great  honor,  and  in  whose 
house  the  Gaulish  woman  Sirona  presided  as  a  true 
and  loving  wife  and  mother. 

After  his  parting  from  Hermas,  Paulus  disap- 
peared. The  other  anchorites  long  sought  him  in 
vain,  as  well  as  Bishop  Agapitus,  who  had  learned 
from  Petrus  that  the  Alexandrian  had  been  punished 
and  expelled  in  innocence,  and  who  desired  to  offer 


HOMO   SUM.  351 

him  pardon  and  consolation  in  his  own  person.  At 
last,  ten  days  after,  Orion  the  Sai'te  found  him  in  a 
remote  cave.  The  angel  of  death  had  called  him 
only  a  few  hours  before  while  in  the  act  of  prayer, 
for  he  was  scarcely  cold.  He  was  leaning  with  his 
forehead  against  the  rocky  wall  and  his  emaciated 
hands  were  closely  clasped  over  Magdalena's  ring. 
When  his  companions  had  laid  him  on  his  bier  his 
noble,  gentle  features  wore  a  pure  and  transfiguring 
smile. 

The  news  of  his  death  flew  with  wonderful  rapid- 
ity through  the  oasis  and  the  fishing-town,  and  far 
and  wide  to  the  caves  of  the  anchorites,  and  even  to 
the  huts  of  the  Amalekite  shepherds.  The  proces- 
sion that  followed  him  to  his  last  resting-place 
stretched  to  an  invisible  distance;  in  front  of  all 
walked  Agapitus  with  the  elders  and  deacons,  and 
behind  them  Petrus  with  his  wife  and  family,  to 
which  Sirona  now  belonged.  Polykarp,  who  was 
now  recovering,  laid  a  palm-branch  in  token  of 
reconcilement  on  his  grave,  which  was  visited  as  a 
sacred  spot  by  the  many  whose  needs  he  had  allevi- 
ated in  secret,  and  before  long  by  all  the  penitents 
from  far  and  wide. 

Petrus  erected  a  monument  over  his  grave,  on 
which  Polykarp  incised  the  words  which  Paulus' 
trembling  fingers  had  traced  just  before  his  death 
with  a  piece  of  charcoal  on  the  wall  of  his  cave : 

"  Pray  for  me,  a  miserable  man — for  I  was  a  man." 

THE   END, 


UNIVERSfTY  OF  ILLINOIS-URBANA 


